The following is a dream of Hunter Payne, sometime between yesterday and tomorrow. This means logic is thrown out the window, as well as copyright infringement, if anything you can call this parody of a dream Hunter Payne once had or will have. This is "A Payneful Day In Oz"... Part 4! The epic conclusion!







-We see Hunter about to leave the forest back into WWJOY's kingdom. Knowing her weakness is glitter, Hunter now has enough glitter to suffocate Lil' Richard, Prince, Elton John and any other gay musician you can think of. Hunter knows he can't kill WWJOY until he finds out where she put his friends. So the only thing he can do, is try to get on WWJOY's good side temporarily. As soon as he gets out of the forest he calls for the witch to arrive-




Payne: Wicked Witch of JOY!



-Sure enough, the clouds darken and WWJOY draws near on her broom. Though she doesn't have her pretties with her-




WWJOY: Awww Hunter! Have you came to join your friends? MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!



-Flirting is hard to do with a laugh like that! Yuck!-



Payne: Actually I came to say I'm sorry.



WWJOY: Really now?



Payne: Yes, and I really like what you've done to the place.



WWJOY: Really???



Payne: Yes, and what you've done to yourself. Green is a good color skin for you.



-Hunter tries not to throw up after saying that-



WWJOY: Oh stop! MUWAHAHAHAHAHA! Do you still think I'm hot?




-Intuition: FUCK NO!-



Payne: You look drop dead gorgous!



WWJOY: What do you like the most about me?



Payne: Tough, I can't decide between your green skin or those warts you're growing.



-Intuition: I'm going to be sick! BLAH!!!!



WWJOY: Awww, thanks!




Payne: Sooo I was thinking... that your kingdom kind of needs a King...



WWJOY: Yes it does! Why don't we go to my castle and crown you King? ;)



-Intuition: NOOOOOO!!!!!-



Payne: I'd love to!



-WWJOY gives Hunter the one finger "come here" signal your old grandma or teacher use to give you. After he goes, she bites her green lower lip-



WWJOY: How about a kiss before we go?



-Intuition: NOOOO!!! Don't kiss her! NO! NO! NO!-

MUAH!

-WWJOY shoves her tongue down Hunter's throat-



-Intuition: EWWWWW! TASTES LIKE PEE!-



-Payne and WWJOY begin the flight via broom to her castle-

---

-As they arrive, WWJOY hurries Hunter Payne up to her bedroom. Probably because she hasn't had any human dick in a while. Just headless winged aid monkey dick, as Kevin alluded to earlier. WWJOY throws Hunter on her stiff witch bed-



Payne: So where are my friends... and Jonah.



WWJOY: They are getting tortured in my dungeon silly.



-WWJOY jumps on Hunter and begins touching his face with her wrinkly green hands and kissing him, It's fucking gross!-



Payne: How?



WWJOY: I'm having my pretty Rainy read his-her poetry to them, then having my pretty Swifty read it back word for word!



Payne: That is fucking evil!



WWJOY: Well I am kind of a witch, so yeah...



Payne: Can I see them?



WWJOY: No we're kinda busy here!



Payne: Please?



WWJOY: Tell you what, we'll go see them after you fuck me!



-WWJOY grabs Hunter's flaccid dick through his pants. It's flaccid because an aids infested, wart-having, green witch is touching it-




WWJOY: Ummm, you better get it up! My pretties dicks are more enjoyable than that...


-Fucking gross!-


Payne: Gimmie a minute here...



-Hunter stands up and WWJOY turns around feeling unsatisfied. that's when Hunter reaches for some glitter that was in a baggy in his pocket and throws it at an unsuspecting WWJOY. She begins to melt immediately-




WWJOY: AHHHH!!! AHHHH!!!! I'M MELTING!!!!! I'M MELTING!!!! AHHHH!!!




-WWJOY melts to death and Hunter avoids that disaster of fucking her-




Payne: Whew, that was a close one!



-Wasting no time Hunter pulls out his glock that was hidden inside his overcoat. Hunter Payne leaves the room and goes bird-monkey hunting, killing every one of those ugly bastards in sight. Until he reached the dungeon. He opens the large wooden door into the torture room, he sees all 4 of WWJOY's main monkeys in the torture room and his friends tied up to the wall, so they can't cover their ears. Oh and Jonah is there too-




Rainy: IAM Rain, IAM Sun, IAM...



-How is he talking without a head? Remember logic is gone in Oz-



-Lenny spots Hunter and he shoots Lenny immediately-

BANG!



BANG!




BANG!




BANG!




BANG!

1...2...3...4...5 times! 4 of those were probably unnessacery but fuck it!




Caliy is next...

BANG!

But he gets shot down before he is even able to form an opinion as to why he got shot!




-Hunter goes to untie Kevin and Zach-



Payne: Do the honors Kev.



-Kevin dazed from all the torture gets the gun and points it and the annoyance and the copycat-




Rainy: IAM...



Swifty: IAM...



Kevin: Dead bitches!

PEEW!!!



PEEW!!!

-When Kevin shoots a gun it's "Peew Peew" because he's small-







Payne: It's over guys! Wicked witch of JOY is no more!



Jonah: Great, now can you get me down now?




Payne: In a minute!




Kevin: I knew you could do it Hunt! I don't even care how.




Payne: You don't want to know, trust me!




Kevin: "Alright! Alright! Alrighhhttt!" Now can I have my Nikes back?



Payne: Yeah sure.




-Hunter and Kevin swap shoes again... Oh and they eventually let Jonah down...... eventually...-




Payne: Oh Kev, the wonderful witch of KKK thinks we're a gay couple now...

---

-With WWJOY and all of her minions dead. The guys were back on the yellow brick road and almost at the of Oz's castle-






Payne: You think this guy can really help us?



Kevin: He'd better damn it!



Payne: And Jonah...



Jonah: Yeah?




Payne: Shut up and stay out of the way.




Jonah: Alright.




Kevin: Yeah, I want you to be quieter than Zach or I will fuck you up myself! Hunter, you know he was encouraging that monkey to read more poetry!



Payne: Wow! You gotta fuck him up when we are done here.




-They arrive at the castle front doorstep-

KNOCK!


KNOCK!


KNOCK!

-After a few moments the door's large peephole is opened by a man with a similar build and facial structure as Paul Heyman, but we assure you it is NOT Paul Heyman. Due to copyright infringement we can now say for sure that is NOT Paul Heyman-




NOT Paul Heyman: What do you want?!



Payne: That's how you greet guest?!



NOT Paul Heyman: I'm not here to welcome you! What do you want?



Payne: We want to see the of Oz.



NOT Paul Heyman: Hahaha, The of Oz doesn't waste his time with simpletons like you. Sorry.



Payne: Hey asshole! You don't know what we had to go through to get here! I almost fucked a dirty witch!


Kevin: Woah woah wait a minute! What now?!



Payne: I had to get in the castle!



Kevin: You know you probably have aids now right? Remind me not to share anything with you.



Payne: Damn it, I said almost! Now let us in!



NOT Paul Heyman: Hmmm NOPE!



-NOT Paul Heyman shuts the large peephole-




Payne: Motherfucker!

KNOCK!




KNOCK!



KNOCK!

-NOT Paul Heyman opens the large peephole again-





NOT Paul Heyman: You again?!




Payne: Alright, I didn't want to have to do this. Kev! Come here, and "paint this motherfucker muffin cap back blue!"




-Kevin steps up and pulls up his shirt to show the gun.








Kevin: Listen up doorman, you don't want this fucking problem! I'll make sure this door gets open one way or another nigga!




NOT Paul Heyman: Let me thin....




Kevin: "Shut up bitch! Alright! Alright! Alrighhhttt!"




Payne: Let us in or Kev will murder everybody in that bitch! Does this look like the face of a stable man?







NOT Paul Heyman: Alright!!! But make it quick!




-NOT Paul Heyman opens the large door and points the 4 men where they need to go. Straight down the hall. They open a few doors and a final huge door. They see a giant green head hologram with one eye! From first glance it appears to be XWF owner Shane . However despite the same last name doesn't mean anything. Ask John and Juan Madison. So we can confirm it is NOT XWF owner Shane -



of Oz: I AM THE GREAT OF OZ! WHAT DO YOU WANT?



Payne: Mr. ... of Oz. I need to go back home! I don't belong here!



of Oz: WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF YOU?



Kevin: Yeah, I want my Hart back damn it! It is missing on my birth certificate and I want it back!



-After a few moments of Jonah's scared silence-



of Oz: WHAT ABOUT YOU?!



-Jonah still not having courage whispers-



Jonah: -whispers- I'd like courage sir.



of Oz: WHAT?!



Payne: He said courage! And our braindead friend Zach, wants a brain.



of Oz: VERY WELL. I WILL MAKE A NOTE OF ALL YOUR DISCREPANCIES AND HAVE SOMEONE GET BACK TO YOU WITHIN 2 YEARS. NOW BE GONE!



Payne: Well uhh... FUCK THAT!



of Oz: I SAID, BE GONE!



-Suddenly the ground starts shaking and heavy wind starts blowing knocking all 4 guys down. Every man trying to reach his feet, but they can't without immediately falling again. Zach trying to get up grabs ahold of the wall on the side... but falls again... this time he grabs a curtain of some sort and pulls himself up, then his weight gets the best of him and the curtain breaks off and he falls on his ass again... Huh? There is a guy working a control panel behind the curtain Zach just pulled down. What a shocker right? -




Payne: Who are you?!



of Oz: I AM THE GREattt...



-The man realizes his curtain is gone-



of Oz: Well this is awkward...



-Hunter, Kevin, and Jonah run over to the impostor-



Payne: What the fuck dude?!



-Upon closer inspection we see the impostor looks a lot like somebody from the XWF Administrative Network. It is too unsure to say at this point. So we'll just stay on the safe copyright infringement side and say it is not anybody from the XWF Administrative Network-



Payne: Who are you?!



NOT Admin: The great mind behind The Great of Oz! Until you caught me! Listen, I don't anyone to find out about this. So I'll make a deal with you. I'll solve your problems and you never say a word of this. Deal?




Payne: Deal!



NOT Admin: Well first let me say, you don't need me to answer your problems. You can solve it yourself. Look what would you tell Kevin about him not having his Hart?



Payne: I would tell him that a piece of paper doesn't mean anything and if he feels like a Hart then he is.



-Kevin starts tearing up and hugs Hunter in a very NOT gay moment-



NOT Admin: Now Jonah and his courage.



Payne: That courage isn't something found in some potion. It's just standing up for what you believe in and standing up for yourself.



Jonah: You're right Hunter! Kevin I've had enough of you ridiculing me and you're going to stop now!

SMACK!

Kevin: "Who the FUCK you think you talking to?!"



-Kevin just smacked the shit out of Jonah. Real talk... Damn!-



Payne: Hahahaha!



-NOT Admin completely ignores what just happened and continues talking-




NOT Admin: And Zach?




Payne: Zach?.... Zach.... Hmmm, yeah, I need some help with that one.



NOT Admin: Alright forget what I said earlier, you're 0-3. Remember Hunter, the simplest answer is typically the right one. Kevin's issue is simple. The reason he doesn't have his Hart is because if you used his full name that is copyright infringement and you could be sued. Jonah doesn't have courage simply because he makes too much money annually. Once you make a certain amount of money, you don't need courage anymore. You just throw money at problems till they go away. As for Zach... Well he just overdosed. Brain damage happens when you do as many drugs as Zach has.




Payne: And me?




NOT Admin: You? Well all you have to do is wake up...



Payne: What?

WAKE UP!!!

---

Payne: I'm up!



-Hunter Payne wakes up in the passenger seat of Kevin's Escalade-



Kevin: You alright Hunt?



Payne: Where am I?




Kevin: With your boy Kev! Are you okay?



Payne: I guess Kev, man I just had the craziest dream!



Kevin: I can tell. You kept yelling out "Copyright infringement" over and over again.




Payne: It was like the Wizard of Oz, and you were there.



Zach: Was I there?



-Hunter just noticed Zach and Jonah were in the backseat-



Payne: Yes, both of you were! It was crazy!



Kevin: So if it was the Wizard of Oz, Who was I?



Payne: You didn't have a Hart,but not the organ, your last name. Jonah didn't have courage, and Zach didn't have a brain.



Jonah: Haha, that makes you Dorthy!



Payne: I guess it does...



-The 4 part series ends with Hunter Payne glad it was all just a dream-

THE END!