Your roleplays seem a little rushed. Once you're done writing, I'd suggest taking some time away from the piece and then reviewing it. This will help you correct punctuation errors, you tend to not close your quotation marks. You also miss out on some capitalisation.

Color coding is also good, pick a color for your action texts, pick a color for your speech and pick a color for other people's speech.

Also, feel free to add more action to your character, what he's doing. Mario twirls his stache for instance, or does a cute little jump with one hand in the air. These things make it easier to visualise as we read your work.