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PlaceMarker Getting Down To Borisness
Author Message
Tula Kealiʻi Offline
Registered but either hasn't added self to a roster yet or doesn't RP



XWF FanBase:
The IWC

(gets varying reactions in the arenas, but will be worshiped like a god and defended until the end by internet fans; literally has thousands of online dorks logging on to complain anytime they lose a match or don't get pushed right)


#1
07-08-2020, 05:40 PM

“Nice punch, Tulip! You do good job blin!”

Growing up, I HATED being called Tulip. It was one of those unoriginal insults the white kids in my school would use. “Oh, Tulip! Get it, because it sounds like Tula!” Yes, Steven, I get it. Sorry your parents didn’t have any creativity when they named you.

And yet, when Boris calls me Tulip…I find it somewhat endearing. Maybe its because I know he doesn’t mean anything hurtful by it. In fact, he may actually think my name is Tulip. In his various forms of…Borisness, I have heard him call me Tulip, Tula, Comrade, and Stephanie, which was a new one for me.

Boris is complimenting me as I continue to do my strikes against the bag. I’ve decided to no longer chase the things I won’t succeed in. I’ll never be a high flyer, or a wrestler that’s able to do a bunch of incredible moves. What I have is my punching and kicking power, and my ability to turn a human being into something you can order at Auntie Anne’s. I don’t need to worry about what kind of counter an opponent can put on me when I kick them really hard in the mouth.

What is Boris doing? The same thing he always does when we hit the gym – he’s sitting at the table, sipping on a large Dunkin Donuts coffee while he alternates between looking at me and the TV in front of me. He has his pair of sunglasses on – not his normal, every day pair that he wears to everything, but a second pair that goes OVER the first pair. Boris seems to think that disguises him from fans. The bright yellow tracksuit and the large wool hat says otherwise. The people here recognize Boris – they just don’t want to get anywhere near him.

I deliver my last, powerful strike before stepping back and wiping my head. I can feel the bruises forming on my shins. After a few more sessions, I’ll barely feel it, but I need to get back into the rhythm. I have to – if my shins are getting bruised just by hitting the bag, how are they going to feel when they come crashing across Tommy Wish’s skull? Probably a bit sore.

I walk over to the table where Boris is and grab my towel.


“Done already comrade?”

“Already? I’ve been hitting the bag for almost an hour. I need to give my limbs a break."

“You think Sane Morrison is taking break blin? He is a zombie cyka! He does not rest!”

“He’s not a real zombie, Boris. That’s just a character he plays.”

“Sane once had ripped torn from body! Boris saw it! And he still live blin! I do not think it is character.”

Boris – ever the character. I appreciate him giving me the motivation I need to keep pushing forward, though. Any other trainer I had would either try to beat me into submission, or they would give some motivating speech as to how great I supposedly am and how “I can do it!” Boris, though…he just delivers me the truth – in his own, Boris way.

“I’ll so some reps in the afternoon. Right now, I just want to get to the hotel and take a nap and watch some film on my opponents.”

“Aye, you do not need film blin. Boris knows everything about these two!”

This should be good.

“Oh really? Tell me about them, oh Wise Boris.”

“Like Boris said, Sane is zombie. He bite you and you turn into zombie, too. As wrestler, he is not very good, but this does not matter when he is invincible. Stay away from his mouth cyka. And Tim Wash, he is debil. He think he is good wrestler, but he is not. He is member of TUGS. Also member of Bad Brothers. He lose almost every match, but he has Jim Blank at ring, so they will try to hurt you blin.”

I pull out a chair at the table and sit down. I lay both of my legs across Boris, who doesn’t even flinch. It’s almost as if he didn’t even notice. He is close – in typical Boris fashion, he has a few things right, but they’re all garbled in with some ridiculous things.

“Ok, so the first person is named Zane Norrison. And he is not a real zombie…”

“He is bl…”

I put my finger in front of where Boris’ mouth would likely be underneath his mask, and I continue on.

“He either is or he isn’t, but he’s also someone who has skills, all be it very inconsistent. Sometimes he picks up big wins against major opponents, and sometimes he loses in matches he should easily win. And Tommy Wish is a member of THUGS with John Black. They WERE members of the Brotherhood of Baddies, but they’re not anymore. That whole organization seems to be a house of cards that is just collapsing.”

Boris laughs.

“These debils. It is not good idea to build a house made out of cards. Didn’t their babushka teach them anything?”

I reach over and grab Boris’ coffee. I take a swig out of it, and again, Boris does not seem phased by any of this. This must be common in communist countries.

“I guess not.”

“These Bad Brothers, cyka blyat. They are nothing more than Western spies! They want to pick fight with Hero Ruby, and now they fight with Friend Tulip. And if they fight with Hero Ruby and Friend Tulip, they will also fight against Boris! Oppa!”

All I can do is crack a smile. Ruby and I don’t NEED Boris’ help, per say, to take down this group of no talent meat bags known as the Brotherhood of Baddies…but it certainly won’t hurt. And I know Boris will have my back if John Blake or Zane’s alien friend tries to get involved. Because Boris is good people, despite being…well, Boris.

“Oppa indeed.”

[Image: tenor-3-1.gif]
9-10-0
2x Anarchy Champion
1x and current XWF Micronesian Champion
XWF Star Of The Month - October 2020
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[-] The following 2 users Like Tula Kealiʻi's post:
"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (07-09-2020), Zane Norrison (07-08-2020)




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