Saturday Night Savage opens to a huge eruption of pyro, fireworks explode up into the sky and then there is nothing other than complete darkness. Suddenly some words are written in white on the blackened titantron screen.
THINGS…ARE…ABOUT…TO…CHANGE…FOREVER!
As Tea For The Tillerman begins to play a familiar Englishman appears within the centre of the ring, a single beam of light emerges. The suited man is rugged but suave. He looks among the fans who aren’t sure whether to cheer or boo. His voice is husky and he looks around the sold out arena in awe.
“For those of you who don’t remember me, my name is Archie Lawson and I am the former General Manager of Wednesday Night Warfare. Well I have watched that show crumble before my very eyes as managers have come and gone. I missed the XWF so much and all of you people that I just had to come back. When I looked to return I had planned on wrestling once again, but I think this is where I belong. I want to make Savage reach new levels, alongside The Judge, we can dominate the XWF landscape and highlight just how bad Wednesday nights have become under the management of Frodo Smackins, a hobbit who struggles to manage himself, let alone a wrestling brand.”
The fans begin to chant “Savage” and Archie grins whilst nodding before continuing.
“Under my leadership, Saturday Night Savage will become the greatest show of all time and…”
Mike Stump: “That’s the god damn Intercontinental Champion, what the hell is he doing out here!? And why is he interrupting a new member of Savage management… How disrespectful is that!?”
The lights flicker on and off again before fog emerges, a separate beam of light emerges at the top of the stage highlighting Makaveli who is stood in all his glory. The Intercontinental Championship hangs over his shoulder as he slowly makes his way down the ramp before climbing into the ring. Both of the beams of light disappear and Archie Lawson stands toe to toe with Makaveli before backing away.
“If you came out here for a fight, you’ve come to the wrong guy.”
Makaveli lifts the microphone up to his lips, silencing the new GM.
“I’m not out here to fight you Arch, I’m here to introduce myself of sorts. I’m the Intercontinental Champion, the top dog in these parts. Do you understand? Well it doesn’t matter but you cannot make this show great just with the click of your fingers. Greatness follows champions and greatness follows me. Whichever show I compete on, that’s the show the people should be watching!”
Jeers and boos erupt from the crowd, Makaveli has got the crowd riled up and Archie Lawson seems to be enjoying it.
“It doesn’t matter though Arch, because this tin pot show couldn’t afford for me to wrestle on it because let’s face it… I’m too big for this show!”
“Is that so… MAK? Well you don’t have a choice because coming out here and interrupting me was your first mistake but claiming that we can’t afford you was the biggest one because you’ve just talked yourself into a match tonight. If you have a problem with that then I suggest you leave your Intercontinental Championship here because you’re competing in the main event unless you want to be stripped of that belt!”
The fans erupt into cheers and it seems Archie Lawson is trying to please the people.
“And your opponent tonight is none other than… OPHELIA MCVEIGH!!”
The crowd cheers, McVeigh has been a monster since joining the XWF!
“Oh and it will be an Xtreme Rulez match and it will be for YOUR INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP!!!! How’s that for greatness?”
Archie drops the microphone and looks Makaveli right in the eye who is furious! He is screaming at Archie Lawson who is walking up the ramp!
Mike Stump: Makaveli is furious but this crowd loves it. We’ve got ourselves a huge main event tonight and that’s not the only MASSIVE match we have in store for you because Robbie Bourbon goes one on one with the XWF Universal Champion… Vinnie Lane! What a show we have lined up for you here on Savage!
Kid Kool
- vs -
Niko LaVey
X-Treme Rules Match
2000 word limit |
The bell sounds and right off the bat Kid Kool, diving into Nico and punching him into the corner. Nico tries to break free with an overhead punch but Kool ducks and delivers a stinging chop to Nico's chest. Kool then delivers a standing drop kick to put Nico down. Suddenly the match comes to a halt as an object comes flying from the crowd and directly into Kid Kool's hand. It's a pen! Kool is known for handing out autographs mid-match so why should tonight be any different? Kool scribbles his name onto his knee pad, and then delivers a knee drop to the face of Nico with that same knee! Kool then removes the knee pad and tosses it back to the fan who wanted the autograph. Kool sizes up Nico, locks in on his target, and drops Nico with the Kid Kutter! (RKO) Kool pins Nico by resting a single arm over Nico's chest while posing like a model.
1
2
3!
Winner: Kid Kool
Shade
- vs -
Mystery Opponent
Xtreme Rulez |
We see Shade standing silently in the ring. Suddenly, a fan hops the ring barrier! He rushes the ring, and security is going crazy, scrambling to keep up! He gets into the ring, and Shade kicks him square in the testicles! He drops to a knee, and Shade rears into the corner and charges with a knee! He stands silently in the corner as security staff steps into the ring and escorts the mad fan out of there! As Shade stands silently, we hear L7's "Shitlist" hit the PA system in the arena.
Vanessa Gibson steps out into the entrance! Gibson marches down to the ring, pointing and screaming at Shade the entire time! She slides into the ring, and as she stands, Shade charges and delivers a clothesline from hell, finishing the Death Shoot in full and annihilating two people with it!
Shade covers....
One...
Two...
Kickout!
Vanessa Gibson barely kicks out! Shade calmly stands as Vanessa Gibson writhes on the mat! He goes to the corner and climbs...
DEATH SKIES!
Gaylord Cockshafer: That's gotta be the end of it, Stump!
Mike Stump: I agree, Gaylord, that sumersaulting double knee from the top is deadly to opponents standing or on the ground!
Shade goes for a pin...
One...
Two...
Three!
Gaylord Cockshafer: Oh my, with only two moves Shade has ended Vanessa Gibson's undefeated streak in the XWF!
Mike Stump: Shade is looming over the XWF, Gaylord!
Kristen Silver
- vs -
Madison Monroe
Xtreme Rulez to unify the Blue and Green High Stakes Chips |
Kristen and Madison look at each other from across the ring, and once the bell rings, they start for one another. They lock up and look at one another until Kristen opens with a knee to the gut of Monroe. Now that she has the upperhand, she grabs Monroe by the hair and begins to unleash a hellish flurry of forearms. Madison raises her hands and rakes Kristen's face, getting a breather, before pushing her backwards into the ropes, causing Silver to bounce off the ropes and back towards Monroe, who was waiting with a dropkick, causing Silver to fall, but she gets back up quickly. Monroe tries to bunch, but Silver has recovered from the rake and dropkick, and blocks the punch, then pushing the woman's arm away forcefully, making her spin around, and Silver tries to go for the quick finish, aiming to perform the Silver Lining!
Monroe had it scouted and she dropped to the ground and rolled out of the ring, to get some distance from Silver, who goes on the offensive! Madinson runs around the ring to avoid Silver, and then finally slides into the ring, and runs into one side of the ropes opposite of where Silver is sliding into the ring from, and just as Silver is about to get off the grounds and mid-stand, Madison hits her with an enziguri! Silver seems to be knocked out cold! Monroe pulls Silver away from the ropes, goes for a quick pin, and the ref slides in for the count!
ONE!
Silver kicks out right away, and Monroe begins to complain to the ref, then unleashes slap after slap upon Kristen's face! After the eighth slap, Monroe goes to stand, and more groggily Silver tries to get off the ground while Madison contemplates what to do.
She taunts the crowd while she takes a small breather, as they call out she's a bitch, and she agrees lets it known that she loves to be known as that!
However, her taunting allowed Silver to get her own breather, and she turns Madison around and begins to punch and kick all from different directions! Thighs, head, stomach, chest! She ends with a backhanded slap, which disorients Monroe, and she jumps up, wrapping her legs around Madison's head and swings her around via hurricanrana! She gets up quickly, while Silver tries to regroup herself on the ground.
BAD CALL!
Silver goes over to her, grabs her by the leg, and she slaps Monroe into a cloverleaf! This makes Madison begin to cry out as Silver begins to apply pressure upon Monroe's body!
Monroe has no choice... She taps out!!
What a win for Silver! She's on fire and now she holds both of the chips!
"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane
- vs -
Robbie Bourbon
Xtreme Rulez |
We go back ringside where we see Robbie Bourbon taking selfies with a group of fans holding a giant "Robby has a 'Y' in it!" sign.
"I Wanna Rock!"
The high pitched wail of Dee Snider pierces the air as the Twisted Sister classic pumps through the PA system. As two big pyro towers shoot off on either side of the stage, "Loverboy" Vinnie Lane spins out of the entrance ramp, wearing his favorite t-shirt, a cutoff Faster Pussycat screen print, long silver tights and shining silver boots. The crowd pops as Loverboy struts down the aisle, strumming the air guitar across Robbie Bourbon's pink slip and leaping into the air with a jumping split. As he hops onto the ring apron, he swings around, facing the crowd, and pumps his fist along to the music, singing along and inciting the crowd to do so as well.
On his way to the ring, he sharts, and grimmaces. Hurriedly, Vinnie Lane runs backstage, and his music stops. Robbie goes and poses with a group of fans holding a giant "We Got Loaded From Robbie's Jizz" sign, though not posing as inappropriately as you would think. Suddenly...
"I Wanna Rock!"
The high pitched wail of Dee Snider pierces the air as the Twisted Sister classic pumps through the PA system. As two big pyro towers shoot off on either side of the stage, "Loverboy" Vinnie Lane spins out of the entrance ramp, wearing his favorite t-shirt, a cutoff Faster Pussycat screen print, long silver tights and shining silver boots. The crowd pops as Loverboy struts down the aisle, strumming the air guitar across Robbie Bourbon's pink slip and leaping into the air with a jumping split. In doing so, he sharts, gets frustrated again, and hurries backstage.
Robbie is out in the crowd now, and he's posing with a group of fans holding a giant "ULTRAVIOLENCE" sign, and as he does...
"I Wanna Rock!"
The high pitched wail of Dee Snider pierces the air as the Twisted Sister classic pumps through the PA system. As two big pyro towers shoot off on either side of the stage, Robbie turns to watch the entrance ramp along with the fans. Suddenly, from behind him, Vinnie Lane comes from out of nowhere and nails him with a superkick, sending Robbie reeling!
Mike Stump: Oh shit, they're starting this one out in the crowd here!
Vinnie stalks Robbie and delivers a swift thigh kick. Another swift thigh kick. He then picks up a fan's cup of soda and smashes it over the back of Robbie's head, and then whips Robbie into the ring barrier from the side of the crowd! Robbie's back bends backwards as he hits the barricade, and Vinnie lands another solid superkick to Bourbon, sending him back over the guardrail and onto the floor ringside! Vinnie climbs into the ring and pulls out Robbie's pink slip, holding it high in the air as Robbie slowly gets to his feet. Vinnie shoots off the ropes, and vaults the top rope, looking to hit Bourbon with something high impact!
Bourbon catches Lane! Robbie slams Vinnie into the arena floor with a Robbiebomb! Robbie holds onto Lane's legs! Robbie lifts Vinnie again, and sets to deliver another Robbiebomb, only Vinnie shits himself! Vinnie's C.Diff fecal matter cascades all over Robbie Bourbon, coating him with a slick brown sheen of shit.
Gaylord Cockshafer: Scat! We have scat on Savage, Stump! This is insane!
Mike Stump: Somebody stop this, this is too much!
Vinnie Lane rolls out of Robbie's powerbomb clutch as Robbie coughs and gags in reflex to being shit on. Vinnie charges in and delivers a running enziguri, and Robbie keels and hits his head on the ring apron, his chin resting on it as his body goes into a kneeling postition! Vinnie Lane climbs the ring apron at the opposite end and points at Robbie's head! He runs at Bourbon, but Bourbon steps back at the last second as Vinnie does a full on Charlie Brown missed kick and soars through the air and to the arena floor.
Robbie reaches under the ring and pulls out a fire extinguisher, and immediately dowses himself with it to remove the putrid waste from Lane. As he does, Vinnie Lane gets back to his feet slowly, and Robbie turns and brings the cylander of the fire extinguisher down across his back. Vinnie goes back to his hands and knees, and Robbie drops the fire extinguisher. He climbs the ring apron, charges, and lands a rolling senton onto Vinnie on the floor!
Robbie reaches under the ring, and pulls out what looks to be a tranquilizer gun! He looks at it, but accidentally pulls the trigger, shooting himself in the neck! He shakes his head briefly, then aims and fires at Lane, hitting him too. Lane starts to stand, revived by the tranquilizer...
...kind of.
Vinnie, in a stupor from the dart shot, hits a forearm on Bourbon. He hits another forearm, and another, then bashes Bourbon's head into the ring post! He then spins and pushes Robbie into the ring! Vinnie reaches under the ring and pulls out a steel chair.
Robbie starts to stand up in the ring, slowly, one leg fully extended as he tries to get some semblance of balance with the other. He stands, and keels back into the ropes and holds on, shaking his head...
...like he's trying to shake the cobwebs out...
But he soon drops to a knee again. Vinnie Lane slowly gets into the ring, using the steel ring steps, but stops in the middle of the steps. He tosses the steel chair aside and actually picks up the ring steps, and slides them into the ring. Vinnie climbs onto the apron as Robbie slowly wobbles towards him. Vinnie hits a drop toe hold on Robbie, sending him face first into the steel steps! Vinnie Lane picks up Bourbon, cinches in an arm wrench, and drives home a Bad Medicine Knee-Driver on Bourbon into the steps!
Vinnie goes for a pin...
...One
...Two
Bourbon somehow gets a shoulder up! Lane shrugs for a moment, then applies a sleeper hold to Bourbon! Bourbon is already almost out! Robbie barely struggles within the hold, and the effects of the tranquilizers seem to be assisting the sleeper! Lane applies more pressure, and the referee checks to see if Robbie is out by lifting an arm! It drops! The referee lifts the arm a second time!
It drops!
The referee lifts the arm a third time...
Bourbon keeps his arm in the air! Robbie is fighting out of the sleeper hold, and delivers a series of elbows to Vinnie Lane! Bourbon gets to his feet, delivers a back chop to Lane, then hooks him and delivers a vertical suplex! Bourbon floats over with the suplex into a pin!
1...
2...
Kick out! Vinnie Lane forces his way out of that pinning predicament, so Bourbon grabs Vinnie and pulls him to his feet! He grabs Vinnie by the throat, and delivers the Earth's Mightiest Chokeslam to him! NO, Vinnie slides out of the choke mid-air! He spins Bourbon around and hits a DDT, and goes for the pin!
1...
2...
Kick out! Bourbon tosses Vinnie off of him like he was made of feathers, and sits up. Robbie looks less than pleased. Vinnie comes in with a stiff kick to Robbie's skull, then he pulls out Robbie's pink slip and wipes his ass with it! He sticks it in Robbie's face, but Bourbon grabs the pink slip from Lane and Lane's wrist with the other hand! Bourbon jams the shit covered pink slip into Vinnie Lane's mouth!
As he does this, Vinnie delivers a sit-out dropkick to both of Robbie's knees, sending Robbie to the mat! Vinnie pulls the pink slip out of his mouth! He looks furious, and pulls Robbie to his feet. He goes for the Irish Whip, but Robbie stomps his foot hard on the ground, stopping the attempt! He then grabs Lane and drags him to the ropes and gets his arms twisted in the top and middle rope. Robbie turns and looks at Vinnie as the crowd goes wild!
*FUCK HIM UP, ROBBIE, FUCK HIM UP*CLAP, CLAP*FUCK HIM UP, ROBBIE, FUCK HIM UP*CLAP, CLAP*FUCK HIM UP, ROBBIE, FUCK HIM UP*
Robbie Bourbon charges, and leaps, shooting over the ropes feet first and clasping Vinnie Lane's neck...
NECKWRECKER!
Mike Stump: BRUTAL!
As Robbie finishes delivering the leaping neckbreaker to Lane, landing it on the ring Apron, he sits on the arena floor, and pulls out some papers from under the ring along with a pen! He takes Lane's limp wrist and sticks the pen in his hand, making him sign the papers! Robbie laughs with delight as he puts the paperwork back beneath the ring.
"Helluva way to renegotiate a contract, boss!"
Robbie picks up Lane and throws him back into the ring!
Robbie runs at Lane who has clambered to his feet.
Lane ducks a clothesline.
Bourbon turns…
Lane picks Bourbon up onto his back…
BLACK LABEL DRIVER!!!! (Vertebreaker)
The cover!
1………..
2……………
3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Universal Champ has done it!!!
Vinnie Lane grabs his belt and raises it into the air!
What a match up and what a victory by the champion!!!
MAIN EVENT
Intercontinental Championship
Makaveli
- vs -
Ophelia McVeigh
Xtreme Rulez |
We open up to our main event and the challenger, Ophelia McVeigh is stood in the centre of the ring pacing in circles, waiting for the champion to emerge.
Mike Stump: What a huge main event we have tonight set up by a new part of the management team in Archie Lawson! The Intercontinental Championship is on the line with Makaveli defending his belt against the beast that is Ophelia McVeigh! And here comes the champion now…
The lights dim. The ramp fills with fog. 2 pac begins to bellow out of the booming speakers and the Intercontinental Champion emerges at the top of the ramp, his belt glistening in the gleaming light.
Makveli strides down the ramp with a smug look on his face. It doesn’t look like he’s taking this title match seriously at all!
He slides in the ring and hands the title to the referee who raises the belt in the air and before he can even throw the belt to the side McVeigh has jumped at Makaveli with a flurry of flying forearms, god that’s a lot of fs!
Remember this is Xtreme rules tonight! McVeigh pushes Makaveli against the ropes and whips him to the opposite side of the ring. He bounces off the ropes and ducks under a wild clothesline from Ophelia. The champion continues running but jumps up onto the opposing middle rope, spins within the air and executes a beautiful spinning springboard forearm to take out the challenger! Exceptional from the champ!
Makaveli goes for an early cover but McVeigh kicks out almost immediately and both competitors are straight back to their feet. Mak offers a hand to his opponent, suggesting a test of strength but as soon as Ophelia grabs his hand Makaveli kicks the challenger in the gut. He grabs him by the head and flings McVeigh face first into the turnbuckle. He hits a cross body chop and then whips the challenger across the ring. Makaveli then sprints across the ring and goes for a splash in the corner but McVeigh is swift on his feet and dodges the splash. Ophelia turns around and lifts Makaveli up by the leg, soaring him into the sky and then plants the champion face first in the centre of the ring to execute a high impact flap jack!
McVeigh scurries across the ring for a pin but Makaveli kicks out immediately. McVeigh looks slightly stunned by the champ’s resilience and drops an elbow on him before picking him up by the head and flinging him towards the ropes. He then lifts Makaveli up by the legs and plants him on the ground before rolling him over and hooking the left leg and locking in a single legged Boston Crab.
The champion is screaming in agony but he manages to get some leverage using his upper body strength and then uses his athleticism to roll forwards. The momentum causes McVeigh to fly to the outside and go face first into the barrier! Mak lifts an arm in the air and the crowd jeer him immediately. He’s not finished though! He runs off the ropes and comes flying over the top ropes with a devastating leap of faith that lands perfectly on McVeigh!
McVeigh is sent over into the crowd but is picked up by a particularly strong fan. Makaveli climbs up onto the barrier and soars towards McVeigh! McVeigh counters it with a mid-air uppercut. Both fall to the floor for a moment but they’re fast to their feet. McVeigh takes down Makaveli and unloads some fast jabs to the face of the champion.
McVeigh picks Makaveli up and throws him back over the barrier. Ophelia then rams Makaveli’s back into the ring apron, causing agonising pain to the spine!
McVeigh tosses Makaveli into the ring and then goes looking under the ring apron. He pulls out a garbage can that is full of weapons! He tosses it into the ring and immediately pulls a kendo stick out from the can! As he is about to strike Makaveli with it though, the champion rolls out of the way and then turns to hit McVeigh with a low blow!!!
Cheap shot by the champion!!
He covers McVeigh!
1………
2………….
And a last second kick out at two!
Makaveli grabs the trash can lid and cracks McVeigh in the skull with it, sending the challenger back against the ropes. He then throws the lid at McVeigh who catches it but not to his benefit. With the lid held up high, Makaveli leaps into the air and executes a perfect Indica (Enzuigiri) right onto the steel and it connects with McVeigh’s skull!
Blood is now oozing everywhere!
Makaveli picks up McVeigh and whips him acorss the ring. The champion slides under Ophelia and then on the turn hits a clothesline! And another clothesline! Then another! McVeigh keeps getting up but this time Makaveli whips McVeigh in the corner and then clotheslines him there instead. Still to no real avail! So he runs off of the opposite ropes and spears McVeigh in the corner before rolling him onto the ground.
Makaveli leaps up onto the top turnbuckle, McVeigh clambers to his feet but walks into an efficient moonsault from the champion!
The cover… The kick out almost immediately by McVeigh!
Makaveli looks in the trash can and pulls out a two by four wrapped in barbed wire! He looks to hit McVeigh with it but McVeigh hits a forearm to the gut of the champion before planting him with a devastating corkscrew neckbreaker!
McVeigh then grabs the two by four and rubs the barbed wire right into the champion’s skull, forcing blood to ooze everywhere!
McVeigh runs off the ropes and executes a powerful shining wizard! Mcveigh with the cover!
1……….
2…………
Kick out!
McVeigh picks Makaveli up and whips him into the corner. He empties the trash can and uses the trash can as a weapon. He places it between the opposite middle and top turnbuckle. He then runs at Makaveli with a big boot but the champion dodges it! McVeigh is then caught up, his foot trapped on the top turnbuckle! Makaveli seizes the opportunity by grabbing the kendo stick and striking the challenger straight on the back with it!
AND AGAIN!
He then runs off the ropes and hits a spinning roundhouse kick on the back of the challenger’s head! But McVeigh is still caught up, screaming in pain!
Makaveli grabs him from behind and flings him over his head, executing a brutal german suplex!
Makaveli points to the top.
The champion climbs up high... He goes for the Mak Attack (Shooting Star Press) but McVeigh rolls out of the way at the last minute!
Both men are down.
They slowly clamber to their feet before exchanging slow and heavy forearms. McVeigh comes out on top! He kicks Makaveli in the gut and shoves the champion head first between his legs. He flips over and executes the Opheliac Driver! (Flipping Piledriver!)
McVeigh thinks it’s over! Surely that’s it!
1…………………….
2……………….
KICK OUT!!!! I DON’T BELIEVE IT!!
HOW THE FUCK HAS MAKAVELI KICKED OUT OF THAT!? BRUTAL! SAVAGE! DEVASTATING!
McVeigh looks up at the referee in complete shock!
McVeigh gets up and begins to continuously stomp on the champion in pure outrage. He picks Makaveli up and lifts him high up in the air into the position of a vertical suplex!
Makaveli kicks his legs though and uses the momentum to turn the attack into his own. He reverses it and executes a cross body in mid-air!
1…….
Kick out!
Makaveli then runs off the ropes and hits a drop kick!
He then heads to the top!!
MAK ATTACK! (Shooting Star Press)
1……………
2………………………
Thr……NO!!! KICK OUT!!
What a kick out by Ophelia McVeigh! This title match has been an all-time great and it goes on!
Makaveli picks up McVeigh. He kicks him in the gut and plants him with a DDT onto the trash can lid!
Makaveli then finds a small back and unloads thumbtacks all over the floor!
Makaveli grabs McVeigh and throws him head first into the trash can that is placed in the turnbuckle.
He goes to execute another German suplex but McVeigh shoves Makaveli forwards into the ropes!
Mike Stump: Wait a god damn minute! What’s he doing out here!
It’s Archie Lawson! He’s up on the ring apron and he plants Makaveli with a shot from brass knuckles!!
It’s Xtreme Rules! Anything goes!
McVeigh then kicks Makaveli in the gut and executes another OPHELIAC DRIVER!!! (FLIPPING PILEDRIVER)
McVeigh falls back but Archie pulls McVeigh into the cover!
1………….
2…………..
3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
McVeigh does it! McVeigh does it!
Ophelia McVeigh lifts the Intercontinental Championship up in the air but the celebrations are cut short!
Archie Lawson climbs into the ring but he is flanked by Chris MacBeth and Scully, two members of The Union! MacBeth and Scully both begin to annihilate Makaveli, hitting him over and over again with forearms and stomps alike.
“NOBODY DISRESPECTS ME!”
Archie Lawson turns with a smirk on his face, he lifts the arms of Scully and MacBeth into the air. The shot fades with McVeigh walking backwards up the ramp, the championship on his shoulder before panning onto the Union who are stood in the centre of the ring with grins on their faces.