Vinnie Lane sits in his office in his pink chair with his pink desk and his pink wallpaper and pink drapes with his legs kicked back up onto his desk relaxing as if he were in a hammock on the beach. He's surrounded with an assortment of pink and purple pumpkins with candles glowing on their insides, along with pink spiderwebs with tiny plastic purple spiders crawling all over them. An assortment of balls with white sheets over their heads and eyes carved out to look like mini ghosts hanging from a bit of yarn from the ceiling. The hippie sits there with his hair slicked back with his purple bandanna resting halfway over his eyes just rummaging around on his cell phone barely even really paying attention to it. It looks as if the vagabond looking mother fucker is likely just drifting off into sleep or is being hypnotized by the addictive horrors of social media into a trance of never-ending escape. Suddenly a giant...
































































WHAP!!!

...hits the side of the window that was directly behind him. This startles him and gets his attention like a slap on the back of the head and forces him to turn around and discover what had struck his window. He's disgusted to see some type of half rat / half bat-like looking creature with membranous black furry wings and sharp bucktooth faces. It twitches for a few moments before going completely limp and dying. The strange look of these flying critters was disturbing indeed, but what intrigued Vinnie Lane even more, was when he noticed that in its clawed feet it held what appeared to be some type of sealed letter. The free-spirited looking flower child opens the window and retrieves said sealed letter and brings it inside to his office. He turns it over and it has an inverted pentagram engraved on the back, and as he turns it over he sees a pink lipstick mark that looks like it was made from some sexy chic sealing the front of the envelope.

Vinnie Lane: "What the hell kind of Harry Potter shit is this?"

He starts to lower his lips towards the pink lipstick to kiss it; however, his nose barely makes it six inches away before his nose gets a whiff of something foul and putrid which causes him to first cough, gag, and nearly puke as he wipes a small bit of saliva off his lips and a tiny bead of sweat off his forehead with his right hand. He opens the letter quickly and discovers another envelope sealed with another pink lipstick mark much smaller than the first one. However, his attention is drawn to an invitation that was the other card inside the initial envelope, and holds it far away from his face, forcing him to put on his reader's glasses as he reads it from far away which probably isn't so bad with all things smelled considered.

You are cordially invited to the birthday of Unknown Soldier on Haloween night for the.... 666th ANNUAL ANAL ASSRAPING SUPER HALLOWEEN SCAT SHOW EXTRAVAGANZA!!!! ...a 'mud' show XWF wrestling special in Shane 's back yard where you'll see matches like!!!!!!! crimson dong vs. frodo smackins ~~Rape Until They Date Match~~ Sebastian Duke vs. Theo Pryce & Vinnie Lane & James Raven ~~Mysterious Mighty Masturbation Mayhem Match~~ Shane vs. Unknown Soldier UNIVERSAL TITLE MATCH ~~Seven Layers of Scat and Relentless Rape Match~~

Vinnie Lane crumples up the paper immediately and shoots it into the wastebasket off in the corner in the opposite side of the room, sinking it perfectly from a long distance.

Vinnie Lane: "KOBE!"

He laughs and shakes his head.

Vinnie Lane: "I'd use it for toilet paper but I'm afraid those sick fucks will actually like that."

His curiosity gets the best of him as he opens the other envelope with the even smaller pink lipstick mark on it. Inside he finds two polaroid pictures. One is of Unknown Soldier putting pink lipstick on Scatbear's lips, immediately upon seeing this Vinnie barfs all over his pink desk turning it a horrible shade of green. He dares to turn over the other polaroid picture to see Unknown Soldier putting pink lipstick on Scatbear's asshole. Once he sees this he immediately reaches for a bottle of hand sanitizer on his desk and just starts squirting it all over himself. Holding it over his head and pouring it over the top of his hair as if showering himself in the disinfecting liquid. He unscrews the top and dumps the entire bottle on top of himself and starts rubbing it all over his body as the scene cuts to black.

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Peter Gilmour is seen nailing some super sexy chic in his luscious mansion with giant pictures of himself everywhere of his enormous cock and huge muscles all over the place. He's on a royal red silk satin king size bed just plowing this sexy slut like a jackhammer on the sidewalk with beads of sweat dripping off the end of his forehead while she screams various obscenities at the top of her lungs in pure ecstasy. When suddenly his cell phone starts going off on the desk on the side of the bed with the song 'Just the Two of Us' by Will Smith as the ring tone. He drops the bitch like a bad habit and she falls off the bed and onto the floor as he stops fucking her and reaches over to answer the cell phone. It must be an important call as the woman on the floor pulls herself up and gives Peter a scowl who simply waves her off as he brings the phone to his ear.....

Peter Gilmour: "Soldier, what's up bub?"

Unknown Soldier: "You coming to my birthday party tonight, right Peter?"

Peter Gilmour: "The only girls you have at your parties are those weird SATAN! worshipping sluts that like to drink blood and sacrifice goats and babies and shit. Like that new girlfriend of yours, Isabella Ravenwolf. They all end up worshipping my SUPER! dick in the end ;) but still I'm not interested in those fucking weird emo chics tonight, sorry bub."

Unknown Soldier: "We've got all kinds of sluts coming tonight, Peter. I invited Jenny Myst!"

The sexy woman who Peter was fucking was on the floor and crawled back up onto the bed and started making her head over towards Peter's crotch. Peter slaps her away and she goes flying back onto the floor again.

Peter Gilmour: "Where's the party at?"

You can hear on the other side of the receiver that someone is struggling with Unknown Soldier to speak on the phone when suddenly a familiar voice comes from the other end.

Shane : "Will have lots of dick too, Peter! LOTS OF DICK!"

You can hear Soldier fighting Shane back for the phone on the other end as he regains control of the speaker.

Unknown Soldier: "Sorry about that, bub."

The Xtreme Icon clearly looks upset and he yells at Soldier back through the phone.

Peter Gilmour: "I told you that I would appear in your promos as long as there wasn't any of that kind of ass shit anymore!"

Peter hangs up the cell phone and then slaps the sexy slut on the ass and goes back to mashing and mangling her pussy like a meat grinder.

---------------------------

Unknown Soldier: "Peter! Peter! You there?!?!"

Shane : "He hung up on you, come on, we can't stall this main event match any longer."

Suddenly, the scene cuts to the other end of the phone call where Soldier and Shane were standing in Shane's back yard standing opposite one another in a homemade wrestling ring that's just absolutely covered in mounds and mounds of feces. No fans are anywhere in sight and the only other two people are crimson dong and Sebastian Duke sitting in a booth in a tree hanging over the ring. Two microphones sitting in front of them giving play-by-play commentary over the entire back yard wrestling show. As the camera zooms in on the two, crimson dong reaches over and tries to grab Duke's dick, but before he can Duke grabs the back of his head and just chucks him off the tree and into a lawn chair sitting on the side of the ring. He goes in headfirst taking a nosedive and hits his head on some pavement and passes out from a likely concussion.

Sebastian Duke: "Looks like it's going to be a one-man booth tonight, folks! crimson dong won the dark match at the beginning of the night as frodo smackins was counted out by forfeit since he has been deceased ever since he was accidentally burned up by Shane and Madison Dyson in some skeezy night club somewhere."

The camera cuts to a replay of crimson dong using his dick as a pogo-stick bouncing around the ring while a referee makes a count-out to an empty crowd.

Sebastian Duke: "The same result took place when none of my opponents showed up to the ring!"

The camera cuts back to another replay of Sebastian Duke walking around in the center of the ring with his hands in the air while a referee counts out Vinnie, Theo, and James.

Sebastian Duke: "So that leaves us with only our main event of the evening. As Unknown Soldier will go to battle and defend his Universal Title against the one and only Shane in the infamous Seven Layers of Scat and Relentless Rape match, I mean, where the hell else could you have a match like that other than Shane 's back yard!"

The two lock eyes awaiting the bell to ring and glare at each other deeply as Soldier spits across the ring in Shane's mouth and Shane reciprocates the same spit that lands directly in Soldier's mouth that he catches in mid-air and swallows whole. A parade of cement trucks filled to the brim with feces come rolling down the street and heading for the ring. The camera pans back to Sebastian Duke who starts calling the match as the bell rings and the two competitors begin to fight over the XWF's biggest prize. The camera stays on him the entire time as none of the match is actually broadcast, but only heard as cement trucks keep slopping piles of shit in the ring. Sebastian calls the match as we are forced to watch him do it.

Sebastian Duke: "This is the most EPIC match in all of eternity as these two are literally kicking the ever-living shit in and out of each other. This will go down in history as the greatest Universal title match of all time as these two are just raping the fuck out of each other. HARD! They just rape each other back and forth and back and forth and this thing looks like it might never end! The two battle like galactic warriors for six hundred and sixty-six hours straight. But wait! It looks like Shane is making the cover!"

The camera pans back to the center of the ring where both Shane and Soldier are covered in blood, piss, shit, and bruises and it looks like they have been fighting each other forever. Shane makes the cover and the guest referee in the seventh layer of shit, is, of course, Scatbear who goes down to make the count....

1.....2.......3! A very quick count!

Shane : "I did it! I'm the new Universal Champion! Scully ain't got shit on me! But I got lots of shit on this title belt."

Shane reaches into a mound of shit and pulls the Universal Title out of it and then wraps it around his waist and starts parading around the ring. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out Chronic Chris Page's ponytail and holds it up to the back of his neck and starts galloping around the ring like a horse.

Shane : "Look everyone! I'm 9/10 the Universal Champion and 1/10 some shitty wrestler! HaHa!"

Soldier catches him with a clothesline as Shane slips on a banana peel and he goes down hard. Soldier makes the cover and Scatbear goes down to make the count again with this time Soldier on top of Shane. 1.....2.......3! Soldier grabs the Universal Title from a lifeless Shane and holds it up over his head as shit rains down over his head. He turns his head up in the air as if he was trying to catch it in his mouth but right before we get to that point the screen fizzles and cuts to black.

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"When I got done watching both of Scully's promos this week I realized immediately that this mother fucker comes from the school of frodo smackins trash talk, because from the moment he opens his mouth he immediately forfeits any sense of intelligence about any of the subjects we were discussing and then sprinkles it in with a couple of troll-like silly jokes that can only land in a fifth grade boys locker room after P.E. class! It's really an odd and strange feeling I get when I think about his title reign in 2016 and the reason it even occurred in the first place under that dwarf's dumbass time spent here pulling strings in parts of the XWF.

Is it really that odd of a coincidence that these two types of sad and pathetic attempts at humor saddle bagged off of one another back then and are the types of people who slap their dicks together every time they call someone a or a wanker. I wouldn’t be surprised if you got your one push around here because another just like you thought you were amusing a little bit. This whole time back then I was giving Vinnie shit for not forcing you to defend your title like a man when I should have been pointing fingers at Scully, Ghost Tank, and frodo smackins. AKA Larry, Curly, and Moe! Three morons that wouldn't know how to tell a funny joke if it came by and popped them in the fucking head!

It's not ironic that Scully would mention the bookies and money you would lose by betting on him this week since he probably has a gambling problem since 2016 when he decided he was going to AUCTION for a Universal title shot so that he can have enough Xbux to feed his family. That's right, a fucking auction to decide who he thinks would be honorable and 'earn' the right to wrestle him for his Universal Title. Not me everyone, you know, the guy at the time who was the Xtreme Champion for 182 days and defending that title weekly in the main event on Warfare for six months straight against everyone that challenged him and never backed down. Nope, he would rather have it against drezdin!

That's right everyone, if Scully would have had it his way he would have been facing off against Drezdin rather than Peter Gilmour. I got a feeling the outcome would have been the same regardless since Scully is such a worthless sack of shit and would have lost to drezdin too in his first Universal title defense! Get this everyone, the fucking guy he talked shit about me defending against after my match with Robert Main at Relentless was worthy enough FOR HIM TO DEFEND AGAINST back then! Take a look at who was his highest bidder so many years ago in his stupid little auction of his!"

(07-30-2016, 06:12 AM)drezdin5788 Said: 12k right here for ya you biatch

(08-05-2016, 03:58 AM)Scully Said: "This auction ended like two days ago, that's how much I gave a fuck about it. Well once again, you were all putty in my hands but we do have a winner...
Dredzin come on down and give me my 12k. Vinnie or Frodo make the damn match now!"

"MOTHER

FUCKING

DREZDIN!

I honestly don't think even Chronic Chris Page contradicted himself as much as Scully has and he ran his mouth ten times as much! The titles of his promos this week about his mind betraying him are more fitting than he probably even realizes. Because clearly when he came up with his verbal effluvia to throw at me this week he didn't do his homework and remember every stupid fucking thing that he's said in the past that continues to make himself look even more foolish today.

I laughed really hard when he said he's not afraid of me but then begs me throughout the entirety of his promos not to rape him. I laugh even harder when he says stupid things like he wasn't a coward by going 120 days as Universal Champion without defending the title once. duh hurrr "nobody gets a' title shot" duh hurrr! You better tell me you're pretending to be a again when you make stupid statements like that. He was supposed to beat Peter easily and then go on to take on the winner of the chamber match but instead lost to him and his Universal title legacy fell flatter than his jokes.

You better not ever bring up Ghost Tank's name at all in any form of back and forth banter with me. Because not only did you lose the Universal title to Peter, but you lost the Xtreme title to Ghost Tank as well. The belt that he strived for years to get and the rest of us all kept it from him as a joke to keep him crying for years. YOU RUINED THAT INSIDE JOKE TOO! You see, Scully's career is nothing but an inside joke that everyone made to each other, and he was so sad and pathetic that it actually came true. People for years would joke about Peter becoming Universal Champion.

Everyone made fun of Ghost Tank for years because we kept the Xtreme title away from him that he wanted so badly to retrieve. What does Scully do? Lose to fucking both of them and drop those respective titles to them, and now the old inside joke is a fucking reality! Thankfully Vinne put a stop to your nonsense and ended that silly auction you tried to pull off years ago, or else drezdin as Universal Champion inside joke would have probably come true!

Do you really think your winning in this exchange with me? When you can't even string together a coherent sentence to try and explain yourself or an insult that involves more than five words in the sentence? Don't try to come out here and walk through elimination by elimination in some Gauntlet Match from 2016 and try to explain yourself when the fact of the matter is you didn't have a match earlier in the evening and Peter and me did. That's a fact and you can try to weasel your way out of that and try to twist your tongue in whatever way you wish, it's still not going to get you anywhere because just like your failure to defend the Universal title it's obvious that your snake in the grass techniques was at their finest for that Gauntlet so many years ago.

It's no different when you try to explain yourself when you say that you 'actually accepted my challenge' years ago but wanted to have some agreement that I wouldn't cash in after the match? I may need a psychiatrist to get my brain figured out, but I'm not even going to walk you through the stupidity of that statement you made because I don't have time to call up the characters from Sesame Street to provide you with flashcards and explain your foolish and simplistic mind.

He's right about one thing though. I do need a good wank. Because for the past three years he's done nothing but piss me the fuck off with his stupidity and cowardice. That's why I've been saving up that wank and not ejaculating for three years. So that when I get him in that ring and rape him real good, I can blow my massive three-year load all over his face and embarrass him beyond belief!"