Thunder Knuckles is wearing a white polar bear fur coat, shirtless underneath, and cut off jean shorts. He walks up to a podium with a gavel in one hand and an ice-cold Coors in the other.


If your thinking “WOW!” this auction is early you're absolutely correct!

I have a responsibility, no obligation, to get this fantastic opportunity out in front of my potential buyers.

Someone selling a number one contender’s spot a second time is UNPRECEDENTED!

You should know by now that ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles means business. I'm going to continue to do the hard work, so you don’t have to.

Bringing you the best quality matches for your hard-earned xbux. YOU could be the next champion!

Thunder Knuckles Auctions inc. is proud to present a number one contender’s spot for the Television Title up for bid. Today we will start the bidding off at THIRTY THOUSAND xbux. I promise you, I will walk over and slap whoever starts lower than that.

This auction isn’t accepting any other currency or trades. So, don’t be coming in here talking about “I got a to give ya.” or “I got a dollar. he-yuck-yuck.”.

Who REALLY thinks they can become champion. This auction ends on December 5th at midnight the highest bidder wins! The winning bidder has twenty-four hours to pay to receive their shot at the Television Champion.

Good Luck and have fun...This auction begins…

NOW!


Thunder Knuckles cracks the gavel off the podium to signifying the beginning of the auction.


By the way, This is completely legal. No need to ask questions.