I let the music blast through the speaker as I pulled my mother’s wrestling mask down my face. I didn’t feel any comfort as the multicolored fabric tightened around my head. Usually these pre-match rituals comforted me, brought me a sense of peace….but not today….not since the funeral.

I shook my head from side to side in discontent. I stared scornfully at my wrists as I wrapped them in support tape. I couldn’t stop thinking about mi madre’s funeral and the man who ruined it. I couldn’t stop thinking about the woman who invited him, either: a woman I used to call my friend. I haven’t felt anything but anger since the last time I saw my mother’s cold corpse.

“Hey…got a minute to talk?”

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes as I heard Dolly turn off the music behind me. I turned around to face the commissioner of XWF Anarchy. Her smile quivered for a moment when her gaze met mine.

“No, I don’t.”

Dolly takes a seat next to me as I stare bullets into the near wall of the locker room.

“I know you’re going through a lot….”

“You don’t know anything about me.”

My pointedness had Dolly taken aback.

“I just….I know what it’s like to lose someone close to you. It can take a lot out of you. If you want to talk about how you’re feelin-”

“I am angrier than I’ve ever been in my fucking life.”

I turn my grim gaze onto Dolly.

“But I don’t want to talk to YOU about it.”

Dolly looks genuinely hurt by my words, but I don’t care. She shouldn’t have invited that freak to mi madre’s funeral.

“Well…..you don’t have to talk to me about it if you don’t want to- but the XWF does have counselors and therapists that can be really helpful for dealing with grie-”

“¡No quiero hablar con ninguno de esos pindicks!”

A look of confusion washed over Dolly’s face as a red-hot fire burned through my skin.

“Well-”

“ENOUGH!”

I shout at the top of my lungs as I rise to my feet. I look down at my ‘friend’ with scorn and anger. I feel the rage bubbling inside of my soul. I can feel the anger that I have tried so hard to contain finally boiling over.

“I’ve had enough talking, Dolly! All anyone ever wants to do around here is talk! I came to the XWF to WRESTLE, and that’s all I want to do now! I’m not going to let the divas and douchebags distract me anymore! I’m SICK and TIRED of being Miss Friendly, Dolly! I’m done being the woman that makes small talk with everyone and pays her dues! I’m done trying to fit in with the cool kids and I’m done trying to impress people!”

“What are you saying, Robyn?”

“I’ve been nothing but sunshine and rainbows ever since Vinnie Lane signed me! I’ve been trying to make everyone happy EXCEPT MYSELF! I’M DONE WITH THAT! Being kind and friendly hasn’t done anything for me besides turn me into a DOORMAT! People think they can say whatever they want about me now! People are DISRESPECTING MY FAMILY, Dolly! I try to be nice to that FREAK and now Charlie’s out here spreading LIES about mi madre! I try to be nice to Tommy Wish and now he’s stealing the socks out of my shoes and doing lord knows what with them!

I’m done with it, Dolly. I’m done with all of it. With all of you falsificaciones y impostores.”

“You’re quitting the XWF?!”

“What? NO! I’m not going to let you pendejos off that easily! I’ve been walked all over, insulted, disrespected- all because I was trying to be a professional, friendly, and positive coworker.

¡No más!

The Latina Submission Machina is getting a software update, and I’m going to show off all my new features tonight against Vita!”

Dolly looks set to speak again but I quickly shut her down with a dismissive hand gesture and a raising of my voice.

“I’m going to show EVERYONE that there’s a new submission machina in town! Vita is going to be my first victim. I’m done playing by the rules and trying to earn respect fair and square- that approach has turned me into a punching bag!

It’s about time to do some punching of my own….

Vita isn’t going to know what the fuck is coming for her. I’m not going out there to wrestle a fair and clean match, Dolly- not this time. Not anymore.”

Dolly looked up with worry. I stared back with determination.

“Vita doesn’t deserve to share a ring with me. I don’t care about her resume or who she used to date, all I care about is humiliating her the way that Charlie humiliated my mother.”

Dolly’s eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, but she kept her mouth shut.

“She wants to team up with disgusting people like Micheal Graves? I won’t be surprised if she teams up with Charlie next. She has awful taste, not only in men, but also in wrestling moves!

Like does that puta really think the rings of saturn is some fantastic submission maneuver? It’s nothing but boilerplate stuff, but if she likes it so much, I figure I should show her how it’s really done. I’m going to lock her in that submission and tear her limbs from her sockets.”

“Until she submits…”

I don’t even try to hold back my laugh.

“Ha! I don’t think so. I’ve got a lot of anger to work through, Dolly, and I don’t think a ringing bell is going to be able to stop me tonight. This isn’t about wrestling anymore, in fact, it’s not even about Vita….”

I start to walk out of the locker room before I turn back to recite one last line.

“¡Se trata de dejar las cosas claras para que la gente finalmente sepa con quién diablos se están metiendo!”