Darren Dangerous slams the door and sits down in front of a dinner plate. Two seconds later a hot blonde wearing just an apron lays down a thick cut porterhouse steak onto the plate just the way DD likes it - bloody.

Darren Dangerous: "You think I give a fuck about being on time? I don't. I only care about busting light tubes over Ghost Tank's stupid face and hanging him by his dick and balls on that meat hook. I came back because Barney Green called me up in my mansion while I was getting head from ten different girls, one from each ara of the world. An Asian, a Persian, a Latina, a Swede... you get the idea. I call it the cocklympics. Well guess what, you might be shocked to find out that the girl from India won the gold."

Darren cuts into his steak and red juice spreads all over the plate. He licks his chops.

Darren Dangerous: "So Barney calls me right after I launch my nut down the throat of a Native American broad named Sucks Like A Vacuum. He's like Yo D, you won't believe what goddamn Ghost Tank did to me, and then he told me what Ghost Tank did, how he attacked him and shit and took his tournament spot, then didn't even have the decency to be good in the fucking tournament. Barney would have won that shit. He'd have won it with a three foot long hard on the whole time. I might have even let him come squeeze my main lady's ass afterward, right Amanda?"

Amanda Hands nods from the stove top where she is already perfecting another huge steak for Darren.

Darren Dangerous: "Tightest cooze in Michigan, that's a fact. And kinky as fuck, just like me. Watch this."

Darren starts slamming his fork into his forehead until it splits open like an overripe melon. He bleeds all over the fork and the plate and the steak, but he takes another big bite anyway.

Darren Dangerous: "Amanda come use that superhuman tongue on me baby."

Amanda Hands races to Darren and starts licking his bloody forehead clean with a tongue that looks like it could be snatching up pygmies from a tall tree.

Darren Dangerous: "Ghost Tank I'm going to kick the dogshit out of you and there's nothing you can do about it. I'm the most hardcore motherfucker you've ever seen, but what's funny is that I'm not even the one you need to be most afraid of. I'm just here to tenderize your big ugly ass so that the daddy of violence, Big Barney Green, can come finish you off later. He owes you one, bitch, and I'm here to come post notice. Now I have to go, my steak is getting cold and it's time for my blowjob. Get down there baby."

Amanda Hands crawls under the table while Darren eats and bleeds, and the camera fades to black.