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Unknown Soldier · (11-26-2016)

Hillary looks back down at Soldier, who was still awaiting to be dosed in flames and 'fireboarded' to the end of kingdom come and super mega ultra tortured. He smiled thinking about those words to himself and just how awesome they were and the sweet pain of pure torture that he may be soon receiving He had closed his eyes giving Hillary and the rest of her goons ample time to attack and go back to torturing him, but unfortunately it would be to no avail since another distraction had caught the eye of Mrs. Clinton. She heard the commotion rattling in the background of the torture chamber room where all of them had been startled by the sound of the door about to open. Suddenly, it does fly open and behind it is a sight for sore eyes. Well certainly sore eyes for Mrs. Clinton as standing before her now was her husband, Bill Clinton.

Standing next to him was Soldier's tag team partner, Doctor Louis D'ville. If it were physically possible to look any more enraged and thoroughly pissed then Hillary had ever looked in her adult life and throughout all these promos this week, most likely now was that very instant. The look of fire dancing in her eyes as she opened her mouth to address her husband in the most vicious and forceful manner is most certainly that what can only describe pure evil. Doc stands by Bill's side, noticing Soldier strapped to the table. It then appears the two give each other a distinctive nod. Doc starts making hand gestures to Soldier about the two of them making and escaped exit. Soldier, not really reciprocating this information very well, assumes Doc is giving a hand job type of motion. To which Soldier winks back at him and immediately gets an enormous erection. Doc shakes his head dumbfounded but now sits in silence as Hillary and Bill begin to have an argument.

Hillary Clinton: "The hell are you doing here Bill!?!? I thought I told you to stay in the secretaries office until I was done with the election results."

Bill Clinton: "Aw Heil Hill-baby, you know the election's been over for almost two weeks now. It's time we all just accept that Donald Trump is our next president. Hell, who knows?!?! Maybe the guy will actually do a GREAT job! But rather than get into some big political rant like a Dolly Waters promo, I think it's best we just let the whole thing die. Did you hear, Donald isn't even going to prosecute you anymore so it's really not even that big of a deal that you lost. Heck, now we can just go back to robbing people blind through our own charity foundation with our daughter that isn't even really mine. Maybe we could even throw that black son of mine into the mix that we've been denying for years and then we can actually get some black votes next election! Will have him join that

Lives Matter movement or whatever. You know, a big reason why you lost was because of this entire population of voters we thought would side with us that did with Obama but didn't."

Hillary Clinton: "That's not even the reason I'm pissed anymore! Soldier left me, hubby! And no matter how hard I try and bust his balls just the same as I did to you behind closed doors all those years it doesn't seem to make any difference! He won't take me back!"

Bill Clinton looks down to finally see in the center of the room tied down to a waterboarding table is his wife's former lover Unknown Soldier. Soldier opens his eyes, then smiles, winks, and waves his dick out of the side of his underpants in Bill's general direction. This HOLY! pair of underpants being the only article of clothing he was wearing during this entire torturing escapade.

Bill Clinton: "Now you listen here, you nasty little mongrel, your going to keep satisfying my wife so I can keep having affairs with little girls like Dolly Waters and have my way with them as if I were in a Thaddeus Duke promo! Ya hear me!?!?!"

At that very moment, Doc runs over to Soldier's side as Bill and Hillary were very distracted in their conversation. He attempts to lure Soldier from the straps and out from the board. But Soldier refuses to budge as if he were too enthralled with Doc putting his hands all over him, or just too satisfied with the torturing he had been receiving from his ex girlfriend. Either way, Soldier wasn't moving a muscle, and eventually Bill and Hillary direct their attention back to Soldier on the water board torture device. Doc stands up like some kind of ninja bad ass Matrix Keanu Reeves type shit and snaps his fingers.

~~~~CRASH~~~~

Time instantaneously slows down immensely, and through the black and grey brick of the torture dungeon inside the statue of Liberty's vagina deep beneath the Clinton and SATAN! network headquarters. Comes barreling through the side of said bricks is a gigantic train, driven by the father of child rape himself, Bill Cosby! Doc then grabs Soldier around the waist, does a quadruple back flip, grabbing the side of the train at the same time, and whisking them both inside of it just in the nick of time before they would have been smashed as the train made it's way through the other part of the dungeon. Where these tracks must have come from is deep within the sewers and recesses beneath the New York city skyline, they still travel onward and onward as dark caverns beneath the city. I could have sworn I saw a sign that said Gringotts bank, but I can't be quite sure. Bill Cosby drives onward as Soldier and Doc fall into some side car, saved just in time to make their way to Warfare. Together as a team once again! The tag team mother fucking champions!

Unknown Soldier:

"Dolly Waters, typical teenage dirt bag piece of garbage that needs to get with the program. Spending too much time in front of the television watching wrestling when her father should have been shoving a stack of encyclopedias in her face. But instead she'd rather go searching through the XWF history books to find every tiny blemish on both myself and Doc's record. But let's just be honest here folks, the only reason she's stretching for any sort of revival such as this is because the bitch fucking idolizes every single time one of us even takes a shit. Because that's right, I took a big sloppy shit in that match where Luca pinned Ann Thraxx and I took a loss. Big deal sweetheart, now I actually have a tag team partner worth a damn. Which is little to say for you and your coke induced partner. I've been telling him for years that cocaine is just a pussy way to go about smoking meth, and look at me. I might have been out high on crystal methamphetamine all week, but I sure as fuck showed myself out here to the XWF fans more than his pale white ass did.

I'm also glad to see and so enthused that you watched me tear down Vinnie Lane to the point of him finally giving in and admitting I was right. I mean, did you see that exchange, Mrs. Waters? You see, that's me sticking up for the right thing here in XWF and not sitting back like a little girl, no offense, and taking it on the chin from some pink painted little pansy boy like Vinnie Lane. You did see, right, the point where I called him out for a match AFTER HE THREATENED ME and then he backed down. Then, I pointed out all his shitty flaws and he even came to agree with me, let me ref the fucking match anyways, and I still get whatever the fuck I want in the long run anyways! You stupid, stupid little cunt. I might be a whiny little bitch like Ghost Tank, but there's a big difference between me and him. I get what I fucking want!

You see, that's part of what having testicular fortitude is all about, but hey, I guess I can't blame you there darling since you got nothing dangling between your legs to show for. You see darling, all your arguments would be valid if you had a leg to fucking stand on. But you don't. Have you ever won Lethal Lottery?!?! Held a briefcase?!?! No you haven't, have you! So how the fuck are you going to dictate to me how, when, and where to cash in mine?!?! I think that's actually the beauty of it after all, the fact that I get to fucking choose whenever the time is to take what I want. When I want. Where I want. But you know what I want to take from you, this Warfare, is your innocence. I want great grand pappy Waters to sit in the front row and watch me violate his tiny little grand daughter in ways that would put a Thaddeus Duke promo to shame. I'm going to send a message to the entire Waters family this Wednesday night by raping their tiny little girl so hard, that the rest of them can feel it. That message will be loud and clear, that if they mess with me or team Doctor SATAN! ever again. That their butt holes will be bleeding for at least 666 days after. You envy me you dirty little teenage dirt bag. That's why you dug up my past and dressed up as me for Halloween. You're the one that needs to GROW UP or maybe get some better role models at least."

At that very moment Soldier rushes to the front of the train, tosses Bill Cosby out the side window of the driver's seat in the front of the train. Cosby immediately plunges to his death. Soldier then takes control of the train's steering devices and drives it right off the tracks. Doc sighs and snaps his fingers again and the scene goes completely black.

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