Bilbo Blumpkinz
I'm here for the bitches.
XWF FanBase: (.Awaiting user update)
(Where is my roster page?)
Joined: Tue May 02 2017
Posts: 133
44,157
Likes Given: 2
Likes Received: 94 in 57 posts
Hates Given: 40
Hates Received: 15 in 13 posts
Hates Given: 40
Hates Received: 15 in 13 posts
Reputation:
4
X-Bux: ✘81,055
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05-12-2022, 06:29 AM
Bilbo's scooter rams down the door of Thunder Knuckles' bathroom, where TK is sitting on the john trying to drop a grumpy like Amber Heard did on Edward Scissorhands' bed.
Bilbo steamrolls him and knocks the throne right off of its moorings, and TK and the toilet fall over to the side with a little geyser of water spraying up from the broken pipes. Bilbo keeps rolling until his extremely heavy mobility scooter is right on top of Thunder Knuckles, whose pants are still around his ankles.
"Hey dipshit. Did you know everyone in the XWF thinks you suck and might be a pedophile? Yeah. I don't know where the rumor started or where everyone got all those photos of you with that kid from The Goldbergs, but that's what everyone is saying. That's why no one even bothers trying to get the belt. They don't want to touch a pedophile. ALLEGED pedophile. Luckily for you I've been touching pedophiles since I was a kid so I'm here now to take your title. Why don't you just hand it over and go to OCW full time since they like pedophiles? They suck, you suck, it's a match made in heaven. Plus I'll get this belt back and people will respect it again. That's right, I get more respect than you. Look at me. I'm a survived abortion with eleven toes and a colostomy bag and I'm the one who gets respect. You got some pee puddling up by your face there, TK."
Bilbo points at the tile floor which has a big pond of wetness spreading out across it. Could be from the tank, but it could be from the bowl. No way to be sure.
"Anyway. Like I said, no one likes you except Bobby and Charlie and oh MAN is that something to really brag about? Even Graves pretends not to know you. GRAVES. If I were you I'd probably just stick my head down into that toilet bowl and inhale as much poopoo water as I could fill my lungs with, then pass over into the great beyond. We could change you name to the past tense. Thunder Knuckled. That's a nice gesture, right? Nicer than most pedos get. Are you Catholic?"
Bilbo blows a snot rocket onto TK and then presses a button on a universal remote that he apparently had in his pants the whole time. It looks sticky.
BZZZT
He presses the button and the robot referee called MARTY rolls into the room behind Bilbo. It looks the same as before but now has a big gold chain around its neck with a diamond encrusted dick and balls handing from the chain.
MARTY starts the count.
1!
2!
pin
See What LOSERS I Pinned Here!
- Pinned Your Mom
- Pinned Your Dad
- Pinned Your Cat
- Pinned Maverick in the bathroom repeatedly
- Pinning You Right Now
![](https://i.imgur.com/pUgtAVa.gif)
- Pinned Brutus the Barber Beefcake after a show in Orlando
- Planning on pinning your grandma after I exhume her dead ass
- Pinned Ghost Tank but who hasn't
- Pinned the tail on the donkey
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The following 1 user Likes Bilbo Blumpkinz's post:1 user Likes Bilbo Blumpkinz's post
Thunder Knuckles™ (05-12-2022)
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Thunder Knuckles™
A No Good Bastard
XWF FanBase: The 'cool' kliq fans (booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty while setting the trends)
XWF Roster Page
Joined: Thu Sep 12 2019
Posts: 564
321,140
Likes Given: 2,912
Likes Received: 1,455 in 399 posts
Hates Given: 78
Hates Received: 25 in 22 posts
Hates Given: 78
Hates Received: 25 in 22 posts
Reputation:
83
X-Bux: ✘723,270
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05-12-2022, 10:09 AM
TK kicks out knocking the handicapped monstrosity off his "legs", causing Bilbo's colostomy bag to act like a water balloon.
Goddamn, if it isn't the byproduct of a failed Roxi Cotton abortion.
A voice can be heard from the next stall over.
Speaking of abortions...
TK, who really needs to take a shit, replies.
That's a terrible segway for what you're obviously about to do.
The toilet in the next stall flushes.
You're probably right, what about Shay?
TK ignores the name and walks over to the only other stall that is currently being used.
OH, COME ON! Sounds like a stripper's name. You love strippers!
Will you hurry the fuck up! I have to take a shit and crippy boy knocked over this toilet!
Charlie pauses for a minute before the smooth sounds of diarrhea hitting water are heard.
Sorry, Tee-Kay, I ate a lot of Taco Bell. That was a courteous flush at best.
TK, in a panic, takes the only course of action that seems to feel right. With his pants still by his ankles, TK walks back over and takes a giant shit on the leftover S H A N E C A R V E R era talent, known as Bilbo Blumpkinz.
So, Shay, what do you think?
NO! How many times do I have to fucking say it?
Tk wipes his ass and tosses it on Bilbo. As if nothing happened TK goes to wash his hands.
I'll think of a name.
TK leaves the bathroom not saying another word.
Oh, How about Skyla?
Charlie pauses again to violently squirt out more watery shit.
Tee-Kay? Skyla? Are you there?
Another pause and more of Charlie's diarrhea can be heard making contact with the water.
Yeah, he's gone.
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The following 3 users Like Thunder Knuckles™'s post:3 users Like Thunder Knuckles™'s post
"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (05-12-2022), Charlie Nickles (05-12-2022), Marf (05-12-2022)
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Marf
THE Marf
XWF FanBase: Very random (heel alignment but liked by many; has earned respect despite breaking the rules often)
XWF Roster Page
Joined: Mon Oct 12 2020
Posts: 292
200,990
Likes Given: 1,505
Likes Received: 757 in 251 posts
Hates Given: 19
Hates Received: 8 in 8 posts
Hates Given: 19
Hates Received: 8 in 8 posts
Reputation:
67
X-Bux: ✘36,727
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11-28-2022, 05:26 PM
The fuck ever happened to this dude?
2x Xtreme Champion
2x Television Champion
2x Freestyle Champion
5x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Member of Charlie’s Carnies
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Jenny Myst
The Queen of X-Treme
XWF FanBase: Very random (heel alignment but liked by many; has earned respect despite breaking the rules often)
XWF Roster Page
Joined: Thu Apr 06 2017
Posts: 627
621,363
Likes Given: 146
Likes Received: 833 in 367 posts
Hates Given: 9
Hates Received: 60 in 55 posts
Hates Given: 9
Hates Received: 60 in 55 posts
Reputation:
30
X-Bux: ✘93,741
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11-28-2022, 05:39 PM
Died.
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