The scene opens in a local casino in Singapore. As the camera pans the casino, an old lady can be seen playing the quarter slots with a gigantic bucket of change. The casino guards can be seen eye balling many of the people in the room. One guy in particular just lost his seventh hand of poker. His eyes look around for an exit because he is playing with house money. At the craps table, someone is cheering as they have just picked the right numbers on the dice. Jonny Rebel is seen walking around, observing everything. He walks by all the temptations to the Texas Hold 'Em tables. That's Jonny's vice at the casino.
Jonny Rebel::Lately, I've been knocking other guys and bashing people. But the thing luring me into these verbal beat downs of the XWF roster is the European title. It would help me solidify my position in XWF and make the other boot lickers understand what they are up against. I'll start with the European title, and then not just climb the ladder in XWF, but I'll step on the faces of anyone that gets in my way. I will knock them down and put them down; like a lame horse or a mangy mutt.
Jonny Rebel:: But I'm must confess....I absolutely hate the idea of a title being named in honor of Europe. Aside from Merica, what good thing has come out of Europe? With the exception of Steven Seagal, no American goes to Europe to be famous. Most famous Europeans are so because they made it in America— I am looking at you Christian Bale, Penelope Cruz, Arnold, and Amy Winehouse! (But maybe this one was famous because she was insane rather than European). I mean look at all the Europeans we have here in XWF. Even the snootiest of Europeans will concede the fact that America dominates pop culture and everyone else is playing catch up.
Everything in Europe is smaller, and I mean every freaking thing. Their coffee cups are far too small, Euro baguettes are microscopic, and their donuts do not hit the spot. Cars are too environmentally conscious to function. Hello, have you ever tried to buy a Coke in any European Capital? Both volume and portion are smaller.
Jonny Rebel:: America has way better, faster, and cheaper Wi-Fi: for an hour of Internet in a European airport you can feed a needy Afghani family for two weeks and have enough change to buy yourself a dirty magazine to celebrate your good deed.
And last but certainly not least, Europe took something as horrible as David Hasselhoff and they celebrate the man. They listen to his awful music and enjoy it. I can picture Andrew Aldway sitting in his basement with David Hasselhoff playing on the stereo.
Jonny Rebel::After I win the number one contender spot for the belt, and then defeat whomever has it, I going to make some changes. I have a plan for that title to bring respect back to it. All in due time.
Jonny turns and sits at the table. He puts his pile of chips on the table as the scene fades.
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