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X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » War Games 2023 RP Boards
The meaning of a name
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Lacklan Offline
World's best at making murderhobos cry



XWF FanBase:
The 'cool' kliq fans

(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty while setting the trends)


#1
06-03-2023, 09:13 PM

“I swear to GOD, Shinjiro! And THEN she-”

Shinjiro Nakama, the Mountain himself, barely repressed his sigh as he spooned another mouthful of miso. It had only been minutes since Short Sister had stormed into his home, hands waving and spittle flying like the blossoms of a cherry caught in Makurazaki’s violent winds, but it now felt like hours.

“OH! OH! And get THIS! She said-”

Days, perhaps.

“.....HOW is that legal, Shinjiro? HOW?!”

He slurped loudly before setting it down gently, trying to avoid a loud CLINK! of porcelain cup touching plate. He often tried to be gentle, trying to be cognizant of his size. Whereas Sarah, or Short Sister, was a diminutive thing, and Angelica was Tall Sister by comparison, he was towering, and not just in height. He was tall enough for Angelica’s head to only reach his chest…and Sarah not much beyond his waist…but his width and strength were the true source of his self-imposed gentleness. Their father had been a massive man, a genetic gift from God whose bulging muscles had been aided by what was rumored to be an expansive array of experimental steroids, and Shinjiro’s share of that physique was the lion’s.

“...honestly, the very THOUGHT that Angelica would even THINK of using that DISGUSTING and HIGHLY ILLEGAL move in our match is such a betrayal that I can barely breathe!”

The Mountain grumbled, though the pacing, flailing, spitting Sarah didn’t seem to notice if it had been in agreement or not. It had not been, in fact. This argument with their sister that she was relaying…a suspiciously one-sided relaying, he noted…had already been relayed to him by Tall Sister. His mouth almost broke it’s typically stoic visage in the ghost of a smile as he recalled that earlier conversation:

“I canNOT beLIEVE that Sissy would THINK that I would EVER cheat, Shinji!”

He found it humorous how much the two of them reflected one another, despite not being reared together. While the three of them had no knowledge of one another in their youth, the sisters had found one another through Providence and, again through the Hand of God, been informed of their shared patronage. And though it had not been long after that his own mother had decided to inform the rest of their existence, he didn’t have the time spent that they had. The years together, as friends, stablemates, and siblings, had created an interesting bond.

“.....well?!”

Shinjiro blinked and snapped back to the present, his mind moving foggily out of the haze of memory and introspection. Short Sister stood before him, her pale face so flushed as to nearly match her eyes, looking up at him. He closed his eyes for a moment to absorb what she had asked.

“Do YOU think the ‘EW!’ should be legal?!”

He opened his eyes and cleared his throat.

“Everything is legal in Japan, Short Sister.”

Sarah’s eyes bugged out from behind her glasses and turned so bright that Shinjiro could feel their heat as if he had set his furnace ablaze.

“UGH!”

She stomped her feet, the THOCK! very loud as her heel slammed into his hardwood floor.

“It’s not FAIR! It’s ALWAYS….and I do mean ALWAYS…ANGIE ANGIE ANGIE!”

The need to smile again nearly pierced through his mask of stoicism. He hid the near breach by taking a hand to wave away a lock of his hair, as bright white as Sarah’s away from his forehead and eyes. His hair had been as much of an oddity as his size: A massive hāfu with a head of natural peroxide blonde hair. Another genetic gift from their sire, but one that the two shared while Tall Sister was left without. She would have to deal forevermore with the unremarkable golden-blonde of her mother.

“Do you fear her might?”

Shinjiro’s voice was deep and gravely, as if he gargled the rocks that made up his namesake. Videos showed that he shared their father’s voice, though with different accents, whereas Short Sister hid her Maine accent with her own mother’s English, and Tall Sister’s was an odd mix of Canadian and Texan. His question was met with a petulant sideways glance.

“No. Yes. Maybe.”

She turned away her gaze for a moment before returning it.

“Let us not be silly: She’s as much a Lacklan as I am, or you are, which means she’s a threat full of danger. While I certainly wish she’d focus more on her technique and less on her other aspirations…much like how I wish you would focus more on your school and less on your waistline…”

Shinjiro couldn’t stop himself from shooting a glance towards his expanding stomach after Short Sister’s latest passive-aggressive shot toward him regarding his dieting.

“...there is no denying her overall prowess. But I know that, in THIS venue, in the XWF, in the year of our Lord of 2023, Angelica cannot defeat me. So while I respect her abilities, hunger, and drive, I do not exactly fear her. But I am not proud enough to avoid being weary.”

“I agree. She has defeated you.”

Sarah’s eyes glared again.

“First of all-”

“Twice.”

Her hands began to shake.

“IN A WORLD THAT NEVER SHOULD HAVE EXISTED!”

Shinjiro assumed that Sarah intended her voice to roar as strongly as any lioness, but it was far closer to the keen of a particularly petulant yōkai. She began to pace again, thankfully far enough away so as not to “accidentally” strike him with a flailing arm.

“YES, Angie has defeated me in singles combat, but that was in a place in time which never, ever, EVER should have even been a THING. It was in a place where I wasn’t in my right mind, in a place where I was surrounded by bad influences and ‘friends’ who were all the while trying to take me down without me knowing. I was an emotional wreck: I was fighting with Kenzi…I had to deal with an entire company who hated my guts and wanted to see me lose…I had just learned of our shared blood and being convinced that she wanted to steal my life…”

A mischievous smile grew on her face as she turned to him.

“...I wonder how the XWF audience and her War Games team would react to learn that Angelica Marie Vaughn, cat mom extraordinaire and happiest girl in the world, straight-up LIED to me for sixteen GODDAMN MONTHS!”

While he was firmly on Tall Sister’s side in regards to the legality of her mandible claw, he understood Short Sister’s pain in this regard: Angelica had learned of their sisterhood first, the Hand of God moving through her mother and giving her the news of her who her father was, and instead of immediately telling Sarah the Good News, she had squirreled away that knowledge for uncertain reasons. When the truth had come out well over a year later, and from a source NOT Angelica, it had not gone well.

“Think about that, Shinjiro! Sweet Angelica, so loving and giving and supportive, outed for being as selfish and manipulative as her ‘evil’ sister. That would be enough truth to make her team choke.”

She stopped her pace, her shoulders moving with great breaths, and then sagged. She looked up, her face suddenly tired, and she sighed.

“Scoot over, you big lug.”

Shinjiro gently pushed his plate to the side, safely out of the way of his strength and her fury, and made room on the floor. But to his surprise, instead of sitting next to him, she swung around behind him, pressed her back to his, and slid downward until her bottom hit the wood with a soft PLOP! He took a moment to pull his legs out from underneath him, being careful not to jostle her, and matched her position of sitting with his legs stretched out. They had never sat this way before but, with their backs pressed together, as if keeping one another up, with her head nestled between his shoulder blades, it felt…natural.

“I love Angelica. As I love you. I think that, should we ever truly bear our arms together as one, we would shake the world’s foundations so hard that it’s razzing would be automatic. But…I swear to Baby Jesus…I will break her if necessary. Break her to rebuild her. And this illusion she has had all these years…”

Shinjiro felt her shake her head across his back.

“Vita…a dear friend and rival, and a particularly meaty bone to pick with Angelica…recently got on my case about the duality of my statements that Angelica is both my equal yet also lesser than me. She’s not wrong, but she also isn’t right, if that makes sense. It’s complicated, nuanced. The entire wrestling world, not just the microcosm of the XWF, repeatedly assaults Angelica as being a hanger-on to myself, Roxy, and my Beloved. And that, as I repeatedly state, is wrong. Her own accomplishments have proven that fact and brought validity to my argument.”

Sarah’s pause was pregnant, full of weight.

“However…”

His prompt seemed to help.

“However…her detractors aren’t exactly wrong, either. Within the XWF, much has been made of the idea that someone becomes better after facing someone else, or associating with them, or fighting them. Kido, our Universal Champion-”

“The Lion.”

“...yes…him…”

Shinjiro smiled at the mention of the Lion’s name.

“...one of his MANY faults and points of his lack of self-awareness is how he likes to point out that Billy becomes Y Champion after facing him, win or lose, as if just being in his mere presence somehow rubs some of his greatness onto them. But our clueless champion is not alone in this idea; indeed, there have been MANY people to say this drivel, from Maine to Page to Bourbon. And while I roll my eyes at such self-important silliness, there is a ring of truth and merit when it comes to our sister. Angelica grew to amazing heights BECAUSE of the growth she experienced after coming into my camp. Mind you, I firmly believe it was God’s plan, obvs, so as to unlock the potential of her Lacklan genes, but the fact remains that it HAD to happen. Truth be told, if it were not for ME and MY acceptance of some random rookie blonde sucking at the teet of a bimbo tag partner and trainer named Williams in Ladies All Star, she’d be slumming at the bottom of the card in some CCW group hoping to qualify for the Intercuntiticle Cup. Instead, because of ME, she’s been World Champion around the globe in all sorts of styles. Without me, she’d never have pushed herself to try new things, go to new places, be MORE than she was on the surface. Without ME…”

She trailed off again and then sighed.

“But this isn’t even about her, Brother. It just so happens that the XWF Booking Committee couldn’t pass up the chance to book Lacklan vs. Vaughn as soon as they got the chance. This is about what’s standing next to her.”

The Mountain rumbled, which Sarah correctly took to mean “Continue.”

“I mentioned Vita before, and I do not make Baby Jesus cry when I say that I love her dearly. She is as talented as someone not in our House can be, and I consider her a cornerstone of my present set of plans. We have faced time and again, and while I have always had my hand raised, I am confident that she has taken every error to be a driving force into making herself better. I can be her talisman, her focus, like the bedazzled staff of a wizard, to create a perfect warrior out of herself. But that monster standing next to her?

“Oz tells me to believe in him. He tells me to believe in him, his path, his ideas, his way, as he believes in me. But he doesn’t even believe in himself. He has been on so many paths and taken so many turns that he might as well be a 2023 version of Eli James and jump between the swamp setting fires to homes to a funhouse.”


Shinjiro didn’t know what Short Sister was talking about, but he was sure someone somewhere appreciated the obscure XWF reference.

“Oz has been so busy trying to find himself in the five years I’ve known him that he’s forgotten how to axly DO anything for more than five minutes! I certainly appreciate needing to find yourself, needing to slow down and focus, but he’s made a joke of it to the point where even the Madness brand would scoff at him showing up. Yes, he’s big, strong, powerful. But I’ve made a career out of making big, strong, powerful men look stupid as I make them tap out in fear of their shoulder being ripped free, or sent into the depths of the Abyss. No, just like how this isn’t REALLY about Angelica, and it’s not REALLY about Vita, it’s certainly not REALLY about Ozzy. No…no…War Games? Is about the Lion.”

Shinjiro perked up at Kido’s mention again.

“How so, Short Sister?”

He could feel her chuckle.

“Because I’m going to eliminate the Universal Champion.”

He felt her elbows stab into his back as she pushed herself up off him and the floor. He turned, careful to not hit anything with his large arms, and saw her as she began pacing again.

“THIS War Games isn’t about teams, Brother. THIS War Games isn’t about survival of the first round, it’s not about winning the second round, it’s not about getting the ring or whatever the hell it is these days.”

She stopped for a moment and smirked.

“Funny Story: My first…and only…War Games was different: No second round. The winning captains were entered into some clusterfuck for the Universal Championship against Maine…I carried Big D that that match, obvs…and the captain would denote a Team MVP. That was me…obvs…and those MVPs were allowed a shot at any other title of their choosing. I never axly cashed mine in…I was focused on becoming the Queen of Anarchy at the time, you see…but I’ve always wondered what would happen if I went up to Atticus Gold, Glory be His Name, and told him I was ready to challenge for the Hart.”

She giggled and resumed her pacing.

“THIS War Games is about taking a smug little boy with his head lost in the clouds of imagination so far back down to Earth that he’ll spend the next three weeks washing the dirty knots from his stupid hair. THIS War Games is about showing the entire WORLD that Kido is nothing more than the bland, boring, middle class overachiever I have said he is.”

She spun around and pointed at him, her eyes blaring.

“I am going to defeat Kido on Sunday, Brother. I am going to smash him, thrash him, eliminate him…HUMILIATE him. I, Sarah Lacklan, the GODDAMN UNIVERSAL CHAMPION, am going to make his utter failure in his prior War Games seem like a stubbed toe whilst walking to Primary School! Because Kido has become SO convinced by his own perceived perfection, SO convinced of his perceived infallibility that he has no CONCEPT of what it takes to actually come BACK from disappointment. Oh sure, every time he lost a match, he would take five seconds to say “Welp, oops!”...like when he promised to murder…literally MURDER Charlie Knickles on goddamn LIVE TELEVISION…talk about yet ANOTHER example his inability to see himself for who he is…a “hero” to be looked up to promising to literally MURDER an opponent in a professional wrestling match…and following up his failure with “Welp, guess I’ll get a girlfriend as one-dimensional as me, a puppy as brainless as me, and lie about another fact about a superior opponent that no one will bother to fact-check…because I’m a GOOD guy. MEOW!”

She growled as she stomped away again.

“That fucking loser. Shit-eating grin spouting false facts. At least Flynn axly tells the truth while he’s blatantly cheating to get his promotional videos to the legal runtime.”

She shook her head in disgust.

“But the important thing, the MOST important thing, is that Kido’s exit from this War Games is going to be caused by ME. And he is going to be so mad, so angry, SO enraged that the REAL Universal FUCKING CHAMPION defeated him when a match MATTERED and NOT in what turned out to be a useless match on Warfare that he’s going to beg…to plead…to scream out into the very Heavens that he wishes to burn that he gets the chance to prove himself against me. After what I do to him, after I crush both his body and his psyche, he’s going to DEMAND from every Authority Figure he can find, from Vinnie to Raven to Theo to Atticus, Glory Be His Name, that the next PPV Event, regardless of location or theme, be headlined by Lacklan vs. Kido II…Universal Championship on the line. And there, dear Brother, is where I will crush his very spirit to go with the body and psyche.”

She stopped and smiled.

“I didn’t draft a War Games team to WIN. I drafted one to DISTRACT. Robbie can destroy an entire cult of Ozzies. Noah will have Vita panting and sweating with one sweep of his hair. And all Lexi has to do is show Angelica a single cute kitty meme and my sister will be busy for hours. That just leaves Kido…and me…and what I have planned. It leaves Kido and his vast ignorance of himself against the Queen of Spiders…and the web I’ve been weaving for the last six months.”

She looked up at him.

“Do you know what TúrAnEr means?”

Shinjiro shook his head. He did not know what the name of the La’el kaiju meant, nor did seemingly anyone else.

“It’s Elvish…the only approved spider dialogue, obvs…for Victory…”

She pointed to herself.

“…for one.”

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