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Thaddeus Duke · (11-16-2016)

Friday, December 25, 2015 | 2:49 AM Local Time | The Vatican

King Asmodeus.

If you ask him, it has a nice ring to it. His coronation was short and sweet, with no fanfare. Sebastian Duke graciously handed over his crown and his royal robes to his father, the rightful King of the Illuminatus. It’s not a position he really ever wanted, yet doctrine is what he respects. If it’s in the founding documents, who is he to break tradition?

In Saint Peter’s Basilica, well wishers (mostly Illuminatus) file passed him, kneeling to kiss his ring making him extremely uncomfortable. ”Is this really necessary?” he whispers to Matthew, standing next to throne.

”It’s in the document. Many of the Illuminatus customs and rituals were completely ripped off by the Church from these documents,” Matthew answers insistingly.

”Wonderful,” the King retorts in a sarcastic tone. ”How many more?”

”Perhaps a few hundred. Maybe more.”

”End this now, Matthew. I have important matters to handle. After that I’d like to get some sleep.”

Matthew considers the Kings request, knowing full well Asmodeus had a full day running Germany, not to mention the terror in the skies as they tried to avoid being blown apart by a rogue missile. Luckily, protection protocol requires two identical planes taking to the skies to avoid exactly that sort of thing. He knows his boss is thoroughly exhausted.

”Gentlemen,” Matthew says, stepping down the steps of the altar. ”We apologize for the inconvenience but we’ll have to resume this in the morning. The King has had a very long, exhausting day and there’s still some work he must do before he can retire for the evening.

“Again, we apologize, but we must end this now. Go on to your bunks, your homes, your tents. The King will resume at 10 AM,” he explains. Some groan, but most nod their heads in agreement. All make their way towards the exits.

”what is it you’d like to do?”

”I need to be on the television,” states the tired King as he slowly rises from the throne. ”I get any weaker we’ll have to install a lift chair to the throne,” the King jokes, not really like him at all.

”Do you feel its important to go on the television tonight?”

”I made promises when we declared war. I made promises when we staged the coup in Germany.

“They’re promises I intend to keep, Matthew. Get me on the television quickly.”

”Might it be better to wait until the world is awake, your Highness? You can go on the television, but no one will be paying attention.”

”Ah! My boy. You are perhaps the most intelligent young man I have ever laid my eyes on,” Asmodeus compliments.

”Such kind words, sir. And I...”

”Which begs the question,” the King interjects. ”How can you be so stupid?

“You see, this is Christmas. The Holiest of days in the Catholic realm. Their capital has fallen into enemy hands. It’s all over the news. It’s huge news.

“They’re watching.

“Those that aren’t, will watch it on repeat on news outlets the world over. I assure you, Matthew, they’re watching.

“Get me on the television within the hour.”

King Asmodeus sits upon his throne on the altar of Saint Peter. Behind him, Illuminatus banner flags are lined up. One stationary camera faces the King. Bright lights shine upon him. Thaddeus and Sebastian Duke flank him on either side as Matthew converses with the CNN crew.

”Your Highness, you go live to the world in Five.

“Four.

“Three.”

Two.

One.

Point.

”Citizens of the world, I bid you good day,” he begins.

”I come to you tonight, not as a conqueror, not as an enemy of so many, but as an ally. I come as a man seeking peace between my people, and all people around the world. At the onset of this conflict we were forced to do some unsavory things and I assure you, I have paid for them deeply on the inside. So much so, that it has touched my very soul.

“Death is not something I ever wanted for the good people in this world. Germany was a necessary launching point for our ultimate goal, and that was to take back the home that is rightfully ours. In doing so, we have undoubtedly left a trail of destruction in our wake.

“When my regime took over in the wonderful nation of Germany I promised then, that once our mission was completed, we would in fact return Germany to its rightful government. On my orders, I have a team en route to Germany in order to facilitate a peaceful transition.

“We invaded Poland. That conflict was over in an instant. Death and destruction followed as any conflict will. Since their surrender, we have made peace. We are paying for the reconstruction efforts there, just as we will here in Italy.

“You may find it difficult to believe, but we do want peace. We want peace with the Catholic Church for our time and all time. It is my deepest desire, regardless of hurt feelings and the atrocities committed by both of our sides, to open avenues of communication between us. Only through diligent diplomacy, can we ever achieve a lasting peace. It is neither financially, nor morally viable, to keep up this bitter war.

“It is with the utmost respect and the heaviest of hearts, that I wish Catholics and those of all faiths around the world, a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays,” he concludes.

”We’re out,” Matthew states.

”Peace at any price. Is that the new Illuminatus mantra?” Thaddeus jokes. To which, his father slaps him in the back of the head, knocking his crown to the floor.

”War can not be sustained, kid. You’re no doubt a natural leader, but you have so much to learn.”

”Matthew, help me to my room. I am beyond tired.”

The scene switches to an XWF show in Venice, Italy as part of the world tour, with Steve Sayors standing in the center of the ring.

”Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time, is the son of a legend, THADDEUS DUKE!”

March or Die by Motorhead begins to play as the arena darkens. Spot lights ignite on stage engulfing Illuminatus soldiers in white light. They march forward with the marching beat of March or Die. Another light ignites in the center of it all, engulfing Thaddeus Duke in white light. He’s not dressed to compete. He’s wearing a pair of Wrangler jeans and black t-shirt with red lettering that is too difficult to make out in the ultra bright light.

James Edwards, Duke’s head of security, dressed in his traditional leather bomber, leads the young man to the ring. The duo march toward the ring as Duke’s soldiers part like the red sea allowing him to pass. Duke and Edwards climb the ring steps and step through the ropes.

”Thaddeus Duke, who is this man to your right?”

”His name is James Edwards. He’s a lieutenant in my military and also serves as the head of my security detail.

“Are you going to interest me or is this going to bore the good people of Venice?”

”Forgive me, Thaddeus, but I was not expecting you to come out here dressed… like this… Your father...”

Thaddeus cuts him off. ”You’re not talking to my father, moron. Did you expect me to come out here walking like a fucking mindless drone, dressed in all black and brooding beneath a fucking hood?

“With all due respect to my father… he was lame.”

”Well, I.. I...”

”Don’t stutter jackass, it’s unprofessional.”

”Can you explain the shirt you’re wearing? It says Stop the Universal Oppression.”

”Thomas Nixon is in a fight to stop the oppression of lizard folk. That’s great and all, but I’m in a fight too. See, Scully has been the top champion of the XWF for several months now and only this week will he have his first title defense.”

”Thomas Nixon is one of your...”

”Shut the fuck up, Sayors. I’m trying to answer your idiotic question.

“Anyhow, Peter Gilmore will face the Universal Champion on Savage and if you’ll look at the back, read it for the people bitch.”

”Pete 4 Champ.

“Why Peter? Regardless of the winner, the title will be defended at Wild Card Weekend!”

”I don’t really care who the champion is as long as it’s not Scully.

“Gilmour.

“Unknown Soldier.

“John Madison can get his head out of his ass, make a come back and win it.

“I don’t give two shits who is the champion as long as it isn’t Scully.”

”What is your problem with...”

”I told you.

“Scully has been holding that title hostage for nearly four months. Not a single title defense until now. He’s ducked title challenges. He’s blamed Vince Lane for not booking him in title matches. Hell, he’s even ducked a non-title challenge from a rookie.

“Scully is a bitch.

“If you look up the definition of coward in the dictionary, it has no words. Just a picture of your Universal Champion. You see, on Savage, when Scully loses the title to Gilmour, the championship automatically gains prestige. Why? Because that cock sucking

Scully no longer has it. Because once again, the roster of the Xtreme Wrestling Federation has the top title being defended on a regular basis again.”

”You’re fresh off a win against Luca Arzegotti. This week you compete against Thomas Nixon and Michael Graves. Your thoughts?”

”My thoughts?

“This interview is lame. Michael Graves, that’s why no one does these kinds of promos. They’re lame. They’re boring. They’re a cliché.

“Michael Graves calls himself the Franchise. Are you the corner stone of this company? Do you draw the crowds, Graves? You’re a god damn newcomer. Same as me. The difference between you and I, Graves, is that I win and you don’t.

“Is there a word that is the opposite of Franchise?”

”I don’t know. I didn’t bring my thesaurus for this one.”

”It was a rhetorical question.

“Because that’s what Graves is. The Franchise is the embodiment of success. Michael Graves is not that.

“How’s that for a lame wrestling interview?”

Duke and company quickly depart to a mixed reaction from the Venice crowd.

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