The Chosen one feedback - Printable Version +- X-treme Wrestling Federation (https://xwf99.com) +-- Forum: XWF OOC (https://xwf99.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=15) +--- Forum: Out Of Character (OOC) Board (https://xwf99.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=29) +--- Thread: The Chosen one feedback (/showthread.php?tid=2510) |
The Chosen one feedback - Gamegenie - 04-28-2013 the Chosen one Here come my newest rp ^^ any negative though our positive is welcome as usual. Good reading =) The Chosen one feedback - Steve "KingSlayer" Davids - 05-01-2013 Your clearly good with your dialogue but I don't like the fact I cannot picture what any of your characters look like due to lack of description. The humour is good, I assume you are trying to make your character look stupid in a way? Not sure stupid is the right word, childish maybe? Other than that it is good but work on your grammar too. That's all I can say really... RE: The Chosen one feedback - Gamegenie - 05-01-2013 (05-01-2013, 01:43 AM)SteveDavids Said: Your clearly good with your dialogue but I don't like the fact I cannot picture what any of your characters look like due to lack of description. The humour is good, I assume you are trying to make your character look stupid in a way? Not sure stupid is the right word, childish maybe? Other than that it is good but work on your grammar too. That's all I can say really... Thanks for your though about my rp,, i'll try my best to improve the grammar for sure. As for the lack of description, i try my best to find good word to make everyone understand, but it's not easy when you have french like first language and those words doesn't come out quickly so i struggle a l'il bit lol. And for your question about the direction of my character, yes i make goofy because using humor suit him very well. XWF love funny gimmick like my character ( i guess) and the Senator ^^. Maybe i found a way to develop his trash talk. If any of you have some suggestion to make my character evolve, i'll take it . RE: The Chosen one feedback - Steve "KingSlayer" Davids - 05-03-2013 (05-01-2013, 04:35 PM)Gamegenie Said:(05-01-2013, 01:43 AM)SteveDavids Said: Your clearly good with your dialogue but I don't like the fact I cannot picture what any of your characters look like due to lack of description. The humour is good, I assume you are trying to make your character look stupid in a way? Not sure stupid is the right word, childish maybe? Other than that it is good but work on your grammar too. That's all I can say really... Ah, I apologize. I didn't realize that French was your first language, in that case your grammar is pretty impressive. Your character is certainly unique and I enjoyed reading your RP. |