WEDNESDAY 28TH OCTOBER 2020
THE XWF CONTINUES IT'S WESTERN EUROPEAN TOUR
THIS IS...
WEDNESDAY NIGHT WARFARE!!!!
From !!!
BARCLAYCARD ARENA, HAMBURG, GERMANY
The chair makes a harsh dragging sound on the floor as it’s pulled back, and the camera pans up to disclose that Notorious Ned Kaye is the next in line to be interviewed concerning Madison Dyson’s untimely demise.
Special Agent Blackman sighs and leans back in his chair, nursing a warmed over cup of coffee.
So I’m gathering that Madison Dyson wasn’t a popular woman. He says with a touch of grim sarcasm.
You could say that again. I mean, you are talking about a woman who said every slur you could think of, and I'm fairly positive she invented a few, too. She made more enemies than she made steps in a day.
Well Mr. Notorious Ned Kaye, her popularity aside, I still have a job to do. Now, you seem like a pretty stand up guy. A good guy. So I’m gonna say right off the bat that I don’t like you for this crime. That being said, even good guys can be pushed to the brink. He meets Ned’s quizzical look. Earlier this year, you lost a big money match to Madison’s client The Engineer. This after you honorably turned in your 24/7 briefcase to face him in a prearranged bout, unlike what most folks do which is some kind of bitch made ambush. Now to me, that takes a lot of gumption.
Well, thank you. I put a lot of thought into it, but I just wouldn't feel comfortable with winning my first title by way of surprise.
But I could also see how losing that match could fuel a lotta rage too. You set yourself up on high, and fell hard. And with The Engineer gone missing, there’s really only one person left to take that anger out on, isn’t there….? He trails off in an accusatory fashion.
Ned leans forward, gesturing with his hands as he speaks. Even if I did place any blame on her for that loss, which I don't, I still wouldn't kill her. I'm not going to defend Dyson one bit; she was an awful person, in fact. And I would be lying if I said I believed that people like Madison Dyson, who thrive off the misery of others to the point of reliance, had any place in this business! But Chris Chaos, a man who dumped my father's ashes on me live on pay-per-view is still breathing, so I don't think there is any precedent to imply I had any involvement with her death.
Blackman looks at Ned contemplaitively before continuing. Very well then, Notorious Ned Kaye. But let me ask you this. If you were a betting man, which member of the XWF roster would you let it ride on as being the killer, and why?
You want my honest opinion? The answer is right in front of you. Who in the XWF has a history of killing? Who is absent from all of this intrigue? And who has the motive? The Engineer. You might not know much about that monster, but I do. He learned from the most despicable, violent people who have ever been in this company: Dyson and . If he wanted her dead, he’d do it in an instant. That kind of sentimentality does not exist within him. And if he has come back, you’d better find him quickly because the amount of chaos and pain that will follow isn’t the kind people recover from. Easily or ever.”
An interesting notion. Except word has it that Corey Smith is free and clear of The Engineer persona. Not like I can fully wrap my head around all that shit.
You and me both. Still, I’d be unsure of the validity of all that. I don’t know. Maybe, in some odd way, I don’t want him to be gone. I’m not sure how else to describe it. ...Anyway, I’d still be wary of Corey.
The agent looks contemplative. I think I will… He trails off a bit. My interview with Mr. Smith is still forthcoming. But thank you for your time.
We fade inside the arena....
The crowd erupts with a thunderous ovation upon hearing the opening riffs of Highly Suspect.
" THADDEUS DUKE IS BACK!"
Attention draws towards the top of the ramp when suddenly the cheers divert to massive boos as we see....
" CHRIS PAGE is on Warfare!"
One Half of the XWF Tag Team Champions soaks in the boos from the crowd as he displays a "THAD" t-shirt upon making a walk towards the ring.
" Chris Page obviously mocking the fact Thaddeus has been on the shelf since Relentless; a large thanks to CCP."
Chris reaches ringside as he barely pays attention to the fans. He instead climbs up on the ring apron before stepping through the ropes and into the ring. Chris walks across the squared circle where he calls for the live microphone.
" We're about to hear from Page."
Chris stands center ring with the microphone in hand as the entrance theme fades leaving nothing but boos from the crowd that garners a smirk from Page as he raises the microphone to his lips.
" What? Expecting someone else?"
Chris pulls the microphone away from his mouth as he laughs at the obvious jab towards Thaddeus. Chris raises the microphone once again as he states.
" Thaddeus isn't here tonight because he picked a fight with a Beast and ended up kissing the wrong man and paid the price for it. What's funny about Thaddeus is for as big a game as he talks he's NEVER pinned me, he's NEVER made me submit, and the ONLY REASON he picked up a DQ win at Relentless was because he realized real quick that he COULDN'T beat me!"[green]
There's a very brief pause from Chris before he continues.
[green]" Rest assured that we're not done Thad, a matter of fact it appears you're entering the High Stakes Battle Royale... let's just say that I'll be eagerly awaiting your arrival because I can't think of a better way to exercise a little bit of revenge than by snatching the Universal Title from your grasp."
Suddenly the crowd ERUPTS! Chris lowers the microphone as he turns his attention towards the top of the ramp as BARNEY GREEN emerges out to the top of the ramp! Barney starts to walk with a purpose towards the ring!
" Big Barney is in the house!"
Barney reaches ringside where he makes his way up the steel steps picking up a secondary microphone in the process as he reaches the ring apron and steps through the ropes. The music fades away leaving a massive "BARNEY! BARNEY! BARNEY!" chant from the crowd. Chris raises the microphone as he states.
" What the hell do you want?"
" First of all what you did to Thaddeus at Relentless was nothing short of disgusting! Second thing is that Thaddeus isn't the only person in the High Stakes Battle Royale.... I am in too! I'm not going to going to listen to you slam a guy that isn't here to defend himself!"
" Well look who woke up and put his big boy panties on today!"
Suddenly without hesitation, Barney drops Page with a right hand to a thunderous ovation from the sold-out crowd! Page rolls out to the floor clutching at his jaw as Barney Green begs for the fight. Chris backtracks up the ramp followed by Barney as we're set for out opening contest.
Purple and Pink fireworks pop off as Ash walks out onto the stage. She skips down to the ring smiling, jumps up on the ring apron sliding under the ropes. Mounting the turnbuckle she waves to everyone with a bright smile.
Nothing special just a slow, focused walk to the ring.
MATCH #1:
MARF
- vs -
ASH QUINN
Standard Match
As the bell rings, we see Ash skipping her lou around the ring against Marf, who stood there with a violent glare at her. Then she reaches her hand out for a handshake, but Marf swiped her hand away from him, then she backs away from him. Then the boos start piling on Marf, who then turns to mean glare at the audiences, then she manages to Back Rake Marf a few times until he turned around. He then tries to punch her, but she dodged and she punches on his gut. Then she kept on punching him in the gut, and she manages to Irish Whip him, but due to his size she ended up eating a lariat from him.
“Man, she’s getting demolished by Marf!”
“I don’t know how she’ll manage against this be moth of a man."
He then picks her up by the hair, and punches her in the gut. As she kneels in pain, Marf then grabs her by her hair and Biel Throws her to the middle of the ring. As Ash is slowing getting on her feet by the ropes, Marf then starts kicking her in the rib cage. Then he places her head on the middle rope, and he kneels his shin on her head, while holding the upper rope.
“Marf is tossing her like a salad…i mean a rag doll!”
“What did you just say?…”
“Oh never mind, lets just focus on the match!”
The ref then counted to four, and he breaks it off. As Ash is holding her throat gasping for air, Marf then stares at the downed Ash and laughs at her pain, as the boo’s kept coming. Then he lifts her up, and shoves her to the corner. He then knee’s her in the gut, Kevin Nash style, and whips her to the other corner. He then charges at her, but she moved out the way from his boot. Then Ash manages to kick his leg out of his leg, and he stumbles off from the corner. She kept kicking him by the legs, until he took a knee.
Then she stomps the mat as the fans gotten alive by her stomps, and she charges into the ropes and she manages to connect with a Shining Wizard on Marf and covers him..
1
MARF TOSSES HER OFF HIM!
Ash is on her knees, and she smacks her hands on the mat. Marf quickly gets on his feet, and he eat the top of the corner post as she gives him a Drop Toe Hold onto it. As Marf held his chin, she then hits him with a Dropkick on to him. She kept on hitting him with multitudes of Dropkicks until he rolled to the outside. As Marf was getting heated at the outside, Ash then taunts for Marf to come back into the ring. Marf comes back on the apron, and she rams her shoulder on his gut. She then tries to suplex him into the ring, but to no avail; then he headbutts her as she falls on the mat.
Marf re enters the ring and he locks in a Side Headlock on Ash. As he locked it on, Ash is slowly fading away. Then the ref does the arm drop gimmick, until the fourth arm drop where she raised a fist up to signal the audience who then in turn chanted her name. Ash slowly gets on her feet, while Marf loosens up the headlock in shock; then she elbowed him in his gut and she Whips him on the ropes and she connects with a Japanese Armdrag out of nowhere on him.
“Man, this Ash Quinn is doing her damnest to prove she can handle this warrior of the night in Germany!”
“She sure is, Pip… we know that she’ll be able to get herself on track to defeat her Goliath.”
Marf quickly get on his feet, and Ash takes her time to dish out those kicks on Marf. Then she manages to hit a combo of kicks that lead into a roundhouse kick, but Marf catches her leg. Ash then pleas for him not to break it, and he transitions it into a Capture Suplex. Marf then circles around Ash, and he deadlifts her into a Belly To Belly Overhead Suplex. He then taunts to the audience “she’s finished!”, as some of the fans on the front row started to throw garbage at him in the ring.
Marf then lifts up Ash, and he hits…
TO THE DARK ROOM!
Then he bridges her with a pin…
1..
2..
TH—NO
Ash manages to kick out of the Dark Room, which caused Marf to push the ref over the count. As Marf was still arguing, Ash slowly gets on her feet and she grabs a “foreign object” and once Marf turns around, she hits him with it which caused him to get to the corner post. As he slouched himself down, she drops the object and she skips to her lou once again and charges to hit him with a Bronco Buster!
“Whoa, this is way way WAY to inappropriate for our network, with how she’s moving up and down on Marf…”
“Is there a punchline to the joke…oh, wait there isn’t one…right?”
“…Anyways…”
As she finishes the buster, she then drag the “lifeless” Marf to the middle of the ring. She then climbs to the top turnbuckle, and does her little shimmy and she connects with the Frog Splash, while slowly hooking up his leg as the ref counted…
1..
2..
MARF KICKSOUT!
“Ash almost got that victory, but she kept herself busy with her shimmy which costed her big time.”
Marf the gets on his feet, and stomps on the mat. He then dishes out some forearm smash over her head, then he hits a Mongolian Chop on Ash. Then he hits a Powerslam on her, and he lifts her up again and dishes out another Powerslam on her. He then grabs her by the hair, and grabs her cheeks and smacks her on the face.
Then Marf then locks in a modified Crossface Chicken Wing on Ash, but she manages to put her foot on the bottom rope. But he locked it in tightly, and the ref counted up to four. He then confronts the ref again, but this time Ash manages play dead in the middle of the ring. Marf then see’s her laid out, but she ended up doing a sneaky small package onto him..
“Oh that conniving Ash, will she be able to secure her victory against Marf with this “small” but HUGE package…she managed to capture him with?”
1…
2…
Marf escapes the near fall as both he and Ash are back to a vertical base with Ash swinging wildly that Marf ducks under, Ash spins around catching a boot to the midsection followed by THE SWAY! Marf makes the cover.
1!!!!
2!!!!!!
THREE!!!
DING... DING.. DING...
WINNER VIA PINFALL MARF SWAYSONS
Marf has his arm raised in victory. Back in the interview room, we see Agent Blackman has two interviewees this time. Miss Fury and Michael Graves. Blackman pulls some files out of his attache and launches into his spiel.
As I’m sure you know, we are looking into the death of Madison Dyson. Gathering information and leads from her coworkers, and….
Blackman, once his eyes settle on the pair, focuses on Graves. Wait a minute, you’re that sick kiddy diddlin’ mothafuckah!!
Graves throws his hands up in protest.
Alleged! Truth is I just K…
Miss Fury nudges Graves to STFU.
What he meant to say was that, that was just a storyline for the wrestling shows. She says while scolding Graves with her eyes.
Well then its a sick ass storyline. The agent sneers before continuing. So I’m told ya’all are part of something called B.O.B., some kind of group of villains. Like a goddamn comic book. So I figured I should look in on the XWF’s resident bad guys when we’re talking murder. You two got anything to say about this investigation?
Never liked the cu..
Fury nudges Graves again, frustration steaming from her eyes.
Nevermind him, he’s a li..
You’ll get your turn! I want to hear what the man has to say!
Fury sulks into her seat as Graves smiles, happy to be heard.
As I was saying, never liked that cunt! I’m actually glad she’s dead! Can you believe that this one was trying to recruit her into BOB!?
Agent Blackman turns his inquisitive stare onto Miss Fury.
That true?
Well yes, actually. Madison Dyson was a huge get for us.
Agent Blackman flips through his various notes.
I’m not seeing anything here about Madison being a member of BOB before her passing..
Cause the cunt said no![dwg]
Agent Blackman looks to Fury for confirmation.
Said no huh?
Miss Fury sits up straight, trying to not look so suspicious.
Not exactly, she said maybe!
Hmm, everyone knows that maybe is just another word for no. How’d that rejection make you feel?
[dwg]Whoa, this is turning into one of my therapy sessions!
Graves is ignored as Fury answers.
She didn’t reject us, she was just waiting for the right time to make her move.
Agent Blackman doesn’t seem to blink as he stares deep into Miss Fury’s soul.
MmmHmmm… And that would be great, if I could confirm your story with the deceased, but that’s not really possible is it?
Miss Fury’s eyes light up as she suddenly gets an idea!
Actually!
Fury looks over to Graves who is picking his nose because he thought nobody was looking. After a moment, he realizes that all eyes are on him. A little embarrassed, Graves flicks the booger across the room trying to play it off like he doesn’t give a shit.
What were you saying?
Fury lets out a disgruntled sigh. Really, nobody likes working with Graves…
The agent needs to speak to Madison Dyson.
Graves doesn’t quite get it and stares back blankly.
Okaaaay…
Listen, I don’t know what the two of you are trying to pull, but Ms. Dyson is dead, so unless you can resurrect her into a wrestling zombie or something, I don’t see how you’re going to be able to help me talk to her.
Still staring at Graves who is still just as lost as he was before, Fury simply says the following.
The potato!
FINALLY getting it, Graves jumps to attention.
OH, RIGHT!
Suddenly Graves vanishes into a thick green mist. It sorta burns the eyes. A combination of the parlor trick and the eye irritating mist, Agent Blackman, startled, yells out.
AH, WHAT THE FUCK!?
Fury, much more calm, just responds with a whispered,
Wait for it…
Suddenly Graves reappears out of the same green mist, but this time he has Madison Dyson with him! Though, she looks to be in immense pain. In fact, she screams her lungs out as a bullet hole leaks blood from her forehead.
Agent Blackman is just in total shock at what he sees before him!
Better make it quick, she’s only got about a minute before she burns up!
Uh… Madison? Did either of these two have anything to do with your murder? WHO KILLED YOU?!
All Madison can accomplish is more anguished screaming.
Times up!
No, Wait!
But it was too late, Graves and Madison already vanished into the mist.
God Damnit! Get her back here, she can break this whole case!
Sorry, that’s a one time deal. If he were to keep her here any longer, her soul would burn up and cease to exist.
Agent Blackman looks to Fury with disbelief.
Wait, you’ve done this before!?
Miss Fury just shrugs.
What can I say, I really wanted to meet Elvis.
Suddenly Graves reappears in the room and as he does, Fury stands up to leave.
I think we’re done here, yeah?
Agent Blackman sulks into his seat, cursing how bizarrely close he was to closing this case.
Yeah, we’re done here…
We return to the arena....
The crowd responds mixed as the name DERRICK DIAMOND flashes on the Jumo-Tron as the newly acquired Co-General Manager of Wednesday Night Warfare emerges out to the top of the ramp. After shooting double thumbs up Derrick; dressed in grungy jeans and a red t-shirt as he sports a mustard stain just above the right pec, begins to walk towards the Warfare ring.
” I don’t really know what to expect from this guy as he’s a virtual unknown walking into a position of authority on the flagship program of the XWF… Pip, do you know anything about this guy.”
” Clearly hitting his mouth with his food has room for improvement.”
We see Derrick reach the ringside area where he climbs up on the ring apron before stepping through the middle ropes only to trip on the rope it self falling into the ring!
” OMG!”
Derrick quickly gets to his feet laughing at himself knowing millions of people watching around the world are doing the same thing. He waves to the camera before getting a microphone. The music fades away as Derrick starts to state.
DERRICK DIAMOND- “H..h….hi everyone, I’m Derrick Diamond and I want to first say… Whaddup FRANCE?!”[blue]
Immediately the German crowd starts to boo as Derrick stops and puts his left hand on his forehead before drawing it back as he corrects his self.
[blue]” DERRICK DIAMOND-“ Germany, I meant Germany… my bad…. France didn’t kill the Jews; they gave us excellent Chocolate and Coffee… FOOD! You can’t forget the food that puts this crap here to shame.”
The boos grow even louder as Derrick can’t understand why.
DERRICK DIAMOND- “ You know what Germany does have? Beer.”
Finally, a pop from the crowd as Derrick smiles as he scratches his scruffy beard before he continues.
DERRICK DIAMOND- “A lot of you might be asking yourselves “Who is Derrick Diamond?” “Who is this guy walking off the streets? An unknown.”… The answers to those questions are very simple. I’m a man with no alliances or allegiances to anyone in the locker room, I’m a man that answers to me, me and me. I’m sure there’s going to several who try me, I’m sure there’s several that might think they can intimidate me… two words… Not happening.”
The crowd quiets down.
DERRICK DIAMOND- ” So there ya have it… that’s me, now it’s time for the Warfare Roster to show me who they are.”
Derrick drops the microphone in the ring as he opts to walk towards the ropes and carefully roll out to the floor under the bottom rope. He waves as he walks up the ramp and disappears behind the curtain.
" The following Triple Threat Contest is a Falls Count Anywhere Match!"
" Introducing first, about to make his way to the ring... PETER GILMOUR!"
The lights in the arena dim, then go to full black. We then see fire emiting from the ramp after a bell tolls a few times. We then hear "SUCK MY DICK" blast from the PA and the crows begins to go ape shit. "FUCK EVERYBODY" by Steel Panther begins to kick in as res strobe lights and lasers hit the stage. We see Peter Gilmour and his demon assassin Valerie Sky appear on the stage. They look around as Peter bobs his head to the music. As soon as the chorus kicks in we see Peter start singing into the camera saying, "EVERYBODY CAN SUCK MY DICK!" They head to the ring and then get in normally. Peter then throws his hands up in an "X" pose as fire and fireworks go off above the ring in the same manner. Peter looks at Valerie and smiles wickedly as they look at the stage waiting for their next victim.
" Intorducing participant number two... GREGGO!"
Greggo's client's theme plays over the speakers as Greggo makes his way through the crowd, occasionally stopping to make out with or grope various people in the audience; both male and female. He is wearing one of the cheap free face masks they give out at stores, so he's definitely being safe about this. The fans seem mostly disgusted by his attempts to molest them, but for all we know that could be due to Corona concerns. (spoiler they've always hated when he does this)
" And finally introducing HOLY ROMAN WAR HORSE!!"
War Horse makes his way down to the ring as we're now set for action.
MATCH #2:
PETER GILMOUR
- vs -
GREGGO
- vs -
HOLY ROMAN WAR HORSE
Falls Count Anywhere
*DING, DING*
The trio of combatants begin by keeping their distance as they circle around the ring. Each of them teases a lock up attempt until Greggo squats down and begins hastily pursuing his opponents by their... "waists."
PC: "Greggo coming in smart with his signature Taint Tickler manuever! His words, not mine!"
HHL: "Pip, I've heard Greggo say some awful things in my time here, but I am 99% you just came up with that and don't want the much deserved shame that comes with coining it."
PC: "The world may never know, Heather."
In a swift moment, Greggo slips out of the ring and starts digging around underneath the ring for equipment! Gilmour takes the opportunity to lock up with Holy Roman War Horse as the ring downsizes! The two men struggle, but Peter finally gets an arm around his Roman adversary's neck! Gilmour begins to lift up, War Horse leaving the ground for a second before planting some punches into Peter's stomach to break free. War Horse slips behind Peter and gives him a belly-to-back suplex! But Gilly is back on his feet quick, dropping himself into the ropes and clotheslining War Horse hard, knocking him to the center of the ring. War Horse rushes at Peter, Gilly counters him with a crushing powerslam!
With a smile, Peter backs into the ropes, waiting for his opponent to get up so he can deliver more hard strikes, but Greggo jumps up behind him and slams a patented Greggo's Frozen Creme Pie™ into Gilly's face, blinding him instantly! Gilmour stumbles forward, eating a running drop kick from War Horse that nearly flips him as he tumbles to the mat! War Horse goes for a roll up on Gilly!
1!
2- KICKOUT!
As War Horse comes to his feet, Greggo rushes into him and tries to hit a Canadian Destroyer, only to flub it and land on his head! Greggo lies there dazed as War Horse prepares to climb the nearest turnbuckle, only to get hit by a superkick from the now standing Peter Gilmour that knocks one of his feet off the top rope and sends him tumbling to the outside, landing on the pad covering the concrete with his back!
Peter turns his attention back to Greggo, wiping the remnants of the frozen pie off his brow, only to see Greggo cowardly retreat out of the ring and into the booing crowd! Peter persues him, rushing into the stands as Greggo ducks and weaves through the crowd, throwing drinks and phones he can grab at Gilly to no avail! Gimour finally catches up, grasping a hand around Greggo's neck that gives the camera a clear shot of Greggo's O-face. Before Peter hits a move, Greggo smacks him in the face with a purse he ripped out of the hands of an audience member! After breaking Peter's grip, he digs through the purse, pocketing some of the money and blasting mace squarely into Peter's eyes! Peter tries to grab Greggo, but his vision being impared again is all Greggo needs to start turning the tide!
Meanwhile, War Horse has recovered in the ringside area and has begun to expose the concrete and procure a kendo stick from beneath the ring! Greggo continues to throw stolen goods at Gilmour, pushing him back towards the ring, even grabbing an audience member's prosthetic leg and beating on Peter with it! War Horse leaps from the crowd barrier and hits the two with a diving double axe handle! Unfortunately for War Horse, Gilmour gets a hold of him! Running off of pure instinct due to visual impairment, Peter lifts War Horse up and hits him with a brainbuster! Horse's back slams against the barrier, causing him to cry out in pain as he tumbles back into the uncovered ringside area!
Still trying to gain back his sight, Peter screams at his opponent!
Peter: "Suck my dick, Greggo!!!"
Greggo: "Don't mind if I do!"
Greggo leaps forward, gnawing onto Gilly's crotch, pinning him in-between his own teeth and the barrier! To the surprise of Greggo, War Horse leaps up and swings the kendo stick against the back of Greggo's head, splitting it in two, breaking Greggo's hold, and knocking Gilly over onto the concrete ringside area!
War Horse has the recovering Gilly in place for his finisher, but Greggo leaps out of the audience behind him, holding the prosthetic leg, winding it up, and slamming it against War Horse's groin! The Roman Steed crumbles only for Greggo to hit him with his questionable finishing manuever! Greggo begins wildly dry humping his downed opponent as he pins his shoulders to the exposed concrete!
1!
2!
...
GILLY BREAKS THE PIN WITH A LEG DROP FROM THE CROWD BARRIER ONTO GREGGO AND WAR HORSE!
Peter picks up Greggo by his neck and sling him into the nearby ring steps, making the professional pervert prone in an instant!
He quickly begins the pin on Holy Roman War Horse, hooking both legs!
1!
2!
...
3!
WINNER BY PINFALL
PETER GILMOUR
Agent Blackman watches as the next subject of his interrogations enters the room. We hear the person shuffling to the table, and hear the chair being drawn back, followed by the satisifed sigh of the person who sat in it. Blackman’s lip twitches, he removes his sunglasses revealing more malice.
The shot cuts over to Robbie Bourbon, who is inexplicably wearing a bowler hat.
A tense few moments pass between them. Finally, Robbie cuts through it.
What?
Would you take that stupid hat off?
Robbie removes the hat, revealing a much smaller, tiny bowler underneath, like the hat he was wearing had a child.
Can I wear your sunglasses?
No, you may not, now remove the other hat!
Robbie takes the tiny hat off and plops it into the other. He pulls out a bag of cheese sticks. Agent Blackman goes from looking like he was going to shit to shitting.
No snacks! Put those away!
Robbie looks displeased. He puts the bowler back on as he tucks the cheese away.
Take that hat off!
Robbie shrugs and sets the cheese on the table as he removes the hat.
I said no snacks!
Robbie stands up. Agent Blackman looks up at Robbie.
Look, you need to relax, I'm trying a new thing with the hat and I like cheese.
Sit down!
Where?
Agent Blackman rolls his eyes and sits in the chair in the room. Robbie puts the tiny bowler hat on him. He holds out a cheese stick centimeters an inch from Agent Blackman's face.
Cheese stick?
Agent Blackman bats the cheesestick to the floor and crumples up the tiny bowler.
Sit.
Down.
Now.
Robbie sits.
You owe me for that hat, tiny hats aren't cheap. Well, they are, but you gotta buy in bulk.
Robbie whistles and Barney Green in a B.O.B. shirt runs in, wearing a tiny bowler, and hands Robbie another tiny bowler.
God dammit, now who are you?!
Barney just shrugs and bolts out the door. Robbie places the tiny bowler on his head.
Now you listen to me, motherfucker….
I was!
Was what?
A Motherfucker!
Blackman, already looking exhausted, waves the notion away. Look, we are here to talk about the death of Madison Dyson, and I want to know if you have any pertinent information that can help with this case!
Robbie replaces the tiny bowler with the regular bowler and eats a cheese stick.
GOD DAMNIT!
What?
Blackman rubs his temples. He places his pointer finger on the table.
Answer the question.
You haven’t asked one!
Don’t give me that shit!
Blackman stops for a minute and realizes, he hasn’t, in fact, asked a question about Madison Dyson at all. Robbie keeps eye contact with Blackman and takes a slow bite out of his cheese stick.
Do you know anything about the death?
Yeah, it supposedly happened during Relentless.
And what was your relationship with the deceased?
We were stablemates, went way back. We were in the Motherfuckers together, she was managing the Engineer at the time. Not the one I fought for the Universal Championship, mind you, this was Engineer one, not two. Two was a prick. Also really fucking weird and had a bit of a goop fetish thing going on with him. Engineer one was a sweet, kind soul that turned super evil, I think because of the same goop fetish. We jumped James Raven together, it was swell.
Thing is, my later dealings with her were a lot less friendly. She was tied in with Shane, and Engineer two, and was a staunch Trump supporter, until she killed him to become the alpha white supremacy denier in the country. Didn’t support her credo then, definitely didn’t like her friends all that much. Shane was a creepy guy. Have you talked to him about all of this yet? All of this just reeks of him.
Last I heard, she turned into a proud black woman, which, hey, good for her.
I can’t...I just can’t anymore. He drags his hand down his face in exasperation. Who do you think killed her? Just shoot a name at me.
Robbie shrugs.
The Engineer.
” The following contest is a SHIFTING RULES match! The match will begin as a Standard Match and every three minutes the stipulation will change, the match will continue until one man scores a pinfall or forces one into submission.”
”Introducing first… about to make his way to the ring he is “NOCTORIOUS” NED KAYE!!”
The entire stadium goes black as the song begins. Slowly, the X-Tron begins to show scarce, glowing embers, the light of each one illuminating smoke growing at the entrance of the ramp. As the song continues, more embers are seen until a large fire is displayed on the screen. The ramp then glows Ned's famous blue, revealing a silhouette in the smoke. Slowly stepping from the fog is none other then Notorious Ned Kaye. He stops for a moment, calming himself in front of the clamoring crowd. He lifts an arm, eyeing the stands to watch the many audience members who follow suit. With a single smile, he drops his arm
Ned rushes towards the ring sliding under the bottom rope before he’s back to his feet and removing his ring jacket as the music fades away.
” And his opponent…”
The music hits as a video package of Charlie Nickles laying fools out rolls on the X-tron. Charlie pops out through the entrance, absolutely vibing to the music and hyping himself up. He walks down the entrance ramp with his arms held wide out at his side ala the passion of the Christ. He seems absolutely unconcerned with the jeers and taunts of the audience. As he nears the ring he suddenly brings his arms back to the center of his body, shaking his closed fists in the air while screaming something incoherent. He hustles over to the stairs, quickly ascending them before grabbing the top rope and stepping onto the ring apron. Charlie looks back at the audience with a toothy grin before ducking under the top rope and stepping the ring proper.
MATCH #3:
“NOTORIOUS” NED KAYE
- vs -
CHARLIE NICKLES
Shifting Rules Match: Match starts as a Standard Match, stipulations shifts every three minutes at random. All match stipulations in play
DING…. DING…. DING…..
” We’re underway in a very unique style of match up, shifting rules.”
” Arguably the brainchild of Co-GM Derrick Diamond.”
STANDARD MATCH
Ned and Charlie circle each other before looking to lock up, Ned uses his quickness to duck under the attempt and catches Charlie with a stiff kick to the upper right quad before backing away from the larger Nickels.
” You’d think the standard stipulation would be more up Ned’s ally, but Ned has shown over the years he can go with anyone in any match.”
The two look to lock up a second time and again Ned ducks under and as Charlie spins around Ned looks for another kick to the quad only to have Charlie catch the leg and throw it back down to the mat before delivering a forearm to the jaw followed by a second and then a third that backs Ned up against the far side ropes. Charlie looks for an Irish Whip sending Ned across the ring where he bounces off the ropes ducking under a clothesline attempt by Nickels, Ned bounces off the far side once again where he catches Charlie with a spinning heel kick that sends Nickels to the mat with Ned forcing a cover.
1!!!
2!!!
THR…
Charlie escapes the near fall as Ned is back to a vertical base. Charlie starts to get back to his feet where he’s met with a side headlock by Kaye who then snaps him over to the mat with a side headlock takeover as both of Charlie’s shoulders are on the mat.
1!!!
2!!!
THR…
Charlie rolls off the mat and onto his stomach as Ned maintains control of the side headlock.
” Ned is outwrestling Nickels, but one has to wonder if what’s next as we’re a minute and a half away from the stipulation shifting.”
”… And we know how hardcore Charlie can get.”
Nickels starts working his way back to his feet while Ned maintains the side headlock. Charlie counters by delivering a side suplex to break the side headlock. Charlie and Ned both get to their feet where Nickels drives him back into a neutral corner where he starts to unload with rapid-fire forearm smash that eventually knocks Ned down to a seated position in the corner. Nickels turns and walks across the ring to the opposite corner before turning back around and running full speed delivering a running knee to the face of Kaye!!
The lights suddenly flicker followed by the announcement.
FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH
Ned rolls out to the ring apron where he falls to the floor. In the ring Charlie steps out to the ring apron before climbing up on the middle turnbuckle as he looks down at Ned…..
” Charlie Nickels is a crazy bastard!”
Charlie makes the cover.
1!!!
2!!!
THRE…
Ned kicks out of the near fall!
” I thought he had em’!”
Nickels starts hammering forearms to the face of Kaye before he stands back up to a vertical base. Charlie picks Ned up off the floor where he takes him by the head towards the steel ring steps where he drives Ned face first off the ring steps!
” Falls Count Anywhere is right up Charlie’s ally.”
Charlie backs away from Ned before charging forward with a full head of steam! Ned steps forward delivering a hip toss into the steel steps! Nickels bounces off the steps as we see Ned climb up on the ring apron where he sizes Charlie up for a Shooting Star Press off the apron! Ned makes the cover.
1!!!
2!!!!
THRE…
Charlie kicks out of the near fall! Ned gets back to his feet where he reaches down picking up Charlie up off the floor where he drives him back into the security railing. Ned comes forward taking Nickels around the ring and towards the announcers table!
” They’re coming right for us!”
Heather and Pip abandon the announce position as Ned drives Charlie face first into the table before rolling him on top of it! Ned turns and slides back into the ring as he measures Charlie and allows him to start rolling off the table…
The crowd erupts as both men lay within the broken announcers table before Ned manages to roll over getting an arm over the chest of Charlie!
1!!!!
2!!!
THRE…
Charlie kicks out to a huge gasp from the crowd!
Ned slowly starts to negotiate himself back to a vertical base before reaching down and picking Charlie up by the hair as he sends him back into the ring under the bottom rope. Ned rolls back into the ring as the lights dim out and come back up as the stipulation shifts.
I QUIT MATCH
Ned pulls himself to his feet as he walks towards Charlie where he looks to pick him up off the canvass only to be on the receiving end of a low blow by Nickels! Ned falls backwards to the mat as Charlie reaches both knees. We see Charlie step up to a vertical base.
” We’re back on commentary as this all out brawl continues and as they bring us another table!”
Charlie bounces off the ropes delivering a fist drop to the forehead of Ned before demanding the microphone where he crams it down into the face of Kaye as he screams for his to quit! Ned refuses and knocks Nickels off his upper body.
Charlie beats Ned to his feet where he delivers a spinning neck breaker.
Charlie rolls out to the floor where he reaches under the ring pulling out a large black sack. He rolls back into the ring where he reaches his feet with the black bag in hand!
” Thumbtacks!”
Charlie empties the content of the thumbtacks in the ring before shifting his attention back towards Ned who is working his way back to a vertical base, he staggers backwards before turning around where he’s scooped up over the shoulder of Charlie Nickels! Before Charlie can slam Ned into the thumbtacks we see Kaye slide down Charlie’s back and as Charlie spins around he’s met with a V-Trigger to the jaw!
” Notorious Knee! “
Charlie staggers backwards towards the thumbtacks only he doesn’t fall! Ned comes forward with a superkick to the jaw that staggers Charlie but doesn’t send him falling over into the tacks. Ned bounces off the ropes where he’s met with a Spinbuster Slam into the Thumbtacks by Nickels!
“HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”
Both men are down as the lights dim signaling a shift in the stipulation.
LAST MAN STANDING
With both men down the referee starts to lay the count to both men.
1...
2....
3....
4....
5....
6....
7....
8....
Charlie uses the ropes to pull himself up to his feet!
9....
10!!!!
DING... DING... DING....
WINNER: CHARLIE NICKELS
Special Agent Blackman is pacing the room, and the camera focuses on him at first, leaving his latest person of interest just out of view.
First off, I should thank you for showing up. I know your relationship with the XWF ain’t what it used to be. A half smile forms. However, you ARE a major person of interest in this investigation given your recent history with the deceased. You two ginned up a lot of bad blood between yourselves in a relatively short amount of time. And while I know many, many people weren’t fans of Ms. Dyson, the slight she made against you seemed to go unanswered. Until now, perhaps?
The shot finally pans over to reveal Shawn Warstein sitting in the hot seat!
So why exactly am I here? I understand that I wasn’t in her top 8 on MySpace, but really murder? Shawn smiles briefly before continuing. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not sad that she’s fucking dead. Hell I’m pretty sure I got wasted when I heard it happened.
In your own words you would say that… He pauses.This goes beyond social media Shawn. The woman ambushed and humiliated you at a major pay per view event. Right after that, it’s to my understanding, you got cashed in on by Sarah Lacklan and lost your belt. Combine that with your history of, shall we say, volatility and, well…..
Yeah. Also let’s not forget to pile on the rampant drug use, prone to blackouts, and probably some brain damage. Shawn taps his temple while raising an eyebrow. But I’ve been in this business longer than most, and even I know that you can get revenge on the dead. Shawn leans forward onto the table and places his head on his palms. And if you knew anything about me… Shawn looks up with puppy dogs eyes. I would never use a gun. It’s too….sloppy. If it was me…. Trust me. It would be torturous. That bitch would’ve felt every small dagger. They say a death by a thousand cuts. I’d make sure there were a thousand and one.
The agent looks grim.Oh yeah, your ass is DEFINITELY gonna have to leave your deets with my fellow agents outside that door. Rollin’ all up in here with this psycho shit. You makin’ a fine mess of things Mr. Warstein and shootin’ right to the top of my list. He looks at him askance. You were already the person on this roster with the most cause to kill Madison. Unless you know somethin’ I don’t. If you can think of something you might just catch some breathing room. Get my drift?
Why would I help you? Shawn leans off of the table and back in his chair. Smug look across his face. I mean listen to yourself. Asking me if I did it…. and if I didn’t who might have. Fuck man, if you catch the person I might throw them a fucking party, pay for their legal funds, and resurrect Johnny Cochran. Whoever did it…. Shawn kicks his feet up on the table and puts his hands behind his head. Needs to be given a fucking medal. Lucky for you tho, I know I didn’t do it, and clearly you don’t know who did. So I’ll tell you this right now. Shawn smiles widely. I’ve been in Dallas for the past two months, ask James Raven to verify, but as for others? Have you tried the boogeyman? What about Bigfoot? Or have you checked Greggo? The Lachlan family? What about Vinny? Or even Charlie Nickels? Shawn takes his feet off the table and motions to the detective to lean in. In a soft hushed tone Shawn speaks. This last one is huge…. Shawn looks around the room and then back to the hushed tone. I’d like to speak to my lawyer now.
Yeah, yeah, that sounds like a real good idea for you right now. One of the other agents opens the door for Shawn to leave. Don’t go far.
Cameras go backstage as there was a guy, wearing green clothes, although his mask was green and black. The crowd cheer for him which only means one thing, it's non-other known as Lord Raab. Of course, as long as Sarah was out, he's still making German appearances for the show, despite him not wrestling the last few shows. He had made his statement last week on how desperate he was to face Sarah Lacklan. He begins to speak.
Lord Raab: "It's typical of a toxic bitch to run away after I've made a few challenges, Sarah Lacklan if you wanted to know who I'm referring to. All these times she's been attacked from my knowledge, especially in the form of my twin brother Konrad, she never ran away from him, although she provoked the attack for Konrad to do on her when he was someone he hated because Sarah is a fucking cunt who plays with people and I'm going to fuck her up for it, amongst other shit she's done."
The crowd cheer mainly because of Lord Raab's defence of his twin brother Konrad and he continued.
Lord Raab: "Now I'm ready to fight and well part of me was happy that Chris Chaos viciously attacked her. It gave me a massive smile on my face because it's exactly what I've dreamt doing since I found out about Sarah bullying my brother in a way that was so malicious with no regret on anything she said or done. At the same time, pissed off because I wanted to have one simple match with that bitch. None of you understands how badly I want to get my hands on Sarah Lacklan for crossing a damn line."
Raab shook his head, still being uncomfortable of talking backstage because it's not something he's used to doing. At the same time, he wanted everyone to pay attention to his goals.
Lord Raab: "I will still be around because I will not give up my quest of facing and beating the living shit out of Sarah in a hardcore match, not her ass-kissing manager who shouldn't have anything to do with me and Sarah's battles. Not when he claimed I went to terrorise his mother or some shit like that. I don't give a shit about you Greggo, stay the fuck out of my way. I'm here to face Sarah only, not anybody else, including yourself."
Lord Raab crouches on the floor, something he hadn't done before, but there was green paint on the floor he created earlier and says this.
Lord Raab: "This is paint, but it will be the way of removing the most toxic wrestler I've ever seen or heard full of how diseased ridden Sarah Lacklan is. For now, she's out, but I'll be waiting in the shadows and I'll happily wait until she returns so I can look in her eyes and beat the disease toxic wrestler out of her until there's nothing left of Sarah. Trust me, you will never ever see the pathetic waste of space Sarah return to wrestling once I'm finished with her because this is personal and I'll forever be waiting until the opportunity comes around where The Green Disease German Monster will beat and win against Sarah Lacklan where I'll hold nothing back."
Raab dropped the microphone on the floor as he gets up and looks closely at the camera with a mean intent look on his face before walking away for the cameras to go at ringside for the next match to take place on Warfare.
Zane makes his way out from behind the curtain playing to the crowd for a few moments before making the walk to the ring. He slides underneath the bottom rope making his way to his corner where he takes a seat nodding along to his entrance music.
HHL: Well ladies and gentlemen if you are watching at home, Robert Main got to decide the stipulation for this match, and he choose something we haven’t seen in a very long time. The fans got to bring the weapons for tonight’s Xtreme Championship match. And from looking around the crowd there are some wild things out there.
Pip: You can say that again, The XWF has some of the most ravenous fans and tonight they are showing it firsthand. Robert “The Omega” Main has three title defenses down and if he can get through Zane Norrision tonight, he is just one match away from the 24/7 case. And here he comes now The XWF Xtreme Champion Robert Main…
Hallelujah begins blaring throughout the arena as Robert walks through the curtains with the Xtreme Championship on his right shoulder and his half of the XWF Tag Team Championships on his left. He leers over the arena nodding sadistically as a grin forms, he rolls his shoulders adjusting both his championships… He eyeballs Zane for several second before walking down the ramp. He stops at the ring steps not taking his eyes off Zane for a second, he then slams his hands on the ring steps entering the ring.
Pip: What can Zane do here tonight to deliver the upset?
HHL: Well, Zane needs to get on his bike and ride… Robert is 6’6 and damn near 250 pounds… Zane needs to use his speed and not allow Robert to get ahold of him. If Robert gets his hands-on Zane, it’s going to be a long and painful night
MATCH #4:
FOR THE XTREME CHAMPIONSHIP
ZANE NORRISON
- vs -
ROBERT "THE OMEGA" MAIN
Robert Main can name stipulation in first roleplay
Robert leisurely walks out to the center of the ring motioning Zane to come on… Zane pulls himself up by the middle rope meeting Robert in the center of the ring. Zane begins mouthing as Robert places his hands on his hips. Zane pushes Robert in the chest, but Robert doesn’t budge.
HHL: Robert didn’t move…
Pip: Our Champion is like a brick wall.
Robert shakes his head no pushing Zane off his feet to the canvas. Norrison appears shocked at Robert’s strength getting back to his feet as quickly as possible… Zane bounces off the ropes hitting a baseball slide right between Robert’s legs. Zane tries to leg sweep Robert but is meet with a big boot in the face... Robert waste no time pulling Norrison off the canvas delivering a massive knee strike, Zane begins to crumple but Robert doesn’t allow him to fall… Robert hooks Zane’s head delivering an Omega Suplex dead center of the ring. Robert dusts his hands-off climbing to the middle rope…
Pip: Oh no…
HHL: There he goes…
Robert lands right in the middle of Zane’s chest hitting a massive Ice Pick Elbow Drop… Robert again gets back to his feet quickly ignoring the pin… Out of desperation, Zane hits Robert with a low blow bending Robert over… Zane then hits Robert with a massive uppercut staggering Robert back into the ropes.
HHL: Zane has some life…
Pip: He’s back on his feet…
Zane begins striking Robert anywhere he can sending Robert through the middle rope to the ring apron. Robert gets to his feet holding the top rope as Zane bounces off the ropes. Robert sees it coming loading up his right hand. Mid run Zane notices Robert loading up… Robert swings as Zane dropkicks Robert off the ring apron to the floor. Zane takes off bouncing off the ropes diving through the middle rope hitting a suicide dive.
HHL: Robert caught Zane like a football…
Pip: Is Zane biting Robert’s shoulder?
HHL: He said he would!
Zane continues biting Robert’s shoulder and arm several times as Robert bounces Zane off the ring post dropping him to the floor. Robert stomps on Zane several times before looking to the crowd for a weapon.
HHL: Business is about to pick up…
Pip: is that a Robert Main Steak Brander?
HHL: It is… And it’s only available on XWFSHOP.com
Zane gets to his knees where he is whacked over the head several times. Robert pulls Zane off the floor hitting a rotating vertical suplex… Zane bounces off the floor hard… Robert chuckles to himself reaching into the crowd yet again for a strand of barbwire. Robert wraps the barbwire around his fist mounting Zane and begins hammering away… Zane tries covering up the best he can, so Robert takes the barbwire from his fist and wraps it around Zane’s neck choking him…
Pip: look at the sheer violence…
HHL: Robert’s never been afraid to take things to the next level…
Robert releases Zane mocking a few members of the XWF crowd when Robert his pushed into the ring steps… Zane frantically sees an opening and begins digging around underneath the ring pulling out a steel chair… Zane rushes over hitting Robert over the back several times dropping Robert to one knee Zane waits with the steel chair in hand screaming at Main to get up… Robert shakes off the cobwebs as Zane tosses Robert the chair… Robert seems confused…
Pip: Zane just hit Skywalker on Main.
HHL: Robert fell back into the ring steps hard. Zane’s on the ring apron.
Zane takes off full speed leaping into the air for another suicide dive. Robert sees it coming grabbing the steel chair and swinging for the fences connecting with Zane’s head… Zane Falls to the floor and isn’t moving.
HHL: Robert just decapitated Zane Norrison!!!
Pip: Robert senses blood in the water…
Main tosses the chair pulling Zane up off the floor…
HHL: What can Main possibly do next?
Pip: That’s anyone’s guess.
Dead Man’s Hand on the floor…Main picks Zane up off the floor and hurls him back into the ring where he slides in after him making the cover and hooking the near leg.
1!!!!!
2!!!!
THREE!!!
DING... DING... DING...
WINNER AND STILL XWF XTREME CHAMPION- ROBERT "THE OMEGA" MAIN
We shoot backstage to the office of the one and only Theo Pryce. He’s standing above a hunched over figure sitting at a table, Corey Smith. Corey, a document before him, puts pen to paper and signs off on it with a flourish. Then, placing the pen at the side, he simpy looks at the document for a moment.
You’re officially on the XWF roster. Or, BACK on the roster, as the case may be. Feel good?
Damn good. Corey stands up, and a smile is playing on his face. But the lightest hint of darkened circles are forming under his eyes.
Then how come you look exhausted?
The smile falters a bit. Just training hard to get myself back into a shape. And, been in my own head a lot, I guess.
Theo looks skeptical, but doesn’t seem to press the issue too much. Well, if in the course of being in your own head you start to find yourself becoming a nihilistic cult leader again shoot me a heads up, would ya?
It’s a joke of course, but Corey’s smile falters some more in the face of it. Then, rallying, he looks up at Theo.
I’m surprised you didn’t ask for time on the show to do some big come back segment. Most guys would have leapt at the chance.
Honestly, I’m not sure I deserve it. He shrugs. I know I wasn’t exactly myself, but I still made a mess of things the last time I was physically here. I’m not sure people would want to see me. Not yet. Not until I’m sure.
Theo quirks a bit of an eyebrow at the last statement and it’s ambiguity. But he doesn’t have a chance to follow up as Corey is already cutting in. Surprisingly, he’s mustered a smile.
But I wouldn’t mind having some pyro for my entrance.
Well….
Please?
I guess. Theo’s lips press together. Look, you have the chance again to be one of our biggest and most bankable stars. I think these fans are LOOKING for a reason to love you. Don’t fuck it up.
Corey simply nods and turns to head out of the office. But then, when he’s halfway to the door, he points “finger guns” at Theo and slaps on a shit eating grin. But pyro for realisies?!
Theo rolls his eyes out of his skul. Yes! Christ, don’t make me regret it.
Corey chuckles as he heads out the door...and runs straight into FBI Special Agent Blackman! Going instantly deadpan, Corey stops in his tracks. Blackman inches his shades down into the bridge of his nose. Corey Smith, just the young man I was lookin’ for.
Looking guarded, Corey replies. I assume you want to interview me?
Hell yeah I wanna interview you. Nobody else on this roster has been both Madison’s sworn enemy AND her most faithful client. His eyes narrow. Plus, there is the not so small matter of you inheriting her entire estate.
You think I wanted that?
Well you sure as shit got it, didn’t you? Now are you gonna come with me or do I gotta make things difficult?
Corey looks to the side, his features returning to an exhausted state. I’ll go with you.
That’s what I’m talkin’ about. Blackman slides his shades back up and nods his head in a direction down the hall. He starts walking, with a very unenthusiastic looking Corey Smith in tow.
We cut elsewhere as BARNEY GREEN approaches DERRICK DIAMOND backstage.
BARNEY GREEN- " Mr. Diamond?"
DERRICK DIAMOND- " Hey Barney."
BARNEY GREEN- " I'm not going to take a lot of time, but did you happen to catch what happened earlier tonight between Chris Page and myself?"
DERRICK DIAMOND- " Of course I did man, it was good to see someone stand up to him."
BARNEY GREEN- " Would I be asking to much for a match with Page in two weeks?
DERRICK DIAMOND- " Are you sure?"
BARNEY GREEN- " I've never been more sure of anything in my life."
DERRICK DIAMOND- " Consider it done."
We return back to ringside.
”The following contest is your Main Event of the evening, and is a CASKET MATCH for the XWF HART CHAMPIONSHIP!
We get a shot of a normal sized casket, a large size casket and a sumo sized casket on various sides off the ring.
”Introducing the challenger, about to make his way to the ring…. He is THE WIZARD!”
Arena goes dark. Silence. Fans are curious. POOF. Big puff of smoke. The WIZARD is in the ring.
”And introducing his opponent….”
” He is the XWF HART CHAMPION and representing B.o.B…. ROBBIE BOURBON!”
The lights in the arena go deep blue as smoke fills the air. Pink and silver laser lights cut through the smoke and it looks fucking rad.
As Some Kind of Monster blares throughout the arena, slowly walking out onto the entrance ramp is Robbie Bourbon. He stops, surveys the whole of the arena, raises his fists at 45 degree angles, and continues his deliberate plod towards the ring. Robbie climbs the steps, then climbs the nearest ring post half way and raises his fists at 45 degree angles. The lights go back to normal and the music stops. The XWF Universe in attendance, becoming hooligans, all chant in unison:
*FUN!*FUN!*FUN!*FUN!*FUN!*FUN!*FUN!*FUN!*
” There’s nothing fun about this casket match, one of these men will be sealed inside one of these caskets!”
” This is going to get out of control.”
Robbie and Wizard are left in the ring as the referee calls for the bell.
Robbie Bourbon can name stipulation in first roleplay
DING…. DING… DING…..
The two big men walk out to center ring, each trying to intimidate the other but neither is successful as Robbie shoves Wizard back a few feet only to see Wizard come back with a shove of his own pushing the mountain that is Robbie back. Bourbon comes back with a right hand attempt that Wizard blocks and counters with a right hand followed by a second and then a third before backing Bourbon up against the ropes before sending him across the ring, Robbie bounces off the ropes with a shoulder block only to see neither man go down! Robbie motions for Wizard to hit the ropes! Wizard bounces off the ropes looking to deliver a shoulder block only to run into a stiff clothesline from Bourbon that sends Wizard back into the ropes! Bourbon charges forward with a second clothesline that sends Wizard over the top rope and falling down to the floor!
” These are two big boys right here.”
Bourbon rolls out to the floor where he stomps down on Wizard before picking him up off the floor and looks to introduce him face first off the normal sized casket, Wizard puts on the breaks with his hands before turning and driving elbows to the ribs of Bourbon and it’s Wizard that counters by driving Bourbon face first off the casket! Wizard drives Bourbon face first into the casket a second time before he drives Robbie lower back first into the ring apron! Bourbon rolls back into the ring followed by Wizard who is back to his feet. The challenger waits and measures the Champion who starts to push himself up off the mat and back to a vertical base. Wizard comes forward with a big boot to the face that sends Robbie back into a neutral corner. Wizard charges forward with a Avalanche splash squashing Robbie back into the buckles! Robbie staggers out from the corner and into a Side Walk slam from Wizard!
” I’ve been told they’ve reinforced the ring with these two.”
Wizard gets back to his feet where he glances towards the regular sized casket. He reaches down picking Robbie up off the mat only to be gouged in the eyes! Bourbon steps up to his feet where he explodes towards Wizard nearly cutting him in half with a Spear! Robbie rolls towards the ropes where he rolls out to the ring apron and opens the lid to the regular sized casket before rolling back into the ring where he starts to roll Wizard towards the open casket. He rolls him under the ropes when reality sets in that Wizard is too big and the casket won’t! This doesn’t stop the Hart Champion! Robbie rolls Wizard into the casket, various parts of his body overhanging the sides! Robbie backs up on the ring post on the apron before running the apron and delivering Senton off the apron down on to Wizard causing the casket to implode sending both men crashing down to the floor!
”HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”
” Dear God Wizard could have some broken ribs after that!”
Robbie Bourbon uses the apron to pull himself back up to his feet where he hurls the apron back and retrieves a steel chair. We see Wizard roll through the debris of the casket before pushing himself up to all fours and its Bourbon to cracks the chair across the back of the challenger!
” No Disqualifications in a Casket Match…”
Bourbon slides the chair into the ring before turning his attention towards the ring steps. Robbie comes forward picking up the top portion of the steel steps! Wizard starts pulling himself back to his feet and as he does Bourbon comes forward looking to smash the steps into the face of the challenger, Wizard counters with a drop toe hold sending Robbie forward bouncing face first off the steel steps!
Wizard pushes himself up off the floor and back to his feet where he clutches at his lower back before making his way towards the Champion, he reaches down picking him up off the floor where he delivers a headbut across the bridge of the nose of Bourbon sending him backwards into the security railing. Wizard comes forward taking Bourbon by the head before driving it face first into the security railing!!
Wizard takes Robbie and bring him around the ring to the larger casket where he drives Bourbon face first off the lid before rolling him back into the ring. The Wizard slides back into the ring after the Champion where he gets back to his feet before picking Robbie up off the mat. Wizard takes Bourbon back into the ropes before shooting him across the ring. Robbie bounces off the ropes and into a boot to the face that staggers him backwards! Wizard charges towards Bourbon with a clothesline, Bourbon ducks and its Wizard who bounces off the ropes and as Bourbon spins around Wizard takes him down with a cross body block!
” Wizard has a prime opportunity to win the Hart Championship!”
Wizard rolls towards the ropes and out to the ring apron where he opens the lid to the larger casket before rolling back into the ring. He reaches his feet where he picks Bourbon up off the mat. He rocks the Champion with a hard right hand that sends Bourbon back towards the ropes. Wizard charges towards the Champion, Robbie side steps and sends Wizard through the ropes and out to the ring apron Bourbon rocks Wizard with a hard right hand that drops him to the ring apron! Bourbon uses the ropes for leverage as he shoves Wizard into the casket with his boots!
Robbie reaches under the top and middle rope grabbing the lid before attempting to slam it shut on Wizard!
Wizard catches the lid with both hands as the power struggle begins! Bourbon tries to force the lid down but Wizard manages to power it back up and kick Bourbon in the head which sends Robbie spilling forward out to the ring apron! Wizard sits up in the casket before climbing out and on to the ring apron. Bourbon swings but it’s blocked and it’s Wizard who takes Bourbon by the throat! He hoist Robbie up and drives him down THROUGH THE CASKET with a Chokeslam!
The casket implodes with all the weight of the big man!
” HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”
’ Wizard has just Exorcised Robbie and in the process a second casket has been completely destroyed!”
” Bourbon just took one hell of a fall and imploded a second casket!”
Wizard looks down at Bourbon from the ring apron before shifting his attention towards the sumo sized casket/ He steps through the ropes back into the ring and makes his way to the side of the ring with the sumo casket and reaches through the ropes where he opens the lid and is decked in the jaw by….
” Thunder Knuckles!!”
TK pops up out of the casket as Wizard is knocked back into the ring! TK climbs up on the ring apron before entering the ring where he charges at Wizard throwing a right hand, Wizard blocks and counters with a boot to the midsection before taking TK and hurling him into a neutral corner where Wizard charges in after him and looks for a Splash, TK side steps Wizard sending Wizard sternum first into the buckles. Wizard staggers backwards towards the center of the ring where TK jumps up on his back locking in the X-BUX DREAM!
” The Television Champion is trying to put Wizard to sleep!”
Wizard isn’t having it as he grabs the legs of TK before falling directly backwards smashing him into the mat! Robbie Bourbon slides into the ring where he gets to his feet as Wizard is shown getting to a vertical base where he turns around into a Pop-Up Spinebuster Slam!
” Dinosaur Extinctor!”
Bourbon looks towards the Sumo Casket which is still open! He starts to roll Wizard towards the casket! He rolls him under the bottom rope to the ring apron before rolling him into the casket! Bourbon reaches for the door to slam the lid shut and as he starts to slam it Wizard manages to block the lid being slammed shut!
” Wizard has fight left in him!”
Bourbon tries to force the lid shut but Wizard pushes back and forcing the lid back up to the point he is able to gouge Robbie in the eyes which breaks the grip on the lid of the casket and allows Wizard to remove himself from harm’s way and get out of the casket. Wizard climbs back on the ring apron as Bourbon comes forward with a right hand! Robbie swings with a second that’s blocked by Wizard and countered with a headbut that staggers Bourbon backwards! Wizard enters the ring where he catches Bourbon with the Iron Claw to the face!
” SPELLCAST!”
We see TK working his way back to his feet where he charges forward towards Wizard only to get the Iron Claw on his face as well!
” DOUBLE SPELLCAST!”
Wizard cranks on both of the skulls of Bourbon and TK! It’s unbelievable that Wizard drops both TK and Bourbon each to one knee as he cranks on the Spellcast! Suddenly Robbie Bourbon low blows Wizard causing him to release the hold on both TK and Bourbon, TK rolls out to the floor as Wizard drops to one knee! Wizard steps back up to a vertical base where Bourbon lands a jumping uppcut that drops Wizard to one knee again allowing Robbie to drop Wizard with a Double Axe Handle! Bourbon reaches down picking Wizard up off the mat before positioning him for a Powerbomb! Robbie hoists Wizard up in the air before running towards the ropes and delivering a running Bourbon Bomb over the top rope and into the Sumo Sized casket! Wizard lands hard as the lid falls shut!
DING,.....DING.... DING....
WINNER AND STILL HART CHAMPION- BOBBY BOURBON
TK rolls back into the ring with the Hart Title as he presents it to Bobby and raises his arm in victory.
" Is Wizard going to take the involvement of Thunder Knuckles laying down as Bobby Bourbon has successfully defended the Hart Title!"
Robbie and TK shift attention towards the top of the ramp as the Co-General Manager of Warfare Derrick Diamond walks out to the top of the ramp with a microphone in hand. He raises the microphone as the music fades.
DERRICK DIAMOND- " I wish I could say that I didn't see this coming based on what I've seen over the last several weeks before starting tonight on Warfare. BoB has been running rough shot over any and everyone that stands in front of them by exploiting whatever rules they can to shift the balance of power in their favor. Fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me. Ealrier tonight I told everyone I'm the one man with zero loyalties to anyone on the roster which is why in two weeks Robbie or Bobby or whatever you want to call yourself will be defending the Hart Title in a Triple Threat Match against GREGGO and KIERAN OVERTON with BOB members remotely taint the outcome you'not going to have to worry about another title defense."
Derrick tosses the microphone while throwing a double thumbs up to Robbie Bourbon as Wednesday Night Warfare fades to black.
TK was just having a nice nap inside that casket when the Wizard startled him, and given his words about B.O.B., can you blame TK for defending himself.
Sheesh, it's a miracle, too. Imagine if he decided to take a nap in either of the other caskets!
Now you're threatening to strip me of my title?
I think you're overreacting.
OOC: Awesome match, much love to the writer and to Wizard, glad to be a part of all of that with you both.
Well ladies u get a chance to be with me. Sadly for me it'll last just a few seconds.
Have fun with zane though. Ill be in the locker room eating a nice plate of chicken parm😉
SUCK... MY... DICK!
3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion
u might have a nice ass but i still got the biggest dick in all of the XWF..
bring it babes!
SUCK... MY... DICK!
3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion
Greggo is all fucked up backstage, laying naked on the floor, covered in sweat and other fluids. You'd think he was fresh off his match if it weren't days ago.
I did it! I wons my match 1 2 3! Take that Gilly you dick sucker, I earnt a title shot OMFG yes I knew I could do it for my Sarah and keep our legacy going while she's vacant. Get reddy Robby because I'm coming fer yer world title boi. Mmmm, MMMM! Gimme gimme gimmeh... I'ma take ALL'a BoB's semenz hostage.
i bet u sucked vinnie and theo's "massive" cocks to get that title shot right there shane er i mean greggo?
u still lost and will lose to robbie this week so stfu bitch
SUCK... MY... DICK!
3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion
Derrick Diamond
Registered but either hasn't added self to a roster yet or doesn't RP
XWF FanBase: Some of everyone (cheered; very rarely plays dirty but isn't lame either; many likable qualities)
(Where is my roster page?)
Joined: Wed Oct 14 2020
Posts: 51
536,967
Likes Given: 153
Likes Received: 285 in 40 posts
Hates Given: 2
Hates Received: 2 in 2 posts
Hates Given: 2
Hates Received: 2 in 2 posts
Reputation:
14 X-Bux: ✘25,000
(11-01-2020, 12:19 AM)Peter Fn Gilmour Said: i bet u sucked vinnie and theo's "massive" cocks to get that title shot right there shane er i mean greggo?
u still lost and will lose to robbie this week so stfu bitch
” Considering neither Theo nor Vinnie booked this show and I did I can assure you there was no dick sucking involved, sadly.”
3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion
(10-28-2020, 06:27 PM)Ash Quinn Said: Lost again!! Jeebus Christmas!! All that aside great show guys I didn’t even quit reading after my match
If booking does their job, you'll have me on your team next week. I expect perfection, and nothing less.
All hail the Queen.
Shut.
The fuck.
Up.
83-31-1
1x XWF Universal Champion || 3x XWF Xtreme Champion || 1x XWF Supercontinental Champion (First)
1x XWF Hart Champion (Last) || 2x XWF Television Champion || 1x XWF Tag Team Champion
1x OCW Savage Champion || 1x IIW Tag Team Champion || 1x AAW United States Champion
2x SOTM (9/20, 7/21) || 2021 Male Wrestler of the Year || XWF Hall of Legends