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BIG PREESH · **08-25-2022, 05:54 AM**

Preesh wakes up from a little nap where he was dreaming about being Abraham Lincoln.

He feels what could only be described as a hobo taking a vacation from his usual sleeping arrangements in an IHOP dumpster, and he instinctually KICKS THE F OUT, sending a bedheaded Charlie Nickles with an unfortunate case of morning wood flying.

"AYYYYYYYYYYY! Get off me SON!"

Preesh then finds, like magic, a big black top hat on the ground next to him. Was it all real? Was he the man who freed the slaves and preserved the Union? Was he born in a log cabin in Kentucky in 1809?

Preesh puts the hat on as Charlie dusts himself off, doing that thing that kids do when they are trying to hide a boner pretty badly.

"Fourscore and seven years ago, I punched Charlie Nickles in the dick!"

Big Preesh then punches Charlie Nickles really hard in the dick. Pretty sure he broke it. There's a little blood spot and everything.

"BOB for life, beeeyoooooootch!"

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