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X-treme Wrestling Federation » Anarchy Boards » Anarchy RP Board
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Don we now our gay apparel
Author Message
Ruby Offline
The Super Dear'o



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#1
12-08-2021, 12:39 PM

As he was riding up the elevator to his Chicago apartment, Centurion took a deep breath and held it for five seconds, savoring the feeling of coming home. There were few things like it, especially after a busy day. Sure, Nellie had taken over a lot of responsibilities when it came to career management, but with his name and standing there were still going to be days like these… He didn’t mind it, it came with the territory that he had established, but right now he wanted nothing more than to step into his apartment and give a big hug to the woman he…

Before he could finish that thought, it was like someone tweaked his ear, breaking it off abruptly. Nellie would undoubtedly give him unsolicited psychological mumbo-jumbo about it, but she wasn’t here right now.

The elevator bell dinged and he stepped into his place, which… He barely even recognized? Loud Christmas music blasted him in the face, there were flashing Christmas lights everywhere and a drunken dressed up Santa holding a burlap bag fell into the elevator. He started snoring and fell asleep right then and there. Centurion pushed the ‘Ground Floor’ button to send him down and exited the elevator, not sure of what was going on.

Centurion: “What the f…”

Ruby: “….LIP, right???”

Like a jack-out-the-box, Ruby popped up right next to him. She was wearing a tight spandex Superhero Santa outfit, which turned Centurion on more than he would ever admit to any living soul. It was probably the red mask that did it…

Centurion: “Babe, what’s going on?”

Ruby: “It’s Christmas time, Your Handsomeness! ‘Tis the season to be jolly and…”

She pointed at her outfit…

Ruby: “Don our gay apparel! I took the sliiight liberty of adding some eh… ‘lively’ Christmas decorations to the place. You’ll love them!”

Centurion: “Riiiiight…”

Realizing at this point it was going to be nowhere near the quiet evening he’d had in mind, Centurion stepped further into the apartment, and he was met with plenty of surprises left and right.

Centurion: “Babe? Why is there a real, live moose in our kitchen??”

Ruby: “Ain’t it the greatest? It’s Rudolph! Borrowed him from the Chicago zoo. Don’t worry, he hasn’t bitten a hand off in, like, five years. Besides, they have this concept in Europe called ‘Moose Bars’, so we can use our kitchen as one. It’s gonna be great!”

He couldn’t even find it in him to argue. It went against all conceivable logic, and still…

Centurion: “Okay, fine. So then… why are a bunch of dwarves dressed up as elves decorating an oversized Christmas tree in the living room?”

Ruby: “Oh yeah! Don’t worry about that, Warwick Davis owed me a favor, they’re from his agency. I once helped him retrieve his original Ewok costume from Return of the Jedi when it was stolen. They’ll only be here until New Year’s Eve.”

Centurion: “’Only’, huh?”

Ruby: “Yeah, they really wanted to celebrate with their families, so I couldn’t convince them to stay longer, it’s unfortunate I know. But at least we also have a Santa!”

Centurion: “Oh, the drunk one? I think he err… left…”

Ruby: “What? That motherflipper, I gave him like ten bottles of booze as payment.”

Centurion: “Babe, please tell me you didn’t give my Harridan Vodka to a homeless person just so he could dress up as Santa in our apartment.”

Ruby: “Okay, it does sound bad when you phrase it like that, but I believe in equal opportunities, Your Handsomeness.”

Centurion found the nearest soft spot he could plop down on, and ultimately fell into the sofa in front of the fireplace that two ‘elves’ were tending to. Ruby sat herself down next to him.

Centurion: “And to think I was going to come home, have a relaxing bath, dinner, cigar, and then we could discuss how we’re going to beat Hart & Caedus.”

Ruby gently put a hand on his shoulder with a frown visible above her crimson mask.

Ruby: “You’re… upset? I thought you’d like this… It’s getting closer to Christmas, and… I just wanted this one to be special, so I did all of this.”

Centurion smiled and looked into her eyes.

Centurion: “And what makes you think a Christmas with just you and me wouldn’t be the most special kind you could give me?”

Ruby blushed.

Ruby: “D’awww, you old sap!”

She hugged him.

Ruby: “Fine. I’ll get rid of the elves. And the moose. And the Santa. Which you already did, I remember now. But I am keeping my ‘gay apparel’!”

Centurion: “Please do. It’s hot. If you were still a redhead it might look even better, just saying. Red on red is always a win.”

Ruby: “Keep sweet-talking and I just might. As for strategizing, which you mentioned earlier…”

Centurion: “You wanna talk strategy when we’re curled up on the couch together like this? Usually that leads to different stuff.”

Ruby: “Yeah, but those elves are eyeballing us.”

Centurion: “I wish you hadn’t said that, because now this entire situation feels awkward.”

Ruby: “Which is why we might as well talk about how the only thing our opponents have to offer is a last name that should instill fear, which it doesn’t. And how we are a well lubricated machine that always comes in first place.”

Centurion: “See, that’s some weird phrasing, babe.”

Ruby: “I know what I said.”

Centurion: “I… adore you.”

Ruby: “Adoration’s good. Adoration and another DUB is even better! This couch contains the two greatest Anarchy Champs of all time. Us, together, losing? Flip naw, my mans. Not on the A+ show. I’d take a flippin’ barbed wire baseball bat to the skull for you.”

Centurion: “And I’ll always make sure you’ll never have to.”

Ruby: “Flip me, you sounded so much like Batman just now.”

Centurion: “Except YOU’re the hero that I don’t deserve.”

It’s probably best we cut things off at this point, dear readers.

[Image: dY7KZz4.png]
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"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (12-08-2021), JimCaedus (12-08-2021), Vita Frickin Valenteen (12-08-2021)




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