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drezdin5788 · **02-08-2016, 05:52 PM**

Who ever is the best rp'er around, I want feed back in that I totally fucked on my rp. What I do wrong.

Morbid Angel · **02-08-2016, 09:59 PM**

Well right there you are asking for trouble. "The best role-player around" will either show who is self centered and stuck up their own ass or a lot of people who are taking the piss.

If you want feedback you just need to ask.

If you want to know where you fucked up (which in itself sounds like you are doubting the validity of the loss).

In any case....I am not the best role-player around but if you link the role-plays here I will look at them and PM you feedback. I will be brutally honest so before you ask for feedback you need to think about if you actually want real, honest feedback AND if you can handle it. I will not insult you but I will tell you if I see any issues that could/will hurt you.

Mr Killjoy · **02-08-2016, 10:10 PM**

Justice Drake is your guy, don't listen to Morbid he sucks.

Mr Killjoy · (02-09-2016)

But I was waiting for Drake to give feedback...

Fine... Drezdin, one thing that strikes out to me is you use the same font color for everything, switch it up, have a different font color for descriptive text and another one for talking text, and give different people different colors for talk text to help differentiate.

Also your chosen font size for your RPs is a little TOO big in my opinion, scale it down a bit. Your trash talk and descriptive narrative is fine but very short, RPs should ideally be around 2-3k. Expand on things, go into more detail when setting scenes, trash talk your opponent more, or develop your character more and give more insight into them (theres numerous ways you can do that e.g simply have your character talk about their motives, their experiences, their general life to give the reader more insight on your character and their personality and background).

Lastly, before you post an RP, proof read it for spelling and grammar mistakes, and after you've posted it, proof read again just in case.

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (02-09-2016)

They're all trolling.

You aren't bad. You just need to crank it to eleven.

Morbid doesn't suck. Sounds like Austin/Trax v Black Hand sometime, gentlemen. 6 rp minimum/team.

Mr Killjoy · (02-09-2016)

lol it wouldn't make much sense Trax teaming with Fern, but who knows.

Morbid Angel · **02-09-2016, 12:31 AM**

You saying Fern is Racist?

Mr Killjoy · **02-09-2016, 12:39 AM**

Fern wishes he was black, he craves dat brown sugar.

drezdin5788 · **02-09-2016, 09:18 AM**

Let me ask y'all this then, my character(drezdin) feels that when he's facing some one weather if the person is new or a seasoned veteran that if he listens to his father and go old school by looking to see if there's any info on the person to use to his advantage won't do any good half the time. Especially the opponent that he is facing, how do I put that in?

By the way thanks for the feed back, and to trax, I'm changing the color and the font right now.

~~Tyrone Jackson~~ · **02-09-2016, 09:24 AM**

Is English your first language?

drezdin5788 · **02-09-2016, 11:08 AM**

Huh?

Thomas Girard · **02-09-2016, 11:57 AM**

He's asking you if you learned English first. He's just curious since you do make a lot of spelling and grammatical errors whenever you post something.

Morbid Angel · **02-09-2016, 06:36 PM**

LINKS!

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