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X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » March Madness IV - RP Board 2022
Sound Bath
Author Message
Centurion Offline
Active in XWF



XWF FanBase:
Traditionalists

(has an old school wrestling mentality; no nonsense; less appealing to some younger fans)


#1
03-26-2022, 06:09 PM



You’re going to hear a sound journey that’s going to sound interesting, maybe soothing to you, and it will help relax your skin, bones, and water within your body.”

Centurion is aware of a lot of weird stuff that exists in the world, but the words “sound bath” were never something he expected to hear put together under any context.

We open up on a back lawn somewhere in Southern California. The house that accompanies the lawn is rather large – much larger than one would expect, knowing the property values of that area. Laying on blankets throughout the yard are lines of young women, all of whom have their eyes closed as they listen to the words of another, albeit older, woman in front of them. The older woman has multiple glass bowls, as well as various chimes and bells placed all around her.

The women taking part in this “sound bath” are all influencers on various platforms, whether that be Twitch, Twitter, Youtube, etc. Among that crowd are Nellie Cortinovis and Erin Morgan, who are lying next to each other, fully entranced in the experience.

Sitting on a side patio, out of visual range but not out of ear shot, is Centurion, who has a glass of wine in front of him. He looks incredibly bored, and is reading various notes on his upcoming matches. Sitting next to him is Ruby, who has her face buried in a comic book, and seems to have absolutely no interest in what is going on.

Now, take a deep breath.” The older woman says as she hits one of her sound bowls, causing a vibrating sound to be released. “Aaaaand let it go. Wooosh…” The woman gives the sound of an exaggerated exhale as she rubs her fabric mallet around the bowl.

I think someone should let go of the pot.” Centurion mumbles under his breath as the sound of the bowl dissipates.

Be nice.” Ruby says, though she is not nearly as passionate about scolding Centurion as she has been in the past.

I am being nice!” Centurion snaps back in a hushed, low toned. “This lady clearly has injected so much THC that her brain is nothing more than a Pink Floyd album cover at this point. I want to pay for her rehab.”

Are you going to go in with her?” Ruby says with snark.

Centurion blinks for a second, thinking about how to best respond to Ruby’s dunk. “…that’s different.” Centurion looks back down at his notes and turns a couple of pages as the lady hits a couple more sound bowls. Centurion shakes his head as he lifts some of the pages and studies them.

You know.” Centurion casually says, still softly and only to Ruby. “It’s really hard to sit here and listen to a sound bath while reading notes about Charlie Nickles, a man who likely never traditionally baths.”

We didn’t have to come.” Ruby says as she finally closes her comic book and looks over at Centurion. “We could have just as easily stayed in the hotel room and not worry about it.

Yeah…” Centurion says as he thinks more about what he’s saying. “…but I’m never one to turn down a free dinner. And it’s better to be sitting out here, rather than upstairs with the male content creators, who I assume are all talking about, I don’t know…chicks, and…cars, and…Mountain Dew.”

It’s the first time we’ve walked into a crowd and I was the one who felt old.” Ruby says in agreement. “Heck, I think Nellie is one of the oldest ones here tonight. Is this what getting old feels like? Everyone just sort of de-ages around you?

I don’t like how casually you asked ME that.” Centurion responds. “But yeah, kind of. It’s one of those things that’s like “oh, you were born in the 2000’s and yet you’re still legally allowed to drink.” It messes with you, but you do get used to it after a while.”

As the two of them are talking, the sound of rain begins to fill the lawn area. Centurion arches an eyebrow and turns to look, and sees the woman holding some sort of wooden pan with tiny marbles in them. She is walking around the line of people lying on the ground as she shakes the pan.

I suddenly feel like I have to pee.” Centurion says sarcastically.

I suddenly feel like I have to leave.” Ruby returns the energy back to Centurion.

The sound bath…therapist…person shakes the pan with more speed and passion as she steps over some of the people lying on the floor. “Allow your stress to flow like the wind – out and away, and back into the environment.”

Ah, is that all it takes?” Centurion replies with another snarky remark, once again causing Ruby to roll her eyes. “Hey Rubez, maybe before our next match, we should allow our stress to flow like the wind. You think Charlie will give me some time on Sunday shake some beads and let my stress be carried away?

Why does everything require a comment from you?” Ruby asks in a serious tone.

Centurion sits there and thinks for a second, not coming up with an answer to Ruby’s inquiry. “…I dunno. I’ve just always kind of done that, I guess. Trust me, you’re not the first person who has dated me that has said something about it.”

And yet, weirdly, you still keep doing it.” Ruby says with a slight smile on her face. “It’s almost like you enjoy annoying people.

That might be it.” Centurion responds with a smile of his own. “Or I just can’t keep my thoughts inside my head. I let them fester for too long, and my brain will start oozing out of my ears. I wonder which colored crystal I need to bang against the wall in order for that to no longer be a thing."

Ehem…

Centurion and Ruby both turn their heads to see the leader of the sound bath, as well as all 25 women participating in it, staring directly at the two of them. Nellie hides her head in her hands in embarrassment, as does Ruby, but Centurion just continues to push on.

Oh, don’t give me that look!” Centurion responds, doubling down. “You all know this is crap!

I assure you, this is NOT crap!” The woman says in a confrontational tone. “THIS has helped heal the body and minds of people for generations. Before we had things like prescription drugs, our ancestors would partake in therapies such as these to sooth their minds.

You think that, do you?” Centurion says, almost laughing. “Because I’m pretty sure, if my ancestors got stressed, they would invade a nearby village and kill a soldier. I’m going to have to check my history books again, but I don’t think ‘sound therapy’ was popular in ancient Greece.”

Even if you are right…” The lady says with no hesitation “…stress in our lives still exist. Perhaps you would not be so up tight if you partook in various therapies to calm down that destructive mind you have.”

The woman turns and walks back to her place in front of the group of women, who all snarl at Centurion for a second before lying back down. Ruby just sort of shrugs her shoulders as Centurion.

Well…she’s got you there."

------BOOOOOOOONGGGG!!!------

We reopen inside the apartment of Centurion in Chicago, Illinois. There, we see a closeup shot at a wooden display case. There is a glass top to it, and the inside has a red velvet lining. Sitting inside the case is the UGWC World Championship, and next to that, the Fight! NYC Bareknuckle Championship. The camera pans out just a bit to see Centurion, in a high-priced suit, looking down at his two titles.

They’re beautifully displayed, aren’t they? I had a professional fashion this thing after I won the World Title – I think it’s important to show off your accomplishments, especially as you hold on to them. You never know how long you’re going to have the great things in your life, so you should cherish. Sure, it sets you up for disappointment in the future. There is a chance that I lose both of these belts in the next couple of weeks, and this thing will be empty, but hey, all that does is give me more motivation to make sure that doesn’t happen.

Of course, Charlie, there IS room for one more in there. I specifically had this designed so it can fit three titles simultaneously; however, I have no intention on putting the XWF Television Championship in this case. No, I have another place to put it. Somewhere nice and cozy, just for it.


Centurion gestures to the side, and into frame walks Ruby. She is holding a generic cardboard Bankers box, which she hands over to Centurion.

That’s right, Charlie. Goldie’s going right in here. No fancy cases or beautiful displays for her. No, she gets tossed in the box, put under a desk, and likely collecting dust, only taken out for the moments when I need to show up at events with the thing in hand. I will disrespect the everloving fuck out of this title, before I melt it down and turn it into a set of grills and replace it with a new, better Television Championship. Why?

Because of you, Charlie. Because of what you’ve done. You’ve defiled and destroyed this title. Your constant obsession and coddling of the belt has turned it into nothing more than an expensive paperweight. The Television Title should be the top title on Savage. Instead, it’s nothing more than a prop – a shiny obsession that your goofy ass as completely devalued. This is why no one will admit it, Charlie – but everyone in the back is rooting for me.
"

Of course they’re rooting for you!” Ruby says, off screen, in a deep and mocking voice trying to imitate Charlie Nickles. “They don’t think they can beat me!

Sure, if that’s what you want to believe. Though, let me ask you this question, Charlie – what is more likely? The fact that people want you to lose the title because they’re afraid of stepping up to you and facing you, or the fact that people want you to lose the title because you’re an incredibly weird dude and you likely hang that title around your unwashed dick?

I’m….going to go.” Ruby says off camera after Centurion gets a bit more vulgar. Off camera, we can hear the sound of footsteps walking away and up a set of stairs. Centurion waits until he hears a door close before continuing.

That’s why I need to win this match, Charlie. Not for me – I can honestly take it or leave it. Another title would be nice, but I’m not going to act like it would be some life changing event for me. No, I need to win for the betterment of the XWF. Every minute you walk around with a title around your waist, while continuing to rant and rave like a homeless meth addict, you hurt the reputation of the X-treme Wrestling Federation.

Which is funny, because I know that’s not how you see yourself. Not that you care about the reputation of the XWF, but you don’t consider yourself to be a joke. In fact, you take yourself VERY seriously. I know this, based on some recent comments you made about me.

A couple months ago, you made a quip about me losing the Anarchy Title to Elijah Martin, and just recently, you made the same sort of remark about losing to Bartholomew Lichter. You mocked me and laughed at me, and that’s fine. I played down to my competition, and I got beat. That sucks, and I own it, but let me ask you something…

What makes you think you’re any better than those two?

When I lose to Martin or Lichter, it’s a big deal, because I’m a God damn legend and I’m supposed to win those matches. If you were to lose those matches, Charlie? You may get a “huh, interesting.” And that’s it. You’re certainly not on the level you THINK you are. You think of yourself as this main event caliber star. You think you’re the next person to win the Universal Title and become a household name…which is hilarious to me, because you’ve proven time and again you tend to shrivel up when the best wrestlers stand up to you.


Centurion walks away from the case, and the camera follows him. He walks up to a desk and pours himself a glass of scotch out of a crystal decanter. He pops the lid back on an grabs the glass. He looks at it for a few seconds before looking back towards the camera.

It’s called a decanter, Charlie. You put a certain amount is liquor in there so you can set it out in other locations and not make it look like you’re an absolute animal. I’m sure the only way you consume alcohol is through a funnel up the ass, but most of the world appreciates a certainly level of class.

I honestly feel kind of bad for you, Charlie. Well, kind of, sort of. I know you’re a lonely guy. Single life can be hard after being married for a while. Trust me, I know. That’s why you’ve fallen in love with a title belt – it’s the only thing in this world that won’t judge you for being an unkempt freakshow. Goldie will love you unconditionally. Goldie won’t tell you that you need to shower.

But I’m telling you, man – you gotta let it go. It’s not healthy for you. Someday, and that day is coming very soon, Goldie will leave you, and then what? You’re going to fall in love with a filing cabinet? You’re going to start fucking water fountains? At some point, you have to say “enough is enough”. You need to move on, and start being with actual human beings.

It’s alright, Charlie. I’m sure you’ll find someone who loves you. You have so much going for you – you’re dashing lo….um…well, ok, your great personali….uhh…oh! You’re a pro wrestler! You must have a lot of money that you didn’t blow on heroin and cheesesteaks!

…alright, maybe you’ll never find love, but that’s ok! Some people are meant to be alone. It doesn’t mean you can’t be happy. There are monks out there that spend their entire lives in isolation – doing nothing but praying, drinking, and pissing off the side of mountains. Actually, that sounds right up your alley, Charlie. Why don’t you become a monk? You’ll be doing yourself, and the rest of the world, a huge favor if you decided to just hang out in Tibet for the next 40 years.

No matter what, I hope your life turns around and you find a career that truly makes you happy. I say that because this pro wrestling shit is clearly not doing it for you. You’ve been a miserable bastard since you got here, and I don’t understand why someone would continue to do something when it causes them so much misery. But hey, maybe I’m out of touch. Either way, I’m looking forward to your next steps, after Goldie is around my waist, and you meet your…


FINAL FANTASY!!!

[Image: UdLSPlv.png]
XWF Record - 212-95-9
XWF All Time Wins Record Holder
Official XWF Legend
3x XWF Anarchy Champion
3x XWF World Champion
8x XWF Canadian Champion (Record for most Canadian Title reigns)
1x XWF Hart Champion
6x XWF X-Treme Champion
5x XWF Tag Team Champion
2x XWF United States Champion
Inaugural XWF IDL Champion 
1x XWF King of Anarchy
1x XWF King of Massacre
1x XWF Stable Champion
XWF Star Of The Month - May 2007
XWF Star Of The Month - July 2009
XWF Star Of The Month - December 2019
XWF Star Of The Month - December 2021
XWF Holiday Battle Royal Winner - 2007

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