XWF Headquarters: WARFARE Offices: Tuesday

There’s a knock against the plexiglass window adorned with a 'Applications' placard. On one side, a young woman sits amidst the monotonous glow of fluorescent lights, idly toying with her fingers, a veil of boredom draping her features.

The persistent knocking echoes, but the lethargic administrative staffer remains unmoved.

"The entrance is on the right, Miss Waters," a voice chides.

"Well, sugar, I ain't got no badge..."

Dolly's Southern drawl dances a bit heavier than usual in the air.

"I'll just buzz you in," the admin mumbles, stirring from her ennui to press the door-release button.

"Can't sport a badge 'cause I don't work here—yet."

The woman stares blankly, a piece of paper slides through the slot in the plexiglass.

Dolly, with her bald head gleaming and vibrant pink eyeshadow accentuating her eyes, stands out like a beacon of audacity, her flamboyant earrings swinging with each movement.

"I'm submitting a roster application."

The admin inhales deeply, her eyes flicking to the paper before her.

"Miss Waters, this is your application," she states, exasperation peeking through.

"I know, honey! Put my heart into this," she gushes, a mix of emotions bubbling up as she trembles with joy, one hand over her mouth, the other shooing away tears. "Pardon my tears, just overwhelmed," she sobs, snorting a laugh. "Can't believe it's real!"

"No, Miss Waters. This is literally your application—" the admin interrupts, holding up the paper for Dolly to see. "And you've crossed out your name and written 'Misty Waters.'"

"Yes! Updated the bio a tad, love!"

"And what would you like me to do with this?"

"Well, darling, I'm here to go through the application process and sign a contract."

"You're already under contract, Miss Waters."

"On the contrary, Misty Waters isn't bound by any wrestling contracts. I'm a free agent!"

"You can't have multiple XWF contracts at once, Miss Waters," the admin states flatly, sliding the application back and returning to her idle finger play.

"That's okay! There's only one Misty Waters registering for XWF."

"You are under contract, ma'am, as Dolly Waters."

"No dear, you misunderstand. Dolly is no more. I am Misty Waters, Dolly's grandmother."

Despite the accent shift, it's unmistakably Dolly Waters.

"Another 'Dolly's on Drugs' gimmick?" she mutters, peering at her fingers. "Predictable."

"Alright, I've been patient, but I'd like to speak to your manager."

“You know the way to his office better than I do, Miss Waters…” Dolly stands, a scowl on her face as the door emits an unpleasant noise. “...that’s me buzzing you in.”

"I swear, these lazy millennials."

“Gen Z”

"It's all the same!"

Dolly strides to the heavy office door, swinging it open as the buzzing ceases behind her. The corridor ahead is lined with cubicle dividers, leading to a door at the end labeled: "Thaddeus Duke - Warfare General Manager."

"Well, looks like the Duke prince has finally ascended the throne."

Dolly murmurs and chuckles to herself before knocking on the door.

"It’s open."

A muffled voice of Thad Duke responds from the other side.

Dolly pushes the door open, her eyes wide at the opulent decorative setting of the XWF Management suites. "Oh—" , she's taken aback by the lavishness around her. "Mr. Warfare General Manager, indeed!

It should be changed to Executive Director, yet they persist, Dear Sister.

[dolly]”But what a war room!"

"Don’t get too caught up in the decor, Dolly. I’ve got a flight to New York—" he hurries, grabbing a backpack. "So, whatever this is, Dolly, make it quick."

"Oh, but that's the thing, darling."

Dolly reaches out, pulling Thad by the sleeve as he tries to pass by.

"Darling? Since when do you say darling? Why do you sound strange?" he chuckles, struggling to hold back laughter as he gets a full glimpse of Dolly’s bald skull and makeup caked face,

"My goodness, look at you!" Dolly exclaims, eyeing Thad directly now. "Sebastian Duke's young prince, all grown up."

Thad appears utterly confused. Still struggling to hold back laughter listening to Dolly sound so hick.

"Uh, I don't know how you expect me to respond to that, but I really have to go, Dolly."

"Wait, wait, though! That’s the thing." She tugs at him again, presenting her roster application. "I'm not Dolly, sugar." Thad takes the application, studying it with curiosity.

"Misty? Why are you changing your name to Misty?"

Dolly's expression shifts, becoming blank and direct.

"Because I am Misty Waters. Dolly is gone."

Thad shakes his head wearily in exhaustion. "You know..." he chuckles, "you were supposed to have been dominating the XWF by now."

"Yer' telling me! That's why Misty had to intervene, darling."

Thad runs his fingers through his hair in frustration, gazing down at his close friend, Dolly, who is now claiming to be Misty Waters. "So, have you finally lost it? For good?"

"Oh, beloved..." Dolly's heartbreak is evident on her face. "You care so deeply for her." She caresses a hand on Thad's cheek.

Thad removes Dolly's hand with a pointed gaze. "You've one of my best friends in this industry for a decade, a sister to me." Dolly's eyes spot a framed photo on the wall—a selfie taken with Doc, Corey, Duke, and Dolly, hugging each other. Her eyes light up with familiarity, with trust and with opportunity. 

"I care that you're going through all of this madness."

Dolly steps back, turning her head to the floor in a smiling contemplation.

Look me directly in the eyes. Tell me that you aren’t actually losing it, Dolly.

"Losing it? Hasn't our sweet Dolly always lost it? Time after time, opportunity after opportunity squandered away? There will be no more 'losing it,' I can assure you of that."

Thad watches Dolly closely, examining her demeanor.

Call it madness, baby, because it is! Misty Waters is the madness that’s going to smash through the XWF like a wrecking-ball-YEAH! Cemented as the greatest wrestler in the history of this business- YEAH!

"I just want what's best for you, what's best for Dolly."

" I'm the best thing that could ever happen to Dolly! Professional wrestling for Misty Waters runs thicker than blood, delves deeper than the soul. It's the madness that transcends cosmic rifts and binds the universe!" 

"No one in the XWF will be able to withstand me, Thad. My decades of experience and skill, combined with this vessel of my bloodline's youthful prime? Dolly didn't want this gift. It was always my gift to her, Memaw Misty’s gift. Dolly did everything she could to ruin it! So Misty stopped her.

Thad senses that Dolly is putting on a performance, despite her efforts to embody her grandmother's character. Deep down, he feels Dolly's presence. His concern for her mental state is overshadowed by the hilarity, and signs of encouragement. Dolly has potential to reach great heights in XWF, but for nine years, Duke has witnessed his best friend falter in big moments.

"I've seen you take down two of the XWF's biggest legends in one night. I witnessed you lead my LFL franchise to the brink of a championship. Witnessed you with the Uni in your grasp. But I’ve seen you lose dumb matches with no effort. Watched you flutter in and out of the XWF on meth-benders. Impressing me countless times, making me believe in false promises. If "Misty" is offering what I always believed Dolly could be, then "Misty" it is. I hope your intentions match your performance."

Dolly grins mischievously and gestures to the ceiling, twirling around the room.

"Let's get a contract signed."

Our people will be in touch with a proposal. But since your… body, was still on contract for a match on Warfare, you’ll be required to wrestle next week.

The sooner the better!

Just promise me that Misty is going to do something with that bald head.

Just another gift that Dolly squandered.

But don't worry, Thad.

If it’s one thing Misty Waters ain’t gonna’ do,- she whispers the next bit - its lack in style- ooooh yeah she winks




There’s a slow motion reel of the most eighties looking, tassel lined leather jacket that’s ever been seen in motion. It’s gold trimmed along a color homage to old glory, matching a Cowboy hat fitting over red hair, a tall pair of white framed, blue-lensed Ray Bans meeting the bill of the hat. Pomp and Circumstance predominates the slow images of a young woman raising her arms, pointing at a crowd we can’t see, spinning around, enthused and  motioning for a belt around her waist. The image settles in on the back of her jacket as she walks forward into blinding spotlight, the jacket reads:

Misty
Waters

Ooooh yeeeaah!

A thick southern drawl calls out, as the figure materializes in front of a patriotic backdrop,

It’s Misty Madness time!




She removes her hat, revealing herself to be Dolly Waters, wearing a decadent, yet obviously red wig. She does another spin around, pointing to the XWF logo on the backdrop behind her. Arriving in the frame is a microphone carried by none other than XWF’s own, Steve Sayors, wearing a suit and bowtie.

“And here she is, folks! The, ahem” - Sayors pauses to look down at a cue card in is palm “The self proclaimed “Newest Star in the XWF- The Refined Rebel- Dolly Wa-”

No, no, no Stevie Wonder, yer’ Stevie Sayors, so you can see- YEAH!

With her back turned to the camera addressing Steve Sayors, she points a thumb over her shoulder, to the sequence written name on the back of her jacket.

You can read the name, loud and clear, because there’s no one in the XWF who could ever replicate the power of Misty Waters, Mean-Steve!

You ain’t just watching any ordinary new wrestler making their debut this Saturday-Oh no, no, nooo Mean Steve. You’re in fer’ a treat, sugar!

Let me tell you something, lemme tell you something right now! - you’re watching the future of the XWF! The one destined to bring greatness! Stepping into the ring, yeah, sweeter than Southern tea but hotter than an Appalachian wildfire!

It’s the Misty Madness- THE REFINED REBEL BELLE BABY she flexes YEAH!

“But you’ll have to pardon me, uh- “Misty”, because it seems like I’m going to be watching Dolly Waters face off against Bulk Logan on Warfare, as you are in fact, Dolly Waters”

You don’t get it Stevie-

Nobody gets it- YEAH!

Her voice goes lower, almost a whisper

Dolly Waters was a waste of raw talent the universe over, a waste of time, a waste of space, a waste of the god given, blue blooded, american true, rebel yellin’ gifts she inherited- and we can all be lucky that we never have to witness her put it to waste again.

Mean-Steve Sayors, YEAH

I’ll say a lot of things-Yeah, I’ll say the things that the wrestling industry ain’t ready to hear.

I’ll say something to you, Steve Sayors, and you can say it to the world yeah - There’s no more Dolly.

And she ain’t never comin back again! she raises her voice again,

Misty Waters is captaining this ship! And I’m everything my granddaughter wished she were.

“I’m sorry, you said granddaughter?”

Misty Waters is dominant, Mean Steve! She’s calculating! She’s the heir apparent to the old Kentucky wrestling territories, ready to unleash the Misty Madness! The Misty Monarchy right here in the XWF! She’s gonna turn the landscape of the industry on its head-YEAH!, and doing it while looking just as flashy, and even prettier, than a lightning bug in a Ju-ly thunderstorm.

“I guess it doesn’t appear that you need any convincing about “Misty” Waters, nor could you be swayed otherwise- so then I ask this, “Misty”: what do you say about your opponent for Warfare, Bulk Logan? A man who was just narrowly defeated in a grueling XTreme Championship match against Corey Black, and is determined to get back on a winning track? How do you suggest Bulk Logan reacts to facing off against “Misty” Waters rather than Dolly Waters?”

If he knows what's good for em, Bulk Logan will wise up! React with a little more headedness than the rest of you doubting the power of the Refined Rebel, Mean Steve.

See, I look at a man like Bulk Logan, and look at a man willing to walk last week’s problem’s into the ring-yeah. And Bulk Logan bringing last week’s problems to the ring is this week’s boon for Misty Waters. I see a man in Bulk Logan who doesn’t understand why the fans would turn their backs on him- and he’ll do anything to win them back over- yeah.

But see Bulk Logan, she turns from Sayors now, removing her sunglasses, and looking into the camera, a frightening intensity in her wild eyes, her voice influxing In you I see a man who’s gonna know the power of Misty Madness is true, BECAUSE YOU’RE GONNA” FEEL IT FIRST HAND!

In the debut match of the Refined Rebel Misty Waters, Broke Logan is going to limp into that ring wearing ego bruises, a broken man, worried about losing the match, worried about losing the little Bulksters in Colorado, and he’s gonna’ feel the power- oh yeah! The power of being caught in the Running, the Rolling, the Rippling Waters - the undeniable force that is The Misty Madness, and Bulk Logan! And yer’ never gonna’ forget it!

Yer’ gonna’ remember- YEAH!

Remember the POWER - YEAH!

Yer’ gonna’ remember how to be a hero again, Logan-  be that All American, pure blooded force that is Bulkimania running wild- YEAH!

The Madness is gonna’ guide Bulkimania out of its state of ridicule. Setting the example of how to wear the shine of power. 

Yer’ too fractured now, Bulk. You've forgotten what it means. But yer’ gonna’ see it yeah, see it first hand when the smaller, more talented, more charismatic Misty Waters makes you run laps around the ring, pissing down yer' leg Bulk! Yer’ gonna’ remember then- yeah!

And after the beating, and the boo-hooing, and the commiserations, when The Madness has smashed the rest of this poser Bulkster down with the worms- the real power of Bulkmania will arise!

It’s real recognizing real Bulk- YEAH!

Yer’ gonna’ feel the cosmic shift, the universes collapsing, feel the madness and the mania together. A Force of Mega Powers so undeniable that the XWF will be flung into a space vortex! Oooh Yeeeah!

“Are you suggesting that after you defeat Bulk Logan, that he’ll then want to join forces with you? "Misty"?”

Bulk Logan is a true American! A freaky, muscle juice running, blond headed, blue eyed gift that god gave the wrestling world, Mean-Steve. He’s everything that wrestling used to stand for: sexism, simplicity, strength, spray tans, the american flag, and god! And look at me, Mean-Steve, The Refined Rebel Belle, Misty the madness Waters! But not just the madness.

It’s Misty the mind-yeah!

See, I ain’t just here to dominate the XWF with victories and championship reigns. That’s just a given. The Misty Madness means more- it’s going to steer the XWF on a power trip of financial success like it’s never rode before. They’ll build monuments to honor what’s about to be accomplished now that The Madness is here! Together, Bulkamania and Misty Madness- the unstoppable Mega Powers- it’s only the beginning- YEAH!

“But “Misty”, what if Bulk doesn’t feel these supposed Mega Powers you speak of? What if he just sees Dolly Waters in a red wig, and rejects this offer?”

Questions, questions, but not questions for the Refined Rebel, there’s only one man who can answer that question, Mean Steve.

You don’t know Misty Waters yet, Bulk Logan, but I know a little something or two about you, yeah, I know you might have the five most impressive moves in professional wrestling at your disposal, but what you don’t know is that Misty Waters was raised on tradition, and tenacity, yeah, with the strength of my southern roots and the fire of a thousand summer suns!

So go ahead and answer that question Bulk, what WILL happen if you don’t feel the power? What if you don’t have faith, yeah, what if you don’t leap into Misty Madness, yeah?

“I believe it is you, “Misty” Waters, who has the questions to answer. How do you expect anyone to believe that you’re not Dolly Waters?”

Her eyes sharpened with intensity, her body shaking as she grasps at the air, squeezing her fists. The camera zooming on her face, I’ll say it one more time, for the non-believers in the XWF and all around the universe, YEAH-

Dollymania-

IS DEAD!

And Bulkamania will be dead too if he refuses this offer!

Does that answer yer’ question, Mean Steve?

“If I’m to take at your word, that you are in fact not Dolly Waters- take you at your word that you actually are this “Madness” you speak of- this “Refined Rebel” Misty Waters- Then what exactly are you planning to do to Bulk Logan if he refuses to join your “Mega Powers”?

She lets out a little chuckle, nodding her head and grasping her fist like she’s clutching an invisible object before grabbing ahold of her wrist and spinning her fist around.

Bulk Logan can ride the wave of the Madness as the Mega Powers, and leap to our destiny, YEAH, the destiny of ruling the roost, YEAH!

Or he can find himself, broken and sold, trading in his yellow and red for the black and white, like some dirty communist. Lost, and owned by Hollywood baby killers, yeah. Ready to let all that’s wrong with professional wrestling sink their teeth into him.

He can walk into that ring with yesterday’s problems, thinking he’s fighting against yesterday’s wrestler Dolly Waters, and not the spirit of the South, the spirit of tradition, the spirit of professional wrestling, that’s when the Misty Madness will lock in my Rippling Waters so tight, he’ll wish he stayed on the muscle beach drinking steroid smoothies, oooooh yeah!

Bulk can get back to losing to woke beta males like Corey Black, disgracing the glory of the flag, falling further and further, or he can be side by side the Madness in the Vatican City, Yeah!

After Warfare, the whole XWF is gonna’ have the faith, yeah,

After I tap you out and shake yer’ hand Bulk Logan, you’ll have the faith too

Yer all gonna leap into The Madness, yeah, when The Refined REBEL Misty Waters has her arm raised in the Vatican City- not to hold onto the case, no, but to cement my destiny that very night, oooh yeah!

“Wait a just a moment, are you implying that YOU, “Misty” Waters intend to-”

[dolly]That’s right!

I’m callin my shot!

After I beat this shell of a man, Bulk Logan, and revive the real Bulkamania, it’ll be The Misty Madness rewriting the history books. I’ll be the only thing worshiped at Mass that Sunday in the Vatican City, when I leave Leap of Faith as the new Universal Champion!

So let it be a moment of Pomp and Circumstance for you too Bulk Logan. Let Misty remind you of the true Mega Powers on Warfare, and leap with the Madness. Or you can get used to losing for a long time, yeah, longer than yer’ hairline Bulk Logan, and most importantly you’ll lose the faith.

Misty Waters never lost faith!

It’s been a long time coming, but I’ve finally made it to the XWF, and I ain’t taking any prisoners. There’s a show to steal Bulk Logan, yeah, and yer’ either with The Madness, or yer’ beneath The Refined Rebel Misty Waters! And

YER’ GONNA DIG IT!

Oooooh yeaaaah!!!!

She raises her arms in the air, whittling her fingers on the way up in front of Sayors’ face, then points at the sky and spins out of the picture, shouting with excitement from an increasing distance.

“There you have it folks. On the final episode of Weekend Warfare we will see the “debut” of The Macho Doll “Misty” Waters- who is clearly none other than Dolly Waters.

Nonetheless, she has called her shot at Bulk Logan, and even offered him a partnership if she wins! Punching her ticket to the Leap of Faith match. But could “Misty’s” claims be true? Is Dolly Waters gone forever, traded out for a future megastar in the XWF to take her place?

Or is “Misty” Waters simply too maddening to believe?”

Have faith

Faith in what?! Dolly cries out, her voice trembling as tears stream down her face, her jaw rattling with each heartbeat.

Faith in your blood, my dear.

The usually serene and soft-spoken tarot reader, Madame Maluna, spoke with an intensity that pierced the air. Her face contorted into a rare, skin-cracking scowl. It’s the only way to stop this madness! she pleaded, her tone authoritative as she stomped toward Dolly across the broken floors of her metaphysics shop.

Dolly took deep breaths to quell her sobs, leaning against the shattered frame of the building. Her arm, cigarette still in hand, dangled outside, marking the spot where her dear friend Patel Gagandeep had been critically injured in an explosion earlier that year.

I tried to warn you, my dear! It's too late now; we cannot dwell on it. We must take action!

Previously, Maluna had warned Dolly about what Patel had discovered months ago. A cult of elite wrestling power brokers, The Seers, had been targeting Dolly’s cursed blood in a bizarre conspiracy involving Vincent Lane and his henchman Michael Graves.

This goes beyond a promise you made to a friend, my dear. This is about breaking free from this curse and honoring the man who sacrificed his life for you! They tried to kill you again last night- she said, referring to Dolly’s TLC match against Vincent Lane at The Revelry, and now- Maluna gasped, fighting back sobs, -they’ve finished the job on our dear Patel.

Patel was found dead just this morning, in the hospital where he had been recovering from the explosion for months. His death, by sudden asphyxiation, was currently under investigation.

What do I do? she asked, her tone lifeless, her eyes wide and distant as she imagined her friend Patel dying alone, without regard. Dolly would do whatever it took to stop this madness.

Just have faith, my dear.

Maluna took Dolly’s palm, looking her straight in the eye. But Dolly’s eyes evaded her, staring off into the setting sun behind the rusty cityscape.

What’s gonna’ happen next? There was an eerie hint of acceptance in Dolly’s tone.
Maluna produced an ancient paring knife, like something you’d find buried in the Appalachian foothills. She traced the dull blade over the long crease in Dolly’s palm, the one running circularly around her thumb joint.

The blade pressed down. Dolly flinched, a light gasp escaping her lips as her eyes squeezed shut, pushing a tear to the corner of her eye.

The Seers will never see your blood again, Maluna moaned, her head nodding, almost drunkenly. She slowly pulled back and carved down Dolly’s jerking palm, her hand running red with Dolly’s blood.

They’ll never see.

They’ll never see.

They’ll never see.

I’ll never see.

Last night

Patel Gagandeep’s eyes fluttered open into darkness. His heart raced in a swirl of confusion and pain. He had been comatose, barely alive since January. The first thing he heard were memories of the explosion, his own blood-curdling screams, as if it were happening seconds ago. But there was an unmistakable presence he felt lingering near him, quieting the memories but heightening his pain. He began groaning aloud in this hospital room blotted in darkness. His body and mind so damaged, he tried to muster,

It’s you,

before even his open eyes could see through the smothering darkness. Instead, only gentle gasps and chokes were heard.

2x KWA Unified Southern Glory Champion
6x KWA Middleweight Champion
4x KWA Tag Team Champion
1x XWF XTreme Champion


-Dumb Dolly records that no one cares about-

3x XTreme Champion
2x Tag Team Champion (w/ Vita Valenteen, w/ Charlie Nickles)
2x Hart Champion
3x Television Champion

3x Star Of The Month
August ‘21, May ‘17, October ‘16

3x RP Of The Month
What light through sonder... my perception breaks.
Tranquility: For Old Times Sake
Manifest Victory