XWF FanBase: The IWC (gets varying reactions in the arenas, but will be worshiped like a god and defended until the end by internet fans; literally has thousands of online dorks logging on to complain anytime they lose a match or don't get pushed right)
Dolly opens the front door to her humble abode to find that a party had been planned in her honoring. Though she was well aware of the obvious party due to the litany of cars parked outside and the loud reverb of music vibrating from the outer walls; she did what she could to act as pleasantly surprised as possible, and to her credit, the radiant blush growing on her face was very natural.
She was genuinely excited to see such an outpouring from her good friends, and the cause was indeed just; you only first become a teenager once.
“O-M-Geez guys! Thank ya’ll sooo much!”
In front of her is a seemingly endless sea of smiling faces from her classmates, complimented by Paul Heyman, Zane Kingsly, Equinox, Dolly's childhood friend Big Rhonda... and what's this?
"Happy coming of teen my young blood blossom."
Sitting at the end of the oval shaped wooden table in the center of the kitchen is a shirtless Morbid Angel, equipped with a pair of tight leather pants and an all too perfect blood stained chest.
"MORBY!"
Dolly shrieks, jumps and kicks her heels in excitement as she rushes over to her former teacher, and God Father, nearly tackling him out of his chair as she reaches in and gives him an 'awe' worthy hug.
"Aaaaawwwweeeee!"
The crowd of guests cloyingly spew in unison as Dolly hugs her mentor, but suddenly both Dolly and Morbid jerk their heads around, sending an icy glare to the guests as they fall silent; somehow even the music stopped with an all too common sound of a scratching needle across a vinyl album. Pretty sure there's not even a record player in this house, and the music was being streamed through Pandora. Fucking strange...
But the two soon smile back at everyone as the entire party shares a cheesy, sitcom-ish laugh as the music and the festivities resume.
"Morby! it's been fer'ever!"
Dolly hadn't seen Morbid in exactly a year... since her laaassssst biiirrrrr....
[cue the typical flashback screen transition with magical sound effects]
biiiirrrrtttthhhhhdddaaayyyy....
Sunday, November 1st(Dolly's Birthday!!!), 2015
Morbid Angel's Mansion
Morbidonia, Maine, USA
We see a younger, but still impeccably elegant Dolly Waters sitting with Morbid in a dimly lit dining room a giant medieval styled table separates the two as they each sit on opposite ends of the dining slab.
"How is your pirog na den' rozhdeniya?"
That's Russian for Birthday Pie. Yes, it is Russian tradition, rather than cake, you receive a pie for your birthday.
"Ohhh it's wonderful..."
She replied with a bit of a gag, the pie was sloppily thrown together with pumpkin filling and crushed beats, also known as a blood pie.
"Happy Birthday, Dolly... I have prepared a number for you."
Wearing only a pair of pink underwear, Morbid rises from his seat and grabs an accordion. The instrument begins wailing out an awkward tune as Morbid yells over the melody,
"ANOTHER RUSSIAN TRADITION! THIS IS THE BIRTHDAY SONG!"
♫♫♫Never mind that the clumsy pedestrians are jumping over rain puddles.
And that the water is streaming down the street.
And never mind that the passers-by can’t make sense of
Why is it that I’m so happy on such a rainy day.
Yet I’m playing my accordion
In front of everyone on the street.
It’s so sad that a birthday
Can only happen once a year.
A wizard will suddenly appear
In a blue helicopter,
And will show me free movies.
He’ll say Happy Birthday
And just before he flies away
He’ll probably leave 500 ice cream cones for me.♫♫♫
Dolly's eyes widen as she claps wildly in applause to Morbid who is graciously bowing now as the song has ended. Morbid smiles back, but suddenly tightens his brow and begins breathing heavily... abruptly, he throws his accordion to the floor, smashing it into dozens of pieces causing Dolly to jump back into her seat. Morbid stomps into the other room, his stomping remains loud but grows steadily distant before the sounds cease.
Dolly looks confused.
The stomps begin again and now they grow louder and louder before...
"I have one last thing for you..."
Morbid reappears holding some sorta' of shoddily wrapped item. He walks over to Dolly and hands her the item, she looks excited as she begins to rip away the shit colored wrapping paper.
It's a book.
"Sun Tzu's: 'The Art of War'?"
"If you read this book, and take with you the lessons, along with everything I've taught you: all of the training, all of the HGH Steroid gains, all of the innocent animals sacrificed... when I see you again, you will be the great warrior you desire to be. You will be a true champion, not just of your foes, but a champion of yourself...
VICTORY FOREVER!!!"
"Wait, wuddya' mean when you see me again?"
"Dolly, tonight will be your last night in Morbidonia. You have the proper teachings, and you've greatly exceeded my expectations. You're now ready to begin your journey of restoring the Waters name in the XWF."
Dolly gulps a bit, looking initially reluctant at first, but after a moment or so, cutely reassures her mentor with a firm nod. Morbid replies with a nod. Dolly stands and aggressively hugs her best friend, a single tear running down her cheek as Morbid exhales a sigh of relief and pats his prepubescent pupil on the head.
[cue the typical flashback screen transition with magical sound effects]
...Back to Dolly's Present (No Pun Intended) Birthday...
"Morby! it's been fer'ever!"
"Indeed it has... and just as I told you many moons ago..."
Morbid looks down at the Hart Title on Dolly's waist,
"...You're a true champion now."
Dolly blushes,
"A whole year... Gosh I missed you."
"In the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years."
Dolly laughs and punches Morbid in the shoulder,
"Don't be so cliche Morby!"
Dolly turns back and begins entertaining some of her guests, and after a few moments she's met with a hug from a smiling Paul Heyman,
"Happy Birthday, Dolly. I can't tell you enough just how honored I am to have you as my client. Here I got a little something for you.
She opens the box to find a pair of boxing gloves, with an illegible scribble across the top across the top of one of them,
"Boxing gloves, Paul?"
"Signed by the great one, Mohammad Ali himself."
"Oh wow! I couldn't really make out the signature..."
"Yeah, that Parkinsons is a helluva disease. I got this signature from him, just a couple of weeks before he passed, was going to hang onto them for myself, but I thought they deserved to be with a real fighting champion, not collecting dust in my house."
"Wow! You've really outdone yer'sel huh? The gangs all here!"
Dolly looks around and sees Zane and Equinox fighting over the last Quiznos sub sandwich, and turns back to Heyman,
"But where's Luca?"
A long line of children grabbing at their crotches is beginning to form outside of the bathroom. One boy begins pounding on the door,
"C'MON MISTER! I'VE REALLY GOTTA GO!"
...SNIFF...
...SNORT...
...SIGH...
...HACK...
"Alright, alright! Hold onto to ya' pussy fuccboi!"
Inside of the restroom we see a sweaty looking Luca Arzegotti snorting a thick rail of Columbian bam-bam off of the back of Dolly's toilet. Luca takes the whole line and stumbles back into the wall. He glances into the mirror, rubbing the palm of his hand up from the bottom of his nose as he inhales deeply.
The #Meme Queen bursts outta the bathroom, lifting the little snot nosed kid's baseball cap off, ruffling his hair up, and putting his hat on his own head backwards.
"GET THE FUCK OUTTA' THE WAY LOSER! I'VE GOTTA SHIT!"
"Haha! Yeah, you definitive, on point, one of Dolly's friends."
Luca keeps fucking with the kid, blocking his entrance into the bathroom a few times as he tries to enter, before finally moving out of the way as the other kids in line begin to scream at him.
He finally makes his way down stairs, pointing out Dolly with more of an incognizant 'aahhhh' sound rather than an actual verbal recognition. He gives the pint sized champ a fist bump, but suddenly there's a knock at the door.
Dolly turns around and swings the door open. Her arms instantly fold as sher snarls her lip up.
"H-h-hey there Doll baby...Happy Birthday!"
It's Muddy Waters, Dolly's piece of shit father who abandoned her... He's looking a mite rough and stinking of booze.
"Hey Dolly, want us to kick the shit outta' this low-life?"
Zane asks her, and standing next to him are Luca, who's cracking his knuckles, Morbid and Equinox,
"Nuh fellas, it's smooth, I've got this..."
Dolly steps further out onto her porch, closing the door behind her,
"Listen... I know you aint want me round' no more, hell, I aint deserve ta' be around. Yer' more ah' man than me, and yer' a thirteen year old girl."
Dolly was shocked that he knew how old she was
"I aint ah askin' fer' another chance at raisin' ya', yer' doin' that just fine..."
"Yeah, no thanks to you..."
"I know, I know... I just wanted to look at you again, and not through a TV screen in some rat-den motel room. You've always deserved so much better than anythang me or yer' momma' could give. You always desevered the moon and the stars, and now look at'cha'... YER' A STAR ALL BY YER'SELF!
Muddy is glowingly drunk as his words slur. Dolly stands there impartial, arms still crossed as her foot taps.
"Anyhow, I brought ya' this..."
Muddy goes to hand Dolly a small gift,
"You can leave it on the ground... and you can leave."
Muddy nods, slightly smiles, and does as his daughter wishes. Dolly waits a few minuets, and as our heronie notices her father is out of sight, she bends down onto her knees and picks up the gift. She fumbles with it a bit as she rips away the paper, dropping the gift as a sound of glass breaking can be heard. The birthday girl gasps, and grabs at her mouth with one hand as her shaking hand lifts up a broken picture frame.
Inside of it is a photo of Dolly and her father, from when she was about six. They were sitting in Freedom Hall in Louisville, Kentucky at Dolly's first ever wrestling event she attended. Still shaking she gingerly pulls the photo out of the frame from behind the broken glass. Several tears begin to run down her face as she turns the photo over, reading the note her father left for her there:
Remember when I took you to see our favorite wrestler, CM Punk? Now you're my favorite wrestler...
Give em' hell kid.
Love,
Dad
"That'll do pig... that'll do..."
Dolly, ever quizzically looks up over her shoulder to see Morbid Angel,
"Go to him..."
Dolly stands up and dusts herself off, folding the picture up and sticking it in her back pocket,
"Um, no? I have a party to attend."
Dolly marches back inside as Morbid remains on the porch, starring off into the sky as he hums:
"It's my party, and I cry if I want to, cry if I want to, you would cry too if it happened to you..."
"Fuck you, Morby!"
Dolly hollers out from the distance, causing Morbid to jump as the scene fades...
4x XTreme Champion (1x as Misty Waters)
2x Tag Team Champion (w/ Vita Valenteen, w/ Charlie Nickles)
2x Hart Champion
3x Television Champion
4x Star Of The Month
August '24(As Misty Waters), August ‘21, May ‘17, October ‘16
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