I know that a majority of people do not comment on feedback post, but I need to know everyone's opinion of my lastest RP memories on the Saturday Shove It Board. I'm going a new direction with my character and really need to know peoples opinions of it. Likes or dislikes it will help me decide.if I want to progress her further in this manner if just find a different rout for her. There is a twist at the end I'm hoping will catch some readers off guard. Thanks.

Amber

I thought it was good, as usual. And the twist...was well done...! My only comment is that maybe, perhaps you should've saved it up a little longer, dropped hints and then thrown the swerve...? Because that was a big revelation.

Also, I was thinking, maybe something that could add spookiness to the whole youth deal with her, and be a part of this edge she has, is if maybe she found herself addicted to looking at violent pictures or something like that, or some sort of wholly morbid fixation...?

To me, I'm impressed when Wild comes off so...evil/sociopathic/sick that you're actually turned off, even though you realize she's this hot woman.

My other thought is that, you know, any old guy might have Hustler. But, if he had something that only a serial killer would have, that could fixate Wild...some artifact of what he was, that she kept, as a kid, be it drawings, a journal, whatever...?

All great advice and I thank you for that. The artifact idea would have been genious, and I did want to save the revealing of Michelle being a split personality but felt I had to introduce it early before someone used her thinking she was a real character whether it be in passing or whatever. Thanks though I love negative feedback it always helps for the next time I write and the artifact idea I might be able to use.

Well, my overall feedback is that it was an awesome post. And it was one of the best swerves I've read in a post.

And she definitely did come off mean as crap, as well. She's gotta be hard to write...cause dang, she is MEAN!

It is very difficult to write I won't lie. I have never written dark RPs but I wanted to do something different with her this time around I wanted to step out of my comfort zone and not be safe really challenge myself and my writing. Just glad someone is enjoying it pushes me to do better with everyone I write.