[bwo][/bwo]


[bwo][/bwo]



Dusk was settling in as a lone luchadora approached the isolated cantina. The woman in the colorful mask slides her left hand across the brim of her red, white, and green straw hat. Loud conversation spills out from the cantina as LSM steps through the doors. The bar fell silent as every bandito turned towards her. The tallest and heaviest bandito, decked out from boot to sombrero in jet black, stepped off of his bar stool as he spoke in Robyn’s direction.

“What are you doing here, técnico?”

“Calm down, El Vaquero Oscuro- I’m not here to tie your little gang up into one big pretzel again. I’m looking for someone."

The luchadora reached into her duster and pulled out a wanted poster from Sheriff Lane’s office.



[bwo][/bwo]




“I’m after El Diablo Rico. I know it’s his gang that supplies the drogas you smuggle across the border.”

“We don’t know anything.”

“Cut the act, Oscure. There’s a billion dollars wrapped around this man’s waist. He champions Anarchy and spreads chaos with every step he takes. A figure like that doesn’t just run around these parts inconspicuously. Now where is his hideout? What kind of longarm is he carrying?”

El Vaquero Oscure shrugs nonchalantly, giving nothing away.

“We can do this the easy way or we can do this the hard way. I know that you know. I just need you to tell me what it IS that I know that you know!”

“¡Captura a esa perra!”

At their leader’s command the banditos immediately bumrush LSM.


KAPOW!

The first bandito is slapped to the floor with a big right hand!


WABAM!

The second bandito eats a spinning elbow that knocks his front teeth out!


WASCHA!

The third bandito flies into the liquor cabinet after a spinning roundhouse kick to the face!


LSM turns around in a freestyle wrestling stance, ready to take on the rest of these assholes: but to her surprise she sees nothing BUT the behinds of the rest of the gang as they scurry out of the cantina! Two men go running through the door. Another two men hurled their bodies out of the open-air windows. The luchadora can’t help but laugh as she turns to face the last ruffian left.

“Jajajajajajaja! Well well well, my old foe, all your friends have lef-”

El Vaquero Oscure doesn’t stick around to hear the woman’s speech. Instead, he ducks right past the luchadora and runs out the door! The woman runs after the banditos, but by the time she steps outside the outlaws have already mounted their horses and made their escape.

“¡Mierda!”

The frustrated luchadora walks back into the cantina and starts flipping over tables and knocking bottles off the wall. She searches for a clue. A hint. Anything that would tell her something more about the criminal leader she was searching for. She went behind the bar and started pulling open every cabinet and drawer she could find.

She reached into the open drawer and pulled out a fat stack of papers. The top page was a copy of the very same wanted poster she came here with. She flipped the page over and discovered an incredibly in-depth intelligence report on “Money” Oswald.

“¡Bendita Santa María!”

Apparently these rudos had the same idea as her- track down the billion dollar champion and collect that bounty on his waist. Robyn grinned from ear to ear as she sat down and studied every word in the file.

“¡Esto es bueno! ¡Que bien! This match-up couldn’t be more favorable for me! Each and every one of his weaknesses is one of my biggest strengths!

According to this report he is “no es muy técnico y le cuesta salir de las presentaciones”. ¡Fantástico! No wonder the men upstairs sent me to collect that billion dollar championship bounty- I’m literally Oswald’s kryptonite!

Oswald isn’t a skilled technician.

I’m the most technical técnico on this side of the Rio Grande!

Oswald is a self-trained brawler who has no idea how to get out of advanced submission maneuvers.

I am LITERALLY a human submission machine.

Oswald relies on sheer physicality to get by in the XWF- but I’m FASTER, more AGILE, and literally HALF HIS AGE! I had no idea he was so viejo! He should be a grandfather by now! How many forty year old men are able to run as fast, jump as high, and punch as hard as they could fifteen years ago?


Oswald’s riding high on this one last run for glory. He’s feeling good and feeling confident- but so were Elijah Martin and Junior. But Oswald has belts those two will never be able to touch. Belts of Anarchy and belts of Billions.

But me? I too have a belt. A belt that Oswald will never be able to touch. A black belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Oswald’s golden plates are definitely nice, but they’re not permanent- I can take them away. My black belt is forever. Oswald’s belt means that he is the man to beat- for now. My belt means that I am the woman who WILL make you submit- forever and always.

When we square off Oswald’s belt count will half and mine will double. He’s only the man to beat until I beat him- but I will always be the woman with limitless armbars and merciless guillotines! I have armbars a LOT stronger than Centurion’s, that’s for sure! While Cent did a number on big dummy’s arm, he forgot to dig the heel of his boot into the armpit! He messed up, he forgot the best armbar tricks!

Don’t worry Centurion, I’ll finish him with the armbar just for you. I’m fresher than morning dew on grass after my easy win on Anarchy, but Oswald’s in ROUGH shape! His arm is barely hanging on anymore! That makes my job all the easier. When I finally track down Oswald he’s going to have no choice to submit.

Because


I AM


THE


LATINA


SUBMISSION


MACHINA!”