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X-treme Wrestling Federation » Anarchy Boards » Anarchy RP Board
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CENSORED BAR
Author Message
Ruby Offline
The Super Dear'o



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#1
07-08-2020, 02:27 PM

An outstretched hand pushes the door open, and the cameraman it presumably belongs to steps through. We enter what can best be described as a dive bar: unglamorous, eclectic, and big neon signs up on the walls. Except those signs aren’t advertising for light beer, but spell out things such as ‘XWF’, ‘PG13’, and ‘ANARCHY’. We pan over to the bar, above which is a giant TV showing a replay of Superbowl 50. Beneath it is a small woman in her late twentiesn sporting a green shirt, drying a newly washed beer glass with a yellow towel. Even without the mask, we easily identify her as Ruby, the Anarchy champion. She looks right into the camera and winks.

Ruby: “Ayooo, what’s going on, my dudes and dudettes!? Ish ya girl Rubes here, and even through this lens, I can see the look of confusion on your faces. Where’s the usual getup, right? Why am I not wearing the mask? Why are we using regular cameras, rather than a GoPro strapped to my head?”

She shrugs and puts down the glass underneath the nearest tap.

Ruby: “Well, I’m off duty for tonight. Yes, it happens. Besides, have you seen those crime rates plummet as of late? Jaywalking’s down 81%! Besides, good old Vinnie gave me a great idea. So therefore, I bid you welcome… to the bar!”

She pulls the tap’s handle, slowly filling the glass with a pitch black stout.

Ruby: “A place where we can all pour ourselves a pint, and enjoy each other’s company without any need for constant cussing or dumb edgelord behavior. A place where we can talk, pour our hearts out, and where you can always find an understanding ear that’s willing to listen. I think we all can use a place like this.”

She finishes pouring, and puts the beer in front of her.

Ruby: “And like every bar, the bar needs a tender. As you can see, I’ve got experience. I actually tended a bar for a good while back when I was living in Vancouver a few years ago. Everybody’s welcome here, as long as they follow the rules! This isn’t an anarcho-syndicalist commune!!”

Now that we’re on the subject, allow me to be the first one to pour her heart out for a bit. Anarchy. This week, ya girl’s scheduled to face Micheal Graves. I’m barely going to entertain the ridiculous notion that he can just change up the card at his own whim and send someone else to fight me. I know ‘Anarchy’ implies there are no rules, but we brought order, remember? And that doesn’t change, no matter how many times the Bobbies gang up on unsuspecting roster members. If Mickey wants to run and hide from the hiding he’s about to get, then he should just come out and say so. It would save everybody a lot of time and embarrassment. But the arrogance behind the notion that he can just snap his fingers and overrule Vinnie’s card is astounding, quite frankly. I’ve been in enough fights to know when someone’s running from one. I’ve also seen enough caricatures like him to know that they’re just scared their aura of invincibility will wear off like cheap eyeliner during a nice tearjerker. So please, Mickey, stop being delusional. There’s Order on Anarchy. And you’ll either respect it, or go to the back of the line. You ain’t Santa Claus. You ain’t Oprah either, screaming ‘YOU GET A TITLE MATCH, AND YOU GET A TITLE MATCH!!’ Imagine if we all could just do that, what’s the need fir a booking team, then, right? Even if the booking team is probably just Vinnie throwing darts at pictures on the wall whilst blindfolded.”


Ruby sighs, and picks up the stout.

Ruby: “Now, as I am going to enjoy this alcoholic beverage in absolute moderation, please allow me to make ANOTHER thing… perfectly clear, to all of you Bobby miscreants out there who are thinking they can rule over Anarchy! No matter how many people you recruit into your stable during your bid for whatever it is you’re trying to accomplish, you’ll always be at least one more person short. The tiles they are a-changin’, and the potty mouth edgelord is a dying breed in the XWF. This place is evolving towards a better, more inclusive future and we’ll all be better for it. Because the heroes of XWF will stand tall and usher in a new era, while the Brotherhood of Baddies will choke as they desperately gasp for a sliver of relevancy. Your time’s up, and whether Mickey shows up on Anarchy or decides to forfeit this latch altogether, the end result will be all the same. We’ve brought Order to Anarchy. Now it’s time to use that to build something with it, and expand that throughout all of the XWF. Because I’ve seen this place being referred to as a safe haven for all kinds of awful people. And it’s up to all of us to draw the poison out and prove them wrong; I, for one, can’t wait! Cheers!”

As Ruby puts the glass to her lips, she’s interrupted by sirens that are clearly coming from the street. She rolls her eyes and puts it back down.

Ruby: “Really? NOW?? I was kinda hoping to end this thing poetically, you know. My fault there’s such a thing as ‘off-duty’.”

The tiny Canadian rummages underneath the counter and retrieves her trademark mask.

Ruby: “It’s been my pleasure to welcome you to the bar, motherflippers. Hope to see all of you in here real soon. But for now, duty calls.”

And Ruby vanishes, turning into a banana-lime blur in search of justice for all.

[Image: dY7KZz4.png]
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"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (07-08-2020)




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