Weekend Warfare
Match 11th, 2023

Moments after the carnage disguising itself as the Tag Team Title Match between The Honorable Mentions and the #CoolKids ended, Vagabond is shown, along with with his crew, being escorted by security personnel to their car in the parking lot.  Jolene's mouth is running a mile per minute as she goes from insulting the XWF personnel, to acting all nice-like, to throwing out a few thinly-veiled threats.  The security team acts as though they can't hear Jolene and continue to lead her, Joe and Vagabond away.  Clyde Rover, oddly enough, is nowhere to be seen.

Joe Dohn:  "What.  The HELL!  Is wrong with you, woman?!  Please, Bondo, you have to believe me!  I had nothing to do with her going back out there!"

Vagabond:  "What's done is done."

Joe Dohn:  "But we'll figure something out, right?  I can't afford to lose this job!  I have friends who have kids!"

Jolene:  "You don't have any friends, you jackass."

Joe Dohn:  "Fuck you, Karen."

Jolene:  "It's Kirstin, you imbecile."

Joe Dohn:  "You're a fucking Karen!"

Vagabond stops walking. Everybody stops. He steps outside the circle of security without any trouble from them. This begs the question: what's going on?

Vagabond: "While I appreciate how... committed... you were to the character... I really could've done without the disqualification, Kirstin. I'm sorry--"

Perhaps thinking if she can just speak over him he won't say whatever comes next, Vagabond waits for Kirstin(?) to finish her plea for a second chance.

Jolene/Kirstin: "--I mean, I didn't do anything the real Jolene wouldn't have done! Come on, Vagabond!"

Chord struck. Vagabond points to their car, looking a little worse for wear now. Him, not the car.

Vagabond: "You'll find your paychecks in the glove box. Good luck in Hollyweird. And, uh... thanks for your service."

With a small wave, Vagabond turns to walk away, heading back toward the stadium.

(Not?) Joe Dohn: "Okay, so I know why you're firing her, but what did I do? Come on, man!"

Vagabond stops walking and looks over his shoulder.

Vagabond: "I'm not firing anyone. The job's done. It's over."

Joe tries to follow Vagabond, but the security detail keeps him back.

(Not?) Joe Dohn: "You actually expect me to believe you'd pay me $50,000 for two weeks' worth of work? I'm a good actor, sure, but YOU aren't fooling anyone."

Vagabond doesn't stop walking, instead he calls out over his shoulder.

Vagabond: "It's just money, Alex. Can't take it with you when you die."

The security team resumes their escort as Vagabond and them part ways. We can hear "Joe" and "Jolene" continue to squabble all the way across the parking lot as the scene comes to an end.



Clyde Rover, if that's even his real name, is in The Honorable Mentions' locker room, packing up his things and putting them into a duffel bag. The door opens as he slings the bag over his shoulder and turns to leave the room. Vagabond strolls in like he's just come home.

Clyde Rover: "Okay, so I know that didn't go the way we hoped, but I just wanted to say thanks for the opportunity. I guess it's back to the indies I go."

Vagabond: "Oh? Leaving so soon? But the real fun's just about to start."

Clyde Rover: "Sir?"

Vagabond: "Do you think it was wrong of me to do what I did?"

Clyde Rover: "You mean, was it wrong of you to want to play out a what-if? Naw, man. I totally get it."

Vagabond takes a seat on the bench and motions for Clyde to join him.

V: "I think Kirstin played Jolene a little too well. It's a shame I had to cut her loose, but I can't keep living in the past."

CR: "Was Alex's rendition of Joe Dohn anything like the real Joe?"

V: "Meh. I should've let him swear more, though personally I'm not a huge fan of the sailor talk."

Clyde sets his duffel bag down and sits next to Vagabond on the bench.

CR: "Sir, permission to speak freely?"

V: "Permission granted. What's on your mind?"

CR: "What happened to them? I mean, the real Joe and Jolene."

V: "Well, one's dead, and the other, I think, wishes it was me instead. Sorry, I didn't intend for that to rhyme."

CR: "Jolene didn't survive that stabbing two years ago, did she?"

Vagabond sighs.

V: "No, she didn't."

CR: "And Joe? I take it he resents you for it?"

V: "Jerome. And yeah, even though he's never come right out and said it to my face--mainly because then he'd actually have to talk to me--I do think he blames me for what happened."

CR: "But why?"

V: "Short answer? I wasn't there to keep his baby sister and unborn nephew safe."

Silence fills the locker room. We can hear the fans reacting to whoever's in the ring right now.

CR: "What happened to the real Clyde?"

V: "Died last September. Helicopter crash."

(Not?) CR: "Damn, dude! Homies be droppin' all around you! Uh, no pun intended."

Vagabond chuckles despite the sad truth in his companion's words.

V: "I owe my life to him. He saved it two years ago. If it weren't for him finding me when he did I would've hung myself. I was pretty depressed back then, all things considered."

"CR": "Understandable. I'm glad you had such a good friend to lean on."

V: "Oh, he was."

"CR": "If I may ask, what caused the helicopter crash?"

V: "An inexperienced, overexcited pilot."

"Clyde" doesn't say a word, he just waits for Vagabond to continue.

V: "He'd just gotten his piloting license. First few times he flew alone went fine, but as his confidence grew he started throwing caution to the wind, so to speak. He was showing off, not paying enough attention, and he lost control of the helicopter when a goose flew into the propeller."

"CR": "Shit."

V: "But you know something? Had he survived, it would've eaten him up having killed that bird. That's the kind of guy he was. He could rip your arm off one minute and then offer to sew it back on the next, and he loved animals."

"CR": "Sounds like he was a force to be reckoned with."

Vagabond has gotten up and is now in the process of collecting his things. Talking about his lost friends and family has taken a toll on him, as evidenced by the tear sliding down his face into his beard.

V: "Now that you know the whole story, what do you think?"

"Clyde" doesn't know what to say, so he doesn't say anything. He just looks up at Vagabond from his seat on the bench and watches him pack with his back turned.

V: "I just wanted to see what it would be like to have the whole gang together again. Clyde and I never got our big one. Now, thanks to me, you might never get yours."

"CR": "Dude, don't worry 'bout me. What's next for you?"

V: "Gonna apologize to the fans for misleading them, apologize to Sarah and Angie for... whatever the hell that was out there. And then, I don't know, I guess I'll just have to keep moving forward."

"CR": "Still want those Tag Team Titles?"

Vagabond zips up his gym bag before turning around slowly to look at "Clyde."

V: "I dunno. Still wanna get signed by the XWF?"

"CR": "Hellz yea! I don't wanna get to be your age and STILL be doing the whole indy thang. Uh, no offense."

V: "None taken, kid. You feel like doing this for real?"

He waves his hand between them, gesturing toward a partnership. "Clyde" nods enthusiastically.

"CR": "Where do we begin?"

V: "You can start by telling me your actual stage name."

"CR": "People call me Rufus Wrekker. Two Ks."

V: "Roof wrecker, huh? I like it, it works. Vagabond and Wrekker."

Wrekker: "We could call ourselves the Buff Dudes. Sarah might've come up with it, but I doubt she's bought the copyright, and we totally fit the bill."

Wrekker sees a full-length mirror on the wall. He gets up and leads Vagabond to it. The two men take a long, hard stare at their reflections. They do indeed fit the description of Buff Dudes.

W: "And NEW XWF Tag Team Champions... VAAAGAAABOOOOOOOOOOND..."

V: "ANNNNND WRRREKKERRRRRRRRR!"

V/W: "The Buff Duuuuudes!"

The Buff Dudes pose like bodybuilders until neither man can help but laugh.

V: "I appreciate you having my back. And it feels good to laugh again. Thanks, kid. After tonight's fiasco, I didn't think I'd be laughing again for quite some time. You know, for once, it feels good to be wrong."

W: "Nothin' left to do now but go see Theo Pryce, huh? Let him know what's up?"

V: "Yeah, and hope we don't get fired. I already sent our ride away."

W: "No worries. Worse comes to worst, I'll just carry you back to the hotel. Buff Dudes, roll out."

With a smirk, Vagabond follows Wrekker out of the locker room and the door closes behind them; their stuff still just sitting there, forgotten. Suddenly the door swings open and Wrekker returns, grabs the bags, turns and collides with the door that has since shut again. He slings both bags over a single shoulder, opens the door, and saunters out all suave-like as our scene finally comes to an end.


Somewhere out there is a special computer that does special, highly-classified, important things, even though it's name is SHIT. That's shorthand for Superhero Intel Tracker. It tells the user everything they need to know about the superheroes, like where they are and who they're after. Basically a police scanner. A really, really expensive police scanner, created by either a supervillain or one of the many government agencies from around the world. Nobody knows for sure. We don't even know who's hands the SHIT's in now. On the computer screen flashes a new alert.


... the 'yes' button is selected. Whoever clicked it, we can only see the back of their head as the camera pans out.

"The enemies of my enemies will become my friends, and soon the world shall be mine. What's more, the Just-This League will BE no more!"


With a villainous laugh, the mystery man turns around. Why, it's none other than The Atomic Bat's nemesis, The Widdler!

"I will convince The Buff Dudes to pledge themselves to me and I will become unstoppable!"


Rut-Ro, Raggy! The Buff Dudes seem to have gotten dragged into an age-old battle between good and evil! Can Vagabond and Wrekker sort things out before March Madness? Don't close your browsers just yet, because this is definitely