BOB Headquarters


A nervous and sweaty Herschel Kiss stands at attention as Miss Fury paces in front of him, her arms crossed behind her back. After a moment, she stops, turns to him, and asks,


Miss Fury: "Can you defeat Lacklan?"


Herschel trembles and his voice breaks.


Herschel Kiss: "Y... Yes."


Fury's brow deepens as she barks back!


Miss Fury: "What Did You Say!?"


Herschel looks worried for a second, but quickly gets his shit together!


Hershel Kiss: "I SAID, YES MA'IM!"


Miss Fury raises an eyebrow. She isn't convinced.


Miss Fury: "Oh yeah? Tell me how!"


Herschel Kiss: "Uhh..."


Fury doesn't break eye contact as she awaits an eventual answer to her query.


"BIG PUDDIN~!" Hershel Kiss: "Well I think I just need to give her a big ole hug and fall forward. I mean, I am a PRETTY big guy. No way some little girl can escape my man meat sandwich!"


Miss Fury shakes her head in disbelief.


Miss Fury: "Lots of wrong there. Lots of wrong... Okay, A, you emphaSIZED the wrong word there BIG guy! B, never say man meat sandwich again. C, you can't beat Sarah, so erase the notion from your head, okay?"


Herschel is sad now. He looks like he may cry.


Hershel Kiss: "Then BOB will help me win?"


Miss Fury: "Let me worry about what BOB will do, and you, you just worry about making Sarah look good."


"BIG PUDDIN~!" Hershel Kiss: "Not possible boss! Standing next to Big Puddin, there's just no way anyone thinks the skinny albino with the goofy eye looks anything but BARF!"


Herschel rubs his hands all over his body. The sickening slaps of his man meat fat flops smacking against his sweaty moist skin will haunt your dreams forever.


Fury just stares in disbelief. Make no mistake, she knows when she employs a moron, but this guy? WOW!


Miss Fury: "STOP THAT!"


Herschel jumps from the shock, but quickly snaps to attention. Fury can be scary!


Herschel Kiss: "Sorry Ma'am! Just tell me what to do!"


Miss Fury: "Your job, is THE job in which I pay you for."


Herschel Kiss: "Uh.. You don't pay me ma'am."


Genuinely confused, Fury questions him.


Miss Fury: "I don't?"


Herschel Kiss: "No ma'am, I'm under contract with XWF as an enhancement talent for Anarchy!"


Fury ponders for a moment. Then produces a large stack of bills.


Miss Fury: "Now I do!"


Herschel Kiss: "What's this for again?"


Miss Fury: "A Job! You game?"


Herschel Kiss: "Does this job involve any running?"


Confused, Fury questions him.


Miss Fury: "No, why?"


Herschel Kiss: "It's just that I don't usually take no jobs that require running. Gotta protect my knees from hard impact activities, ya know?"


Fury looks down at his trembling bowed out knees.


Miss Fury: "Sure, anyway! No, the job doesn't require any running. I just need for you to do one little extra thing for me."


Herschel Kiss: "And that is?"


A devilish grin creeps onto Fury's as she whispers into his ear.


"BIG PUDDIN~!" Herschel Kiss: "OH THAT'S NAAAASTY!"


"I'm in!"


Fade2BOB