11-26-2022, 06:43 PM
You are beautiful on the inside
You are innocence personified
And I will drag you down and sell you out
Run away
I am cold like December snow
I have carved out this soul made of stone
And I will drag you down and sell you out
Embraced by the darkness, I'm losing the light
Encircled by demons, I fight
What have I become, now that I've betrayed
Everyone I've ever loved, I pushed them all away
And I have been a slave to the Judas in my mind
Is there something left for me to save
In the wreckage of my life, my life
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
Judas in, Judas in my mind
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
Judas in, Judas in my mind
Judas in my mind
Oh, this guilt is a heavy cross
There is blood on the path I walk
And each step I take is haunting me
Embraced by the darkness, I'm losing the light
Encircled by demons, I fight
What have I become, now that I've betrayed
Everyone I've ever loved, I pushed them all away
And I have been a slave to the Judas in my mind
Is there something left of me to save
In the wreckage of my life, my life
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
Judas in, Judas in my mind
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
Judas in, Judas in my mind
Judas in my mind
Judas in my mind
What have I become, now that I've betrayed
Everyone I've ever loved, I pushed them all away
And I have been a slave to the Judas in my mind
Is there something left of me to save
In the wreckage of my life, my life
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
Judas in, Judas in my mind
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
I'm becom-, I'm becom-, I'm becoming
Judas in, Judas in my mind
Judas in my mind
===========================================
I’ve waited about a month for the chance to finally say this - you may think that I have made friends in some pretty low places recently, but my name ain’t Garth Brooks and my new friends aren’t country hicks looking for the next person to make squeal like a piggy in the wilderness. Well… okay maybe they would get joy out of the latter, BUT THEY AIN’T NO COUNTRY HICKS! When I look at Jenny Myst and Chris Chaos, they are a pair of deranged folks that understand me, they have opened their ears and closed their mouths, knowing they were given two ears and one mouth to listen more than they speak.
And sure, you have seen a couple of odd scenarios where they have tested my will and dedication of my allegiance to them, but sometimes you gotta employ a little bit of tough love to see where someone stands. There are people who view the fact I’m wearing this black mask because of the shame I feel for what I have been doing, but it has been quite the contrary. For starters, I got hit in the face by a fucking baseball bat, you fucking idiots! Aside from that, the mask resembles the way I feel like I had to live and walk around the entire time I have been in the XWF - hiding in the darkness, with no one willing to listen to my story. And now that I have found two people finally willing to embrace me for my true self, NONE OF YOU deserve to view me as I was meant to be anymore!
Over recent weeks, all the three of us have done is had Jenny bring home the Xtreme Title twice, Chris Chaos continue to bring Raion Kido to the edge of insanity, and well… I just continue to make my ex feel like she is in a real life version of a horror movie. One step after another has been taken by the three of us, exhibiting tremendous patience and a very cerebral strategy towards becoming one of the most dominant groups in the entire XWF. So while Theo Pryce has allowed himself to be overwhelmed by old friends Bam Miller and Chronic Chris Page, he’s been ignoring the fact that his company is beginning to ROT - every day that his time is preoccupied on something or someone other than Chaos, Myst and myself… the XWF is one day closer to becoming OURS for the taking.
So let’s address the elephant in the room that I briefly referenced a moment ago, which is the frequent torture I have put Lexi Gold through. About four months ago, I had the final conversation of my romantic relationship with Miss Gold. The final decision of going our separate ways was mutually agreed upon, but the original idea came from her. A relationship that had originally formed out of professionalism and me teaching Lexi some tricks of the trade in order to grow as a pro wrestler, I felt like there was still so much more I could teach her. But once she started tasting some success both in the XWF and beyond, the questions and teachable moments were becoming fewer and fewer.
Her wins were building up, the championships were being collected, and yours truly… was being left in the dust. No thanks, no respect, no acknowledgement of my contributions to her success. I was starting to feel as responsible for her accomplishments as her porcelain doll collection or her numerous pet snakes - I was being treated like a complete afterthought. And yet, when I finally gained a small measure of retribution when I invaded her house in Los Angeles over a week ago, everybody and their mother wanted to feel bad for Lexi. For whatever reason, all of you sheep want to believe that Lexi is completely innocent, that she didn’t bring ANY of this upon her, that Lexi is a complete saint who couldn’t have possibly said or done anything to cause my actions.
None of you know the real Lexi Gold obviously - how would you feel if you gave someone everything they could have ever wanted, they began to live an immeasurably better life of happiness and success… but you barely ever received a thank you out of respect for your efforts? I decided to take matters into my own hands, give her a taste of how violated I felt in the closing months of our relationship, how used and abused I was. But now, this is where we get to the good part. She wants “revenge,” while I want recognition - she wants retribution, I want acknowledgment - she seeks vengeance, I plan to receive acceptance. Lexi may believe that this is just one giant misunderstanding and everything will just go away after Bad Medicine, but oh no child… it’s just going to be the end of the beginning. Should I have known better than to get involved with a woman? Maybe. But should Lexi have known better than to try and dispose of me like a piece of garbage? You better fucking believe it, and now… I’m looking to win for keeps.
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