These just in from the desk of one Cyn Jyan Young, to be published immediately at his request.

FAO CM PUNK:

Quote:Dear CM,
Stealing titles doesn't make me a champion. Jeffrey is still champion, but these are just details, his reign is moribund. Secondly, Heyman hates Hardy, so your assumption that Heyman has his guy win is so far off the mark you might as well be back in ROH doing flips for smarks.

Cheers,

- N

FAO JP Corino:

Quote:Dear JP Corino,

Haha your promo. How's your head, seems you've been knocked silly. Was that my doing or were you already ?

- N

I don't know man. Hardy winning so much, despite what Heyman may say or do, makes some stuff seem off the wall. And if you want to truly prove yourself? Ask for JP to be put in the match. It's probably rigged anyway.

Rigged, sunshine, you do realise that cunt Heyman wants no part of me or Hardy? Do you do any research before you leap through these false hoops of conclusion in the air? Hardy wins 'so much' because he faces pondweed.JP is welcome in the match as far as I'm concerned. Having an excuse to dissect him would be most appreciated. I could use the comedic relief.

++J.P. Corino++
Is this a challenge? If so the answer is....NO!

A challenge? It's not a challenge, its just a statement that I find you highly amusing to listen to. It doesnt surprise me in the least that with your poor verbal skills you don't want any part of me.

(03-26-2013, 08:58 AM)jpcorino Said: ++J.P. Corino++
Is this a challenge? If so the answer is....NO!

Unknown Soldier: Go figure, Corino is the master of ducking challenges. The instant he figured out who I was he ran with his tail between his legs. At Gauntlet City we find out who the King of XWF is. But for now, we can determine Corino as the King of Vaginas.

++J.P. Corino++
Where is this "so-called" challenge Soldier? And I don't want in on the European Title match because I've seen what happens when you reach the top so quickly. Don't bully me! It's not a road you'll enjoy traveling down and as far as my verbal skills go? Well! I guess you win because I have nothing to say to that.

(03-26-2013, 09:02 AM)Neonero Said: A challenge? It's not a challenge, its just a statement that I find you highly amusing to listen to. It doesnt surprise me in the least that with your poor verbal skills you don't want any part of me.

Yeah; watch out JP, he might attack you with words!

Oh wait.

(03-26-2013, 09:07 AM)CM Punk Said:

(03-26-2013, 09:02 AM)Neonero Said: A challenge? It's not a challenge, its just a statement that I find you highly amusing to listen to. It doesnt surprise me in the least that with your poor verbal skills you don't want any part of me.

Yeah; watch out JP, he might attack you with words!

Oh wait.

I was actually considering dropping some of those pipebombs on him. You know, that half ass trash talk that doesnt even fit the definition of pipebomb, but gets naively given that name anyway.

Trapdoors dear Punk, don't step on them so easily. Hasn't - ahahaha - hasn't Cyren taught you anything?

(03-26-2013, 09:07 AM)jpcorino Said: ++J.P. Corino++
Where is this "so-called" challenge Soldier? And I don't want in on the European Title match because I've seen what happens when you reach the top so quickly. Don't bully me! It's not a road you'll enjoy traveling down and as far as my verbal skills go? Well! I guess you win because I have nothing to say to that.

Unknown Soldier: "Oh, you don't remember? What were you drunk or something? Wait, no that's not possible because you're straight edge. You must just be a complete dumb shit then, my bad. I'll let Nero finish off you two morons."

(03-26-2013, 09:12 AM)Neonero Said:

(03-26-2013, 09:07 AM)CM Punk Said:

(03-26-2013, 09:02 AM)Neonero Said: A challenge? It's not a challenge, its just a statement that I find you highly amusing to listen to. It doesnt surprise me in the least that with your poor verbal skills you don't want any part of me.

Yeah; watch out JP, he might attack you with words!

Oh wait.

I was actually considering dropping some of those pipebombs on him. You know, that half ass trash talk that doesnt even fit the definition of pipebomb, but gets naively given that name anyway.

Trapdoors dear Punk, don't step on them so easily. Hasn't - ahahaha - hasn't Cyren taught you anything?

Again, just like Mystery, pulling something out that's irrelevant (you can't actually attack him with words) and using it against me. All you and him are fucking insults strung together to look tough with maybe a point in there to look good.

That's all I have to say. OOC, btw, because you're on my fucking nerves. Hell, you probably are mystery.

(03-26-2013, 09:14 AM)Unknown Soldier Said:

(03-26-2013, 09:07 AM)jpcorino Said: ++J.P. Corino++
Where is this "so-called" challenge Soldier? And I don't want in on the European Title match because I've seen what happens when you reach the top so quickly. Don't bully me! It's not a road you'll enjoy traveling down and as far as my verbal skills go? Well! I guess you win because I have nothing to say to that.

Unknown Soldier: "Oh, you don't remember? What were you drunk or something? Wait, no that's not possible because you're straight edge. You must just be a complete dumb shit then, my bad. I'll let Nero finish off you two morons."

OOC - Either site where you challenged me or stop saying I ducked you!

OOC: I'll say whatever I want IN CHARACTER and here's the link you crybaby http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=1225

This is the most adorable thing I've ever seen.

Two little boys in matching whining voices bitching about how they want challenges and then duck challenges.

Are you going to start rhyming one after the other?

Please tell me Cyren trains you two with a slide whistle so you two stay on key while you drop your meandering promos about how "wrestling's fixed *wink*".

JP, have you gotten a pair of basketball shorts so you and your buddy Punk can have matching uniforms?

Because this is precious.

I'd pull out a camera and capture this moment if my wall wasn't already covered with the memories of rookies bitching about how impossible it was to rise up.

(03-26-2013, 09:20 AM)Unknown Soldier Said: OOC: I'll say whatever I want IN CHARACTER and here's the link you crybaby http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=1225

So you'll make something up in order to make me look weak? Good to know!

OOC: So, anything that happens IN CHARACTER is going to set you into a mood swing OOC, good to know.

JP, Punk, don't forget your purses on the way out.

OOC: JP, Punk, don't forget your purses on the way out.

(03-26-2013, 09:23 AM)Unknown Soldier Said: OOC: So, anything that happens IN CHARACTER is going to set you into a mood swing OOC, good to know.

OOC: Not really. Just was annoying how people like Nero and Mystery just insult and insult and insult, but have so little of a fucking point. They can cut the fat out of their posts, and save us all some time. It's like listening to a Rock modern day promo, and you all are the fans, licking the inside of his asshole slowly.

(03-26-2013, 09:26 AM)CM Punk Said:

(03-26-2013, 09:23 AM)Unknown Soldier Said: OOC: So, anything that happens IN CHARACTER is going to set you into a mood swing OOC, good to know.

OOC: Not really. Just was annoying how people like Nero and Mystery just insult and insult and insult, but have so little of a fucking point. They can cut the fat out of their posts, and save us all some time. It's like listening to a Rock modern day promo, and you all are the fans, licking the inside of his asshole slowly.

OOC: Oh, so I didn't just see you two get upset OOC about IC statements? Yes, I really just saw that so yes it really just happened. Here's an idea, if you don't think that their statements have a point then make it vocalized IC instead of going OOC in an In character section. Nobodies trying to hurt your feelings personally, this is a game so don't get annoyed with anything said IN CHARACTER!

Hey FLO! Come check this shit out.

That piece of shit Neonero just made CM Punk and CM Corino cry.

Hey Neonero, when you're done picking on these two little identical Shitheads, why don't you meet me in the Gauntlet!

What the fuck is 'OOC?' Out Of Charisma? Is that where your promo flops and you start crying like a baby?

(03-26-2013, 09:33 AM)John Madison Said: Hey FLO! Come check this shit out.

That piece of shit Neonero just made CM Punk and CM Corino cry.

Hey Neonero, when you're done picking on these two little identical Shitheads, why don't you meet me in the Gauntlet!

OOC: Everybody needs to simmer the hell down, nah!

Cyren walks up behind C.M. Punk and JP Corino... watching as they engage in a war of words with certain members of the XWF community.

CYREN: Neonero, haven't you and I beaten the living hell out of each other enough times to a draw, that we can probably lay our cocks down and not swing them around frivolously? If you're so determined to establish yourself as a 'superior entity' to Corino and Punk, where the hell have you been? Why have you been a phantom for so long? I layed down and took my beatings if I wasn't in the right mindset - I didn't just run away and flee. I imagine that Madison would eviscerate you at Gauntlet City. Really... you're one of the 'good guys?' (cough, oh that's right, you're actually a 'villain' who presents yourself in the most adorable of ways....)

Lighting a cigarette, the Legend walks over to Unknown Soldier...

CYREN: You and I, we've never had issues... however, I feel it's needed of for me to intervene for the sake of my clients. You're a 'rock star' here, man. Why do you feel the need to interject yourself into this conversation? It's oddball and out of left field - so let's drop ti while it's hot, capish? I'll even buy ya some goat meth and we'll smash on Blair together, mon freire?

At that, Cyren just looks at Madison.

He looks at John Black, his other client, picking cotton from a vending machine behind John.

CYREN: Okay, here's twenty bucks... keep him occupied...

(ADDENDUM)

CYREN: Also, Neonero, oddly enough you labeled these as 'Dear John' letters... why? That intimates that you've been having sex with my clients and now wish to sever that romantic relationship in favor of another...

A "Dear John letter" is a letter written to a husband or boyfriend by his spouse or significant other to inform him their relationship is over, usually because the author has found another lover.

Taking a moment to look at the people in the crowd surrounding his clients, he sees Neonero's eyes peak every once in a while over at Madison.

CYREN: Ah, I get it now...

Hey Flo!

Look, it's the XWF legend that I pissed on last Saturday! Maybe he should pass that message on to those two idiotic clients of his.

JP Corino-- Paul Heyman is not the con artist that you say he is, but I AM. Your embarrassing loss to Jeff Hardy will pale in comparison to what I'm gonna do to you at Gauntlet City. Maybe then you can drop a pipe bomb about how Shane screwed you into being a victim of John Madison's golden shower.

Cyren, firstly I don't remember waving my cock at you, I've just been laughing at these scrubs.

And secondly, 'where I have been' is not yet open to discussion, but are you seriously saying with a straight face that it's better to become XWF's resident whore, lie down in the ring legs apart accepting a raping from any and everyone, than it is to accept that you are what you are - washed up, terminally unoriginal, grasping vainly at whatever pop culture bs that grabs your apparently tiny attention span, than it is to say 'ok, I'm going to quit while I am ahead' or 'I need to recharge'? Is it in fact your bleeding anus that these kids are trying to emulate, and not your glory days?

You set a positive example for these bleeding vaginas you have in your thrall, good game, Cyren, good game.

CYREN: Had I not just retired and recognized my own mortality, I would deign to dance with you yet again in the middle of that ring, Neo - in absence of that, I'm more then happy to offer my clients up as suitable combatants. And if anyone has been the lascivious prostitute around here, it's yourself creating this illusion that you still some how matter and/or have prominence. You suck on the XWF's cock and expect it to shower honeymilk dew upon you? You're a sad excuse for a vagrant, indeed.... now move along, fore I'm forced to thrash you once again.

Taking a moment to dump some piss all over himself, shaking it off like 'Triple H', he gets a stern grimace set upon his face. 'The Sickness' continues to speak...

CYREN: And Madison, you pissed on me? I liked it, motherfucker! I drink Piss Juice for breakfast, lunch and dinner! Great source of salt! Hardens them arteries and helps me be more durable! Hell, I'd love to invite you to a 'fecal tea', later this afternoon, in fact! Would you like to accompany me? We can do goth meth and drink 'shitty tea.'

I know you do Cyren! You just say the word and I'll piss in your face.

Look at your manager CM Punk. That's your future; getting pissed on by John Madison. Haha! Since your manager is into that kind of thing I can only assume that you want the same exact treatment. Don't worry, you'll get it at Gauntlet City, because Straight Edge means you drink John Madison's piss.

(03-26-2013, 10:20 AM)Neonero Said:

Hey Punk, are you listening to Cyren? He's using mean words, what should I do? I mean I know you've been in the horrible position of being trash talked, I could use some one to one advice. I can't stop shaking.

Laughing as Neonero continues to mutter, he saunts up to the man, resting his hand on his shoulder.

CYREN: Friend, it's quite alright. There's no malice behind the words, yet but truth! Stop your quivering, sweet child. Come here... come to papa...

At that, Cyren opens his arms, urging Neonero to embrace him...

Allow me to address the request from Mr. Punk lobbying to get his house boy or home boy or whatever you call it into the European title match at Gauntlet City...


*Ahemmm*


"Bite me."


Thank you.

(03-26-2013, 10:21 AM)John Madison Said: I know you do Cyren! You just say the word and I'll piss in your face.

Look at your manager CM Punk. That's your future; getting pissed on by John Madison. Haha! Since your manager is into that kind of thing I can only assume that you want the same exact treatment. Don't worry, you'll get it at Gauntlet City, because Straight Edge means you drink John Madison's piss.

"... just say the word..."

It echoes around Cyren's skull and he becomes hypnotized, not focusing on the rest of Madison's mumbling....

CYREN: PISS! Is that the word? Oh, no, perhaps it might be UTTER FAILURE? For that's what you are? You resort to having minions do your dirty work for you soeth that you might salvage some of that 'pristine reputation' that you have, eh? Well, let's do it hombre! Let your 'freak pole' flow!

Holdiing a knife behind him, Cyren winks!

(03-26-2013, 08:58 AM)jpcorino Said: ++J.P. Corino++
Is this a challenge? If so the answer is....NO!

(03-26-2013, 10:23 AM)Paul Heyman Said: Allow me to address the request from Mr. Punk lobbying to get his house boy or home boy or whatever you call it into the European title match at Gauntlet City...


*Ahemmm*


"Bite me."


Thank you.

Put JP in the match, or I'll make you drink CYREN's piss! and Madisons!

Wow, I guess that pipe bomb thing isn't working out for you, is it?

Thank Goodness for CM Punk's notierty for making pipebombs known in the world of WWE.

Thanks Amigo, let's watch some few infamous Pipebombs..

I love how the minute John Black said something, everyone else scattered.

So... who's horny?