From

Cam Lang

Archie Lawson

Peter Gilmour

Chris Macbeth

and the rest of the XWF:

Never forget!

Five thousand fans are packed in the War Room. What was once abandoned storage facility continues to undergo renovations under the direction of Giovanni Ferrari. The fans are drunk and disorderly tonight as they get ready for two hours of exciting action.


Upon entering the War Room, we notice that this isn't your typical wrestling venue. The venue setup resembles something you'd see out of a film that depicts a post-apocalyptic city. The grunge-like, gritty makeup of the facility gives off a rebellious undertone. The barriers that separate the audience from the ring are random pieces of scrap metal that have been welded together. The pounding sound of metal fills the room from the demanding, bloodthirsty fans who pound the barriers with the bottom of their fists.


The always popular "Winner Ride" (a chute that takes weaker members of the roster on a ride to Mexico) remains in place, eager to swallow its first victim of the night.


Above the entrance tunnel of the stage is a sky box that holds General Manager Giovanni Ferrari and Assistant General Manager John Madison. They also happen to be the commentary team of Warfare.


We go to them now as they go into their routine of breaking down the show.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Welcome back to the War Room, fans. We're live for another episode of XWF Wednesday Warfare! And tonight could very well be a historic one, right Johnny?"


John Madison: "Historic? Wait, do I have a match tonight?"


Giovanni Ferrari: "Hah, that's funny. No, your King Match isn't until next week, buddy. You can relax. However, your friend Eli James IV DOES have a title to defend tonight and its against Alexandra Callaway. Could this be the night where he finally loses that US Title?"


John Madison: "Are you nuts, Gio? No, that's not happening. Don't even talk about that happening. Look, Eli has some tricks and surprises planned for tonight so you can forget the title change scenario."


Giovanni Ferrari: "Hmm tricks? Like maybe having members of The Congregation interfering in the match?"


John Madison: "I don't know, Gio. He said it would be a SURPRISE."


Giovanni Ferrari: "Calm down, John. I'm just asking what you think he might have planned."


John Madison: "Well, if there is outside interference then Alexandra Callaway should be ready for it anyway. She's had weeks to study Eli James' ring work. If she can't handle a little bit of outside involvement then she can take her pretty little ass back in the kitchen!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "Oh come on! I suppose you think she should make you a sandwich while she's in there too, right?"


John Madison: "I'm more of a breakfast kind of guy, Gio. Tell Callaway I like my eggs cooked over easy."


Giovanni Ferrari: "What about pancakes? You Americans love pancakes..."


John Madison: "Are you fucking kidding me? Do I look like Peter Gilmour to you? I don't eat that trash, Gio!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "Well, like Peter says, we must digress. Tonight we also have an X-Treme Title match. Who do you think is winning that one, John?"


John Madison: "I've got my money on who-fuckin'-cares. That match should be a one on one contest between Mystica and Angelus, that's all there is to it. It's a damn shame I have to watch these five other random fuck heads disgrace my ring."


Giovanni Ferrari: "Boy, John... you are grouchy tonight. Did you forget to take your... Midol, perhaps?"


John Madison: "Fuck off, Gio. Let's just get this first match over with. Bring out the turban guy, the roid rage guy, and the gothic zombie bitch. "





As SVD stands in the ring, awaiting his opponents.

The entire arena goes dark. Up on the screen a heartbeat monitor is shown slowly beating. It then suddenly flatlines and "I Stand Alone" begins playing. A dark silhoutte appears at the top of the ramp. An explosion of pyro goes off and the lights suddenly flash on revealing Bigg E.

"Arma-Goddamn-Motherf**kin-Geddon" by Marilyn Manson begins to play and a figure steps out onto the top of the ramp. It's Zak Misery. He saunters to the ring and slips inside.

Once the competitors are in the ring the two of them make quick work of SVD, sending him flying out of the ring and onto the barricade. The referee checks on him and calls for the EMTS. It is decided at that point that SVD is not able to compete in this match. Bigg E and Zak turn and look at each other when Zak goes in for the attack, trying to take Bigg E down with a clothesline. It doesn't work, and he bounces off. Bigg E hits Zak with a Superplex and Zak writhes for a few moments before rolling out of the ring to collect himself. Once he has the referee starts the 10 count.

Zak breaks it and rolls back into the ring where he goes on the attack, punching at Bigg E and finally getting the big man to one knee. Zak manages to hit a few big moves and take the big man down rather quickly. Zak hits finisher Poveglia Death, and quickly pins him.

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3....

WINNER(S): Zak Misery

Our cameras cut back to the ring, where we see both John Black and Matt Ward already standing. Two members of the quickly degenerating stable known as the Angels of Death, having to duke it out in a match tonight. They step to the center of the ring, and shake hands before the referee orders the bell be rung. Right out of the gate, Ward leaps at Black and hits him with a series of punches that knock him into the corner.


Black kicks Ward in the shin, and the two engage in a brawl that ends with the two falling over the ropes. Ward gets to his feet, and lays into Black with punches and kicks to the face and ribs, respectively. He goes for a big elbow drop, but misses as Black rolls out of the way.


Hopping to his feet as soon as Ward gets back to his, Black goes on the attack. He hits multiple chops on the man, and slams his head into the barricade as the two make their way up the ramp. Ward elbows the man in the stomach and whips him into the barricade. On the rebound, Ward gets the upper hand throughout most of the fight up to the stage. Once they make it to the stage, Black ducks a punch from Ward, and kicks him in the gonads! On the stage, near the bike, he sees a lasso! Oh shit!


Taking the rope, he proceeds to hogtie Ward, and he loads him up into the oft forgotten bitchcar. Slapping the driver of the bike on the back, the man drives out of the arena, leaving Black on the stage to celebrate his victory.

WINNER(S): John Black

The flags hang from poles on opposite sides of the ring as David "Shadows" and Jack Kronus prepare for battle.


The bell rings and the two men shoot for a take down. Mosier overpowers Kronus in the exchange and tackles him to the mat. Mosier lays into Kronus with lefts and rights.


Mosier throws Kronus into the ropes and takes him down with a back body drop. Mosier then gives Kronus a leg drop. Mosier walks over to the corner that contains the United States flag and climbs up to fetch it.


Mosier gets his hand on the flag, but Kronus catches him with a punch to the back. Kronus takes Mosier off the top rope with a back suplex. He then applies a side headlock. Mosier powers out of the headlock by throwing Kronus behind him for a back suplex, but Kronus lands on his feet. Kronus then nails Mosier with a neckbreaker.


Kronus walks over to claim the union jack. He gets a hand on the flag as well before Mosier pulls him off the top rope with a power bomb. Mosier drops an elbow over the chest of Kronus. Mosier picks up Kronus and lock on an arm wrench. Mosier tries to pull Kronus into Shadow Stunner, but Kronus pushes Mosier away before he can hit it. Mosier ducks an incoming lariat from Kronus, boots him in the stomach, and gives him a piledriver!


Mosier goes for the flag for a second time. He's able to get his hands on it, but is having difficulty unlatching the clip from the d-ring. He manages to get one flip undone, but is attacked from behind before he can undo the second one.


Kronus stands on the top rope with Mosier, punching him next to the American flag. Kronus then takes Mosier off the top rope with the Ignition (Edgecution)!


Kronus walks over to the union jack corner, and removes the clips that hold it to the pole. With the union jack in hand, Kronus plants his feet on the mat and wins the match.

WINNER(S): Jack Kronus

Superstar of the Month

Giovanni Ferrari stands in the ring holding a crystal trophy while he speaks into a microphone.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Ladies and gentlemen, it is an honor to present to you the Superstar of the Month for the month of August. This XWF superstar worked hard. He competed in the War Games main event, defeated El Rey, was runner up in the X-Treme Title main event, and held the Tag Team Titles. But more importantly than all of that, he earned the respect and the votes of the millions of XWF fans across the world. Ladies and gentlemen: MYSTICA!"


First eight chords of Sick, Sick, Sick ring out as a pale blue mist leaks from the floor. Mystica walks in slowly, draped in a flowing white robe, which he discards after he passes through the mist. He glares down at the ring, gives a slight smirk, and presses his hands together in prayer. After bowing his head for a moment, he walks calmly down to the ring and slides in under the bottom rope.


Mystica walks up to Giovanni Ferrari and accepts his award. He nods his head and is about to walk away when Gio speaks into the microphone.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Mystica. You can do better than The Congregation. Come now a bunch of overly religious hicks sitting in the mud and telling fairy tales. You're better than superstition. You're Mystica and you used to be a prophet with your own esteem and respect. Remember that? You shouldn't follow Mystica. You should lead. You should be the man who calls the shots. That's why I'm giving you.....a shot at the title. Mystica vs the winner of tonight's main event....what do you say?"


Mystica pauses after putting one leg through the ropes. He takes a minute to take in Gio's offer, but then continues to leave the ring.


Giovanni Ferrari: "The offer is in place whenever you're ready, superstar of the month."


Mystica keeps his gazed pointed to the entrance curtain and walks away with no response to Giovanni's offer.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Let's hear it for Mystica-- Superstar of the Month!"


The crowd cheers as Mystica silently leaves the stage.





From Florence, Alabama....it's Joseph Kain!




From Cincinnati, Ohio....it's Jonny Rebel!



Coming at you from XWF City......he is your guest referee for tonight's engagement. Give it up for - DAT BOY W/DAT BIG OL' DICK! MR. XWF!!!!!



Jonny Rebel and Joseph Kain stand in the ring, awaiting the bell to sound so their match can begin as Mr. XWF climbs into the ring, sporting a very patriotic red, white and blue jumpsuit. His silver helmet also appears to be extra shiny today. It looks as though he shined it up, or added extra glitter to it, or something. Whatever he did it is extra bright and shiny. In fact, some people are blinded momentarily when the lights hit the helmet a certain way. This is Warfare though and those are just the fans....who cares about those.....right?


Mr. XWF takes his time and walks up in between Jonny Rebel and Joseph Kain, pulling a microphone from God knows where, cause that spandex suit surely doesn't have pockets and he wasn't seen carrying a microphone a minute ago. Anyway Mr. XWF pulls a mic out and steps between the two men.


Mr. Xwf: NOW I KNOW YOU TWO WANT TO TEAR INTO EACH OTHER LIKE I TEAR INTO ROSE SMITH'S DIRTY ASS SKANK HOLE.....ALL DAY.....EVERY AND I MEAN EEEVVVVEERRRYYYY DAMN DAY! BUT ADMIRAL APPENDAGE NEEDS YOU ALL TO UNDERSTAND SOMETHING.


Mr. Xwf pauses and rests his hands on Kain's and Rebel's shoulders before he speaks again. This is clearly something very important Mr. XWF is about to say...or scream rather. This guy really has a hard time speaking at a normal level.


Mr. Xwf: YOU WILL RESPECT MY COCK AND DO AS IT SCREAMS AT ALL TIMES!


What the fuck? Kain and Rebel exchange glances before Rebel decides to interrupt.


Jonny Rebel: You want us to listen to your cock?


Mr. Xwf: looks as appalled and taken aback as a man wearing a shiny dome on his head could look. He also helps us know that by acting out such emotions in a very exaggerated and obnoxious way as he also brings the mic up to respond.


Mr. Xwf: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST ASK?????? WAS THAT EVEN A SERIOUS QUESTION???? HOW CAN'T YOU HEAR IT???? IT'S SCREAMING LIKE A BANSHEE RIGHT FUCKING NOW AND DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT IT'S SCREAMING??


Jonny Rebel: What?


Mr. Xwf shakes his head and gets right up in Jonny Rebel's face.


Mr. Xwf: IT'S SCREAMING START THIS FUCKING MATCH
BIZZZZAAATTCCCHHH!!!!!!


Oh my god! Mr. XWF headbutts Rebel at the end of that sentence he screamed! Then Mr. XWF walks to the side like nothing happened! What an asshole! Jonny Rebel's nose is bleeding like a stuck pig as the bell sounds and this match begins. Someone get that man a tissue, or a towel, or something. Geez.....what a way to start a match!


Joseph Kain does not show signs of sympathy for Jonny Rebel either as Kain sticks Rebel with a mean left hook followed by some knee shots to the ribs! However Rebel retaliates with a few stiff right jabs to Kain's face and some chops to Kain's chest. Each chop louder and more excruciating then the last!


That's when Kain shoots back with an Elbow Smash and a Roundhouse Kick. While Rebel is dazed Kain then grabs Rebel by the shoulder and flings him across the ring. Rebel crashes into the ropes and bounces off them right into a Clothesline from Kain that nearly takes Rebel's head off!!


Rebel slams into the canvas and Kain slides from the ring. From there Kain begins to search under the ring for a weapon. Digging and pawing around under the ring Kain appears to be very selective when choosing and takes his time. Finally pulling out a tire iron and a baseball bat. Kain is double fisting weapons!


Kain then rolls into the ring and walks over to Rebel who's still laying on the canvas. Kain rears back and takes a swing with the tire iron just as Rebel rises up.


BAM!


Shot to Rebel's head from the tire iron and Rebel goes down. Then comes a shot from the baseball bat. Then a shot from the tire iron. Then the bat. Then the tire iron. This just keeps repeating, back and forth. Over and over as the fans cringe and gasp, at this brutality! Then just as the universal wonder if this act will ever stop is had...Kain tosses both the bat and the tire iron at Jonny Rebel and takes off towards the ropes.


Kain ascends the rope and leaps into a Frog Splash!


Joseph Kain covers for the pin!


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Kickout by Jonny Rebel!


Oh my god! Rebel kicked out! It's unbelievable! With the amount of destruction his body went through!! Yet he did it and he manages to shove Kain off of himself as well. Rebel pulls himself up and shakes his head to regain his bearings. Blood pours from his nose and runs all down his chest. Bruises and welts decorate, his face and body. This man looks like the embodiment of hell! Yet he's still standing and still has the drive to fight!


Joseph Kain charges towards Jonny Rebel and Rebel moves away, just in time. Kain soars past and crashes into the ropes. Working as a spring again, the ropes send Kain flying back and right into an Atomic Drop! Rebel follows this up with some wild stomps and then hits Kain with a Leg Drop!


Rebel heads off to the ropes, climbs them and prepares to launch himself off them, when Mr. XWF leans into the ropes, causing them to shift and Rebel loses his balance. Mr. XWF was leaning on the ropes as he looked like he was checking the bottom of his shoe for something. Whatever it was, must have been very distracting and really caught his attention. Mr. Xwf doesn't even appear to notice he messed up what Rebel was trying to accomplish. Rebel falls and his feet get tangled in the ropes! As Rebel squirms and tries to free himself, Kain starts to get up. He climbs to his feet and sees Rebel caught up, and immediately dives into action. He runs at full speed straight at Rebel and catches him with, a Corkscrew Backbreaker!


Rebel hits the canvas and Kain yanks him, back to his feet. Kain prepares to deliver a Suplex, but Rebel manages to get out of it and then proceeds to deliver a Powerbomb! With Kain down Rebel runs off to the ropes and climbs them again. Once atop the ropes Rebel feels them shift again and sees Mr. Xwf, now resting against them as he lounges, with his hands placed behind his head. However, Rebel was ready for it this time and was able to catch himself and not fall.


Rebel shoots a stern look to Mr. Xwf, who just shrugs and acts like he's totally innocent. Yes, cause the ref usually will lounge against the ropes, while someone attempts to do a move....nice try Mr. Xwf. Jonny Rebel shakes his head and finally takes to the air in a brilliantly delivered, Shooting Star Press! Jonny Rebel covers for the pin!


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Three!!!

WINNER(S): Jonny Rebel

Mr. Xwf walks over and raises Jonny Rebel's hand high in the air, in celebration of Jonny's victory. Then out of nowhere, Mr. Xwf spins Rebel around and hits him with the...


ROCK BOTTOM!
ROCK BOTTOM!
ROCK BOTTOM!


Oh sweet Jesus on a sugar free vanilla wafer....Mr. Xwf hit Jonny Rebel with the ROCK BOTTOM!


From there Mr. XWF proceeds to stick his ass right over Rebel's face and fart. The fart is so loud and so wet sounding...Mr. XWF had to have been shitting in his pants. There's no way that man didn't! It's simply not possible.The smell is also so potent that it instantly sends Rebel into a fit of vomiting and convulsing as Mr. Xwf stands up and walks proudly, out of the ring. Saluting the audience as he makes his way up the ramp.




The bell rings and Jessie Diaz locks up with Christine Nash, Jessie knocks Christine into the mud and Christine tries to fight back up to her feet. She makes it to her feet and the two women circle each other. Christine tries to clothesline Jessie and Jessie ducks, shoving Christine from behind, tossing her face first into the mud. Christine turns around and "Requiem" by Avenged Sevenfold began to play. She turns back to the ramp and looks around for Alexandra.

"DONT YOU DARE MESS THIS UP FOR ME!"

Christine screams loudly. Alexandra makes her way out of the crowd, she climbs over the barricade and sits down on it, looking at Christine with a smirk. About that time Jonny Rebels music begins to play and he walks out onto the ramp and over towards Jessie's side.

"Jessie.. let me help."

"Fuck off. I don't need any help to win."

Jessie turned back around and walks up behind Christine and puts her in a submission move. Christine tries to get out of it, but Jessie's too strong. Christine taps out, and starts sinking into the mud.

The referee tells her to break the hold that she has been named the winner. Jessie shoves Christine's head under the mud, holding it there. The referee calls for help and they pull Jessie off of Christine and try to revive Christine

WINNER(S): Jessie Diaz

An eX-Treme Reward

Giovanni Ferrari takes the center of the ring once again. This time he's holding a packet of papers, most likely a contract of some kind.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Ladies and gentlemen, we have another award to give out tonight, more or less. Our current X-Treme Champion, Angelus, has held the X-treme Title for OVER two weeks. Therefor, he is entitled to a shot at either the United States or Tag Team Titles at a date of his choosing. Angelus, come on out and accept your reward!"


The lights in the arena go out as blue lighting filters through the darkness. The opening guitar wail to "This Fire" kicks up. Up on the X-Tron flashes Angelus' logo -- a tapped fist with bloody knuckles. Angelus is left standing in the middle of the stage staring straight down at his opponent.


There's a sudden chill that sweeps through the crowd as Angelus takes one good, long, look around the arena. He makes his way down the ramp walking backward as he extends his arms while looking up to the ceiling.


Angelus slides in on the apron and pops up, immediately looks over to his opponent. He then turns around and runs to the turnbuckle, jumping up to the top rope and extending his arms wide as he yells to the crowd, then points to them and back to himself.


Giovanni shakes Angelus' hand before giving him the title shot contract.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Congratulations, Angelus. You've earned this. You now own a 24/7 briefcase AND a title shot for any time of your choosing."


Angelus nods his head in confidence as he looks down at the 24/7 briefcase in one hand and the contract in the other.


Angelus: "I'm glad you brought me out here, Gio, because I actually have something to say about these title shots. I want to use this title shot contract to set a date for a shot at the United States Title! I don't care if it's Callaway or James, I want a shot at the United States Title on Sep--"


All of a sudden...

EXTREME REVOLUTION

Appears over the X-Tron, interrupting Angelus mid-sentence.


LJ Havok, Troy Turner, and Jason E Smith walk towards the ring with Angelus' full attention.


Suddenly, someone from the audience runs into the ring and attacks Angelus from behind with a lead pipe! What the hell!


The man removes the hood of his hoodie and it turns out to be CAM LANG!


With Angelus down, the remainder of Extreme Revolution rush into the ring and begin to beat down Angelus. ER hold Angelus down on his knees as Cam Lang readies the lead pipe. Angelus tries to break free but the three men are too strong. Cam Lang takes the lead pipe and bashes Angelus over the head with it!


Giovanni Ferrari is finally able to summon a security team but it's far too late. The security team escorts LJ Havok and Troy Turner from ringside as Cam Lang and Jason E Smith remain in the ring for the next match. A close up of Angelus shows a nasty cut running from the top of his forehead into his scalp.




The opening bell sounds as all six men and women go into battle! The start of the match can be best described as an all out free for all. Superstars are punching each other wildly non-stop. The Smith-Lang alliance comes into play in the early going as they take Angelus out of the ring and work on him with some kicks and punches.


Angelus throws a kick at Lang, but Lang catches Angelus' leg and rolls him with a dragon whip. Smith then picks up Angelus and throws him away with a belly to belly suplex. Smith and Lang of Extreme Revolution take turns stomping away at Angelus. Angelus tries to escape ER by punching Lang in the nuts and throwing a kick to the head of Smith. Angelus then picks up Smith for a Sudden Death (GTS), but Lang runs up behind Angelus and strikes him in the back. Angelus drops Smith on his feet, and Smith takes out Angelus with an uppercut.


Smith goes under the ring and picks out a table. He sets it up and then drops Angelus on top of it with a Samoan drop. Cam Lang follows up immediately after with an elbow drop off the top rope, onto Angelus, and through the table!


Lang and Smith shove Angelus into the ring and pin him at the same time!


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3!



Giovanni Ferrari: "Lang and Smith have just eliminated the X-Treme Champion! Or, former X-Treme Champion I should say. I wonder if that attack from earlier had anything to do with it..."


John Madison: "Pfff. 24/7 rules, Gio. Angelus should be prepared for that kind of stuff!"


Back in the ring, Christine Nash drops Paradoxica with the Angel's Wings! She pins him.


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3!


Paradoxica is now eliminated along with Angelus.


Giovanni Ferrari: "We're just over five minutes into this match and we're down to the final four. Cam Lang, Jason E Smith, Smoke Man, and Christine Nash."


Nash and Smith trade punches in the center of the ring. Smith scoops Nash onto his shoulders but Nash pounds her elbow into his face. She then takes him down with a single knee face breaker. Nash walks out of the ring to retrieve a steel chair. She takes the chair and smacks Smith over his back with it. Nash lays the chair down and goes to give Smith a tornado DDT on top of it, but Smith reverses into a spinebuster. Smith pins Nash.


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Kick out!


With the steel chair in hand, Smith charges after Nash, but Nash drop kicks the chair into Smith's face! The kick doesn't put Smith down but causes him to stumble around. Nash rolls him up and places her feet on the ropes for leverage!


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3!


Smith is eliminated!


We're now down to Christine Nash, Smoke Man, and Cam Lang. One of these three participants will walk out with the X-Treme Title!


Nash and Smoke work together to take down Lang. They both rain down on him with punches. Lang ducks and tries to punch back but is overwhelmed. Smoke and Nash jump into the air at the same time and knock Lang down with a set of drop kicks to the face! They follow up with another double team move; Nash hits a double leg drop to the stomach and Smoke lands a fist drop. Nash pins Lang while Smoke pushes down on her for added leverage.


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Kick out!


Nash picks up Lang for an attempt at an Angelus Wings. She lifts Lang up, but Lang blocks the move, and throws Nash over with a back body drop. Smoke runs after Lang for a move, but Lang catches him with a side effect. Nash is back up at this point, but Lang takes her back down with an enzuiguri. Lang wraps his arms around Smoke's waist, lifts him up from the ring floor, and throws him through the air with a spin-out powerbomb. Lang keeps Smoke rolled up as the referee goes to count.


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Kick out!


Lang steps over Smoke and is about to go for his standing moonsault when Nash comes up from behind and smacks him in the back with a steel chair. The attack doesn't knock Lang down, just pushes him forward a couple of steps. Nash jumps onto his back and applies a choke hold. Lang throws her over in order to break free. Lang picks up the chair that Nash used on him and rams it into her stomach. Lang sets the chair down and gives Nash a sit out powerbomb onto the chair for the pin.


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3!


Christine Nash has been eliminated. We're down to Smoke Man and Cam Lang!


Smoke Man grabbed a steel chair while Lang was working over Nash. He smacks Lang in the back with the chair! Lang turns around to face his attacker, and Smoke bashes him over the head with that same steel chair. Smoke then leg drops the chair onto the face of Lang. Smoke pins Lang.


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Kick out!


Smoke pulls Lang up to his feet using a headlock. Smoke throws Lang into the corner. He runs after Lang for an attack but Lang kicks his feet up and catches Smoke in the teeth with his boot. Lang switches places with Smoke, back him into the corner. Lang climbs up to the top rope with Smoke. Once both men are on the top rope, Lang wraps his arm around Smoke's neck, and pulls him off the top rope for a super plex onto the steel chair! Lang rolls over onto Smoke for the pin.


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Kick out!


Lang rolls Smoke onto his feet and hits him with a Disaster Kick. Lang covers Smoke.


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Kick out!


Lang climbs to the top rope. He tries to land the 450 splash, but Smoke moves out of the way just in time.


Smoke runs at Lang for a high knee, but Lang catches him with a forearm strike. Lang goes for another Disaster Kick but Smoke counters with a standing drop kick!


Smoke goes for a choke slam on Lang, but Lang reverses into a small package.


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Kick out.


Lang runs after Smoke, Smoke catches him with a high knee. Smoke goes for the Smokescreen Armbar, but Lang slips away and delivers a back stabber to Smoke. Lang goes to the top rope again to attempt a 450 splash. Smoke pulls himself up to his feet before Lang can even balance himself on the top rope. Smoke pushes Lang's knees out from under him, causing Lang to fall groin-first onto the top turnbuckle. Smoke climbs up to the second rope, puts his hand around Lang's throat, and takes him off the top rope with a choke slam! Smoke hooks the leg.


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3!


Giovanni Ferrari: "Smoke wins it!"


John Madison: "Wow."


Giovanni Ferrari: "Smoke Man is less than a month into his career with XWF and has already won the X-Treme Title. Congratulations, Smoke!"

WINNER(S): And new X-Treme Champion, Smoke Man

Giovanni Ferrari: "Ladies and gentlemen, our main event is next and it's sure to be a classic! For one, it's the first ever Last Man OR Woman Standing Match in the history of professional wrestling. What do you think, John?"


John Madison: "As long as The Congregation falls under The Black Circle's umbrella, I believe anything that the members put on is worthy of being classic."


Giovanni Ferrari: "Speaking of which, I took the liberty of barring The Congregation and The Black Circle from ringside, John!"


John Madison: "Are you kidding me? Why wasn't I informed of this decision? I'm your co-GM!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "What are you talking about, John? I just did inform you! Do you disagree with the decision?"


John Madison: "Well n-"


Giovanni Ferrari: "Hold that thought, John! The bell just rang"




The match begins and Eli is the aggressor to start things off. This is the most logical approach for Eli seeing as how he has a distinct size advantage over Callaway. He grabs her by the shoulders with both hands and forces her into the corner and begins choking her with both hands. Although a blatant choke hold would be illegal in a standard match, those rules do not apply in a Last Man/woman Standing match. The referee is powerless in this situation as Eli continues to choke Callaway until she falls down to one knee.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Could this be the shortest Last Man/Woman Standing Match of all time? That would be two historical milestones in one night!"


John Madison: "This just goes to show how fragile these women are. Look at Callaway, she can't even break a simple choke hold! This reminds me of a scene that took place ten years ago between me and my ex-wife."


Callaway looks like she's about to fade away but the fans jump start her back into action with an "ALLY!" chant. Callaway breaks free by utilizing a devastating eye rake to Eli James.


John Madison: "Are you kidding me? I'm pretty sure that eye rakes were outlawed in the 80s, Gio, yet you have the nerve to bar The Congregation?"


Giovanni Ferari: "Do you honestly believe that an eye rake is worse than outside interference?"


John Madison: "Absolutely. People have been interfering in wrestling matches for the past thirty years!"


Callaway works Eli to the ground with some stomps, eventually causing him to fall out of the ring. Callaway runs off the ropes and glides through the rope for a suicide dive on Eli, but Eli side steps and catches Callaway in the side of her face with a forearm block.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Ouch! Callaway just ran full speed into Eli's forearm. I think that even hurt Eli a little bit."


John Madison: "Nothing can hurt this man, Gio. You bite your tongue."


Eli regroups in the ring as he stares down at Callaway who's knocked down on the outside. Eli tells the referee to count her down.


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Callaway uses the apron to pull herself up!


Giovanni Ferrari: "That was a close one. I think a move like that could knock out just about anybody."


Eli shakes his head as he reaches from inside the ring to grab Callaway by the hair on the outside. He pulls on Callaway, trying to drag her inside the ring by her hair, but Callaway reaches into her cargo pants and reveals brass knuckles! She then punches Eli James in the head with those brass knuckles! Eli lets go of Callaway's hair and falls on his back.


Callaway reenters the ring. She spreads Eli's legs and fist drops the brass knuckles directly into his groin area! Callaway then mounts on top of Eli and overwhelms him with a flurry of brass knuckle punches! Eli tries his damnedest to cover up but Callaway is still dealing a lot of damage to whatever body part she touches with that brass fist.


John Madison: "Not again!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "We saw something similar to this last week when Tony Santos whipped Eli James with a tire iron like he was handling a belt!"


John Madison: "GOD DAMN IT, MYSTICA! Where in the hell is Mystica?!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "He's barred from ringside, you imbecile!"


John Madison: "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK! Mystica should be willing to put his job on the line for Eli here..."


Callaway finally becomes tired of striking Eli James and returns to her feet. She yells at the ref to count him down!


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Eli gets up, just barely. He's having to use the ropes. The camera gets a close up of his busted lip and roughed up face. He's surely going to be sporting some bruises in the next couple of hours.


Callaway kicks Eli and throws him into the ropes. She catches him with a devil lock DDT!


With the brass knuckles still applied, Callaway positions herself onto the second rope. She cocks that brass fist of hers, jumps down for a fist drop, but Eli counters by getting his foot up into Callaway's jaw!


Both competitors are down now...


Giovanni Ferrari: "Callaway had the right idea about going for the high risk after that devastating devil lock DDT, but Eli is such a fighter."


John Madison: "I don't give a shit right now. Why the fuck hasn't Mystica come out here to help Eli?"


Giovanni Ferrari: "Because he doesn't want to lose his job!"


John Madison: "I don't care! Right now, his job IS to go out there and lose his job in order to help Eli."


Giovanni Ferrari: "I don't think that's gonna happen, John."


John Madison: "Yeah, well if Mystica doesn't get his ass down here in the next five minutes, I'm taking away his Superstar of the Month award!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "You can't do that!"


John Madison: "Sure I can! I'm the king."


Eli is the first competitor to stand up. Callaway isn't too far behind him though.


Eli stomps Callaway in the back of her head. Eli then throws Callaway across the ring with a belly to belly suplex. The brass knuckles come flying off of Callaway's hand as she rolls through the air.


Eli recovers the brass knuckles and applies the weapon to his fist now. He's got a sick smile on his face that gives away his full intentions.


He waits for Callaway to get up, and when she does, he rushes after he, but Callaway counters with a drop toe hold! Callaway then goes behind Eli and locks in a rear naked choke! Eli does whatever he can to keep Callaway from rolling him over onto his back with the rear naked choke still applied. He knows he's fucked if she rolls him over. Instead, Eli pushes himself up with his knees with hopes of being able to regain his footing. He eventually does, and slams Callaway back-first into the turnbuckle, breaking the rear naked choke. Eli keeps Callaway pushes into that same corner and begins attacking her with repeated back elbow strikes to the noggin. Eli doesn't even execute the strikes with precision, he just blindly slams his elbow back into whatever part of the head it happens to scrape against. Eli backs up, charges into the corner, and rams Callaway with a clothesline. He backs up again, runs, and smacks Callaway in the side of the face with a big boot. Callaway melts to the floor following the series of corner attacks.


Eli yells at the referee to counter her down as he takes a rest in the corner.


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Callaway has recovered!


John Madison: "HOW?!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "What do you mean 'how?' this match is for the US Title!"


Frustrated, Eli rolls to the outside and begins to seek out a foreign object from under the ring. He pulls out from under the ring a 35 gallon steel tub filled with water! What in the hell?


Giovanni Ferrari: "Why is there a tub of water under the ring?"


John Madison: "I... I don't know. Wait a minute, I think he's just introduce a refreshment station into the match. Another historical milestone in wrestling! This is good strategy though, Eli James looks like he could use a cold, hydrating refreshment right now."


Giovanni Ferrari: "I don't know, I think he might have other plans."


Eli James reaches his hand into the tub of water and begins to laugh at the thought of what his next move might be. He walks into the ring, throws Callaway into the ropes, and clotheslines her out of the ring. Callaway lands violently on the outside mat, only a couple of feet away from the steel tub.


Eli James grabs Callaway by the hair and drags her over to the steel tub that's filled with water!


Giovanni Ferrari: "Oh no, don't tell me..."


John Madison: "Ah yes, it all makes sense now. He's going to baptize this evil woman!"


Eli says a quick prayer for Callaway, and then proceeds to shove her head-first into the tub of water! Holy shit, Eli is trying to drown Alexandra Callaway in the tub of 'holy water.' Callaway kicks her legs as she splashes around, trying to escape.


Giovanni Ferrari: "This is sick! He could kill Callaway!"


John Madison: "Oh don't be so dramatic, Gio! This is a rebirth for Callaway. Eli is doing her a service by washing away all those sins. I saw him do this to Sin Wild just the other day."


Eli pulls Callaway's head out of the water. She's panting hard as Eli taunts her. Eli then shoves her head back into the tub of water.


Giovanni Ferrari: "This isn't a baptism, John. Eli is fucking drowning this poor woman!"


John Madison: "Yeah, uh... drowning her with the love of Christ... I don't even follow this religious stuff but I have to admit that Callaway looks cleansed right now. Eli is washing the devil right out of her."


Eli finally lets go of Callaway as she lays down motionless on the outside mat, drenched in water.


Eli begins to celebrate as the referee counts down Callaway.


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Callaway is up to her feet and is standing behind Eli who is still convinced that he's won the match!


Eli turns around and Callaway kicks him in the stomach! Callaway then gives Eli and STO into the steel tub of water! Callaway then tips the steel tub over while Eli is still inside of it, and water spills out everywhere!


John Madison: "What the hell! Jesus fucking Christ, that was god damn holy water, you bitch!"


Eli is startled as he looks down to find his clothes to be soaking wet. Not to mention, he was just shoved back-first into a small steel tub.


With the tub overturned on the mat, bottom facing upwards, Callaway picks up Eli and gives him a spine buster onto the bottom of the steel tub, creating a large indentation. Callaway backs off of Eli so that the referee can make the count. This allows Callaway to rest after being dunked in water and having to lift a 300 pound man in the air.


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Eli recovers just as the referee was about to throw his hand up for the ten count.


Callaway walks over to the time keeper's table. She grabs the United States Championship belt, and rams it into the face of Eli James. Callaway throws the belt down onto the floor and yells at the referee to count again.


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Eli is up again.


Frustrated, Callaway goes to lock in a Tazmission on Eli, but Eli counters but pushing Callaway forward into the ring post. Eli grabs Callaway before she can fall down, and drops her down with a Russian leg sweep onto the steel tub.


Giovanni Ferrari: "There is a lot of spilled water in that area they are in. That surely presents a tripping hazard for these two competitors."


John Madison: "Not for Eli. As we just saw, the man can walk on water without any problems. Hmm, doesn't that remind you of a certain famous guy?"


Giovanni Ferrari: "You know, for someone who isn't religious, you seem to really buy into Eli's message."


John Madison: "Because nobody has been able to prove him wrong! People always ask Eli 'where's the proof?' but he comes out here every week and delivers it to us! Open your eyes, Gio! "


Eli gives Callaway a reverse DDT onto the steel tub and tells the referee to count.


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Callaway is up! It's gonna take a lot more to keep this woman down.


Eli James goes under the ring again and begins to pull on something... something heavy.


Giovanni Ferrari: "What on earth does Eli have up his sleeve now?"


John Madison: "There's no tellin', Gio. Eli told me he had some surprises in store tonight."


As Eli pulls the object out from under the ring, we begin to notice the shape. It's some kind of large wooden object...


It's...


It's a giant wooden cross! A fucking crucifix!


Giovanni Ferrari: "You've got to be kidding me..."


John Madison: "You were right, Gio. This is gonna be a historic night! I've never witnessed a crucifixion before."


Eli begins to laugh as he lays out the wooden cross at ringside.


Eli picks up Callaway and carries her over to the wooden cross. He goes to give her a pile driver onto the cross, but Callaway reverses it into a back body drop onto that same wooden cross! Callaway then walks onto the apron and dives onto Eli on the cross with a senton bomb! Eli cradles his rib cage in pain as it was just pounded into the wooden surface by Callaway's 100 pound body.


Callaway is about to instruct the referee to start his ten count, but she sees Eli is trying to sit up. So she runs up to Eli and forces him back down with a double stomp to his chest. Eli lies back down on the cross, in pain.


Again, Callaway tells the referee to start his ten count.


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Eli is already sitting up again!


John Madison: "It has to be the cross that Eli is touching, it's giving him strength, Gio!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "It... no... it has to be adrenaline or something..."


Callaway runs up to Eli and drops him head-first onto the wooden surface of the cross with a running DDT. Callaway throws Eli into the ring. She slides the wooden cross inside as well and leans it up in the corner, similar to how wrestlers set up the tables in the corners.


Giovanni Ferrari: "I wonder what Callaway has in mind with that giant cross."


Eli has recovered by the time Callaway is done setting up the cross. She immediately goes for a spin kick, but Eli ducks her foot and takes her head off with a lariat.


Eli leaves the ring in order to fetch another object from below. It's a toolbox!


Eli reenters the ring, charges after Callaway, and smashes the toolbox into her face! The contents of the toolbox spills out onto the ring canvas as it bounces off Ally's face and hits the mat. Eli picks up Callaway with a headlock. He gives her a noogie and begins to sing Amazing Grace, loud and proud.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Eli refers to this chain of moves as The Cleansing. It's such a humiliating move for someone to endure."


Eli is about to finish off the sequence by driving Callaway's face into his knee, but Callaway counters by giving Eli a back suplex onto the wooden cross that's set up in the corner! There is a slight break, but the crucifix still maintains its structural integrity.


Giovanni Ferrari: "I'm surprised it didn't break completely with Eli's 300 pound body crashing down on it."


John Madison: "He's not 300 pounds, Gio! He's 290! Get your facts straight!"


Callaway removes Eli from the cross in the corner and plants him in the center of the ring with a DDT. Callaway climbs to the top rope and lands on Eli with a diving cross body. She waits for Eli to rise up to his feet and takes him back down with a running neckbreaker. Callaway picks up Eli again and this time drops him with the Bow To The Queen (split leg pedigree) Callaway doesn't stop there; she runs off the ropes and hits Eli with a double stomp to the chest.


Finally, Callaway instructs the referee to start his count.


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10-- NO! ELISHA runs in and tackles the referee before he can count to ten!


Giovanni Ferrari: "He's not allowed here! I barred him from ringside!"


John Madison: "Fuck you, Gio! I'm your co-GM, and I'm overruling your barring of The Congregation!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "What the fuck! You're my assistant!"


John Madison: "I'm the king and what I say goes!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "You can't do that!"


John Madison: "I just did!"


Callaway digs her claws into the mask of Elisha and throws him into the corner. She then stomps away at him relentlessly.


John Madison: "Sit the fuck down, Gio. You're not firing anybody!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "Ugh."


Callaway picks up an iron headed mallet that fell out of the toolbox earlier and smacks Elisha over the head with it, sending him crashing to the outside.


Callaway turns to face Eli with the mallet in hand, but it's too late. Eli runs into her with a clothesline that backs her into nearby the corner. Eli then takes the mallet out of Callaway's hand and hammers her in the ribs with it. Using the mallet again, he smacks Callaway on the back with it, causing her to fall forward.


Eli tells the referee to count.


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Callaway is barely able to pick herself up...


Eli takes the mallet and once again swings it down into the middle of her back. Callaway is down the count again.


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Callaway is up again. She refuses to stay down!


Eli walks up to Callaway and hits her with the mallet not once... not twice... but three times over her back.


The referee wants to count after witnessing Eli beat her with the the iron head of that mallet, but Eli tells him not to. Instead, Eli walks Callaway over to the cross that's still set up in the corner. He goes to slam her face into it, but Callaway shoves her fist groin of Eli!


Eli holds his groin with one hand while holding himself up with one hand planted on the wooden cross that's still leaned up in the corner. Callaway takes the iron mallet that Eli dropped on the ground a second ago. She looks over at Eli's fingers which are still outstretched on the cross, and she slams the mallet across the fingers of Eli!


Eli cries out in pain as he falls to the mat holding his hand.


Elisha runs into the ring to try to save his friend again, but Callaway smacks him in the gut with the mallet and pushes him through the ropes. Eli is on his knees now as Callaway stands over him with the mallet in hand. Eli is begging Callaway not to use the mallet on him. Callaway clocks Eli on the side of the head with the mallet!


The referee asks Callaway if he should count Eli down, but she tells him not to! She wants to inflict more pain with the iron hammer.


But wait, out from the back comes MYSTICA!


John Madison: "Yes! FINALLY, the superstar of the month has arrived to save the day!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "I told these people not to interfere..."


John Madison: "You're still on that, Gio? Get over it already, what's done is done."


Mystica slides into the ring and walks up to Callaway. He doesn't show any aggression towards her, in fact we aren't sure what his intentions are yet.


It looks as though Mystica is trying to negotiate peace. He doesn't want to see that mallet being utilized anymore on his two companions. He carefully removes the mallet from Callaway's hands. The audience boos loudly since they were dying to see Eli get what was coming to him.


John Madison: "What a brilliant tactic by Mystica. From now on, he's our designated negotiator. He's talking some sense into this woman. Hey! Mystica! Look, Gio-- I think he's telling that wench to get her ass back in the kitchen."


Giovanni Ferrari: "He is not! Will you stop it?!"


John Madison: "What? I could use a home cooked meal right about now."


Mystica successfully talks Callaway down, but she turns around to face Eli who drops her with a snap DDT. Eli then pulls the cross out of the corner and lays it flat on the mat. Eli drags Callaway and lays her on top of it. He retrieves the mallet and a six inch nail that fell out of the toolbox earlier.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Oh shit, don't tell me!"


John Madison: "Yes!!"


With the mallet and nail in hand, Eli James mounts himself over the chest of Callaway. Callaway tries to kick Eli off, but Elisha runs in to holder her legs down. Mystica stares down in horror of what might happen to Callaway.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Do something, Mystica!"


John Madison: "Yeah, Mystica! Pull your thumb out of your ass and hold the nail steady for Eli!"


Eli holds the nail steady onto Callaway's palm and is about to hammer it when Mystica interrupts by grabbing Eli's wrist!


Giovanni Ferrari: "Yes!"


John Madison: "What are you doing, Mystica?! Unhand him at once!"


Mystica is shaking his head; not a single word leaves his mouth but his facial expression says everything. Eli James nods his head as if to put Mystica back in his place. Mystica breaks down. He lets go of Eli's wrist and instead places his hand over Callaway's hand on the cross.


Giovanni Ferrari: "Oh my God, Mystica is basically telling Eli that if he's gonna hammer a nail into Callaway's hand then he's gonna have to take him with her!"


John Madison: "GOD DAMN IT, MYSTICA! You're ruining the crucifixion! Get out of the way, you ugly hobbit! That's it, I'm taking away his Superstar of the Month Award!"


Eli places the tip of the nail over the top of Mystica's hand which is holding Callaway's. Eli promised that he wouldn't stop Mystica from being with Callaway, but at the same time he has to put Callaway down.


Eli raises the mallet over his head and pauses as a way to warn Mystica. It's like a mental battle between these two. Eli wants Mystica to move and Mystica wants Eli to just drop this crazy act. Eli looks like he might not do it... but then he slams the hammer down over the nail and drives it through the clasped hands of Mystica and Callaway! Somehow, Mystica maintains his silence as he holds Callaway who's screaming in pain as Eli nails their hands together into the cross.


Giovanni Ferrari: "This is sick! How can Eli go through with this?! John, stop this damn it!"


John Madison: "What are you talking about? Eli is a man of his word-- he said that he would never separate Callaway and Mystica! He actually brought them closer together. This is beautiful."


Once Eli is finished he stands up to admire his work. Callaway is now fastened to the ground with her hand and Mystica's hand nailed on top of each other into the cross.


Eli tells the referee to count.


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10!


Giovanni Ferrari: "Damn it. Screw you, John. Screw you and The Congregation."


John Madison: "What? You can't say that, you're the General Manager!"


Giovanni Ferrari: "AM I, JOHN? Then why are my rules being shit on?"


John Madison: "Because... uh... because I'm fat! There I said it."

WINNER(S): And still United States Champion, Eli James IV

The entire arena falls silent, in shock, as they watch the medical team go to work on Mystica and Callaway. Meanwhile, Eli James holds the United States Title high into the air.


Giovanni Ferrari: "How can Mystica allow for this to happen? His leader just put a friggin' nail through his hand in order to win the match."


John Madison: "Oh come on, Gio. I don't think Mystica was even hurt by it. He looks fine to me. That scar is gonna look pretty sweet afterwards."


Giovanni Ferrari: "You're a piece of shit."


After the doctors remove the nail from Mystica's hand, they wrap it up with a bandage in order to control the bleeding. Once his hand is wrapped, Mystica pushes the doctors off of him so that they can help Callaway.


Mystica looks up at Eli with a scornful look on his face. Eli just smiles back at Mystica. Mystica walks forward and the two embrace.


Giovanni Ferrari: "You've got to be kidding me."


John Madison: "Mystica knows his place, Gio."


Giovanni Ferrari: (dropping headset) "I have to go, I can't watch this."


The show ends with Eli James IV and Elisha celebrating while Mystica looks down at Callaway.

Nice results guys.

Great show everybody! And congratulations to whoever wrote the last match. It was very good!

wow that was amazing! I loved The Eli/Callaway finish.. that was pure perfection.

I think it was perfectly romantic....

epic results

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion