(08-04-2017, 07:03 AM)Super Mario Said: ok everybody I've taken your advice and...here is what I've come and boiled it down to:

most everybody in their story writing the stories are long, drawn out epic adventures which engage you into their lives which is awesome in every sense of the words

but if you as a kid ever watch stuff like the super show (with me played by the Late Captain Lou Albano Luigi was Danny Wells) the stories are usually short and funny little live action comedy segments and I am wondering if short and funny can translate to a good Impressive story in an r.p here just the same as everybody else's long story styles if so then I would prefer that as I can put more effort into that better than I can anything else I like to think.

opinions welcome everybody please you guys are helping to shape the direction I wanna go so thank you.

Not every story has to be long. Most RPs are on the spectrum of 1500-2500 words, and given the current length of your RPs I'd shoot for 1500. It allows you to set the scene, really describe what your characters are going through, etc. Length isn't everything of course, but you need enough words to describe what's happening. Guppy Parsh in particular is one of our best comedy writers, and if you want to go in that direction I'd read some of his stuff.

In addition, you need to clean up your grammar, punctuation, capitalization, etc. If you're on Chrome, I'd recommend downloading the Grammarly add-on, it should be able to help you while you look over your RPs. Good grammar and such might not be the highest thing on the judging spectrum, but it makes your RPs that much easier to read, and may even be the turning point in a deadlock.