WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2017 THE ASIAN TOUR CONTINUES IN BEIJING, CHINA... THIS IS WEDNESDAY NIGHT WARFARE!!!! LIVE FROM THE BEIJING NATIONAL STADIUM!!

KATHERINE STARR - vs - LEXUS KNIGHT - vs - MISS FORTUNE Bombshell Triple Threat! JIM CAEDUS - vs - CORY HENDRICKSON PETER GILMOUR - vs - GRANDE RICARDO If Ricardo wins, he gets his Bombshell Title match! "THE MOTHERFUCKERS" ROBBIE BOURBON & BEARDED WAR PIG - vs - FINN KUHN & CHRIS VALERIUS X-TREME CHAMPIONSHIP THE ENGINEER - vs - JENNY MYST

Pyro explodes all over the stage as the packed house in Beijing goes wild!

Finally, the camera settles on the announcers' desk where we see Luca Arzegotti flanked by an unfamiliar face.




The diminutive man speaks up first.


Welcome to Warfare, ladies and gentlemen, my name is Pip Collins, and I am thee new play by play man here in the booth with my friend Luca Arzegotti!


Yeahhhh, Old Man Johnson got him some angina or alzheimer's or irritable bowel syndrome or some shit and had to take an undetermined leave of absence.


I heard it was all three, Luca! But enough about me, let's get straight to the activities in the ring, where we are all set for some BOMBSHELL action!

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"The following contest is our opening match for the evening, is scheduled for one fall and is an XWF Bombshell Triple Threat!"

The fans, more specifically the MALE fans, erupt.

"Blech...I wish Vinnie never instituted this division."

"Funny, I was about to say thank God he did."

"Really, Old Man? Ok, let's pretend for a second you, like me, are a higher evolution of man."

"You mean gay?"

"..................Yes. Anyhoo, tell me ONE thing the Bombshell Division has pulled off- and DON'T say panties or anything of the sort ya dusty ol' creep -beyond giving Jenny Myst the success she doesn't deserve? I mean take these last two weeks for instance, did Katherine Starr or Miss Fortune do a DAMN thing to promote this match? No, no they didn't. If it weren't for Lexus Knight, SWEET name btw, this match would have ZERO hype!"



"Introducing first, from Miami, Florida, weighing in at 110 pooooounds...MISS...FORTUUUUUUUUNE!!"

Miss Fortune struts from behind the curtain, checking herself in her phone and taking selfies. She grins as she snaps pictures and walks completely down the ramp, up the steps, and underneath the bottom rope into the ring.

"So creative, a chick obsessed with her phone and taking selfies."

"What the hell, Luca, you do the same damn thing! You're doing it right now!"

Luca finishes his snap and sends it out to his followers.

"People WANT to see me do this, Old Man. I actually HAVE a fan base."



"Hailing from Battle Creek, Michigan and weighing in at none of your busineeeeeeess...she IS...KATHERIIIINE STAAAAAAAARR!!"

Purple smoke rolls onto the stage as the sultry magician Katherine Starr struts onto the stage. Blowing a kiss to the audience, Katherine confidently walks down the entrance ramp with a single spotlight shining down on her, twirling a wand in her hand. When she enters the ring, she mouths something and holds up her wand, causing golden pyro to shoot from the ring posts as the rest of the arena lights come on! She stands in the middle of the ring, basking in her own glory, before walking over to her corner, giving her hat and wand to a ringside attendant.

Miss Fortune wanders over to take a pic with her, Katherine is more than happy to oblige.

"Oh for fucksake...damn chicks."

"Would you knock it off!"



"And the third opponent...hailing from parts unknown and weighing in at anyone's best guess...LLLLLLLLEXUS KNIGHT!!

The oddly facepainted Bombshell tears her way through the egress curtains and runs at full clip down to the ring, sliding in beneath the bottom rope and popping to her feet while Katherine Starr and Miss Fortune continue taking snaps with eachother, seemingly oblivious to the fact Lexus Knight has entered.

Before Nipsey can even ring the damn bell, Lexi charges her unaware opponents, nailing them BOTH with a DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE that sends them tumbling over the top rope!!!

Miss Fortune unluckily lands awkwardly on her neck as he hits the apron then flops to ringside. Katherine thanks her lucky starrs she clears the apron and just lands in a heap.


DING DING DING


Mika looks to Lexus, who scoffs and shakes her head in disappointment. Miss Hunt begins her count.


1!
















2!!


















3!!!
















4!!!!

















5!!!!!












Katherine Starr stirs.

6!!!!!!











7!!!!!!!








She rises to her feet slowly.

8!!!!!!!!













She rolls in.


9!!!!!!!!!
















10!!!!!!!!!!


"Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Fortune has been ELIMINATED from this match by count out!!"

ELIMINATED - MISS FORTUNE

"Wait, wait, wait...is that legal? This isn't an elimination match."

"Well clearly that girl ain't getting up. She may have broken her neck. Can we get some help down here?"

Katherine, looking to be in agony herself over that wicked fall she'd been totally unprepared for, turns from gazing down at Miss Fortune over the ropes to see-





-Lexus Knight barreling down upon her, an evil, predatory grin across her painted lips.


Lexus executes a LEAPING KNEE STRIKE to Katherine's skull!! The Magic Mistress stumbles forward, looking as if she's completely out on her feet. Lexus Knight then jumps, wraps an arm around Kat's neck from behind and-


L
I
V
I
N
G

N
I
G
H
T
M
A
R
E


LEXUS HOOKS THE LEG!!





1!


















2!!



















3!!!


DING DING DING

Winner: LEXUS KNIGHT

"Its already over? What the fuck, the ENTRANCES took longer than the actual match!! This bitch is pretty bad ass!!"

"I wholeheartedly agree, Luca."

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The camera is on a bike following a black Jaguar XJK, with blacked out windows.
The registration number reads 'JC2 KO'. The car turns a left corner and pulls up outside some double doors, the camera stops and the biker runs over to the cars rear passenger side door trying to get a glimpse of someone.

As the door opens, the camera looks down to see a pair of pristine white trainers with letters JC engraved on the heels, the mystery guest has no socks but lightly tanned shaved, muscular legs, the camera pans up, the door obscuring a majority of the body but it soon becomes clear, this guest is a white, fairly tall, strong male. As the camera continues upwards, the male is wearing some dark shades, he has at least 2 weeks growth of beard which is a very clean, well kept image. He has a black baseball cap and is wearing some kind of collared shirt and jacket.

The camera watches on but takes a step back as the male stretches his arms and reaches back in behind him to grab a ports holdall by both of its handles as he throws the main strap over his shoulder and smiles showing off his pearly white teeth.
The character image begins to develop on camera, as he lowers his dark glasses, waves towards the cameraman and walks off with a wink from his left eye, as he walks off he pushes the glasses back up to his face. The male is now clearly seen wearing a white shirt under a buttoned up cream coloured cotton sports jacket.

The double doors throw open mysteriously as the male walks on in but the camera doesn't yet follow. The cameraman precariously sneaks up to the double doors and almost like a spy, they peep in and make their way through the double doors shutting them quietly behind.
The cameraman continues to follow the male as they reach a long corridor, the male walks blissfully, seemingly unaware of his trail being tagged, the male turns a left corner and as the cameraman tries to follow, the male vanishes.
The cameraman looks out frantically trying to keep a tag on him like a predator stalking its prey, after a minute or so the cameraman gives up and lowers the camera down to the floor, their is a struggle as the cameraman tries to walk away back up the corridor, some loud footsteps can be heard as the camera thumps to the floor and a black baseball cap lands just in front.
The male is seen walking back up the corridor but with out his bag, he appears to be removing his beard and glasses and removing his cream jacket throwing them to the floor.

A few minutes later CCTV catches images of the male in a black cap and white shirt making his way through what appears to be the main arena.

The camera goes fuzzy and the segment ends.

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We've got a newcomer in the ring by the name of Cory Hendrickson, Luca... and he has a heck of a challenge as he faces former Universal Champion, Lethal Lottery 4 winner, and most recently Leap of Faith winner, Mister 24/7 himself, Jim Caedus!


Sho' nuff, Pip, my dog. I'm not sure who booked this rookie against a guy of Jimmy C's caliber, but I don't like the odds for Hendrickson tonight!



In the ring, Tig O'Bitties stands with her microphone.

The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL! Introducing first, from Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at 220 pounds... CORRRYYYYYYY HENDRICKSONNNNN!!!


The crowd claps politely, unure of what to think.


And his opponent...






The crowd pops massively when they recognize the music...


He is the winner of this year's XWF Leap of Faith, and currrent holder of the 24/7 briefcase... from the High Desert, California... THIS IS.... JIIIIMMMMMM CAEEEEDUSSSSSS!!!!!


The now familiar opening notes to "Ready Steady Go" by Paul Oakenfold begin to blast from the PA moments before the ring announcer plugs. The fans erupt. As the spiel is unloaded the lights cut, plunging the arena in darkness before silver strobes begin to flash and silver spotlights begin to continuously wave from along the length of the entrance walkway to the crowd and back.

Obviously practiced and well-timed, the moment the announcer finishes, "ready, steady, g-g-go!" is let fly by the song's vocalist and silver pyro erupts from the egress. Before the cloud of smoke dissipates, the former XWF Universal Champion Jim Caedus, sadly sans strap, steps out as the house lights come up.

His hair hangs freely, emotion absent in his eyes. He glances around at the majority population of fans who now know exactly who he is. The small pockets of his smarks seem less enthused to be a part of the crowd but remain cheering nonetheless.

As the music continues he turns his attention to the ring and it's inhabitant(s) then starts an unconcerned slow walk, carefully gathering his long blonde hair into a secured samurai-style bun along the way. At ringside he removes his Dickies jacket, folds it carefully beside his corner's steps then ascends to the apron, stepping through the ropes and into battle after nearly 2 minutes have elapsed.

Referee Chaz Bobo signals for the bell.

Ding!




Ding!




Ding!

Jim Caedus the shorter of the two charges in swift and fierce delivery a machine gun barrage of closed fists, lefts and rights. Ten to fifteen Irish-German brick like fists weaken Cory Hendrickson’s ribs before he is able to pulls his arms up in a defensive posture. Absorbing the next fifteen blows with his forearms, Cory delivers a heavy front kick to Jim’s stomach. Bending over in ‘grumbling’ pain Jim holds his belly wincing in pain. Wasting no time Cory strikes again with a thunderous uppercut sending Jim flying back into the turnbuckle. Cory takes off full sprint toward his dazed opponent like a charging rhinoceros delivery a sprinting Elbow Smash...

Caedus drops to a knee with only a second before Cory’s elbow cracked the side of his skull wide open. Swiftly and effectively Caedus conducts a combat roll out of harms way from the spin around snap kick Cory Hendrickson rapidly conducts after missing with an explosive elbow. Hendrickson almost stumbles headfirst after missing with a powerful snap kick, Caedus wraps his arm around Hendrickson’s neck and drops completing Cory’s stumble with one of the wickedest DDT’s. Cory’s face bounces off the canvas like a rubber ball from the force of all two hundred and thirty pounds of Jim Fuckin Caedus falling backwards with his head locked tight between his bicep and armpit.

Jim hops back to his feet, while Cory begins to roll on the mat holding his throbbing head. Referee Chaz Bobo checks on Cory by tapping his shoulder and asking, “Are you okay to continue?” Enraged and a little humiliated Cory pushes Chaz’s arm away and begins to climb to all fours. Caedus comes charging into delivering a punt like kick to the midsection of the fallen Cory Hendrickson. Hendrickson goes rolling toward the ropes with Caedus in hot pursuit of the tumbling carcass. Cory’s body comes to a halt arms sprawled out, Caedus wastes no time and begins stomping a mud hole in his ass. Cory takes a defensive posture causing Caedus to adapt.

Lifting Cory to his feet by his wrist and hair Caedus delivers a swift kick to his opponent’s stomach keeping him from easily countering. With a throbbing head and now abdominal wrenching Cory is easily Irish Whipped into the ropes. Flying toward the ropes from the momentum from Caedus, Cory catches a second wind. He quickly begins moving his legs, spinning his body just in time. Cory’s back presses back into the ropes, launching forward like a rock in a slingshot!










Wham!








Caedus misses with a hard clothesline. On the other hand Cory did not miss with a big boot, connecting to Caedus’s skull sending him flipping over and falling face first to the canvas. Placing the same boot that knocked Caedus’s soul from his body presses firmly on the chest of a very dazed Jim. Chad drops to the canvas and raises his arm high in the air before bringing it down for the three count attempt...
















One...

Bobo’s arm rises high again.






















Two...

Bobo’s hand rises again after impacting the canvas...






































Caedus raises a shoulder but is quickly planted back to the canvas shoulders down from three heavy and hard heels of Cory’s boot. Instead of going for another quick most likely failed pin attempt Cory reaches down and grabs Jim by his beard and hair. Yanking him to his feet relentlessly, almost ripping hair from scalp and face. Pain and more pain is the only expression Caedus is able to display as he quickly rises to his feet. Cory sends Caedus crashing back to the canvas with a breath taking side Sidewalk Slam!

Caedus lands on his already beaten mid section which Cory Hendrickson has primarily focusing on the duration of the match so for. Not releasing the hold after the Sidewalk Slam, Cory then lifts Caedus into the air and begins bear hugging the air from his lungs with a boa grip. Parading around the ring like he is celebrating in victory with a struggling Jim Caedus. Slowly loosing color from the lack of oxygen and movement. Caedus nails begin to slowly dig into the forearms of Hendrickson who quickly head butts Jim. Effect maneuver it is. Jim removes his nails from Hendrickson’s flesh as he begins to lose consciousness.

Chaz reaches for Caedus’s arm but before he even makes contact Jim’s fist balls and he jerks his head backwards over and over. Smashing the back of his skull into the nose of Cory who begins spraying blood as the waterworks commence. Hendrickson’s grip weakens, allowing Jim to break free and take back control of the match. Jim does just that with a technically sound executed belly-to-belly overhead Suplex sending Cory slamming into the canvas. His body then proceeds to roll toward the ropes, under the ropes, and falling hard to the padded floor below the ring.

The fans explode from out of their seats as Jim Caedus begins to taunt and bask in the roar of the crowd. Meanwhile outside the ring on his back Tommy stares up at the rafters attempting to catch his breath and push the pain to the side. Chaz begins the count.

1...








2...








3...

Cory Hendrickson begins to stir. Slowly rolling to his belly.








4...













5...

Tommy now climbs to his knee and one fist on the floor. Some fans begin to chant, “Cory Hendrickson, Cory Hendrickson, Cory Hendrickson!”











6...














7...

Cory now climbs to his feet motivated by his fans that still believe he has what it takes to win. Feeding off the fan’s chants Cory begins embarking toward the ring sliding in under the bottom ropes breaking Chaz’s ten count. Only to be met with a number of body and head stomps from the well-recuperated Jim Caedus, shutting the Cory Hendrickson noise down. Caedus then attempts to bring Cory to his feet but is unexpectedly taken from his feet from a nasty jawbreaker off the top of Cory’s head.

Both men lay on the canvas Caedus holding his jaw and Cory feeling pain all over. Jim begins slamming his fists on the canvas before climbing to his feet before Chaz even has a chance to begin a count. Cory makes his way to the northeast turnbuckle and begins using the ropes to help make his way to his feet. Caedus realizes what is happening and charges in grabbing Cory by his hair while he is on his knees and begins smashing his face into the second turnbuckle.

One!



















Two!





















Three!




















Four!























Five!


























Six!











Jim then lifts Cory to his feet and wraps his arms around his waist using all his strength to squeeze the life from his body as he executes a beautiful Tilt-O-Whirl Backbreaker. Caedus then takes off towards the furthest ropes away from Cory, bouncing off the ropes; Cory quickly climbs to his feet from the Backbreaker and charges Jim. Caedus catches Cory and lifts him in the air and then smashes him down with a monstrous spine buster. After flattening Hendrickson like a pancake, Jim begins to viciously stomp, kick, and punch the dazed Cory Hendrickson. Sprinting toward the nearest ropes, Jim bounces off and delivers a stiff sprinting elbow drop, which bruises a few of Hendrickson’s ribs.

Then after jawing to the crowd and holding up fingers in sequence... 2... 4... 7... Caedus smiles and pulls the new kid up by his hair. He roughly drags him into position and then...



KATABAAAAAAAAAAASSSSIIIIISSSSSSSSS!!!



Jim Caedus brushes his hands off together after dropping Hendrickson's skull on the canvas, then hooks a leg.




1!
















2!

























3!!!!

Winner - JIM CAEDUS!

That newcomer was completely out of his league against "Mister 24/7," Jim Caedus!


Most people are, my man, most people are...

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The following match is scheduled for one fall introducing first from Los Angeles, California, weighing in at 260 pounds! Ruler and God of Xtreme Men, Peter Fucccckkkkkiiiinnngggggg Gilmourrrrrrrrrrrr!






The lights in the arena dim, then go to full black. We then hear the eerie sounds of a bell being tolled and then an explosion of fire emitting from the entrance ramp. The beginning of COMANCHE by IN THIS MOMENT begins as the heavy guitar riffs kick in and red strobes dance around the stage. As soon as the verse kicks in, we see Peter Gilmour and his wife Maria Brink come out to the ramp. They smile at each other before going down the ramp hand in hand. Peter bobs his head to the song. They get in the ring together and Peter gets on the turnbuckle and throws up an "X" sign as pyro goes off above the ring. Peter hops down and kisses Maria as they wait for his next victim.






And his opponent from parts unknown, weighing in at 170 pounds! Grandeeee Ricardoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!







As My Dragon Pal and me plays, an Timothy Omundson's sweet voice drifts through the arena, Grande Ricardo walks down to the ring, calmly, and slides under the ropes.




THE BELL SOUNDS




Gilmour slowly struts to the center of the ring cockily mocking Grande. Grande squares up with Gilmour the two jaw each other for a few moments when the much larger Gilmour pushes Grande off his feet to the canvas. Gilmour laughs pointing at the downed Grande. Gilmour takes a step back inviting Grande up to his feet. Grande takes the invitation squaring up with Gilmour again! Gilmour mocks Grande! Gilmour tells Grande ”Your too little to beat a God!” Grande is first to take a swing with a wild right hand. Gilmour quickly blocks it shoving Grande back into the ropes. Grande bounces off the ropes Gilmour goes for a close line! Grande ducks under bouncing off the ropes on the opposite side of the ring. Gilmour rushes in with a big boot. Grande slides under Gilmour’s legs. Grande takes Gilmour’s back locking his hands around Gilmour’s waist. Grande tries to German suplex Gilmour. Gilmour quickly grabs the top rope preventing Grande from suplexing him! Gilmour looks over his shoulder hitting Grande with a huge elbow. Grande releases Gilmour’s waist! Grande holds the side of his head stumbling back into the center of the ring! Gilmour charges full speed hitting Grande with a huge close line.




Gilmour sees an opening. Gilmour quickly runs over to the turnbuckle and climbs to the top rope. Gilmour takes a huge leap into the air dropping a huge elbow right into the heart of Grande. Gilmour sits there for a moment mocking Grande again! Gilmour mounts Grande and begins throwing haymakers. Grande covers up the best he can. Gilmour quickly gets to his feet stomping around the ring screaming!”Your No God!” Gilmour walks over to Grande to pull him up. Grande rolls Gilmour up in a small package. The ref quickly hits the mat to count!


1...


















2...






















Grande has a hand full of tights!!!













Peter kicks out! Both men are up quickly. Gilmour goes for a close line Grande ducks underneath hitting a huge Samoan drop in the center of the ring. Grande stomps Gilmour a few hard times before bouncing off the middle rope hitting a lion sault. Grande quickly rolls Gilmour over still in the center of the ring and begins stomping away at Gilmour’s lower back. Gilmour gets on all fours crawling towards the ropes but Grande grabs peters foot pulling him back into the center of the ring and begins stomping away at Gilmour’s back once more! Gilmour winces in pain with every stomp! Grande then begins stomping away at the bigger man’s legs and knees working his way back up to the lower back! Gilmour is in serious pain now! Grande smiles applying a Boston crab! Gilmour is stuck in the middle of the ring and in serious pain! Gilmour glances at the ref asking him if he wants to give up. Gilmour screams no! Gilmour begins pulling himself and Grande towards the ropes. Grande notices quickly pulling back even harder applying more pressure! Gilmour shakes his head! Pulling closer and closer towards the ropes. Gilmour reaches out grabbing the bottom rope! The ref quickly jumps in starting a five count on Grande who doesn’t let go until 4 and 1/2! Grande stomps Gilmour’s back again pulling him back into the center of the ring.





Grande quickly climbs to the top rope. Grande waste no time he leaps off the top rope landing a huge double stomp right to the middle of Gilmour’s back. Grande goes for the cover!


1...










































2...




































Gilmour Kicks out! Grande cannot believe Gilmour kicked out! Grande and the ref exchange a few words before Grande goes back on the attack. Grande pulls Gilmour up from the canvas hitting Gilmour with a few hard shots before whipping Gilmour into the turnbuckle. Grande runs towards Gilmour out in the turnbuckle!








I do Cocaine


















Gilmour moves!
















Grande’s shoulder smacks the ring post hard! Grande pulls himself from the ring post!

















Gilmour Cutter




















Both men are down!

















Gilmour goes for the cover








1...




































2...



































Gilmour’s feet is on the middle rope

































Grande kicks out!








Gilmour rolls off of Grande slamming his hands into the canvas screaming at the ref! ”That was three!!!” Gilmour turns around and is met with a kick to the gut from Grande! Grande knees Gilmour then whipping Gilmour into the ropes! Gilmour hits the ropes hard ducks a close line from Grande bouncing off the other side! Gilmour leaps into the air going for a flying yakuza kick! Grande counters!














Brahmin bomb





















Gilmour counters



























Midair Gilmour Cutter! Out of nowhere!


















Gilmour goes for the cover










1...







































2...



































Grande kicks out of a second Gilmour cutter!









Gilmour is beside himself! He cannot believe Grande has kicked out of a second Gilmour Cutter! Gilmour pulls Grande up from the canvas landing a hard right hand. Grande retaliates with a huge left hand! The two men stand in the middle of the ring exchanging bombs for a few moments when Gilmour because of size gets the upper hand! Gilmour tosses Grande into the turnbuckle landing a few hard body shots! Grande quickly turns the tables hitting Gilmour with a few elbow shots fighting his way out of the corner! Gilmour covers up but Grande kicks Gilmour in the gut! Gilmour bends down! Grande Lifts Gilmour up for a powerbomb! Grande turns around and buckle bombs, Gilmour! Grande quickly mounts the ropes pulling Gilmour up with him! The two begin to again exchange hard shots teetering in all directions! Both men are on the top rope now fighting! Grande hits a few hard elbow shots. Gilmour comes back with a huge headbutt followed by a European uppercut! Grande falls forward! Gilmour yells out!”FUCK IT”













DEATHSTRIKE FROM THE TOP ROPE!!!!



Gilly with a quick cover!









1!






























2!





































3!!!!!!

Winner - PETER GILMOUR!

My nigga Gilly took this one straight to the bank, y'feel me?

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Here we go! This should be a good one! [red]

Stop the press, did you say something positive?!

[red]No, I said something sarcastic

This is a tag team match is set for one fall! Introducing first, the team of Robbie Bourbon and Bearded War Pig..........The Motherfuckers!

They walk to the ring, chanting USA and spitting tobacco.





And their opponents, the team of Cris Valerius and Finn Kuhn..........VeryCoon!

They walk to the ring.


Valerius is set to begin against the Universal Champion, Robbie Bourbon. The two circle as Bourbon blows a kiss at Valerius, seemingly enraging him. He charges Robbie, but Robbie side steps, lifting him and throwing him into the corner. He begins to fire shots off to the midsection and face of Valerius, picking his spots. After about 10 shots, he whips him into the other turnbuckle and flattens him with a splash.

Very tactical early approach here from the Uni Champ. Methodically taking the young rookie apart.

Valerius stumbles out into the middle of the ring where Robbie hits him with a scoop slam. He tags in War Pig who immediately begins stomping on Valerius. He lifts him up by the head and goes for a massive uppercut, but Val ducks it, gets a thumb to the eye and bounces off the ropes, hitting BWP with a shoulder block and taking him down. He stumbles over to Finn, who he tags in. Kuhn goes up top. War Pig is just getting to his feet when Kuhn comes off the top rope with a missile drop kick into a small package pin!


1






















2














War Pig powers out.

Kuhn almost stole one there!

He is gonna need more than that. War Pig is a baaaaaddddd man.

Kuhn stays on the attack and comes off the ropes again but BWP catches him with a spinning power slam and drops him to the mat. He yells out and throws and arm up, the muscles in his neck flexing. He points to Robbie who gives him an emphatic thumbs down. Just then, Valerius pulls Robbie off the apron and begins to chop him on the outside. This momentary distraction is enough for Finn to roll up BWP again.


1


















2






















3-----BWP kicks out!

Almost another steal there!

Fuckin' cheater

BWP sits up and Kuhn comes off the ropes with a standing drop kick. He goes up top and throws his arms up. The crowd goes nuts for this as he jumps off landing a massive 450 splash!

On the outside Robbie has over powered Valerius, and whips him back first into the ring steps. He sees the splash and Kuhn covering again.















1





















2











Robbie breaks up the count with a kick to the back of the head of Finn.

What a save there from Robbie. That was the ballgame, folks!

Motherfuckers have to stick together!

Valerius crawls back under the ropes and grabs a hold of Robbie's leg. He tries to shake him off like you would a small dog on your pant leg. Kuhn is firing away on War Pig in the corner. All hell has broken loose!

Kuhn attemps snake eyes. He tight rope walks the top rope with BWP's arm in a twisted motion, but Robbie throws Valerius into the ropes, knocking Kuhn off balance. He stratles the ropes as the crowd goes "OOOOHHHHHHH"

Well, so much for extending the master race! Kuhn will be lucky to be pissing anything but blood!

Robbie kicks him in the side of the head and he tumbles over the ropes. Robbie shoves Valerius into BWP who hits him with a massive kick to the face followed by a kick to the gut by Robbie on the spin around...........................


ROBBIEBOMB



Robbie rolls out of the ring.........

BWP covers but the ref doesn't count.

Finn Kuhn is the legal man! Robbie shakes is head. He goes out of the ring and grabs Finn, rolling him into the ring. He grabs Finns arm and slaps Valerius back. Then he tosses him back over the ropes.

Is that a legal tag? Can he do that?

The ref shurgs and gets in position.

I guess so!


1


























2








































3

Winners: BWP and Robbie Bourbon--The Motherfuckers

Tig O Bitties: Here are your winners, by pinfall.......The Motherfuckers!

They stand in the ring with their arms up.

Bourbon and Pig made light work of two talented up and coming rookies. They have to be deep into consideration for the Tag Titles with this dominant win!

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It's main event time and I gotta say, it's had one of the weirdest builds of any main event we've had in quite some time.

Weird is one way to put it. Jenny and The Engineer have spent the last week...flirting??....with each other. At any rate it's champion versus champion right now!

The following match is set for one fall and will be contested under Xtreme rules with the Xtreme championship on the line! Introducing first, the challenger she hails from Las Vegas, Nevada and weighs in at 100 pounds, the XWF Bombshell champion.....JENNY MYST!





Jenny enters the arena when the Drums hit for the first time in her entrance music, Around the 20 second mark. She is usually taunting the fans or pretending to give high fives and the pulling away at the last moment with a sarcastic smirk and an eye roll. When she gets to the ring she slides under the bottom rope and playfully dips herself over the top rope, wearing her trademark evil grin.

And the champion, he hails from parts unknown and weighs in at 204 pounds, THE.....

Just then, a member of the ringside crew flags Tigg over. She looks confused but obliges. She's handed a card and she reads it, while Jenny stands by looking annoyed and pacing. Tigg quirks an eyebrow and returns to the center of the ring.

I have just been informed that The Engineer has banned his own manager, Madison Dyson from ringside...

Jenny starts laughing and clapping her hands.

...and that we will be treated to a live musical introduction of the champ dedicated to Jenny Myst by.....SEAL!!

Grammy award winning artist and possible burn victim Seal walks out onto the ramp. He starts singing his chart topping single Crazy, but it's a little muffled because he's wearing a paper bag over his head with eye and mouth holes cut out.





What the fuck?

Finally, The Engineer appears at the top of the ramp carrying a single black rose and he's got a wide smile on his face. He wastes no time getting to the ring and he hands the rose to Jenny. Jenny takes it and gives it a smell. She smiles back at Engy and turns to the ringside crew.

Jenny Myst: Hey, one of you assholes put this in some water for me.

Jenny hands the rose off and turns to Engy.

Jenny Myst: Let's do this.

Jenny winks at Engy and Engy claps his hands together expectantly, looking pleased as a pig in shit. Seal winds down his song and the bell rings, kicking off the main event!

We are finally underway!

Jenny and Engy lock up in the center of the ring, Engy quickly gets an advantage thanks to his size advantage and pushes Jenny back into the corner, but backs off. Jenny wastes no time capatilizing, roaring out of the corner with a big time spinning heel kick for the champs face. Engy hits the mat but immediately scampers to his feet, chuckling at Jenny and forcing her into another lock up, followed by a snap mare takedown. But then, Engy backs off again!

What's this crap, I thought he said he wasn't pulling any punches? These people paid good money to see Jenny Myst get her face caved in.

Jenny seems to notice the kid gloves too, she shakes her head and makes a WTF face. She lobs a punch at Engy, but he blocks it and chains that into a go behind wrist lock. Jenny back elbows him in the face and runs to the ropes, hitting Engy with a cross body block on the way back. She covers the champ...

1....NO, Engy kicks out!

While he may be taking it a little easy on her after all, he's not gonna hand her the title like that!

Engy gets up and Jenny scouts him, going for a chop block to his knee, which hits Engy stumbles into the corner and Jenny hits him with a shoulder block to the gut. She then mounts the turnbuckle next to him and tries to bulldog him from the turnbuckle, but Engy shoves her off, causing her to land hard in the middle of the ring. Engy then picks her up for a slam and delivers it, but instead of covering her he looks apologetic?!

Come on dude, really? He's gonna lose this match if he doesn't nut up.

Jenny takes advantage of Engy's hesitation but pulling him down into a small package!

1...


2...ENGY KICKS OUT!

Once they both get vertical, they lock up once again, but Jenny quickly turns it into a european upperut, followed by a serious of hard chops to Engy's chest. Engy counters with a knee lift to Jenny'd misection before tossing her through the ropes and out onto the floor.

Now maybe the action will pick up.

The champ follows her out as Myst scrambles to her feet. Engy goes to grab a folding chair from ringside....but then he shakes his head “no” and puts it down! Some of the ringside fans actually boo when he does this. An unarmed champion walks towards Jenny, but she baits him into a drop toe hold causing him to bash his face on the floor! Jenny winces and gets up, also eying some of the weapons at ringside, but she too seems to hesitate.

What the same hill is going on here?

Worst Xtreme match ever.

Jenny turns back on Engy, who is up and at 'em. She boots him in the midsection and wraps his head up for a DDT, but Engy shoves her away and then clotheslines her down. After that...he rolls her back in the ring?! The fans boo! Engy shrugs at them and mouths “Sorry!” before following Jenny back in the ring.

Jenny gets to a neutral corner and runs at Engy, faking him out by diving into a roll, bouncing up to her feet and tagging him with a dropkick to the chest. Engy falls. Jenny leaps in for an elbow drop but the champ rolls out of the way, kipping up to his feet and hitting Jenny with a hip tossm which he then chains into a headlock. Jenny reaches back, poking Engy in the eye to escape. They then both lock up again and Engy presses the advantage into a suplex on Jenny. Jenny ries out in pain when she lands, drawing a wince of sympathy from the champ. But nonetheless, he leaps on her for a cover.

1...


2...JENNY POPS THE SHOULDER UP!

Engy forces Jenny up and chops her chest, reddening it. Jenny again calls out in pain, but Engy chops her again, and then stops to say he's sorry. Jenny mutters something under her breath and she punches Engy in the head! Then again, and again! Jenny then whips Engy into the corner, running at him and hitting him hard with a running butt splash! The champ slumps in the corner, so Jenny does another pass, running in with a leaping face wash, making Engy kiss the bottom of her boot! Jenny pulls Engy out of the corner by the foot and looks like she's gonna hook the leg for a cover, but Engy kicks her away, gets to his knees, and then sweeps Jenny's legs out from under her with his arm. He forces her shoulders down to the canvas for a clumsy pin.

1...

2...JENNY KICKS OUT!

Not much of a pin attempt there. The champ is giving Jenny Myst way too many openings here, he needs to get serious.

Jenny slaps Engy again to get away from him, skittering away and pulling herself up in the corner. She retreats to the ring apron and Engy gives chase, but Jenny pulls the rope down and Engy goes up and over, tumbling to the outside! Once Engy is up, Jenny runs along the ring apron and into a big time body splash! She covers!

1...

2...ENGY PUSHES JENNY OFF!

Jenny slaps her hand on the floor, looking a bit frustrated. She grabs Engy up by his shirt, mouths “Sorry, but I want this!” and throws him into the ring steps! Engy grunts in pain as the steps clatter under his weight. Jenny then tears the ring bell away from the time keeper!

Oh God FINALLY!

Jenny moves on Engy, lifting the ring bell above her head to clock him with it, but Engy counters by punching her in the gut, forcing her to drop it. Engy picks up the bell...and tosses it away!

Dumbass!

Engy throws Jenny against the crowd control barricade, picks her up and then throws her against the ring. Jenny, angered by the pain, roars back and punches Engy in the head again and again, ending the flurry of blows once she drops him. She then starts dragging over the ring steps over to Engy. She grabs Engy by the back of his head and slams his skull into the steps! Jenny then gets on top of the steps and stomps down on his head as it lays on the unforgiving steel a few times for good measure!

The champ looks like he's in trouble, rolling off the steps in a daze. Jenny pulls him up into a grapple and nails him with a big time DDT on the floor! She covers!

1...


2...


3...NO! ENGY JUST BARELY SQUEAKS OUT!

Jenny, looking frustrated, gets Engy up again, but Engy pushes her away. Engy rolls himself back into the ring, trying to get some distance in between himself and his love, but he looks out of it. Jenny, smelling blood, rolls in after him and crawls to the top rope.

Engy doesn't look like he quite knows where he is! Jenny is sizing him up.

Wait, wait what's he doing?

Jenny takes flight, but Engy wheels on her with a quickness and tags her in the face! Jenny crumples hard and appears to be busted open!

What just happened?! She's bleeding!

Engy falls into the corner, smiling devilishly. He's got brass knuckles on!

Hahahahaha! He suckered her! He's been playing her!

Or did his survival instincts just kick in?! It may not matter, he's played around so much in this match he may not have much left!

But just look at Jenny!

Jenny, miraculously still conscious, looks up and sees her own blood dripping on the canvas. Her expression goes from shock to realization, and then anger! She looks up at Engy hatefully. He's on his feet now and he shrugs playfully. He winds up as Jenny gets up, looking to clock her with the knucks again, but Jenny ducks under and punches Engy square in the balls!

FUCK!

Engy holds himself, spittle flying as he bellows out the curse.

The romance could be over here!

Jenny downs the champ with a knee lift, but seems to lose her footing in the process, clearly still feeling the effects of the knux shot. Both she and the Engineer seem to regain their senses about the same time. Jenny, eyeing the knucks, keeps her distance and Engy pursues her, finally grabbing her hair and throwing her to the mat by it. He mounts her and cracks her in the face again with the knucks! Jenny screams and gouges his eyes in desperation, throwing him off her! Engy flails wildly, blinded by the eye gouge. Jenny spits blood and struggles up, she gestures for the Pink Perfection! She goes for it, but loses her balance at the last second and Engy grabs her by the waist and suplexes her! He bridges into a pin!

1...


2...


3...NO! JENNY KICKS OUT!

She's been hit by two brass knuckle shots, you have to admire her toughness!!

But Engy still seems to be having trouble seeing. Jenny is very slow to get up, allowing him some time to recover. Both competitors find themselves vertical, but Jenny I definitely looking like she's experiencing some vertigo.

This one could go either way!

Wait a minute, hold the phone, cuz! Who's that on the way to the ring now?


Th crowd pops as the imposing form of Mercy runs down the aisle toward the ring. Sh has in her hands a SOLID STEEL folding chair, and as she clambers up onto the apron behind Jenny Myst, she holds it over her head and waits for the Bombshell Champion to back up closer to her.

Myst must have eyes in the back of her head!


Jenny Myst indeed spins around just as she back towards the ropes, and she sees Mercy standing there with a chair raised up and poised to strike! Myst quickly drives a hard boot to Mercy's gut through the ring ropes, and Mercy flies off of the apron and crashes to the floor!

OH SHIT! She dropped that chair in the ring! Engy's got that thing and he's gone to the top! Ol' Girl better use that sixth sense one more time!


But after taking a little too long to trash talk the fallen Mercy, who by now has gotten to her feet and started backing away back up the entrance ramp holding her ribs, Jenny Myst turns back to the center of the ring and...








Holy shit!



The Engineer flies off of the top turnbuckle with a double head stomp, slipping the steel chair beneath his feet just before making contact with Jenny Myst's skull! Jenny Myst's lights go out and she falls limp to the mat as Engy, still seeming to have trouble with his vision, crawls over her for a pin!













1!


























2!
































3!!!!!!

Winner and STILL XWF X-Treme Champion - THE ENGINEER!

The Engineer has successfully defended against a tough and unwavering Jenny Myst in one of the strangest main events we've seen in a while.

The ref raises the Engineer's hand, but his eyes have never left Jenny. He goes to her, kneeling at her side. He puts one of her arms over his shoulder and helps her to her feet.

Maybe there's still some love there after all. Twisted as it is.

The Engineer steadies Jenny, allowing her to rest against his body.

Its okay, love. I got ya. Engy's got ya.

But then, he suddenly forces Jenny's head between his legs! He lifts her up and drops her thunderously on the back of her head with the Delirium Tremens!

You spoke too soon! What a goddamn snake!

Jenny is out cold! Engy calls for a mic and gets one quickly.

Sorry Jenny. But the truth is, you were NEVER good enough for me. Psyche, bitch!

Laughing callously, he dumps the mic on her prostrate form as his music hits. He steps onto her body, wiping his shoes on her and then casually walks out of the ring.

Oh how tasteless! Jenny left it all in that ring!

Including her dignity it turns out. Engy just plain outsmarted her.


EMTs rush to ringside to tend to Jenny Myst as the Engineer gathers up his X-Treme Championship and hustles toward the backstage area... befor he can get all the way up the ramp, however...






The crowd cheers as XWF Owner and Megastar "Loverboy" Vinnie Lane emergs from behind the curtain in a hot pink tuxedo and matching bandanna. He stands at the top of the ramp waiting for the crowd to die down with a smile on his face as Engy slows down, carefully approaching the man who once tried to screw him out of his King of the Ring title.


"Dude, relax."


Vinnie says to a resouding pop. He takes a step toards the Engineer, keeping one hand behind his back.


"I'm not here to do any more damage to your career... that was my bad, last time, dude. You earned your spot and you earned your crown, and I'm man enough to say it to your face... I WAS WRONG."



The crowd applauds the showmanship, but Engy still seems unimpressed, shouting somethnig unintelligible and spitting as he does it.

Vinnie wipes a hand down his face and grimaces as he shakes Engy's saliva off of his hand.


"Well, I was wrong about you deserving the crown anyway. You totally earned it. I was NOT wrong about you being a terrible example for this company, as you just proved yet again by literally spitting right in my face, dude! But, in the words of our lord and savior Peter Gilmour, I digress. I didn't come out here to dress you down again, I came here to reward you."


Confused silence rolls over the audience. Even the Engineer seems unsure of what's going on, or whether he can trust what he hears.


"See man, tonight, you achieved something very, very few people in the XWF ever achieve. Hell, I never even did it, and I'm the greatest Champion the XWF has ever seen! So congratulations, dude, for passing a milestone as X-Treme Champion... even though I'm, again, totally hesitant to give you this accolade, you did earn it fair and square... so, here you go dude!"



Then, Vinnie pulls his other hand out from behind his back, and shows it to be holding...





Oh snap! The Engineer has earned a 24/7 briefcase for his X-Treme Title tenure!


TWO Briefcases active in XWF at the same time? Robbie Bourbon is a marked man!


The only question now is, who uses theirs first, Engy or Caedus? And will the other one follow right up with a cash in of his own??



The Engineer hurries toward Vinnie and grabs the briefcase in a big embrace, actually dropping his X-Treme Championship in the process. He grips it tight with a bizarre smile on his face as Vinnie backs away slowly, vanishing back behind the curtain.


X-Treme Champion... King of the Ring... and now 24/7 Briefcase holder! What a year for the Engineer!


And what a nightmare for Robbie Bourbon! That's all we've got time for this time, folks! See you in two weeks when we drop bombs once again for XWF WEDNESDAY NIGHT WARFARE!!!!


The scene fades to black as Engy continues to hug and kiss his shiny new briefcase.

Special thanks to: Jim Caedus The Engineer BWP Chris Chaos Robert Main

Jenny is limping out of the arena, her bag over her shoulder. She is wincing and looks pretty banged up from her war with Engy. She is trying to exit the arena as quick as possible when a young kid, probably an intern of the Sayor's hoard, came running up behind her.

"Ms. Myst, Ms. Myst! Glad to see you are okay! You went through hell out there."

She looked at the kid with a scowl and kept walking.

"Jenny! One quick thing......just wanna get your thoughts."

The scowl continues.

"Well you came up just short of winning the X-Treme title tonight....but it was a heck of a match. What are next in your plans?!"

She blows out a puff of air and a bit of a snort.

"Listen here, you little snot, that wasn't even part of the plan. Engy was a side dish. I can't control booking and what booking does. The plan is still in fruition. I still plan to execute it to perfection. Engy got lucky tonight, but he isn't my concern."

"So you don't love him?"

"Really?"

"Sorry."

"Listen. I have places to be. My limo is waiting. Just know this......there are about to be BIG changes around here. You can smell it in the air. You can feel it in the atmosphere. Something big is about to happen........but I am not giving the news to a gelled hair little college dweeb like you......so go tell your boss next time he wants and exclusive he better come to me himself."

She pats him on the cheek with a smile as she walks through the exit doors with a ginger step.

Once again, Jenny Myst fails to be at all humbled by a loss, learns nothing, and goes on thinking she's queen shit despite all evidence to the contrary.

This is why everyone hates you. This is why I'm better than you.

"Damn those Motherfuckers are just tallying up the wins, all three of us competed and we all won! The Kings better watch their asses is all I am saying. Congratulations to my brother in arms Engy on his championship defense and winning a twenty-four, seven briefcase. Drinks on me broheem."

ooc: Damn, I missed these results until now...goddamn holiday hectic bullshit. Absolutely kickass card fam, the match quality (with the exception of the one I wrote lol) was incredibly high and kudos and a thank you specifically to the writer of the Corey-Caedus match, that shit was fuckin' badass!

ooc: You're welcome Jimmy crack corn!

Ooc: XD you da shit BDubsy