A man sat alone, watching a veritable cavalcade of all manner of rubbish on YouTube. There were videos about the history of Europei, a retrospective of Relentless 2018, new uses for sawdust, and grown adults playing Sonic the Hedgehog. These were the best of times.

However, after a singular video made itself visible, one wherein the history of cheese was discussed, this man felt a small pocket open within his torso, and the desire, nay, need to have a snack befell him.

The man stood, and with curiosity in his heart, walked from his bedroom to the kitchen of his modest garden apartment. He opens his refrigerator and peers into the cold array of consumables. Olives were not going to hit the spot tonight, nor would a sensible pickle. He reaches towards the bottom of the fridge and retrieves a package of ham, pulling a squeezable bottle of mustard from a shelf on the door. He places both on a counter, and pulls out a loaf of bread.

A ham sandwich is prepared.

The man plates his snack and walks it toward a glass door. He slides the door open and steps out onto his patio. However, he trips, and faltering, hurls the sandwich over the railing catching himself.

Below, avid lover of sleeping in bushes Darren Dangerous is catching 40 winks in a shrubbery. The ham sandwich lands atop him.

A referee is there!

1..

2..

Darren was dreaming about beating someone to death with a car door when he smells the unmistakable scent of a ham sandwich.

His eyes pop open and he sees a referee's hand flying towards the ground... so Darren grabs it!

Darren kicks out from under the sandwich and chokeslams the referee. He hits a running senton on the ref and then tanks off a piece of decorative fencing that's around the XWF botanical gardens he was napping in.

He beats the bejezus out of the ref and then points at the sky, bleeding and laughing.

"Huehuehuehue... take that ass kicking courtesy of the DOOE SHOW."

Darren then eats the sandwich and leaves.