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X-treme Wrestling Federation » Anarchy Boards » Anarchy RP Board
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Ruby Offline
The Super Dear'o



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#1
01-19-2022, 03:12 PM

As Centurion was riding the elevator up to his Chicago penthouse, he was wondering what he was gonna be in for. A cloned T-Rex in the bathroom, perhaps? David Attenborough sitting on the windowsill talking about a herd of galloping wildebeest sweeping majestically across his eighty thousand dollar Persian rug? A gang of poorly made up clowns who had just gotten their rejection from circus school but were invited inside for a bowl of hot celery soup? Or maybe just a chimp on top of the disco ball, or a bouquet of flowers upside down in a vase. Every day was an adventure when you were dating the Banana-Lime Blur.

After losing the Anarchy Championship he had taken some time away from home. As high as winning the UGWC’s World Championship had been, that was also the kind of low he felt after losing to Elijah Martin. People ignorantly called it a ‘C-title’, but it was also one that Ruby had pioneered. To lose something that his girlfriend had held and cherished for so long to a guy like that was something that hit him right in the one feel he had left at the time. Still, he was bracing himself for the scene he would undoubtedly find on the other side of the elevator door once it dinged.

As soon as it rang and the door slid open he instinctively winced and took a step back, only to be met with… silence? And much to his own surprise, this silence was way less awkward, uncomfortable and unpleasant than any alternative he could think of. Nellie smoking a Chris Page-shaped bong in the middle of the living room surrounded by a squad of castrato singers would’ve been preferable, if only slightly, to this. And Ruby wasn’t on patrol either, because her keys, including those of the RuMobyle, were lying next to her pommed hat on the dresser near the entrance.

Centurion: “I don’t get it. Usually something extremely weird has happened by now.”

Centurion was searching around frantically, lifting up the aforementioned rug, checking the disco ball for simians, and even checking the kitchen drawers for uncatalogued sentient beings. No luck. He was about to get *really* worried until he heard a loud, familiar voice coming from afar. He suspected it was the bedroom.

Ruby:KHIYAAAAAAAAAA!

Centurion: “Oh, thank goodness!”

He rushed towards the bedroom, slammed the door open, and was met with an entire photography crew. At the far end he saw Ruby standing against a neutral white backdrop, clad in the full superhero gear. As soon as Ruby saw Centurion, she leapt up in excitement.

Ruby: “YOOOO, it’s my mans! Take five, my guys!”

As the photographers started to scatter while muttering and checking their shots, Centurion raised an eyebrow.

Centurion: “What’s all this about?”

Ruby adjusted her mask and smiled.

Ruby: “Oh, just a shoot for the This Is Awesome calendar. You know, that promotion that handpicked me as one of the XWF’s representatives. TO be honest, I’m not feeling in my element, you know. I’m not exactly what you’d call a… superstar photo model.”

Centurion: “What are you talking about? I’m sure your month is gonna be great.”

Ruby: “I mean, maybe? But you know me, my mans. Like Marshawn says, I’m all ‘bout that action, baws. And you know who else is on that calendar? Atara! I bet she’s SLAYING it right now, just instinctively knowing how to whip her hair the right way, and how to position her hands and whatnot. Meanwhile, they asked me to ‘pose’ and I accidentally Pelé-kicked that floodlight.”

Ruby pointed upwards at a broken light that was dangling from an extension by a cord. Sparks were flying, albeit softly.

Centurion chuckled.

Centurion: “Babe, if they asked you for a calendar shoot, it’s because they wanted to capture the very essence of you and let the whole world enjoy it. And you do that in your very own unique way. So what if Atara’s great at looking mysterious and seductive? You bring something else to the table… or wall, I guess,… and that’s exactly what they’re looking for! I wouldn’t be surprised if the shot of you kicking that overhead light is the one they’re gonna use. So don’t feel inadequate. Because to me, and millions of others, you’re anything BUT inadequate.”

Ruby crossed her arms.

Ruby: “Great. Now I feel dumb, because everything you just said makes perfect sense.”

Centurion: “I’m not a guy who’s easily impressed, but you should know by now that you impress me just by being you. And that the two of us are a great pair. Inside of the ring, and outside of it.”

Ruby: “Yeah. You’re right. I just feel dumb because we should be focusing on Arcana and Caedus, not my insecurities. That girl pinned me last time around. Not entirely fair and square, but I’m not gonna sit here and complain about the fact the Anarchy referees are even worse than those in the NFL.”

Centurion: “And last time we faced a Caedus together, we pretty much obliterated them. So why can’t we do it again? I mean, I’m a World Champ these days.”

Ruby grinned and grabbed Centurion by the waist.

Ruby: “Oh believe me, I know. I also have it on good AUTHORITAH that you look uber-dapper whilst wearing nothing but such a big gold belt. Now, I’d buy a calendar of twelve months of nothing but that.”

Centurion: “I mean, there is a crew present…”

Ruby: “Sure. But let’s just get this ish done first. I promised the TIA people, not my auntie by the way, that I’d give them some shots. So sit back and enjoy the show!”

The photography crew, having ‘taken five’, got back. Centurion did sit back, and did enjoy the show. Especially when Ruby coincidentally, and wholesomely and totally accidentally, tornado-DDT’d a panorama lens camera. Neither Arcana or Caedus was ever going to have an answer for that!

[Image: dY7KZz4.png]
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"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (01-19-2022), Derrick Diamond (01-20-2022)




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