(03-06-2018, 06:40 PM)The Engineer Said: I don't even touch accents, they're really fucking hard to pull off convincingly. In the 10 years or so I've been doing this I've run into maybe one person who did it competently.

Long story short, don't write accents.

Being country as hell myself, I find writing a country accent pretty easy. Jason Cash from my tps is basically me without the beer drinking. I spell things how I say them. Y'all,..yer instead of your or you're. Shit like 'at


"Ole Barney. The hell you doinhere?", Jason asked with a laugh.

He got up to see the old, short, fat man who he knew so well. "Barney" didnt take things very kindly. He grabbed Jason the collar of his white ZT shirt.

"You under arrest boy.", barney said. Jason looked surprised. "The hell for?", Jason asked. Barney shook his fat head. " Drunk in public.", Barney said.

Jason, who was going along with it, stopped dead in his tracks. " Drunk in public? Hell I wanted ta be drunk in the bar. They threw my ass inta public.", Jason said with a laugh. Ole Barney hid a smile. " That's a Ron White joke.", Barney said.

"Yea but that mess fits. They sexially assualted me and threw my ass inta public. I wanna press charges.", Jason said. Barney thought for a minute. " Sexual assault? How in the world?", Barney asked.

Jason pointed to his still sore balls. "That sumbitch touched me in my no no place.", Jason said, still laughing. Barney could only rub his temple. " They kicked you in the balls while you were trying to bite BJs right ear off.", he said. Jason nodded. " Uhh..yea! He did at mess with his sumbitchin foot. I wanna press some damn charges.", Jason laughed.

The deputy had had enough. "It don't matter, you're gointo jail for drunk in public. And assault.", he said. Jason's mouth dropped. " Assault? How in the hell didI assault any damn body?", Jason asked.

Barney stopped walking. " You were kicking Bart in his teeth", Barney said. Jason grinned. "Only cause I kept missin that sumbitchs throat.", he said.

"Barney gave him a warning type look. Jason took the hint and threw his hands up. "Hands up dont shoot!", Jason started to yell. "Barney " was shocked. He grabbed Jason's arms and tried to put them at Jason's side. " I aint gonna shoot ya. Stop yellin that shit.", Barney said. Jason busted out laughing. " Only cause you ain't got but one damn bullet. Andy dont trust ya with no more!", he yelled in "Barney's" face, laughing even harder than before

HEY LOOOK ARE ME I'S AND CUCKCOCK ALL DAYS DERRRRR HUH HUH HUH GKUG GLUG GIMME YOUR SPERM CELL!

My sig got edited to match my overly shitty behavior so now I can play tough guy asshole IC anywhere I go. Except at home where my mother will beat my o-ring to keep me in line.