Tri Bute: Our Future Lord, Our Great Future King: A Biographical Future Comic
ISSUE #18 (Part 3)
Execution: Sec Urity

Previously on ISSUE #18:

“That’s what Zeusrion would do, right?”

“If he stood in your future shoes, yes.”

“Your future sponge bath awaits!”

“My great future king, the future geologist is here,”

“It seems something has upset the future rocks, my great future king.”

"No, shut up. Tell the future rocks that the great future king has better things to do."

“They said if they don’t hear something from you in thirteen future minutes there will be a huge future earthquake on the Future Ryan Future Fault. That’ll fuck up the future symphony, right?”

“Alright future rock king, let’s have a future,” Tri Bute put on his future sunglasses, “Chert!”



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“Where’s the future king?” shouted Mag Ma as he future stepped into the future ballroom.

“You just missed him. What’s the future problem, Mag? This is far from your future post!” said Head of Security Mel Odramatic.

“Yea, you future work in the future dungeon, right?”

“I need to find the future king. Where is he?” asked Mag Ma again! He then slammed his future fist on the future table. This must have been really important!

“He went in the future rock tunnel to the future king’s palace.”

Mag Ma turned and future ran towards that future corridor.

“Wait! You can’t go down future there!”

“There isn’t enough future time!” shouted Mag Ma as he future dived into the future tunnel.

“Don’t just stand there! Go after him!” future ordered Mel, but his future underling didn’t future move.

“I-I can’t!”

“Why not?”

“My future legs!”

“What about them?”

“The future transformation! It’s beginning!”

“No!”

Mel thrust his future palms into Sec’s future chest, repeatedly! Sec’s future body began to shake and squirm. His future arms flapped in the future air and he collapsed to the future floor. His future face displayed a hurt future expression, almost a future grimace, but I wouldn't necessarily describe it as one.

“Keep future breathing! I need you to future breathe!”

“I can future breathe!”

“Then I’ll stop hitting you in the future chest.”

Mel didn’t know his own future strength sometimes. He didn’t mean to beat up his future co-worker, it was for his own future safety!

“Can you help me up, future sir. I can’t future move or future see anything.”

Mel grabbed Sec Urity by his future arms and pulled him up, but something was different about him.

“Your future legs!”

Urity’s future legs were future stonified. They were one hundred future percent solid future rock.

“Oh my Zeusrion!” Mel took a future step back. “Somebody get me a future doctor because,” Mel put on his future sunglasses, “his future legs, just got...future rocked.”



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Future rocks suck. They’re dirty. They’re all over the future place. They’re dumb. I’m just so future mad!

“Okay, where’s the future rock king!” Tri Bute punched a future rock right in its rocky future face. “I’m future mad.”

The future rock couldn't future answer him. Well, it did future answer him, but Tri Bute couldn't future speak future Rock. Tri Bute tossed the future rock after what seemed like future MINUTES of future torture. He future knew there was only way to go, so he future walked forward and kept future walking. Until it him.

FUTURE OW!

Tri Bute stopped dead in his future tracks; his future eyes squinted at the unexpected future sight. For ten future minutes he had future walked down this future path; he future thought he’d get somewhere, but he couldn’t be more wrong.

“Sealed shut! Grievous Crisp, son of Zeusrion, I just want to future kill my damn great grandfather! Why are you making this so difficult? Do you want me to future beg and future pray for you some more, future asshole?”

The sound of Tri Bute’s future voice future echoed throughout the future cavern. Some future dust fell from future overhead. He wanted to keep going forward, and future talk to the sucky, dirty, all over the future place, dumb, future rocks, but even he couldn’t future walk through future walls. He looked around for future help, but no one was there. He never future felt so alone, not since all those future years ago. Tri Bute looked down at his future shoes.

If Zeusrion was in those future shoes what would he do?

He was running out of future time. He didn’t have future time to think about this kind of thing. If he could future talk to future rocks he’d be able to go through here. But, he couldn’t to future talk to future rocks. He didn’t future create them.

You can’t future talk to what you didn’t future create!

I remember when my future jeans told me that. I said it was dumb, but now I realize it may be the future answer to my future problem.

Tri Bute looked deeply into the future rock wall. He could find a way to future create it. However, he realized the glaring future logical flaw in the whole future idea.

No it is dumb. I didn’t future create my future pants. How did I future talk to them then?

Unless…..

No, not unless. I future think I’ll go future insane in this damn future tunnel.

I need to future talk to this future rock wall, that’s all I know for sure.

Well, okay, it’s not all I know. They were always future telling Grievous Crisp that. “Only the Sift future deal in future absolutes,” so I shouldn’t future deal in future absolutes, right? The Sift aren’t right to do that, right? That future statement was a future example of me future dealing in future absolutes, right?

I’m done. I’m limiting myself to four future sentences of future thoughts after this; I’ve done too much future thinking.

I need more future doing in my future life. I can’t go future crawling back to the future geologist now. Would future begging that future virgin-birthed ‘chosen one’ child murderer be any better? I’ve done more demeaning things in the future past, I suppose.

Tri Bute assumed future praying position by putting his future hands together in front of his future face and future kneeling down. Once his future eyes were clasped tight and freed from their future man-made protective future covering, he began to future pray.

“Fine, Grievous Crisp, future miracle worker,

I know I don’t do this often, but I just have a few future things I need to get off my future chest and a future request to make.

1. Your dad is awesome. I like him, he has future blessed me.

2. I never quite got over all the murders you committed. I future heard that you saved your mentor many times. I never actually future saw any of that though. So it was kind of weird when he was saying stuff like, “You were my brother, Grievous Crisp. I loved you”, but I should have a willing future suspension of future disbelief, I presume. I can get future over it. The murders and the future logic gap.

3. You always kind of seemed a future tad off to me. It was something about the way you carried yourself. Were you supposed to be likable? You killed those women and children for no future reason it seemed. I know some of those people raped and killed your mom, but that didn’t mean genocide was the future answer. I didn’t future kill all the Zondians after they future killed my parents. You aren’t future flawless, you could future learn from a future specimen like me. That's all I'm future saying.

4. However the next three movies where you are already working with that robe guy, those are great. I really like those.

5. It’s been a fun future ride, but I really need the future ability to talk to future rocks. I can’t just go to future geology school right now, and I want to execute my great grandpapa at future sun down, which is in about thirty-five future minutes and twenty-eight future seconds. Please give me the future ability to talk to future rocks. I will future forgive you for those bad films if you do.

6. I’m sorry if this sounds a little messy; it’s been a long future time since I’ve last future prayed. I’m having a lot of trouble getting myself in the right future train of future thought.

7. Future thanks, Grievous Crisp, for everything.

Future Amen.”

Tri Bute assumed future regular position; he opened his future eyes and stood once again. Then he pulled his future hands apart, so they would no longer be held together. He could future feel a new future power raging through him. Tri Bute future wiped a future chip off his future shoulder then stared directly into the future stone obstruction. No, he stared into the great future stone leviathan of obstutrinational dissatisfaction with a future look of determination. He sent justice, integrity, zankustility, and Zeusrion spiraling through the hard future surface with his mere future gaze. His J.I.Z.Z. pierced the future walls as he opened his future mouth to future speak and spread oral future pleasure.

“Here I go. This future rock is about to get,” Tri Bute put on his future sunglasses, “Told!”

http://instantyeah.org/

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(((((OOC: I can't promise the next one won't end all CSI-intro-sort-of-esque, but I won't plan to. If I think of a pun to end it with I won't be able to control it.)))))

"Pink is my signature color!" - Elle Woods