If I could get some feedback on my stuff for Savage, primarily the third piece, that would be awesome. I wanted to add trash talk to the third rp, I planned to read Lux's third piece and do precisely that after I finished writing and coding the story but there was simply not enough room. By the counter I had enough space left to write something like... you smell bad Lux and your mom dresses you funny too (example, lol), so I only went with the story. Anyway I really wanted to get this story out and I'm just curious how it was received. Any thoughts or opinions, would be very much appreciated. Thanx in advance

http://xwf99.com/showthread.php?tid=33288 - Lost my match, don't care, congrets Lux, I just really wanted opinions on this piece.

I enjoyed your story. I found it well written and very novel-esque. My personal preferences are that I tend to have a bit of a distaste for "reply" style trash talk, where one person just fires back at whatever their opponent came at them with first rather than coming up with their own salvo to lead off with. I think of it like someone being dragged by a dog on a leash rather than being in control of the process. Outside of that, there was nothing really wrong with your writing here.