The interrogation room.

The same one where Flynn gave NK a polygraph.

A single, blinking lamp is the only source of light.

A cold, metal table.

And this time, sitting on the same side. Side by side.

The Most Hated Man in the XWF, Mark Flynn.

And that dastardly, bastardly North Korean War Criminal.

NKWC sits back in his chair comfortably, grinning like the cat that ate the canary.

Flynn, alternatively, seems a little puzzled… Like he’s trying to recall a long-lost memory.

NK notices Flynn’s discomfort and leans in.

“Everything all right?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just… How do you do this again?”

NK smiles, delighted at Flynn’s momentary mental lapse.

“...Did you forget how to deliver trash talk, Mark Flynn?”

“Give me a break, NK. It’s been seven years and we didn’t get any practice last week.”

“Would you like to stretch and limber up while I kick this off, old man?”

“Ooooh, Tough talk coming from a guy who gets a parade thrown every time he ties his shoes.”

“Pssh, I trash talk rings around you, Mark Flynn. And I do it in a second language.”

“Sure, you cut a great promo. Especially after Central Command fixes your shit in post-production. I miss 2014. Back then, people actually knew how to talk.”

“Hmm. I bet you really miss 2014 because it was the last time you were relevant.”

“No, I really miss 2014 because, back then, you were dead.”

Both chuckle.

“See, you still have it, Mark Flynn.”

“Yep, there we go. It’s just like riding a bike.”

“Are you ready to ‘kick it up a notch’?”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

NK stands up from his chair.

“We hope this demonstration will help you in your upcoming tag team endeavors, Dolly Waters. Perhaps you are unaware, but THIS is what a tag team sounds like.”

NK points towards Flynn then himself, back and forth a couple times.

“A good tag team bounces off each other. They build momentum off each other and demonstrate chemistry that will carry into the ring.”

“Of course, I hope I’m not criticizing your team’s strategy too harshly… Your strategy of taking turns speaking individually and barely acknowledging each other’s material.”

Flynn giggles from his chair.

“I know, right? What an innovative approach for ‘one of the future greatest tag teams in history’… Cutting two separate promos, one after the other. Now, that’s a game-changer!”

“They must be very concerned about the delta variant, since they kept their trash talk sessions six feet apart.”

“Although, honestly, if I had to work with Latina Submission Machina’s promo, I’d also want to stay six feet apart.”

“I’d prefer LSM stayed socially distant from any microphone.”

“If I were Dolly Waters, I’d pull the plug...”

…

…

…

“...On this tag team.”

Flynn winks.

NK covers his heart and fans his face.

“Please get well soon, Corey Smith. We only hope that you recover fully, so you have the strength to give Dolly Waters the Tag Team intervention she needs.”

“Haha, for real, though. Did you listen to LSM’s promo?”

“Do NOT remind me.”

NK comes around to the front of the table.

“Did you hear her asking if I’m actually from North Korea? Insinuating I’m a Seth Rogen character because I don’t ‘talk right’ and ‘act’ like her mental concept of a North Korean.”

Flynn points at the camera to get LSM’s attention.

“First off, harmful stereotypes.”

“Tommy Wish does the same thing. He complains I don’t speak enough Korean, then tosses out a Korean phrase he got from Google translate as if I’m a trained labrador and should speak my native language on command.”

“The kids nowadays call it a…”

Flynn puts up his fingers to deliver air quotes…

“‘MICRO AGGRESSION’.”

“I’m honestly afraid if LSM and I start off the match this Wednesday, she’s going to ask to touch my hair.”

“Or bring math problems for you to solve.”

Flynn and NK both cackle. Suddenly, NK straightens up and points at the camera.

“Listen here, LSM! We North Koreans are a very diverse cultural group.”

Flynn points as well.

“Get educated.”

“And, to top it all off, she made her birther argument after we cut a promo where MARK FLYNN GAVE ME A POLYGRAPH affirming I was from North Korea.”

NK shakes his head in disbelief. Flynn pats him on the arm from his chair to get his attention.

“Did that Mexican luchadora really just ask to see your birth certificate?”

“Even if I showed her, she’d probably say I doctored it.”

“You heard it here first, folks. Should his name be North Korean War Criminal or Secret Kenyan War Criminal?”

“Better question: Should her name be Latina Submission Machina or Latina-For-Trump Submission Machina?”

Flynn gets up out of his chair, fired up.

“Hot damn, that was good.”

“Thank you, Mark Flynn.”

“You know what, actually, if she’s going to claim you’re not North Korean, I’d like to see her prove her own origin!”

NK gasps.

“Mark Flynn, you wouldn’t!”

“I would! I argue there’s reasonable evidence that Latina Submission Machina…”

…

“IS NOT A MACHINA AT ALL!”

NK faints backwards into his chair.

“You almost got away with it, Latina Submission HUMANA! However, when watching the video tape of your Warfare debut...”

NK sits up awake.

“Which you lost... To someone who got fired after their performance.”

“Side by side in the ring with Mr. BOB, a REAL machine, it’s obvious you don’t have the same features and mannerisms of a MACHINA.”

NK shakes his head.

“Flynn, let’s avoid these harmful stereotypes.”

“But…”

NK wags his finger, shaming Flynn.

“Machines are a diverse cultural group. Let’s not sink to LSM’s bigoted level.”

Flynn ponders this, stroking his chin. Then nods.

“Of course you’re right, NK.”

“We don’t need to borrow moves from the playbook of someone who still thinks ‘having an Asian friend’ is a hall pass for intolerance.”

They both tsk-tsk at the camera.

“For shame.” They say in unison.

“Although… she said in her promo against Big Money Oswald she’s a HUMAN submission machine.”

“Oh, so maybe it’s a metaphorical machine?”

“Well, no, she actually said she’s a LITERAL ‘human submission machine’.”

“...Does that mean she’s a cyborg? Half-machine, half-human? All submission?”

“I think it means she’s still learning English.”

“That explains her shit promos.”

Flynn and NK nod satisfied, as if that solves this mystery.

“She’s turning heads, though.”

“She turns my stomach, at least.”

“She’s booked three matches in her first week in the XWF.”

“How very impressive. Two wins and one loss.”

“Nothing screams ‘Future XWF Legend’ like a debut loss.”

“Especially when her first victory came from her opponent’s team imploding mid-match.”

“Yeah, I wish that happened to us.”

“We actually have to BEAT our opponents.”

“To be fair, she beat Oswald.”

“Her and two-thirds of the roster.”

“It’s gonna be real sad when she finds out the Billion Dollar championship isn’t worth the leather it’s super-glued to.”

“Did you see LSM and Oswald arguing over the rules of a fabricated championship belt?”

“It’s like watching two idiots having a race to see who can rub two brain cells together...”

“When they each only have one to spare.”

Flynn and NK slyly high-five and bump fists.

Suddenly, Flynn gets in real close to the camera.

“I bet you’re already hitting fast-forward on this promo, Dolly.”

“I bet you’re thinking… ‘When are they going to get to me?’”

“I know Vinnie Lane gave me the short end of the shit stick, partnering me with this green as gooseshit geek.”

NK comes in behind Flynn.

“¡Vuelve a los circuitos independientes, Machina!”

“‘When are we going to get to the part where they talk about me?’”

“Well, once again, Dolly, since you’re going into the big Margarita Mix OCW tournament…”

“Since you’ve wrestled six times in a row in tag-team action… Here’s a tip about what good tag teams do.”

“They isolate the weak link.”

“They minimize the potential impact of the stronger player and make it 2-on-1 at every opportunity.”

“SO GET READY FOR 10 MORE MINUTES OF LSM BURNS!”

Flynn and NK rib each other, smiling.

“And get ready to sit on the apron for five-and-a-half minutes while we snap LSM in half like a wishbone on thanksgiving.”

“Although honestly, Dolly Waters, you might appreciate 330 seconds of rest given the full schedule you have booked for yourself.”

“For real. We were just talking about LSM working twice in her first week. What does Dolly’s calendar look like?”

“Well, let’s take a look.”

NK reaches under the table and retrieves a calendar. The picture for the month of August is a cat hanging on a limb with a caption that says “Hang in there, baby”.

“She just wrestled Betsy Granger.”

“How’d that go?”

“She won! Welcome to the club of people who beat Betsy Granger, Dolly Waters. It’s a club I too am a member of.”

“They used to give out jackets... Until they ran out.”

“Then, in September…”

NK flips the page of the calendar. The month’s picture is the cat fallen back-first on the ground, with the caption reading “What did I just fucking tell you?”.

“Three nights later, she wrestles us.”

“Biggest challenge on her calendar so far...”

“Then, she goes over to OCW to fight in the Margarita Mix finals with Hector Malvado.”

“She teams with a lot of hispanic wrestlers, huh?”

“Yes, you’d assume a wrestler from the Deep South might be more concerned with luchadors coming over here to steal American wrestling jobs.”

Both Flynn and NK give a thumbs up to the camera.

“Way to buck the trend, Dolly Waters. It’s nice that ONE of you embraces other cultures and ignores anti-immigrant myths.”

“Especially the blatantly false ones. Hispanic wrestlers aren’t stealing our jobs. Actually, fun fact: by 2025, we’re going to lose half of all wrestling jobs to automation!”

NK gasps again.

“Those damn machines again!”

“¡Vuelve la línea de montaje, Machina!”

“Speaking of assembly lines, the matches won’t stop coming for Dolly Waters!”

“IF Dolly wins the finals… She has another match five days later on September 6th at OCW: Under the Lights. ”

“She’s doing this while keeping Coreytopia running… Taking over GM Duties on Anarchy… Holy fuck, Dolly, when do you sleep?!?”

As Flynn speaks, NK gets a look on his face. One of puzzlement and confusion. He starts counting on his fingers… Starting with six, and then taking away five...

This only leaves him more befuddled.

“...Wait, Mark Flynn. Please hold on, I’m perplexed.”

“We’re on a roll, NK. What’s up?”

“I worry I may be counting incorrectly. Help me to understand this conundrum.”

“Okay.”

“Five days before September 6th… Is September 1st.”

“Yes, correct, so far.”

“So, Dolly Waters will fight in the Margarita Mix Finals on September 1st?”

“You’re doing great. I’m so proud of you.”

“WEDNESDAY, September 1st.”

Flynn’s eyes suddenly widen.

“And our match on the upcoming Wednesday Night Warfare…”

“Is September 1st. Holy Shit.”

“So, I am not incorrect?!?”

Flynn buries his head into his hands.

“Holy SHIT. HOLY SHIT!”

NK cackles and points into the camera.

“Dolly Waters, you made the biggest mistake you can as a wrestler!”

Flynn howls, laughing.

“YOU DOUBLE-BOOKED YOURSELF! OH NO, DOLLY!”

Flynn’s expression alternates between being tickled and shocked.

“No wonder half your XWF press conference you were talking about the OCW Margarita Mix! You probably forgot which Wednesday match you were promoting. You probably have a flight to catch right after the match!”

NK snaps his fingers.

“Mark Flynn, we might need to help our friend Dolly Waters out. Do you think we can pummel LSM down to spare ‘machina’ parts in 4 minutes instead of our pre-scheduled five-and-a-half? Buy her another 90 seconds to get to the Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport and fly to the OCW Studio?”

“I mean, what choice do we have? It’s the most considerate thing to do at this point!”

NK nods emphatically, then turns back to the camera.

“Dolly Waters, here’s what you’re going to do: Bring your suitcase to the ring. Have your driver pull around the side of the arena after the starting bell. Write your ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ tag-team break-up card before the match and leave it on LSM’s locker just before your music hits.”

“Don’t worry, we will make this quick.”

“It’ll practically be a curbside beatdown.”

“It’s the least we can do.”

“As in, beating down LSM would take the least amount of our effort.”

Flynn and NK howl, laughing at Dolly’s scheduling snafu.

“Can we give you some advice for free, though, Dolly? Besides, ‘buy a fucking calendar’?”

NK’s mouth is agape.

“Flynn! You’re a filthy capitalist! You’re going to give away trade secrets for FREE?”

Flynn shrugs.

“Hey, if Dolly is going to wrestle 400 tag matches in a calendar year, I feel like she should have a better grasp of how they work.”

NK shakes his head but waves his hand to allow it.

“In a tag-team match… Individual performance counts for ZERO.”

“Goose-egg.”

“Nada.”

“The spirit of tag-team wrestling is about being a piece of something capable of greater than you are as an individual.”

“So, your sentiment about how I got dumped ‘unceremoniously’ by DOCK… only demonstrates the single dimension on which your mind operates in the ring.”

“Who’s inside of it and who’s outside of it.”

“Open your mind, Dolly Waters.”

“If you knew the card beforehand, you might remember I wasn’t originally in that match. NK was.”

“My idea. I knew Team Captain Thaddeus Duke had given Flynn a deadline of the night of WarGames to answer his challenge. And Flynn’s presence would distract him ever-so-slightly from the match.”

“And if you bothered to watch the match, you might notice I was dressed like a luchador and calling myself ‘Flynn Marko’.”

“That was Mark Flynn’s idea. The nature of which was Thaddeus Duke’s obsession with a match with Flynn would be momentarily triggered by Flynn subbing into WarGames. But that obsession would be exacerbated continuously for the entire length if he wore a mask that might shroud his identity.”

“You also would have noticed I took every opportunity to dodge Thad from the face-off he wanted as long as I could. I didn’t have to drag him out of the ring… He’d follow me.”

“This created a number of opportunities by which the rest of Team F.U.C.K.T.H.A.D. would be outnumbered and outgunned. It was effectively a match-long powerplay.”

“It’s the strategy that let us take an early 4-2 lead in WarGames, dumping all the ‘Cannon Fodder’, as Dock referred to Andre Dixon and Corporate Chaos.”

“You may argue that our trick play was all for not, Dolly Waters. Seeing as how Doctor Louis D’Ville and Thaddeus Duke evened the score.”

“But, you’d be forgetting Dock left the ring with a vulnerable Corey and Alias to take me out while Thad and I had our long-awaited exchange.”

“And that Thad’s exhaustion after having to prove he could do everything I could, expended enough of Thad’s energy that he and Dock remained at a significant disadvantage.”

“A disadvantage that enabled both Corey Smith’s and Comrade Alias’ survival into the WarGames finals.”

“You see, when you’re not fighting losers like Geri Vayden and Marf...”

Flynn puts a hand to the side of his mouth like he’s telling a secret.

“Quick shout out to our boy, Dick Powers.”

NK delivers a thumbs up.

“Way to single-handedly keep the syphilis vaccine industry alive, Dick Powers!”

Flynn shakes his head.

“When you fight teams that actually pose a challenge.”

“When you battle teams that have skill and prowess.”

“Sometimes you sacrifice a bishop to take a rook.”

“Sometimes, you lose a knight to move the king into a vulnerable position.”

“And while you may have made the WarGames finals, Dolly Waters. Our team won the match.”

“By a margin of two whole survivors.”

“One of the most dominant WarGames victories in XWF History.”

Flynn and NK lean back on the metal table, satisfied.

“Are you seeing the big picture, Dolly?”

“We very much hope you’re getting some valuable knowledge out of this lesson. We want you to be… re-educated.”

“We’re playing 5D chess out here and you’re still trying to figure out how the horsey piece moves.”

“For reference, it moves in an L.”

NK draws an L in the air with his finger.

“Which is what you and LSM are going to take on Warfare. A big…”

“Fat.”

“L.”

Flynn and NK draw L’s in tandem, grinning slyly. The scene fades to black.