Please Login or Register to get full access to the forums.

Lost Password?
Current time: 06-19-2024, 08:49 AM (time should display as Pacific time zone; please contact Admin if it appears to be wrong)                                                                

X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » Bad Medicine RP Boards 2022
Soft Deadline The Vintage Radio
Author Message
Charlie Nickles Offline
The Nickleman

XWF FanBase:
Drug addicts, rebels, weirdos

(the villain you love to hate; has cult following; may deal drugs on side)

11-19-2022, 11:59 PM

We're not doing any phony bologna today on K-E-W-L 99.6, folks. We’ve got a real special treat for you all before this holiday season officially gets underway.

That’s right, Kip! We have no fluff pieces today, no paid segments: just one VERY special guest!”

Hold on now Heidi, I don’t think our guest will appreciate you implying that he has mental deformities. While you’re not entirely incorrect, it is still incredibly rude. You’re just lucky our award-winning guest hasn’t called in yet.

That’s not at all what I was saying, Kip! You bastard!

I’m not the Bastard….that’s who our guest is going to be, you silly mongoose!

I really can’t stand you.

And I can’t stand these old geezers, but their studio paid us a lot of money to play his music, probably more than they pay the Pete and Bas ghostwriters! So next up on K-E-W-L 99.6 is ‘You Know It’s Christmas!’ I hope you all enjoy it more than I do!

We fade into a shot of Charlie Nickles decorating a flocked Christmas tree just slightly out of season. You couldn’t tell him that, though, because he sure does seem excited about it. He has already set up a step ladder next to the tree and he has multiple boxes of stolen holiday lights and ornaments from the Home Goods store’s loading dock. Apparently, their security guards are massive pussies!

I’m so happy to finally have company for Christmas! It feels like it’s been forever since I had a reason to celebrate, and good people to celebrate with!

The Nickleman smiled far and wide at something off camera as he began ascending the step ladder with a slew of fancy glass ornaments in hand. As he started placing the ornaments on the tree the lightly colored stuff all over the branches started to shake off. Turns out that wasn’t flocking at all, just dust! It really has been a long time since he set up his Christmas tree!

We’re going to have so much fun this year…I hope you all get me a bunch of great presents!

The camera zooms out further to reveal the full picture at play here. The Nickleman is standing on the step-ladder in the middle of a cozy living room with a ton of championship belts in chairs seated around him in a semi-circle, facing the tree. The IIW tag team championships, the OCW tag team championships, the XWF Heavymetalweight championship, the OCW Savage championship, and the XWF Supercontinental championship all have their own chairs in the living room. In front of each belt sits an uneaten gingerbread cookie and a mug of no longer hot coco. Just behind the belts there is an active fireplace, and on the mantle rests an old vintage radio set to 99.6 K-E-W-L. The Nickleman looks back towards the radio, then down towards the Supercontinental championship belt with a huge smile.

Connie is definitely winning so far on the gift-giving scoreboard….I mean, do you girls even HEAR how crisp that radio is? It’s fantastic!

The Nickleman lauds praise onto his favorite championship belt as he descends the step ladder and starts busting out some red and green holiday lights from a box. The song on the radio fades through the outro and the K-E-W-L hosts come back on air.

What a great song, right folks?

Not at all, Heidi. Not at all. But I think we have our guest on the line now!

Oh that is fantastic news, Kip! Our listeners have been waiting to hear from him all week!

And now, he’s finally here! Welcome to the show, Chucky Murder!

Great to be hear, Kip and Heidi.

The Nickleman cocks a curious eyebrow as he darts his head towards the radio. It suddenly goes silent.

Wait a second….are you girls hearing this shit too? No? Just me? Okay….

Charlie shook his head from side to side as he started hanging the lights up around the Christmas tree. The radio cackles back to life as The Nickleman works on the tree.

So Mr. Murder, we invited you on today to talk about a topic that is very near and dear to me.

Only because you’re a midget.

That’s besides the point!

Uh huh…

Just ignore her, Mr. Murder, because she’s kind of a bitch.

Yeah, I kinda picked that up. So what did you bring me here to talk to the families and the kids at home about, little man?

Well last time we aired your remarks on K-E-W-L 99.6, you gave us a very illuminating monologue on pussy. We were hoping you could do the same for us again.

I can absolutely do that!

I’m not even sure Chucky’s qualified to talk about that, has he ever seen one in person?

Obviously I’ve seen one in person, on many occasions in fact! Hell, I’ve beaten that pussy Ned Kaye three times inside that ring just for starters! And that’s just for starters!

The Nickleman stops hanging the lights on the tree and turns back to the radio, which suddenly goes static as soon as he looks.

Ok, did I huff too much paint this morning or what? Are you girls not hearing this shit? It sounds like whatever the sequel to Deja Vu is!

The title belts all remain silent, eventually causing Charlie to doubt his own senses.

Well then, if you girls all say so…

The Nickleman begrudgingly goes back to decorating the tree as the vintage radio kicks back to life.

So today, we're talking about pussy. Just this one more time, because it’s so fun for everyone…

The Nickleman stares back at the radio with a blank expression, almost as if he were caught in a semi-trance like state.

I rip pussy apart, it’s true. I leave it bloody and battered, like a god-damned Battenberg cake. Ned Kaye can tell that story better than anyone, can’t he? Fucking bitch-made pussy that boy is, from the cradle to the grave I swear.

The Nickleman nodded his head in a trance-like agreement with the old-timey radio projecting the distorted voice.

That’s why I asked Liam and Atticus to send Ned Kaye to slaughter. I think this is going to be a good time, and I know I’m right- but haven’t I said that before?

Haven’t you heard this all before, Ned Kaye?

Well tell me Charlie, hasn’t he?

He has…

The Nickleman’s eyes nearly popped out of their sockets as the words rushed out of his mouth without his will.

Indeed he has, Charlie. And now, he must suffer it again.

The radio’s distorted voice cut through the static like a butcher knife through flesh.

Because pussy never changes.

Do you remember when you were tag-teaming with Ned Kaye? You had a joint interview. The two of you stood shoulder to shoulder next to Steve Sayors, and Ned Kaye let you disrespect his dead lover and his missing mother all in one go. Where was the spine? Where were the gonads?

Pussy has no balls, it’s the way of the world.

The Nickleman couldn’t control himself; the words just rushed out of his spillways as if upon the radio’s command. His limbs began moving towards the radio. He looked over towards his championship belts for help, but they didn’t move a finger to help him. What selfish cunts they were!

Ned Kaye’s such a sad and lazy sack of shit: but absolutely no one should say he doesn’t deserve what he is about to get.

Pussy gets pounded.

The Nickleman brought himself up next to the radio, a clear look of concern flashing across his face as he unwillingly placed his hand on the antique device.

Indeed it does Charlie, indeed it does. I’d dare say Ned Kaye deserves this more than anyone else on the XWF roster. Anyone who bitches or whines about Ned Kaye ‘jumping in line’ or ‘double dipping on shots’ should just hush right now, before they make complete fools of themselves. I had to move mountains to get the fatcats to agree to this kind of contract termination.

Do you catch my drift, Charlie?

The Nickleman was forced to nod his head as the radio carried on.

Ned Kaye’s a walking, talking, LOSING, soaking wet pussy of a man. If he wanted another chance at YOUR CONNIE, Nickleman, then all he needed to do was ask: but he never had the courage. He would rather face off with a literal gorilla than with The Nickleman, as he’s shown time and time before. He knows what The Nickleman can do to him, does to him, WILL DO to him every time they face off in that ring.

So I had to loosen the gears and pull the strings to make this all come together, and by God, can you believe that it’s all going according to plan?

Of course, our plans always work…

Poor Ned Kaye, that pussyboy doesn’t even know that he’s walking into a Venus Fly Trap. We put that championship belt out in front of him, and now he’s walking right into his doom. It’s sad to see someone walk so willingly into their own death, but Ned Kaye has become such a sad excuse of a wrestler that it hardly comes as a surprise.

What was the last legitimate match that Ned Kaye won? Don’t even bother answering that question, because nobody cares. Ned Kaye is a symbol of the past, someone who has already given their all and showed it clearly wasn’t good enough. Ned Kaye is going to be strapped to you at Bad Medicine, but he’s been strapped to the legacy of his own failures ever since he fucked up a briefcase cash-in. He was too pussy to do what had to be done, and now, he’ll never get another chance. I’d say it was a sad story if it wasn’t so deserved.

The Nickleman broke out of his trance and pushed himself away from the radio on the fireplace mantle. The Nickleman landed on his backside as he stared up in awe at the seemingly magical radio. A sinister voice continued to rant and rave through the waves of static.

Ned Kaye is a bottom of the barrel talent, and that’s not an insult: that’s just the way the Trilogy clearly works. Raion’s the main event star, Jason Cashe is the rising midcarder, and Ned Kaye is the washed-up has-been clearly riding everyone else’s coattails. I bet Ned Kaye is constantly begging those fuckers to tag with him and carry him to a couple wins, but neither Raion nor Jason is stupid enough to sink their own careers alongside Ned’s. Attaching Ned Kaye is a bad idea….just ask his ex-fiancee! That bitch is a straight-up skeleton now, but hell, I guess that’s better than being Ned’s wife!

That whiney pussy doesn’t have a chance in hell of taking down the big bad Nickleman at Bad Medicine: trust me, I asked his fiancee to search around down there and she said even she couldn’t find one! The Nickleman puts pussies down, not just for the count- but for good! He crushes craniums, breaks necks, and takes souls. All Ned Kaye does is quit.

The radio suddenly clicks off, turning the scene to silence. Beads of sweat drip down Charlie’s face as he pushes himself to his feet and runs up to inspect the antique radio. He slaps it around for a few seconds, but that doesn't seem to do anything. Charlie quickly turns back to the XWF drone filming his every movement.

Did you catch that on film?! What the fuck was that?! Give me that footage, I need to watch it again!

The Nickleman rushes towards the XWF drone and attacks it. The feed cuts to black.

Edit Hate Post Like Post
[-] The following 5 users Like Charlie Nickles's post:
Jenny Myst (11-20-2022), Marf (11-20-2022), Prof. Bobby Bourbon (11-20-2022), Theo Pryce (11-27-2022), Thunder Knuckles™ (11-20-2022)

Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)