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+--- Thread: Feedback Request: Am I hitting the mark? (/showthread.php?tid=23028)
Am I hitting the mark? - Travis McCoy - 03-04-2016
So being new here I'd love a bit of feedback on the stuff I've posted so far. Links in chronological order.
I'm not sure if it's kosher to give feedback on promo's that are up to be considered for a match that hasn't happened yet but the last two are for my match with Branden. The last one being the one I feel the best about so far.
Little rusty and I feel like that one is the closest to the kind of work I want to produce for you guys.
I don't write novels of promos. That might kind of hurt me here but my stuff tends to be pretty short in comparison to most of you guys.
If you don't want to read them all then just check out the last one
http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=22975
http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=22993
http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=23013
http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=23020
After this I'll probably keep my feedback requests to a minimum but I was just curious what everyone was thinking so far.
Am I hitting the mark? - Vincent Lane - 03-04-2016
Being shorter can hurt, but only because it limits what you can really say. If I spend 2000 words beating you up and your entire promo is 750, you can't match me in most cases.
Now, that's not to say that writing super long shit is the way to go. It's not needed in most cases, but there are definitely some who will have that advantage. One way to maybe rectify that is to combine promos to double the size - instead of having 6, just have 3. Kind of the opposite advice I usually give the long-winded types (general consensus is that 2000-3000 words is about as big as you want to go.)
For you I think the easiest way to beef it all up is with some more scene and background. Your stuff is mostly dialogue, which is fine, but it could use some meat in the scenery department to give me a clear iea of what this guy's life is.
I liked the way he went right after his opponent and pissed on his parents' graves, that's some good heel shit. Gives a clear idea of the type of person he is.
Overall, I'd say you're above average. You'll get better and it will get easier once you settle in and you know the dynamic and the characters.
Am I hitting the mark? - Travis McCoy - 03-04-2016
Thanks man, length didnt matter at all where I was before. My promos were pretty average in length there. We had a guy as champion who wrote extremely short promos and no one really had a problem with it.
Combining stuff is a good idea.
I'm not against beefing up the scenery. It's something I can and will do, one of those promos had a decent little scene set.
I was worried once I started reading other people's stuff that not having a "gimmick" was going to hurt me. Seems like everyone here is pretty over the top and I'm not and never really have been.
Am I hitting the mark? - Vincent Lane - 03-04-2016
Gimmicks are a blessing and a curse, IMO. It gives you an identity but it also limits what you can do without breaking the rules you've set with the character.
With the blank slate you have, you can pretty much do whatever you want with Travis and it will make sense.
All that really will matter is how well it is written and how well you outdo your opponents. Like I said before, the length will only matter when you're up against someone who is producing the same quality of work as you are - obviously the guy with MORE quality work will win every time.
People are almost always willing to agree on limits here though.
Am I hitting the mark? - Travis McCoy - 03-04-2016
Good shit champ.
Appreciate you taking the time
Am I hitting the mark? - Mr Killjoy - 03-04-2016
Yeah what Lane said, try and hit 2000-3000 words, not much you can say in like a under 1000 words RP anyway, the quality of your trash talk is fine though, but add more character buildup, including some sort of story in your RPs is always good, especially if you can carry a story along in several RPs.
re:Am I hitting the mark? - Travis McCoy - 03-04-2016
(03-04-2016, 09:33 AM)"Mr FN Dominance Said: Yeah what Lane said, try and hit 2000-3000 words, not much you can say in like a under 1000 words RP anyway, the quality of your trash talk is fine though, but add more character buildup, including some sort of story in your RPs is always good, especially if you can carry a story along in several RPs.
I've always been wary of doing running stories through promo's, because I don't think everyone reads every promo. So a running story just feels like masturbation to me.
I could be wrong there.
Not saying I won't do it, because I've got plenty of stuff I could delve into.
re:Am I hitting the mark? - Chris MacBeth - 03-04-2016
(03-04-2016, 10:34 AM)Travis McCoy Said:(03-04-2016, 09:33 AM)"Mr FN Dominance Said: Yeah what Lane said, try and hit 2000-3000 words, not much you can say in like a under 1000 words RP anyway, the quality of your trash talk is fine though, but add more character buildup, including some sort of story in your RPs is always good, especially if you can carry a story along in several RPs.
I've always been wary of doing running stories through promo's, because I don't think everyone reads every promo. So a running story just feels like masturbation to me.
Best quote ever!
re:Am I hitting the mark? - Vincent Lane - 03-04-2016
(03-04-2016, 10:34 AM)Travis McCoy Said:(03-04-2016, 09:33 AM)"Mr FN Dominance Said: Yeah what Lane said, try and hit 2000-3000 words, not much you can say in like a under 1000 words RP anyway, the quality of your trash talk is fine though, but add more character buildup, including some sort of story in your RPs is always good, especially if you can carry a story along in several RPs.
I've always been wary of doing running stories through promo's, because I don't think everyone reads every promo. So a running story just feels like masturbation to me.
I could be wrong there.
Not saying I won't do it, because I've got plenty of stuff I could delve into.
I usually try to wrap up an arc in the same cycle for that same reason, though as long as you provide the proper links in the beginning it's not your problem if others don't get caught up.
Shane has a post regarding running stories for exactly that purpose, but I don't know exactly where it is. I'll try and find it and link it here.
Am I hitting the mark? - Vincent Lane - 03-04-2016
Here it is:
http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=20107