The scene opens with the backdrop of an old bar. There's a jukebox in the corner, playing 70s rock music.

Dick Drizzle is sitting at the bar, slightly hunched over, cradling a glass of whiskey.

He looks directly into the camera.

"You know, kid, back in my day, I've taken on many, but not in the squared circle. My battleground? Bars like this. I've battled over spilt beer, unsettled tabs, unsettled debts, and of course, women, WOOOOOOO! *HIC*."

"And sure, I owe the mob a little money, but who doesn't these days with the economy and all? *HIC*"

The camera cuts to some black and white footage of Dick getting into scuffles in various bars, breaking chairs, and dodging broken beer bottles.

"WOOOOOO! *HIC* It's time for Dick Drizzle to step into the limelight and into the ring! Centurion, you better be ready because at Anarchy, it's not about who's the better wrestler– it's about decades of brain-bashing, bone-breaking, street-fighting, experience! That I'VE GOT! WOOOOOO! *HIC*"

As the camera zooms out, we see BOB D standing next to him, looking slightly bewildered as he listens to the old man's drunken rant.

Dick, smirking, "*HIC* Kid, it's all the same to me. Doesn't even matter if you know a wristlock if you know to aim your knife-edged chops a little northernly, if you know what I mean. *HIC* A fight is a fight, and there ain't no honor in a fight, just the man left standing and the other guy. And before I take on the other guy in my debut on Anarchy, I wouldn't mind getting some gold around my waist. What do you think, BOB? Think I can snag a title before my big debut?"

Dick, suddenly aggressively, and without warning, kicks BOB D right between the legs. As BOB D doubles over in pain, Dick expertly pins him with an inside cradle on the bar's floor.


A DRUNKEN MIKA HUNT APPEARS IN A SOPPING WET T-SHIRT!



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"WOOOOO! *HIC*