Jason E Smith
Welcome the Darkness
XWF FanBase: Tweener/Neutral (crowd reaction varies; dips between face & heel)
(Where is my roster page?)
Joined: Wed Apr 10 2013
Posts: 75
27,804
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3
X-Bux: ✘50,000
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09-15-2013, 03:52 PM
The Vow
Feedback would be appreciated
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Tony Santos
Santos Glares at You
XWF FanBase: (.Awaiting user update)
(Where is my roster page?)
Joined: Sun May 05 2013
Posts: 558
282,482
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Hates Received: 12 in 12 posts
Hates Given: 9
Hates Received: 12 in 12 posts
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59
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09-15-2013, 03:56 PM
Dude, I love what you brought to the table on that promo. You set the scene, and you really let your character be himself. I loved it, to be honest. My only bit of criticism? If you're going to have a change in dialogue (which obviously includes a change in colors, separating the characters), break them out. Don't put one character's comment within another's. It just makes things a bit convoluted and annoying for the reader.
But fuck, man, good work. Keep it up.
September 2013 and May 2019 Star of the Month
1x Hart Champion
1x Television Champion
1x Xtreme Champion
![[Image: VIh61T5.jpg]](http://i.imgur.com/VIh61T5.jpg)
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The following 1 user Likes Tony Santos's post:1 user Likes Tony Santos's post
Jason E Smith (09-15-2013)
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John Msdison 2.Faggot
Guest
XWF FanBase: (.Awaiting user update)
(Where is my roster page?)
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09-15-2013, 05:03 PM
Stay positive, Jason. You've come a long way since when you first came in. Seriously, go back and look at the stuff you were putting out when you first came in. It's a pretty noticeable difference.
Haven't had a chance to read your work yet this week, but I'll try to PM you.
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The following 1 user Likes John Msdison 2.Faggot's post:1 user Likes John Msdison 2.Faggot's post
Jason E Smith (09-16-2013)
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John Austin
Grizzled Young Vet
WWW
XWF FanBase: Some of everyone (cheered; very rarely plays dirty; many likable qualities)
XWF Roster Page
Joined: Mon May 13 2013
Posts: 502
170,406
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Hates Received: 8 in 8 posts
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09-16-2013, 12:29 AM
Like Madison said, you came a long way since at least when I started. You really have stepped up on your work and it shows greatly
Also, the only real gripe I have is basically what Tony pointed out, try and space some stuff out next time, so this way it's not hard on the eyes when to read...at least for me.
Keep up the good work
To find John, turn those lights out because he will then appear...
XWF LEGEND and the only man who punked out Duke TWICE
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The following 1 user Likes John Austin's post:1 user Likes John Austin's post
Jason E Smith (09-16-2013)
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Great Buzzard Eli James IV
Speaker of Truth
XWF FanBase: (.Awaiting user update)
XWF Roster Page
Joined: Tue Jun 04 2013
Posts: 615
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09-16-2013, 09:27 AM
I think you're getting much better. Glad to see you growing and getting better. Keep it up.
1x Universal Champion
1x Undefeated Trio Champion (1/3)
1x Undefeated Tag Team Champion
1x Undefeated European Champion
2x Undefeated UFO/FTW (Ark of the Covenant) Champion
1x United States Champion
2013 July Star of the Month
The One Who Ended  & The Administrator
Former Owner of the XWF
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The following 1 user Likes Great Buzzard Eli James IV's post:1 user Likes Great Buzzard Eli James IV's post
Jason E Smith (09-16-2013)
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