Let's set the scene, shall we?

It's Pittsburgh in the middle of February.

The air temperature reads zero.

Yes.

Zero.

Wind of 25 plus miles per hour.

Windchills of 20 degrees below zero.

Or colder.

It's snowing.

Defrost barely keeps up with the melt, then refreeze of the snow/ice on your windshield.

You work in an unheated warehouse.

Your warmest coat, bought especially for work, now has a broken zipper.

You drive to Walmart.

Yes Walmart.

To buy a new one.

Only to.

Not buy the coat.

Instead, I bought Beef Jerky to reinforce my manhood, then chocolate to cure my depression.

Why didn't I buy the coat?

Its the middle of February in the frigid cold north and retail chains decide its time to pack away all the coats and bring out swimming trunks and light clothing. Apparently in the frozen north, its "lets pack all the cold stuff away and bring out all the warm stuff" season! Not to mention the fact that there's only 2... TWO! fucking registers open! 30 people in each line. Oh, and when they finally decide to open up a third register, the dumb cunt decides she'd rather text on her fucking phone rather than do her god damn job!

Congratulations!

Congratulations WalMart, on sucking even by your standards!

Someone gimme a beer!

I got a few winter coats. Want one?

I also got a lot of beer. Want one of those too?

Get good.

Come on Holiday to New Zealand or Australia. Very hot here.

Why not go to Target?

Walmart''s half owned by a Kiwi. One of his sons plays Rugby League in Australia for Manly Sea Eagles.

Useless bit of information for you.

(02-14-2015, 06:03 PM)Ozymandias Said: I got a few winter coats. Want one?

I also got a lot of beer. Want one of those too?

This coat is rugged. Like Carhart, to stand up to elements and hard work.

Yes on the beer tho.

(02-14-2015, 06:06 PM)Kendall Savannah Sawyer Said: Get good.

I can't get any better. I'm already the best.

(02-14-2015, 06:11 PM)Mastermind Said: Come on Holiday to New Zealand or Australia. Very hot here.

Too hot. And plane disappear in dat ocean.

(02-14-2015, 06:19 PM)Pest Said: Why not go to Target?

because Target was too far from work.

(02-14-2015, 06:52 PM)Mastermind Said: Walmart''s half owned by a Kiwi. One of his sons plays Rugby League in Australia for Manly Sea Eagles.

Useless bit of information for you.

Indeed.

Manly Sea Eagles? Australia is so weird.

use the self check out, dick

fuck walmart!!!

SUCK... MY... DICK!

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(02-14-2015, 09:02 PM)Burger King John Said: use the self check out, dick

Why? They don't pay me. In fact, that's like doing a job someone else is paid to do, THEN giving them the money anyway. I'll pass. I refuse to use self-checkout anywhere.

(02-14-2015, 10:54 PM)Peter Fn Gilmour Said: fuck walmart!!!

Indeed.

Did you get your coat from Walmart? Bring the busted one and tell them you bought it and it's a size too small. They may not sell them but they might exchange them.

(02-14-2015, 11:26 PM)Dick E. Said: Did you get your coat from Walmart? Bring the busted one and tell them you bought it and it's a size too small. They may not sell them but they might exchange them.

I did buy it at Walmart, but my coat has been through the ringer. Grease/oil stains, things like that. I've had it over a year. I'd buy a different brand but it keeps me ridiculously warm in the cold weather. Kinda want to stick with it. Something I didn't mention in the rant, is I was going to see if someone could get one from the back (surely they have them still) but as typically is the case with that shit hole of a store, there's never any reps around.