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Current XWF board time: 01-18-2022, 04:34 AM (time should display as Pacific time zone; please contact Admin if it appears to be wrong)                                                                
X-treme Wrestling Federation BOARDS » Anarchy Boards » Anarchy RP Board
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PlaceMarker Gobbledygook
Author Message
Ruby Offline
The Super Dear'o

XWF FanBase:
Kids, disabled people, casual fans

(fighting the odds; helps others; disliked by most adult male fans)

Post: #1
11-24-2021 01:32 PM

It seemed to be a normal day in Turkeyton. Jolly gobbles echoed throughout the city, and a bright, pleasant sun warmed the wiggly dewflaps of the roaming citizens.

However, near the city center, the national bank of Gobblegot was soon to be the place of a crime that would shake up the peace of the world’s fairest and featheriest locale.


Spoiler :
[Image: V7XBET6.png]

An evil turkey, armed to the caruncles, menacingly shot at the ceiling. The turkeys inside, coming for their deposit of corn, either scattered or fell to the floor.

“Oh no! It’s THE SNOOD!” a terrified turkey screamed as she covered her eyes with her wings.

“That’s right!” The Snood shouted back, before pointing his gun at the bankers. “And I’m here to relieve you of your corn!”

But before the bankers could even react, a dazzling flash blinded The Snood. His vision became blurry, and he could scarcely make out the figure in front of him, even though her words were loud and clear for all to hear.

“NOT SO FAST, SNOOD! Best stop your strutting, ‘cause I’m calling fowl!”

The Snood’s vision cleared up, and he saw who had interrupted his attempted heist.

Spoiler :
[Image: q87V1Ml.png]


“That’s right! Your villainy is at an end. It’s for me to lock you up and throw away tur-key! Your time at the top of the pecking order has come to a hen-d!”

“Never! It might seem like I’m in a bit of a peckle, but the cluck hasn’t run out on my time as Turkeyton’s master villain!”

“Snood, it’s time for you to put the ‘beak’ in ‘be-quiet’! Let’s dance!”

In a dashing blur, Ruby-ho-oh shot forward and…

[Image: mLkoda.gif]

Centurion: “Whatcha doing, babe?”

Ruby looked up over her shoulder and at her boyfriend. She proudly showed off her papers.

Ruby: “Not that much! Just writing a Thanksgiving children’s story with some pretty fancy illustrations, if I dare say so myself.”

Centurion grabbed the pages and raised an eyebrow.

Centurion: “Hand turkeys?”

Ruby: “Ayyyy-up. I’m gonna enter mine for the XWF Hand Turkey Contest while I’m at it.”

He sighed.

Centurion: “Sometimes I worry you indulge Lane too much with all of his dumb ideas.”

Ruby: “Oh really? Or are you just saying that because you know you’ve no chance of beating my Ruby-ho-oh?”

Ruby grinned as Centurion squinted. He knew she was baiting him into a challenge, but he wasn’t going to let himself get caught. Not this time. He looked back at the pages.

Centurion: “Bit heavy on the turkey puns, no?”

Ruby: “Oh yeah? Keep criticizing and you won’t even get to first baste tonight. And that wishbone pulling tomorrow is gonna be you wishing to bone!”

Centurion: “… I love the turkey puns. And those were another great couple ones! I can’t get enough of them!”

Ruby: “That’s what I thought! Now gimme that!”

She snatched the papers out of his hands and put pencil to paper once more, but she was drawing a blank.

Ruby: “Well gosh-cluckin’ dang it, my groove is gone, my guy!”

Centurion: “Don’t worry, I was about to step out for a bit. I’ll bring donuts when I get back, those always get you in the moo… Erm, groove.”

He kissed Ruby on the forehead, took Garnet’s leash and took the dog out for a walk while Ruby sat alone with her papers. Knowing fully well that inspiration wouldn’t come until she’d had one with sprinkles and cream filling, Ruby got up and went to the walk-in closet. It was hard to resist the call of her cape and cowl ( or rather, mask and spandex), but she knew she was going to need every bit of strength if she wanted to stand a chance in the XWF’s Anarchy Thanksgiving Turkey Rumble. Defeating Lord Raab had felt right, and deserved, but he had been anything but the slim, easy pickings that others made him out to be. His recklessness and gung-ho attitude in the ring made him predictable, but it also meant that every shot and punch was packed with an extra ounce of pure hate and vitriol… and some slime, too. And Ruby’s own style wasn’t exactly conservative either. ‘The Human Projectile’ was one of her nicknames back in the good old days of the IWW (Illinois Women’s Wrestling) when she’d been a young up-and-comer. She wasn’t ‘old’ now, but she was no spring chicken either. Not anymore. The days of taking a dozen baseball bats to the skull, having a light tube smashed over your back and having to remove a bag of thumb tacks from your chest before a night of hanging at a bar or club and then waking up at 7 AM as fresh as a cucumber were gone… That was just the harsh reality. Focus was needed, now more than ever. And knowing one’s limits. … to a certain extent.

Speaking of focus, Ruby knew she had a bit of time to kill. So she fired up the Go-Pro.

Ruby: “Motherflippers, do y’all know what time it is? It’s time to go get ready to ruby-rumble, baby! There’s only a few certainties in life. Donuts, tacos, undertaxed rich folk, and people who think jaywalking is harmless. Just make sure to always look both ways, my guys! Anywhomst, tomorrow ya gurl is gonna be rumbling in the Anarchy jungle to bring home the Golden Gobbler. Just think how pretty he’d be next to my mans’ Anarchy Championship! I can already see his handsome face in the reflection. So for tomorrow, start the day off right with a nice helping of Ruby-Ohs, and prepare for a feast in more ways than one. Feast on food and drink, responsibly I might add, and tune in to watch yours truliest banana-est, lime-iest, blurriest Super Dear’O push back the tides of evil! I’m gonna have to be fast! Furious! And fffff…phenomenal! What I do on Thanksgiving, will gobble on in eternity! Flip Cluckin’ yeah!”

[Image: dY7KZz4.png]
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"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (11-24-2021), Bobby Bourbon (11-25-2021), Dolly Waters (11-24-2021),  JimCaedus  (11-24-2021), Theo Pryce (11-24-2021), Unknown Soldier (11-24-2021)
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