First Impressions Are Key

The Most Electric of All Boogaloos

Anyone have any thoughts on the character or the story I'm telling? My biggest concern is that I'm coming across as dull or something and if I am, please tell me. Thanks in advance!

Its far from the worst I've read. I think honestly you need something with some action....excitement. i know that's what i say to everyone but it is truth. if it isn't too fast paced or funny people will lose interest. don't be discouraged by my words. I am just being honest with you. well written and I think with the right ideas in your rp you could be unstoppable here.