We open with a shot of Judge Judy seated on high. The camera slowly zooms out and we see two tables inside of a courtroom. DDS and their lawyer, Jim Jinsunero, sit at one table. Jim Jinsunero is still clearly reeling from The Continuum’s vicious attack, as he is confined to a wheelchair and his entire body is in a cast. The Heavymetalweight and Television championships sit on the DDS table atop a pile of disorganized papers and folders. There is an empty table across from DDS.

Judge Judy: ORDER! ORDER! ORDER!

Judge Judy bangs her gavel and all eyes turn towards her.

Judge Judy: Now I’m here today to listen to the case of DDS vs. The Continuum. Last time I was on XWF programming in 2017 all I remember was a bunch of scat everywhere and some man named Sid Feder coming into my court and ruining it! I swore I wouldn’t come back to this kangaroo court, but some guy in a blonde wig and a deep v-neck gave me a huge check to sit through this. So get on with it!

Judge Judy bangs her gavel once more. Jim Jimson steps up from his chair and wheels Jim Jinsunero out into the center of the courtroom.

Jim Jinsunero: Your honor…..we are here today asking you for judicial intervention to protect the integrity of this championship bout! The current tag team champions are making a mockery of our entire tag team division. The belt is supposed to be held by two men, not three! To let a third man who never earned the belts defend them is unconstitutional! Check it out! No section of the U.S., EU, or North Korean constitutions defend this type of behavior!

The tag team division is a battle between two teams of two! Tag team wrestling is a bitter war of one pair against another. One couple switching in and out, taking on another couple and really taking it to them! Giving that other couple all they got! Taking turns, swinging in and out of the ring, four people giving each other all they have to give! That's what tag team wrestling is about! Your honor, we're asking you to rule in favor of the plaintiffs and disbar Corey Smith from the match! Only you have the power to strike down the freebird rule!

But even further, your honor, The Continuum has resorted to violence when called out on this illegality! They put me through a table and BROKE EVERY BONE IN MY BODY! I CAN’T FEEL MY DICK! I CAN’T FEEL MY COCK! I CAN’T FEEEEEL MY PEEEEENIIIIIIIISSSSS!

Jim Jinsunero breaks down in tears. Inconsolable sobbing overtakes the man. Judge Judy rolls her eyes as she slams the gavel down.

Judge Judy: Get a hold of yourself! Get him out of here!

Jim Jimson rolls Jim Jinsunero back to the DDS table. As soon as Jinsunero’s back is to Judge Judy he immediately stops sobbing and winks at the camera.

Judge Judy: All right, time to hear from the defense! Counsel, step up to the plate and let me hear what you got!



Judge Judy looks around for a representative of the Continuum.

Judge Judy: What the hell is going on here?! Where are the defending champions?

Jim Jinsunero: The defense won’t show up! They won’t face their crimes! We have sent them notice after notice, subpoena after subpoena, for weeks! They’re no showers!

Judge Judy rolled her eyes at the clearly disorganized clown court.

Judge Judy: How am I supposed to have a trial without a defense?! Ugh. This is ridiculous.

Judge Judy rubs her forehead out of annoyance.

Judge Judy: Whatever, let’s just get on with this. Is there anyone out there that witnessed the alleged crime against the tag team belts? Does anyone want to come forward and voice their position on this matter? Speak now, or forever hold your grudge! We’ve got TV time to fill, folks!

Jim Jinsunero: Actually, it’s digital exclusive time…….we couldn't make the cut for the television program.

The camera turns to face you as Judge Judy waits for your words of wisdom.

The courtroom sits in silence. Eventually, Judge Judy pounds the gavel.

Judge Judy: Ok, enough is enough! You're not going to piss on my leg and tell me it's raining. Is this even a real trial? I don't care how much you pay me, I'm not going to sit here all week! No one showed for the defense or to be a witness! I'm ruling against the defendants because you smell like dolphin cum.

Judy pounds the gavel. DDS bitches, moans, and complains about the judging vs The Continuum as the camera fades to black.

This was a sham trial! A witch hunt! Tryna steal my tag belts using Judge god damn Judy!

#StopTheSteal #DemagogueDemos

#FreeTheFreebirds