Brian Braxton
Guest
XWF FanBase: (.Awaiting user update)
(Where is my roster page?)
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05-20-2013, 09:52 AM
This is my first e-fed and I wanted to know what everyone thinks of my promos. i'm not quite sure if thy're substance justifies they're length.
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KnightMask
One half of Crimson Knights
XWF FanBase: Some of everyone (cheered; very rarely plays dirty; many likable qualities)
(Where is my roster page?)
Joined: Tue Feb 19 2013
Posts: 205
101,868
Likes Given: 80
Likes Received: 97 in 67 posts
Hates Given: 0
Hates Received: 0 in 0 posts
Hates Given: 0
Hates Received: 0 in 0 posts
Reputation:
32
X-Bux: ✘0
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05-20-2013, 01:38 PM
They're good, but what I personally would like, and maybe this is just me, but a little more about Brian Braxton's actions. Like, show him doing some stuff. I feel like, by seeing him do stuff, I can figure out something about what kind of guy he is more so. How much of an a-hole or a nice guy he is, etc.
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Steve "KingSlayer" Davids
Steve Davids
XWF FanBase: Teens, some men, few kids (booed by casual fans; hurts people; often angry)
XWF Roster Page
Joined: Wed Mar 13 2013
Posts: 960
228,880
Likes Given: 403
Likes Received: 476 in 281 posts
Hates Given: 14
Hates Received: 17 in 15 posts
Hates Given: 14
Hates Received: 17 in 15 posts
Reputation:
56
X-Bux: ✘0
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05-20-2013, 01:44 PM
I agree with KnightMask, i don't feel like I know your character well enough from your early RPs. You just need to get his personality and attributes across in your description more.
3x Xtreme Champion
1x Briefcase Holder
1x Television Champion
1x Universal Champion
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Sebastian Duke
Registered but either hasn't added self to a roster yet or doesn't RP
XWF FanBase: Very random (heel alignment but liked by many; has earned respect despite breaking the rules often)
(Where is my roster page?)
Joined: Tue Jan 01 2013
Posts: 924
479,583
Likes Given: 55
Likes Received: 74 in 20 posts
Hates Given: 5
Hates Received: 1 in 1 posts
Hates Given: 5
Hates Received: 1 in 1 posts
Reputation:
9
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05-20-2013, 01:45 PM
First e-fed? They're excellent in that case. Let me add to my buddy KM up there. This is something someone told me when I first came in (Looking at you, Soldier.): Read others roleplays. Start with the "top guys." Look at what they do. Read as much as you can.
You're not even really off the mark. For a first time, they're very very good.
Develop a story centered around Braxton outside of the ring. How he interacts with others. How you reacts to others. Does he have friends? Is he a loner? What makes Brian Braxton tick?
You're already off to a solid start. Keep your eyes peeled and your ears open and you'll go far.
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Steve "KingSlayer" Davids
Steve Davids
XWF FanBase: Teens, some men, few kids (booed by casual fans; hurts people; often angry)
XWF Roster Page
Joined: Wed Mar 13 2013
Posts: 960
228,880
Likes Given: 403
Likes Received: 476 in 281 posts
Hates Given: 14
Hates Received: 17 in 15 posts
Hates Given: 14
Hates Received: 17 in 15 posts
Reputation:
56
X-Bux: ✘0
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05-20-2013, 01:47 PM
(05-20-2013, 01:45 PM)Sebastian Duke Said: First e-fed? They're excellent in that case. Let me add to my buddy KM up there. This is something someone told me when I first came in (Looking at you, Soldier.): Read others roleplays. Start with the "top guys." Look at what they do. Read as much as you can.
You're not even really off the mark. For a first time, they're very very good.
Develop a story centered around Braxton outside of the ring. How he interacts with others. How you reacts to others. Does he have friends? Is he a loner? What makes Brian Braxton tick?
You're already off to a solid start. Keep your eyes peeled and your ears open and you'll go far.
Agree with this, there's no better way of improving your RPs than reading other people's work. It will help creatively A LOT!
3x Xtreme Champion
1x Briefcase Holder
1x Television Champion
1x Universal Champion
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