The scene opens as Crimson Deadly is seen creeping backstage when a commosion is heard developing not far away. Crimson's attention is averted and he begins sprinting towards it. Stopping and gasping for air as Sebastian Duke kicks out of a pinning attempt by Jacob Ortiz.pin...........................................pin......................................pin

Crimson Deadly: "What in flippin hell is happining here guys? You aren't even in the ring and you're here, practically humping backstage."
pin
Seb spins around and looks at the camera that is taping the scene, realizing the creepiness of the way they looked. He promptly falls to his knees and puts his palms together as though he's ready to worsnip.
pin
Sebastian Duke: Please, don't manipulate the situation, I kicked out of a pin attempt so I can continue keeping this belt.
pin
Crimson Deadly begins tapping his jaw in thought. Wondering what Sebastian meant.
pin
Crimson Deadly: Tell me, what belt is this that binds you to kick out in some random pin?

Sebastian Duke: The FTW UFO E1999 Champinsnip... Anytime someone pins me or says anything with the letters p.i.n next to each other, I have to kick out.

Crimson Deadly's expression changes into surprise as his eyes are now gaping opin.

Crimson Deadly: Reaaally? Well fancy bumping into you, you know, in my opinion, you're a spineless individual which shows you never ate your spinach like popeye. I was actually hoping you had just a pinch of balls within your attitude.

You can almost see the happiness fade and the grumpiness decend over Sebastian's aura as his eyes becomes rather gripping towards his target, his face turning into a beet-red colour. Sebastian Duke runs towards Crimson Deadly.

However, Crimson Deadly ducks a clothespine attempt and, prepping himself, he lifts up the giant man by his triceps, holding him in the air before throwing him up in the air, wrapping his arms around Duke's neck and doing a sitting down maneuver, causing Sebastian's spine to become strewn over his shoulder.

Crimson Deadly: "There is one that has a head without an eye,
And there's one that has an eye without a head.
You may find the answer if you try;
And when all is said,
Half the answer hangs upon a thread.
pin
If you get the full answer, you'll know what I do next."
pin
....................

I'm not sure but I think it's fairplay to say you have to give the full answer to negate it lol otherwise you're just reaping me of a good chance.

:Lesnar: Somebody doesn't pay attention-

Sebastian and Crimson both glance over to where that voice came from; the voice of THE 24/7 FTW UFO E1999 Champion himself.

:Lesnar: I love the fact that Crimson Deadly accused two other men of humping backstage when if he had been paying any attention at all instead of fantasizing about men humping, he'd know who the true champion is around here.

*!*crack*!* Brock Lesnar had a metal baseball bat hidden behind his back the entire time! He just sent Crimson's own crimson blood spurting out of his FACE and all over Duke's broken body.

:Lesnar: And I just adore how Duke here was still too dazed and battered after my assault on him to even inform Crimson that he doesn't hold this any longer- producing the 24/7 belt by unhooking it from around his own waist.

Duke's glazed over eyes can barely focus on the belt as Brock dangles it in front of his face, but then-































smashes it into the face of the oblivious, ignorant, slightly homosexual looking Crimson Dong wannabe; further opening up the already gaping wound on Crimson's face! Crimson Deadly smashes back into the wall behind him from the force of that shot and gently slides down into a crumpled mess like a slinky -- a bloody slinky, and we all know how nasty those are, right?

RIGHT?

:Lesnar: I'll give you a big hint as to who you should have been trying to pin, and why everything you just tried is completely useless and pointless now.

He's doing it! Brock easily plucks Crimson Deadly up from the ground like a fresh daisy and throws him up into the air, catching him across his shoulders. Sebastian Duke starts trying to get up -- but instead all we see is the F-5 that sends Crimson Deadly's bloody body down into Sebastian Duke's fragile, broken shell.

Brock picks his title back up, spits on Crimson Deadly and Sebastian Duke, and then forgets to laugh. If only these men knew how to put up a real fight this might have actually been amusing. Instead? It was simply pathetic and a waste of the champ's time. No kickout even necessary here; that's all, folks.

Brock Lesnar says all these things and conducts this assault as he's in the process of being pinned. He never really kicks out but it's really quite impressive.

Regardless, Crimson Deadly while being ravaged remains on Lesnar long enough for NKWC to count.

1...

2...

THREE!

NEW CHAMPION: CRIMSON COBRA

Lesnar gets off the mat...

And NKWC drills him with a steel folding chair.

Where did he get it?

Stop asking questions.

NKWC then puts the chair back on the ground.

And waits for more pin attempts.

Administrator still is eating his banana and wonders how there are multiple versions of the same people doing different things at the same time...

Which ones are the fakes, and which ones are real?

There's only ONE fair outcome to THIS! HAHAHA!

Administrator tells NKWC that he must do thirty push ups, but NKWC refuses. Administrator finishes up his banana and does sixty push ups as NKWC looks on, not showing if he's impressed or not!

Admin: Each of those pushups counted as a pin on every champion in the world. I now am every champion...

NKWC disagrees, but knows Admin can fire him on the spot!

Admin: I'll tell you what, you lap dog for Shane ... how about I just name myself the champion and then I let a non-living object pin me for it in a couple of hours to see who gets first dibs on that random object? Remember how in the past we've had actual photos of singers, and actual FOOD as champion?

NKWC does not remember this. He was busy committing war crimes back in those days.

Admin: Too bad! What I say goes, and even Shane can't do a thing about it. HA!

New Champion: ADMINISTRATOR

NKWC finds this acceptable.

And is sure nothing bad will come of the parallel reality we opened that had simultaneous title changes to the same champion whose fate we just altered.

Slowly veering the passage of time away from the natural order.

Towards the chaos and insanity that only free will can allow.

NKWC sighs fondly.

Good.

TImes.

ADMIN: Are you SURE you won't do a pushup for me? Just one?

That would have been cool I was almost awarded the championship for all of Crimson Deadly's work!

_______________________________________________________

Twitter Trends Related to @TheCrimsonSnake:
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Did someone say "award the championship"?

NKWC bashes Administrator across the skull with his trusty steel folding chair.

As he bleeds from the back of the head, NKWC throws Crimson Cobra onto him
and fast counts 123!

NKWC stands over the fallen Admin.

"Chairman Shane salutes you, sir."

NEW CHAMPION: CRIMSON COBRA!

Wait?

You didn't?

No?

You sure?

Well...

It's too late now.