I liked your thread as Kimmy. For some reason I didn't feel comfortable posting as her. I dunno.

Now, time for a short (I hope, but I can't promise anything) contribution from me.

I'm 17. What do I know? Too damn much, yet too damn little.

Let's start in an odd place. Remember a day or two ago when I had Thraxx tell Kimmy Happiness is an offense punishable by death. And I've had all of my warnings?... Well, that really is my mindset a majority of the time. I was happy, and then my mother had an abusive patch. I was happy, then my psychotic ex-stepfather (current at the time) tried to murder both my mother and I.... I was happy, and then my heart was crushed. Twice. I was happy and then I risked everything to help a friend who turned their back. I was happy, and then I realised I was obsessed with someone for no logical reason and hade to tear out that part of my heart that attached us. Some fucking story behind that, but I won't tell it. I have nothing, and sometimes I forget that I'm not dead yet. I literally feel like I'm waiting to die.

Now, let me be honest here. I'll tell you something that I rarely admit to myself, let alone anyone else. While my characters are fictional, they all mean a lot. But Thraxx and Kimmy are close to, if not the most meaningful.

Thraxx is my dark, but humorous side. I'm not offended when people say things about my characters because they aren't me, however parts of me are poured into parts of them. Thraxx shows some of the darker depths of myself that I'll agree to reveal, and has my negative outlook on life. I have some harsh views and I honestly believe that in part I'm a genuinely bad person. You can say I'm not. But, you don't know me. Nobody really does. I wish I could say I do. And to an extent, I know myself. But nobody else has any idea who I am. At all. And people in XWF probably know the least about me. Even those who think they know plenty. They don't. I wish they did. But, after everything, I can feel my heart break in advance any time I extend a hand of friendship or reveal anything about myself and who I really am. Hell, my best friends don't know shit about me. "Basic" shit, yes. I hate pepsi. I'm a cat person. I'm really into Avatar: The Last Airbender, but I haven't paid much attention to it in the last three weeks. The people I love, I probably shouldn't. The people I hate, I probably shouldn't. Well, not all of the people I hate. However, I pretty much resent the majority of people. That's part of why I spend so much time online. So I can take a deep breath, and actually make an effort to be nice where I have to react faster IRL... It hurts. I wish I could be the kind of person worth a shit, but I'm not. And nobody manages to convince me otherwise. Anymore. Because each time I let it happen, it doesn't turn out well for me. I end up depressed. In tears, as I am writing this. Hell, I don't know why. To be honest, I'm not even sure if this is a stupid fucking cry for attention at the core or whether I'm writing this to contribute. And I can't say I care. I'm getting it out there.

The majority of people, I dislike. As I've said. I don't get people. They're stupid and fucking crazy. And I don't get why people see an insect and squish it because they can... What, some sick enjoyment?.... "Uhhh.... I'm allergic to them, so I'm gonna go all the fucking way over there to kill it, even though we're outdoors and the fucking things are placid".... Honestly? What the fuck!?... Humans are the only ones who, as a majority, deserve to die because they're that fucked up in the head, myself included. Myself especially. But honestly, any life (besides plants, I suppose that's a flaw in me) mean more to me than a human life. Well, the life of a human who I am not attached to. And if that hurts you people... Well, I'm either sorry or I don't give a flying fuck. I can't decide. Just realised I never described Kimmy. Dammit. Ugghhh... Stupid fucking tangent, FUCK....

Now, I am a very twisted individual. My head's fucked up, and quite honestly I should probably be locked away, not that I have any plans to end a life (Unless it turns out my ex-stepfather's alive still and I ever see him... He really deserves to die).... And then there's that part of me I've shown hints of throughout this rant. The kind part of me that goes "that isn't right", "I'm sorry" or "I care".... Because I do care. And that's where Kimmy comes into it. Mindlessly caring, and being lead by the heart as I used to be. And through Kimmy I can do it in a safer way. I still want to. And now, pouring kindness out can't come back to beat the shit out of me afterwards and leave me scarred yet again. Kimmy's just a character. And she just bounces back. There's another aspect of Kimmy that involves a personality disorder I believe I have, but I won't bitch about that too.

There you go. A small portion of the mind of Ann Thraxx. And you're not even in the darkest depths yet. Not even close, I promise. And I never break a promise.

P.S.... Turned into a rant that had nothing to do with Duke's topic. My apologies... Didn't hold back, of course....... I feel like playing the knife-hand game now.... Kinda in that mood to play it. Blindfolded. To flight of the bumblebee. Did I mention that I have the world's worst hand-eye co-ordination? This should be fun. *singing* "I have got no fingers. I just chopped them off. I can't miss the spaces in between because I don't have any fucking fingers you idiot"

How come all the weird kinky stuff in the world reminds you people of me!?