It's Christmas on Anarchy!

Put your belts under the tree!

Come opt in and you will see...

What Santa said your gifts shall be!

I am in.

American nightmare is in

"Which one of you Ho Ho Hos has something in their sack for me?"

Ready to roast some chestnuts or however that song goes.

I’m in

In.

Don’t mind if i…do?

Count The Bit luchador in

Barney and Bob are in for a tag match if possible. Otherwise, Just use Barney Green. Will post Bob's stats tonight.

Give me Samael.

Love Bites is in

(11-24-2025, 07:59 PM)The Director Said: Give me Samael.

Hey Director, Sam Dyson here. First of all: no.

Second of all: eat my entire asshole.

THE JUICER WILL ONCE AGAIN FLEX.

" Your 2025 Hall of Legends member will exercise his legends contract and select either the Bit Luchador or Hixx (Love bites?) as their opponent. I won't even activate the Freebird Rule for this one. Merry Christmas... Your gift this year is seeing me in action for the first and only time."

In.

(11-26-2025, 04:02 PM)PrestonVE Said: " Your 2025 Hall of Legends member will exercise his legends contract and select either the Bit Luchador or Hixx (Love bites?) as their opponent. I won't even activate the Freebird Rule for this one. Merry Christmas... Your gift this year is seeing me in action for the first and only time."

"Hey, buddy... just a super chill FYI here. Your statues and any trace of you has been removed from the Hall of Legends. Super weird, don't know what happened there. But one of your statues is currently being used to hold Tommy Gunn's hats in the Kingsguard barracks. You're welcome to come get it. But you might want to reconsider your Freebird thoughts... because I have A LOT of Kingsguard..."

(11-26-2025, 07:29 PM)King Kieran Said:

(11-26-2025, 04:02 PM)PrestonVE Said: " Your 2025 Hall of Legends member will exercise his legends contract and select either the Bit Luchador or Hixx (Love bites?) as their opponent. I won't even activate the Freebird Rule for this one. Merry Christmas... Your gift this year is seeing me in action for the first and only time."

"Hey, buddy... just a super chill FYI here. Your statues and any trace of you has been removed from the Hall of Legends. Super weird, don't know what happened there. But one of your statues is currently being used to hold Tommy Gunn's hats in the Kingsguard barracks. You're welcome to come get it. But you might want to reconsider your Freebird thoughts... because I have A LOT of Kingsguard..."

"I was indeed alerted about an incident involving my Hall of Legends statue and etcetera. Thankfully I'm friends with the Trillionaires. You know them, right? The ones you tried to over rule, outplay, outsmart. The ones who put you in your place.  The ones who made you defend your crown at Wargames. The ones who engineered your downfall to Anorexic Andy at Wargames. Yeah, those guys are my friends and have told me they have resolved the issues regarding my statue and  etcetera. But hey nice try, an A for effort. If I were you I'd be calling out your daddy Dickie since he's gonna be on the card. Anyway watch me perform against Bit Luchador or Hixx. We will put on a show.

"Lemme get this straight... your strategy here is to claim allegiance to people that I don't like?"

(11-26-2025, 04:02 PM)PrestonVE Said: " Your 2025 Hall of Legends member will exercise his legends contract and select either the Bit Luchador or Hixx (Love bites?) as their opponent. I won't even activate the Freebird Rule for this one. Merry Christmas... Your gift this year is seeing me in action for the first and only time."

Remove Preston Vanderlay Esquire from the booking list please. Thanks.

Me and bro are in and we want the tag straps. Also everyone else here is pussies and they suck.

(11-25-2025, 01:20 PM)Kristoffer "Vamp" Arroyo Said:

(11-24-2025, 07:59 PM)The Director Said: Give me Samael.

Hey Director, Sam Dyson here. First of all: no.

Second of all: eat my entire asshole.

I see the asshole doesn’t fall far from the tree. Beat me once and that’s it? You don’t want to play anymore? Fucking pussy. I’m out for Anarchy then if this petulant child doesn’t want to fight me. 

(11-29-2025, 06:10 PM)Da Bing Bong Twinzz Said: Me and bro are in and we want the tag straps. Also everyone else here is pussies and they suck.

HOLLLLEEEEEE FUCK! The Bing Bong Twins?! I LOVE YOU GUYS! Your OnlyFans taught me how to properly snort cocaine using only my asshole! Boys, stay tuned because Clutchy baby and I are gonna have a segment on this show where we reveal when our first title defense is gonna be! In the mean time, maybe face Barney and Bob? I book matches now. 

As for The Director, I was trying to be a GOOD GUY and not publicly embarass the shit out of you again, but clearly you're too stupid to not look a gift horse in the mouth. Speaking of mouths, how did that puke taste, shithead? I bet some got in your mask.

How about I shove Barney up that ass? You ain't shit but a goth twerp, you corny as hell. Me and bro will defeat you easily and then slap Clutch in the titties. Would smash, btw.

(11-29-2025, 07:44 PM)Da Bing Bong Twinzz Said: How about I shove Barney up that ass? 

Don't tempt me with a good time!

G'day mates!

I reckon there's some good huntin' to be found in this here safari, so let me at 'em!

"While I know I will be in this Anarchy, let's make it interesting. 

Put me in the show, two times. Two matches. Hell. I'll do three. Dealer's choice of my opponents. 

It's the time for giving, and I'm in a giving mood. 

So let the greenhorns take a shot at me."

"And Special Guest STAR! Sir Lionel Pennyfarthing OBE!"

The camera flickers on.




















Red static…
























Then BAM, Micheal Graves’ ugly mug fills the frame.


He’s holed up in some abandoned storage unit that smells like piss, mold, and life decisions he absolutely does not regret but probably should.

A dying neon sign behind him just blinks “MEAT”, because of course it does.

”VINNIE! LOVERBOY!! YOU GLORIFIED HAIRSPRAY COMMERCIAL!!!
I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!!”

He coughs up chunky flim and wipes it on his cape.

”Been over a goddamn YEAR, dude! A YEAR!! They cut me open like a goddamn Christimas Taco, took my liver, my spleen, one of my nuts…” Graves grabs his junk and momentarily stares with concern. ”Still ain’t sure which one... everything feels lopsided now…” Eyes up! ”Anyway, they sold ‘em to some crypto bro who wanted to live forever. Joke’s on him, he exploded in Bali last week, saw it on TikTok!

But everything didn't come up Gravy over the past year...”

He kicks over a cardboard cutout of "Allegedly Micheal Graves" from his championship run that recently ended.

”While I’m out here stitching my asshole back together with dental floss, some MASK-STEALING COCKGOBLIN uses MY title shot to win MY belt, gets MORE over than me, then suddenly vanishes like a fart in church with ZERO payoff?? WHO BOOKS THIS SHIT, VINNIE?? YOU?? Because you know Goddamn well that I was saving that shot to user in the Age of Obscene—AND HE DID NOTHING WITH IT!”

He grabs the camera, pulling it close as the lens fogs from his breath.

”I’m BEGGING you, Lane. I’m on my knees here, and I'm not even sure I have kneecaps from the organ thing...

Gimme a contract. 

I’ll sign it in blood, piss, cum, whatever fluid I got left. 

I’ll even do the drug tests this time, promise I’ll only smoke the good devil weed now!”

Cut to Vinnie Lane in his office, feet up, eating Flaming Hot Cheetos, watching this on a monitor and laughing his balls off.

Vinnie (on speakerphone): Gravesy baby! Love the energy, dude! Real “return from the dead” vibes. Tell ya what, I’ll give you your contract… but Daddy Vinnie just needs three favors from you, cool? Cool.

“NAME IT, YOU GLORIOUS BASTARD!!!”

Vinnie: “One: You gotta wear the pink tutu in your first match back. That one from the charity show in 17. Yeah, the one with the glitter that never washes out.

Two: You gotta cut a promo apologizing to "Allegedly Micheal Graves, call him “Mask Daddy”, and thank him for keeping your seat warm.

Three: You’re wrestling in a Port-a-Potty Deathmatch. Loser gets flushed.

Literally. We rented one of those fancy Japanese toilets that sings and were just looking for an excuse!”

Graves just stares at the phone for a solid ten seconds. A single tear rolls down the mask, might actually be blood.

”…deal.”

Vinnie: “Atta boy!! Welcome home, you disgusting freak!”

Graves falls to his knees, overwhelmed with joy.

(now screaming) “YOU HEAR THAT ANARCHY?! 

I’M BACK, BITCHES!!! 

ORGANS OPTIONAL, SANITY SOLD SEPARATELY!!! 

I’LL WEAR THE FUCKING TUTU! 

I’LL CALL THAT MASK THIEF “DADDY”! 

I’LL SWIM IN SHIT IF I HAVE TO!! 

BECAUSE THE AGE OF FUCKIN' OBSCENE STARTS NOW!!!”

He grabs a rusty chain and wraps it tightly around his fist.

”Everyone's about to remember why they used to lock the doors when I walked backstage…

BTW, is Dolly Waters still doing the good-girl/bad-girl flip-flop? I’ll knee the indecision right out of her skull.”

He headbutts the camera.

Screen goes black.

The last thing you hear is maniacal laughter over the speaker phone, and Vinnie yelling “SOMEONE GET THIS MAN A CONTRACT AND A BOTTLE OF LYSOL!”

---

ooc: in for whatever