The screen seems to kick to life, with a low pitched whining signal that suggests that this is some sort of a pirate broadcast. There is a real shortage of keelhauling and peg-legs, though, as PLEASE STAND BY rolls across the screen, complete with a cartoon-ized skull with...well, there's the familiar spiky black hair and one huge, bloodshot right eye, like it's bulging out..

Then we switch to snow and a low roaring sound, like somebody's trying to fuck with the picture and the audio.

Finally, it snaps to life and we see...him...grinning down at the camera, hands folded in front of him, maddened brown eyes under a veritable explosion of black hair.

XWF...I'm so happy you called.

The words tumble out of his mouth in front of a psychotic giggle that would make Frank Gorshin (R.I.P) proud. Once Holland composes himself, he starts talking again.

Because ANARCHY and the name Erik Holland, they go hand in hand! But it's not just Anarchy, it's not a simple demonstration of the dissent of man, because ahahaha...as you know, passion with no direction can be construed as [/b]BELLIGERENCE[/b]..

Though Holland is fairly barking at the screen that he seems to have positioned on this desk, in this compound only God knows where--maybe Erik figured out how to open his own pocket universe--there is certainly a method to the madness we're seeing, a direction that he wants to go.

And there will be nothing BELLIGERENT about me, apart from the ass kickin' that's coming down on Jess Anderson's head in a few days. NO, I have a plan. I am going to stay one step ahead of Anarchy's inmates, the inmates in the asylum, hahahhaaaa... at all times; and if they think I'm locked in here with them, oh no no no, fight fans...you're locked in here with ME....Jess Anderson is sort of going to serve as a...a warning, get what I'm sayin'? X-Treme Rules, where I can do what-ever-i-want to poor ol' Jess Anderson and not only is it allowed, it's encouraged...

Dave Batista, eat your heart out. Again, another Gorshin-like chattering giggle as Erik Holland claws at his face barely able to keep it together. He may not have it together at all, and he may just be teetering on the edge for the camera's sake. 

It's sort of a case where the XWF fans, they get to see exactly what they're in for. Exactly what they've brought to their fair shores, and I promise you this, boys and girls; you have never, ever experienced anything like an Erik Holland match. When I am out there, I'll tell you right now, and scuse the shit out of me for gettin' sappy but I need every single one of you to tell me what to smack Jess Anderson across the face with; to cheer me on if she gets a couple shots in; and to be behind me every step of the way in XWF because there is not one ounce of blood i wouldn't spill for any of you, there's not anything I am not willing to do to make you believe in Erik Holland, to make you remember Erik Holland's match as the fight that TORE THE WHOLE BUILDING DOWN! WE have been apart for too fuckin' long and Thursday Night Anarchy presents an opportunity for a reunion of some kind.

Sweat is trickling down Erik's face now. It's either really hot in this makeshift compound or Erik has absolutely whipped himself into a frenzy, to the point where it's physically exhausting him.

Jess Anderson...you're invited to the party. Don't be laaaate...

The singsong voice that Erik uses dissolves into more uncomfortable cackling as the scene fades slowly to black, the audio remaining for a couple more seconds before that too, cuts off.